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3,717 Journeyman Scribe 1st Class

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About pvtguy

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  1. pvtguy

    Chapter 15

    I really like the zeroing in that Ben is doing. So au courant with what's happening in Minneapolis at the moment...
  2. Hmmm....Ritch as a lawyer and pilot? I could see that, but don't know if he will follow that route. We'll have to wait to see what's in store for him. Great chapter as always, Carlos! Tony
  3. pvtguy


    Brilliant chapter! It's wonderful to see Rick now living his truth. Can't wait for the next chapters!!
  4. Very interesting style of writing for a short story. I really like this author's stories and his ability to put together a compelling plot. This one is, in my opinion, not equal to other stories posted by this author, but that is not to say it is not worth reading - it is!
  5. I'm betting that two months prove to be too long...yet I understand Matt's need to be with his dad. I'll bet Aidan does feel a bit of separation anxiety. Great chapter!!
  6. pvtguy

    Chapter 7

    I still find it a bit unsatisfying... but then again, all doesn't have to be tied up neatly. I feel badly for the school especially - even though it sounds as though it was not all that wonderful to begin with having such a weak principal. And as for Professor Hearst: it matters not how wonderful a teacher he was, in that he was also a pedophile, he may be found "guilty" of murder for which he has been framed, but he is still guilty for killing the souls of how many victims! I don't have one bit of sympathy for him. Now on to your next story!
  7. pvtguy

    Chapter 6

    It would be too easy to conclude that the mystery is solved at this point...that would make the story too short and unsatisfying. After all, intrigue is needed! Now, on to the next chapter!!
  8. pvtguy

    Chapter 4

    You've captured quite well the "logic" of teens but also have created the intrigue to know what was really going on.
  9. pvtguy

    Chapter 2

    This chapter reminds me of Jean Paul Sartre's short story "No Exit" in that Noelle is cognizant of her state because she is still in the memory of someone. Well done.
  10. I loved the entire chapter and all you accomplished therein. I especially loved the moment with Brett: Ritch's connection with him is confirmed. Thank you, Carlos. Your excellent writing and story telling are much appreciated!
  11. pvtguy

    Chapter 14

    Ok...Ben is slowly building the scene before he starts parcing it for inconsistencies. I know it's slow, but I find it a more accurate approach than the quick "I gotcha!". Would enjoy more frequent postings....hint!
  12. Oh, the mystery of it all! What is this organization of which G, Zeke and Corey are involved? Curiouser and curiouser...
  13. pvtguy

    Subito Forte

    Ah! At last - Rick's testicles have descended! And it's due to his finding out from Rita her true nature. Wonderfully well written chapter - and the title is, like every chapter name so far, most appropriate!
  14. He wasn’t the only one; I doubt if Nostradamus could have predicted it. A laugh-out-loud line if ever there was one! Robbie's life has been full of challenges - so why not now too? Very intriguing twist!
  15. The relaxed atmosphere allows for each of them to just be themselves. It gives Matt a fuller view of Seamus both as an individual but as a person loved much by his friends.
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