In Chandler's Hands - 12. If You Want To View Paradise. . .

Brandon!

Where were you guys? I looked into that crowd and I didn’t see that beautiful, expectant face anywhere!

It’s ok. I understand. From what we’ve been talking about lately, it sounds like you and your Dad both have been pretty busy! Anyway, I’ve attached some free tickets to our next showing of Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory. I hope you guys can come! I’m proud of what we’ve made out of this musical! We’ve had sold out shows for a couple of weeks now! I’m sure you guy will love it!

Speaking of busy…

So, her name is Marilyn, huh? Like Marilyn Monroe? I’m so glad to hear that your Dad is moving on and dating again. I can only figure that it must feel weird for you having another woman there being with your Dad who isn’t your mother, but I think it is the best thing for him. I promise! I don’t go much for that Bible business these days, but I agree with Genesis where God figured it wasn’t good for Adam to be alone and so He made Eve (or in my case ‘Steve’) to be his lifemate. Remember that when you are feeling a little put off by Marilyn. She’ll do wonders for your Dad and, no, she’ll never replace your Mom. But, she might fill a void in your life you didn’t know you had. You do need a feminine influence in your life. Especially being gay, having a woman in your life that is close, but one step removed from your Mom, can be very helpful. It might just be that she’ll be your biggest ally in your coming out someday. I’ve found that women that aren’t completely brainwashed are a lot more accepting of having a gay son or step-son in their lives. They can also be the greatest advocate a gay boy can have in proving their case with their Dads! Just food for thought…

It sounds like you, yourself, have been having some outstanding luck on the relationship-front too!

Billy really said he loved you? Just like that?

Well, Brandon, then there will only be one person to blame if you don’t jump on that as fast as a cat on a cricket! Billy’s let go of his fears for you, so now, no matter what fears you might still have about things, you owe it to Billy to really share how you feel too! Especially since you have already told him ‘me too’! That’s a confession! That’s the truth and you are officially out now! Out to the only person to which it matters! The one that you love!

The hard part is over! It’s only a matter of logistics now. How to meet, where to meet, when to meet…etc. Small stuff! Easy stuff in comparison! The only thing that can complicate things seriously is letting your own doubts and fears get in the way of your own happiness! The door’s open, boy baby! It is up to you to walk through and into candyland!

You may not know it yet, but you’ve found paradise! There’s no greater feeling in this world than to love and be loved in return! It’s worth every price. There’s nothing anyone else can do or say to make that love less between you. It’s only up to the two of you. I understand feeling the need to stay safe from idiots at school and adults that won’t understand, but, ultimately, this is something that belongs to both of you, now, and to no one else! No one has the right to tell you how to feel or how you should feel about someone else! Trust in your feelings and live them freely! You have an ally in me if in no one else. If things go bad with parents or ‘friends’, just let me know. You’ve got my support kiddo! I’m here and I will help in all ways that I can.

You have arrived! 🎵🎶 If you want to view paradise…simply look around and view it! 🎶🎵

Sorry…I let my ‘Willy Wonka’ slip again.

I’m glad I got to play Willy Wonka in this production. I know I keep harping on it, but there is something of a lesson in how he is as a character. It’s true, he’s something of a narcissist with some psychopathic tendencies, meaning he cares more about himself than anyone else most the time…or seems to. But, at least in the way the old movie had him, that was partly a test to bring out the narcissism in others. He was, after all, trying to find a replacement for himself and perhaps the best way he could do that was by becoming what he disliked most about certain people. Those that reacted in the OPPOSITE way from how he was acting was the person that Wonka wanted as his replacement…namely Charley. Charley was pure of heart. Human (in that he did make mistakes), but someone who could own up to his mistakes and take responsibility for them. He was generous of spirit and filled with the wonder and imagination of a child. Things that Wonka saw driven out of a lot of adults because of the way the world tends to want ‘normalize’ people and kill whatever inspiration they might have inside themselves.

That’s something I hope I never lose…that spark of wonder! You, Brandon, remind me a lot of Charley! You’re so open and honest that it kills you to have to hide who you really are. That’s why, someday soon, I hope you’ll be able to take the leap and allow yourself to dream yourself into the person you always wanted to be! It takes courage, but allowing yourself to dream your truth and live it is a gift beyond price! Trust me on this!

You’ve already seen it happening…you dreamed that Billy would love you and now you have proof of that dream becoming real! You imagined it, you pursued it, and now it is a reality! We make our own worlds! We dream them and, if we work at it, we make those dreams come to life. You just have to follow your truth and don’t let anyone, not even your Dad, tell you what that truth is for you. Only you can know what it is.

We are creatures of imagination. We are the music makers and the dreamers of dreams.

Here’s the poem our director had me memorize since I have to quote it in the musical. It talks about us dreamers in the most beautiful way:

~

We are the music makers,

And we are the dreamers of dreams,

Wandering by lone sea-breakers,

And sitting by desolate streams; —

World-losers and world-forsakers,

On whom the pale moon gleams:

Yet we are the movers and shakers

Of the world for ever, it seems.

With wonderful deathless ditties

We build up the world's great cities,

And out of a fabulous story

We fashion an empire's glory:

One man with a dream, at pleasure,

Shall go forth and conquer a crown;

And three with a new song's measure

Can trample a kingdom down.

We, in the ages lying,

In the buried past of the earth,

Built Nineveh with our sighing,

And Babel itself in our mirth;

And o'erthrew them with prophesying

To the old of the new world's worth;

For each age is a dream that is dying,

Or one that is coming to birth.

A breath of our inspiration

Is the life of each generation;

A wondrous thing of our dreaming

Unearthly, impossible seeming —

The soldier, the king, and the peasant

Are working together in one,

Till our dream shall become their present,

And their work in the world be done.

They had no vision amazing

Of the goodly house they are raising;

They had no divine foreshowing

Of the land to which they are going:

But on one man's soul it hath broken,

A light that doth not depart;

And his look, or a word he hath spoken,

Wrought flame in another man's heart.

And therefore to-day is thrilling

With a past day's late fulfilling;

And the multitudes are enlisted

In the faith that their fathers resisted,

And, scorning the dream of to-morrow,

Are bringing to pass, as they may,

In the world, for its joy or its sorrow,

The dream that was scorned yesterday.

But we, with our dreaming and singing,

Ceaseless and sorrowless we!

The glory about us clinging

Of the glorious futures we see,

Our souls with high music ringing:

O men! it must ever be

That we dwell, in our dreaming and singing,

A little apart from ye.

For we are afar with the dawning

And the suns that are not yet high,

And out of the infinite morning

Intrepid you hear us cry —

How, spite of your human scorning,

Once more God's future draws nigh,

And already goes forth the warning

That ye of the past must die.

Great hail! we cry to the comers

From the dazzling unknown shore;

Bring us hither your sun and your summers;

And renew our world as of yore;

You shall teach us your song's new numbers,

And things that we dreamed not before:

Yea, in spite of a dreamer who slumbers,

And a singer who sings no more.

Ode

BY ARTHUR O'SHAUGHNESSY