Gillygate - 14. Secret Admirer

I felt bewildered as I walked the castle halls. Wondering if I'd imagined those sexual undertones with Professor Harcourt… I must have, right? He was strict and dominant for such a young man. I thought of those dark eyes all the way to the Great Hall. Kienna's bushy hair bounced toward me and she was sucking salt off her fingertips. We stopped in the archway.

"I forgot to grab Rod and then he was with his friends… those guys are all real hot and I got intimidated… they've already left for Quidditch practice."

I glanced at the rows of tables before making a decision "Let's just go. I had a big breakfast."

We took the staircases down and left an opening for the grounds. Down a grassy slope I could see a troupe of Gryffindors changed into their Quidditch clothes and making their way to the training field.

"Gryffindor's definitely going to beat Hufflepuff in the game this weekend if they're training even on lunch breaks." Kiena shook her head.

"Come on." I jogged down and she followed behind me. "Hey, Rod!" I called and they all turned to stare. I stopped and regretted it.

"Hufflepuffs." A younger guy regarded the yellow-black on my tie and the stripes on Kiena's blazer. She hung back behind me.

"What is it?" Rod asked.

"We… have to tell you something. About that book."

He looked at another tall guy with shorn hair "This won't take long, Sullivan. I'll see you boys on the pitch."

"They doing your homework, Rod?" One of them guffawed.

Sullivan nodded and led the rest of them away "Move along, guys."

Rod walked between us then spun around "Blimey, Phil…" he kept his voice down and looked up to make sure we weren't getting stared at. Whenever I was around him my skin felt flushed, the sound of his voice got my heart racing. His chestnut hair combed over, not yet windswept by their training "Do you know what a poker-face is?" he looked between us "You told her?"

"Kiena's my best friend."

"Hi…" she said shyly.

"I just thought you'd tell a guy. Your ex maybe?"

"We didn't break up on good terms." My mouth thinned. "Anyway I wasn't sure when we'd get the chance to see you and on Thursday it slipped my mind…" my blood rushed at the thought of yesterday "We found a secret compartment in Gillygate's cabin, it looks like another three portkeys hidden there."

Rodney looked to the backs of his marching teammates and back again "Are you serious?"

"We didn't touch them. We should investigate them over the weekend. All three of us."

"We're playing Hufflepuff on Saturday." He thought "But yeah, afterwards for sure."

"Great. Um, good luck with practice."

"Thanks Phil," he hesitated while thinking of something. "Hey you should meet me at the corner outside the library on our free today. I have a surprise."

"Sure." My heart raced at his coy smirk, he turned and left us.

"Bye…" Kiena called awkwardly. The two of us started walking side-by-side, back up to the castle. She turned to me "You hate being called Phil."

"Yes, but Rod has a really big and really nice penis I'd like to keep sucking." I grumbled back "And how about you? Can you stop acting like a moony school-girl around him? He is gay, remember."

"Sorry," she snapped. There was silence for several more footsteps before she spoke up again "…do you like Rod?"

"He's not in my league. Besides he said what he wants with me is purely sexual."

"Oh… yeah I suppose."

"Why do you ask?"

"It's just…" she slowed to a stop after I did and we looked at each other. Kiena sighed "I heard rumours and I saw them together. I think Quintin and Huet are dating now."

I blinked at her. Looked aside and processed while trying to fight the internal loss. If I said myself that we were broken up why do I give a shit? But for whatever reason I did give a shit. I'd wanted Quintin to be hurt over what he'd done. I'd wanted him to stew in his loneliness and realise what he threw away. In my own hurt-blinded anger I hadn't considered he'd try to soothe his pain by jumping into a relationship with someone else. Least of all the boy he'd been cheating on me to start with.

I'd been trying to soothe my pain by being intimate with Rod. But what I said to Kiena was right, Rod only wanted me for sex and I definitely wasn't the only guy he was messing around with. I wasn't usually a whore. Rod was really hot and partially I wanted to get back at Quintin. But I was still alone and now doubly hurt because Quintin was now in a relationship with the guy who wrecked ours. It felt like my heart was breaking again.

How ridiculous, how childish, how selfish of me. To want the relationship to be over but not for Quintin to be over me. My eyes glistened. Why does this bother me so much?

"Oh Philkin I'm sorry!" she hugged me and I had to push her away after a second. I didn't want to start crying but I did want to punch something.

"I'm going to head to the lavatory… then I'll see you in the Great Hall."

"Okay…" she was hesitant as I left her. Wiped my eyes as I turned down a walkway into the castle. Making my way quickly to the nearest boy's lavatory and storming inside. I wasn't going to cry, I just needed some time alone to get it together and splash some water onto my face.

I glared at my stained reflection over a sink. Kiena was right, I do feel awful about sleeping around for spite. Now I feel alone and ridiculous. I turned away and faced a fluttering paper crane at eye level. My expression changed to shock. I held out my hand and let it unfold itself delicately.

Fαirest one, so cruel α ωorld to shoω indifference to its fαirest creαtion. Your luck hαs been fαr from ideαl this ωeek. Word reαched me of your αccident outside the Hufflepuff common room, and I hαve seen your dαstαrdly ex-lover ωith his neω sωine αround the cαstle. I ωould not even touch a hαnd to your fαce lest you breαk. And yet I must remαin αnonymous for the moment. I only ωished to convey thαt you αre deeply cαred for, pleαse keep your chin up αnd the bright spαrk of your countenαnce αlive.

"Must remain anonymous for the moment?" I read. The snake in the corner was more pronounced this time, I fetched out my wand "Fat chance of that happening. Avenseguim!" the paper shot up and hovered "Take me to him." It tumbled back through the air and I raced after it, hoping to put an end to this mystery once and for all.

My eyes were up and a few younger years jumped aside to avoid me. I felt a little bad but didn't stop running. Hoping a teacher or prefect wasn't going to appear and scold me – that would ruin everything. Fortunately I made it outside the castle and onto the grounds, whoever wrote it was bound to be in view. As if carried by the wind I saw my note tumble toward the Forbidden Forest. I felt a hit of nerves as it rolled over a grassy drop. I could always use a summoning charm to pull it back, but didn't want to risk using the tracker spell more than once. I kept my eye on the paper as I took the path down the hill. The gamekeeper's cabin stood in the distance. I slowed as I approached the forest's edge, the paper was a few metres overhead and it fluttered between the tall trunks.

I was afraid of the Forbidden Forest, but luckily I didn't have to trek far. There was a dirt clearing and at the other end a Slytherin boy sat by the base of a tree. His rucksack lay beside him, a book and packet of dry crackers in his lap. A thin guy, dark hair and eyes, with purplish marks around them. It made his face gaunt and a little frightening. Sharp nose and features, lidded eyes. He was almost sickly pale but in a way still adequately good-looking. He was in my year but I couldn't remember his name.

The paper crossed the expanse to him and nestled itself atop his book. A smile broke across his unreadable expression "You figured it out. Hello, Philkin."

o0O0o

spellman's syllabry

Avenseguim - Tracker Spell

Accio - Summoning Charm