The Longest Third Date - 1. BOOK 1

Just now, stefan7891 said:

i can't click fast enough. i have a feeling that this is going to be a very epic story masterfully written like you always do. like i'm really excited for this. is this already complete? cause don't you dare tease me with something this good. how dare you make me feel happy for a moment. ha ha.

 

I'll be posting this next year. And you're right...this is a teaser 😂

Sorry for keeping your hopes up.

But I'm awfully writing this at a faster pace. Probably because romantic stories are my jam.

Just now, LJCC said:

I'll be posting this next year. And you're right...this is a teaser 😂

Sorry for keeping your hopes up.

But I'm awfully writing this at a faster pace. Probably because romantic stories are my jam.

here you go making me fall for characters i'll be reading months from now. i hate you. ha ha. but this teaser is really really good. like im actually watching a netflix documentary.

Just now, stefan7891 said:

here you go making me fall for characters i'll be reading months from now. i hate you. ha ha. but this teaser is really really good. like im actually watching a netflix documentary.

 

Sorry. My bad. 😆

But I always post stories ahead, so I won't be fickle-minded about repeatedly changing things up.

That way, I actually get to finish writing this. 

Because I will finish this...I'm already invested in the story that I've dreamt of them for two nights in a row, which forced me to finally write things down and end their yammering in my head.

This sounds really interesting. Looking forward to it. Even if we have to wait a little while.

35 minutes ago, VBlew said:

This sounds really interesting. Looking forward to it. Even if we have to wait a little while.

 

It's been very interesting so far.

The Netflix interview sitdown is written in present tense, while the bulk of the story is written in 3rd Person POV.

It's basically a Netflix documentary interview on every major episode or chapter.

I'm definitely having fun writing this. 😁

Updates? When will the story hit it off? Part 1 or 2?

Just now, Erik said:

Updates? When will the story gets going?

The story I've written was lost--deleted from my old macbook. It was around 50k+ already.

So I rewrote this story again, and currently at 20k+ words. Expect 3 to 4 months before I finish this. 

I prefer the 2nd version imo. 😁

Oke, some extra work! As I read it will be worth while. Bon chance!

when are you posting the entire story? been waiting for this for ages.

2 minutes ago, stefan7891 said:

when are you posting the entire story? been waiting for this for ages.

Currently at 107k (at the time of this message) with around 9 or 10 more chapters to go.

This is quite a long story, something I never anticipated, to be honest.

So roughly around June or July'ish.

This is by far the weirdest beginning to a story I've ever seen. Adding media files and presenting it as a visual medium in the form of a documentary is just bizarre to my tiny brain. 

When I first read the premise of your story, I was instantly intrigued. I've been on lots of third dates and barely could stand the person that was attached to the dick I was wanting. So being stuck with someone for that long of time in another country lends itself to some many twists and turns and fodder for some fun storytelling.

I love that idea and had one similar in regards to being stuck in a house with people you don't know or like during Covid.

But then you present a chapter? introduction? in such a way that you know they are together at least long enough to have a Doc filmed about their lives. For me it takes out the will they or won't they aspect I was looking for. And presented like a transcript of a show is off putting. 

I have never read any of your other work so I almost dipped out after reading that because it's just so different. But then you said in the comments that the rest of the story takes place in third person so because I love your premise, I'm going to go along, cautiously, to see how you bring your idea to life. 

Above you said new content should be available in June or July, even though it's almost September with nothing new yet, I'm going to follow this story so I'll get notified when you post something new. I'll go along and let you take me where your mind wills. 

J

2 hours ago, Jason Rimbaud said:

I've been on lots of third dates and barely could stand the person that was attached to the dick I was wanting.

😂😂😂 Sorry about that.
 

2 hours ago, Jason Rimbaud said:

This is by far the weirdest beginning to a story I've ever seen. Adding media files and presenting it as a visual medium in the form of a documentary is just bizarre to my tiny brain. 

Yeah, my beta reader also commented on that part that the beginning doesn't make sense for him, but he's on board now, I believe (I think.)

Right @drown? 😂

I'm still working on writing towards the end, so the beginning (the one you've read) will definitely change once I write that part, because the ending and the beginning (this part) will have a very important connection.

Quote

I have never read any of your other work so I almost dipped out after reading that because it's just so different. But then you said in the comments that the rest of the story takes place in third person so because I love your premise, I'm going to go along, cautiously, to see how you bring your idea to life. 

Here's the link of the 3rd POV narrative I put as an excerpt: 

Also, the excerpt:

Story Excerpt, taken from Scene 1, Chapter 8: Relationships? Advice—Anyone?

As twilight settled in, the running lights danced along the inlet, their glow seeping through the large, clear window. A glass of wine sat untouched on the table, with the other glass sipped clean and bonedry. Klebber was at the corner table. Seated across was Sargeant Morone. They were outside the terrace, their gazes fixed on the docks and the Brooklyn Bridge. The ambient light underlined Klebber's hair and his lashes, framing his right eye. He had worn a winter's topcoat for the night, with an open vest revealing his collarbone and chest—a seductive way to end things.

Why did he wear such an outfit if his intention was to break someone's heart?

Hearing the words that wavered out of Klebber's lips, Sergeant Morone struggled with his own thoughts that gnawed in his chest. But he knew he had to say it. There was no other way.

With a mournful smile, the officer left a couple of ten-dollar bills on the table, his eyes locked on his beauteous date. "If you ever have a change of heart, you know where to find me," he whispered. Getting up from his chair, he planted a tender kiss on Klebber's cheeks, and in the blink of an eye, he hauled a cab and vanished into the city's nocturne—likely to seek the company of libations at a local gay bar to drown out his sorrows.

Klebber held his mouth. Moist welled up in his eyes, threatening to overflow. He hurriedly left the restaurant, seeking to abate feelings of loneliness on the familiar bench just across the restaurant overlooking the East River.

Klebber's always been like this—locked up tight, never letting anyone get too close. He'd always share the story of his late husband with his dates, thinking it would make them understand why he had chosen to be alone. But deep down, his heart has been shattered three times. First, by his twin brother. Next, by his father. And then by Adam. Subjecting himself to another heartbreak would be asking for it. So he'd rather protect himself from getting hurt again than risk falling in love and having it all ripped away.

Meters ahead, parked near the restaurant, a 2020 white Lexus LX sat idly, its hazard lights blinking. Inside the car, Dennis put down the binoculars and turned to Marissa, seated at the back, a quizzical expression on his face, and asked, "What's up with your uncle? It seemed like he ended things with that guy, but why does he look so down? Don't tell me he's catching feelings for that loser!"

With a chicken nugget in hand, Marissa dipped it into the barbecue sauce and said between bites, "Auntie Tamara said that Uncle Klebber has a big problem with getting attached to anyone. She said he still loves Uncle Adam."

So, yeah. The majority is told in a 3rd POV story, not from an interview perspective. Otherwise, it would be weird to write almost 190k++ words of pure transcript. Haha. That would be exhausting to read, and I don't want to drive readers crazy. 

3 hours ago, Jason Rimbaud said:

Above you said new content should be available in June or July, even though it's almost September with nothing new yet, I'm going to follow this story so I'll get notified when you post something new. I'll go along and let you take me where your mind wills. 

One thing I value more as a writer is quality over quantity. If you happen to browse any of my stories, you'd know what I mean.

My pedantic self would never allow such to compromise my work. So yeah, I'd rather put out something I'd be happy to read ten years from now and say, "I fucking did that...damn," than say, "Shit! I forgot to put a period and there's a run-on sentence. WTF." 

Anyway, I've been working on the story for nearly a year now. Originally, I wrote around 40k+ words, but lost it when my laptop died and I forgot to save it. I stepped back around for a few months and asked myself if I really wanted to write this again, and seeing as the plot, the characters, and the world this story is were living in my mind rent-free where I couldn't evict them, I knew I had to keep on writing this.

I keep posting updates here:

Previously at 144k words on the day of this posting (06/01/24).

Previously at 159k words on the day of this posting (07/01/24).

Currently at 173k words on the day of this posting (08/01/24).

To show that I'm working on this until I finish it.

Currently, as of this writing, it's at 190k+ words now.

On 8/30/2024 at 4:36 AM, LJCC said:

On 8/30/2024 at 1:20 AM, Jason Rimbaud said:

This is by far the weirdest beginning to a story I've ever seen. Adding media files and presenting it as a visual medium in the form of a documentary is just bizarre to my tiny brain. 

Yeah, my beta reader also commented on that part that the beginning doesn't make sense for him, but he's on board now, I believe (I think.)

Right @drown? 😂

Haha, I was just randomly checking the story again as it was posted here (with just a teaser!) on New Year's Day!

I swear I was not notified of this mention, but here goes:

This story is expertly crafted and the characters are as interesting as they seem from just the intro part. I was fortunate enough to read from that just this teaser There is a reason for the intro to be as it is. I still believe it to be a higher barrier to entry for the reader, but that's the author's choice to keep it that way. 😛 Once it switches to third, the regular mind rests at ease.

And now wait for the final product, haha.

1 hour ago, drown said:

Haha, I was just randomly checking the story again as it was posted here (with just a teaser!) on New Year's Day!

I swear I was not notified of this mention, but here goes:

This story is expertly crafted and the characters are as interesting as they seem from just the intro part. I was fortunate enough to read from that just this teaser There is a reason for the intro to be as it is. I still believe it to be a higher barrier to entry for the reader, but that's the author's choice to keep it that way. 😛 Once it switches to third, the regular mind rests at ease.

And now wait for the final product, haha.

Wait for the finished product months from now. 🤣
I assure you, you shall be surprised.
Cause I changed a lot. Lol. 

And as for you, MISTER...
Please finish your story now, because I want to read it.

Love your work, and this is such a huge teaser into what looks like a very interesting story.

15 hours ago, VBlew said:

Love your work, and this is such a huge teaser into what looks like a very interesting story.

Thanks for the support mate.

Give me six months more to finish everything. I'm currently writing the last sequel to this trilogy.

Fingers crossed it'd be up before July.