The Modern Love Waltz - 8. Chapter 8

8: A Stutter

Chris actually stayed with Pops and I. I was surprised. I assumed he was going to dip out as soon as he could, but instead he sat silently with Pops and I as we watched Jeopardy in Pops's living room. Every now and then Pops would ask a question to Chris or I about something random, but Pops wasn't much for small talk and has always been happier in silence.

After the game show, Pops retired to his room. Once he left our presence, Chris and I sat in silence. "So?" I started.

"What?"

"Do you want to go somewhere? Do something?" I asked.

"No. N-n-n-not with you!" He replied.

"Ha! Thanks!" I laughed. I understood. He didn't want to be seen in public with me.

"No th-th-that's not what I meant..." he began.

"Don't worry about it. I understand."

A minute of silence came between us before Chris spoke up, "You want to go on another walk?" He sounded as though he were trying to hide his intentions. As if walking was normal and innocent.

I smiled, "sure."

We walked around the huge property Pops owned. It was dark now, so Chris didn't know where he was. I had been here so many times I knew the whole landscape by heart. Our conversation seemed pretty tame for a while. Neither of us brought up what had happened earlier. Instead Chris told me about how he wanted to go to college but (like most people in this town) just couldn't afford it.

"I'm supposed to be in Northern Virginia meeting with D.C. United about being a striker," I said, wondering if he knew what that would mean.

Like a true Heathsville townsperson he knew exactly what I was talking about, his eyes lit up, "really! That's a-a-a-amazing!"

"Yeah," I sighed. "I don't know... I just don't feel motivated like I used to. And in my current state..." I stopped, I didn't mean to hurt him, but Chris was definitely beating himself up. I was afraid for a second that he might cry when he realized that I may not get the spot because of the wounds he caused me.

After more silence between the two of us, Chris spoke, "I had n-n-never been kissed."

"What?" I asked, not really understanding at first.

"You're the first person I ever kissed," he replied, ashamed.

"Ha! Really?" I asked. "You mean the first guy."

"No, first PERSON... e-e-e-ever. And the first p-p-p-person to ever t-t-t-touch my..." he said his voice trailing off in shame.

"Oh. Ha... sorry about that. Something about you brings something out of me that I've never really seen before. I feel totally comfortable. Like I have nothing to lose around you," I replied.

"Yeah? Well something in y-y-y-you brings out something in me th-th-that I've never really seen before either," his faced reddening. We both laughed knowingly.

Our laughs died off and we were left standing still in silence looking into each other's eyes. I placed my hand on his shoulder and pulled him closer to me. Nervously he placed his hand on my hip. His breathing accelerated and his hands were trembling.

"We don't have to..." I began but was interrupted by his lips. I felt the surge of comfort and bravery again and I decided to venture even further. I began to kiss my way to his ear and used my mouth to play with it.

I grabbed the bottom of his plain white t-shirt and slowly began to lift it. It revealed his flat chest and stomach. I pulled the shirt over his head and dropped it next to us. I moved my way down to his trail of hair from his bellybutton kissing the whole time. His breathing accelerated even more as I got closer.

I kissed my way back to his mouth and we continued. He grabbed my shirt but I quickly grabbed his hand. "No," I stated holding his hand from lifting my shirt. I was self-conscious about the bandages.

"I-i-it's okay," he said. My grip softened and he carefully lifted my shirt. It revealed along with my six-pack the three white gauze bandages that Beau had prepared this morning. Chris gasped.

"I can put it back on," I said.

"No," Chris essentially commanded. "Don't." His fingers lightly explored my bandages first then they traveled to my abs. My breathing became heavy as his fingers explored to the waistband of my jeans.

He continued the kiss as he unbuttoned my jeans. I felt my heart begin to race. This was new territory. I had had girlfriends... but I had never gone this far with them.

Slowly Chris's fingers glided the zipper down. He slipped my jeans to my ankles leaving me standing in this wooded area in just my green-plaid boxers which no longer left much to the imagination. We pressed our bodies together again.

Carefully Chris and I laid down in the cool grass, our passionate kiss unceasing. With Chris on top of me, I began to repeat the removal of the jeans process on him. He kicked them off revealing black boxer-briefs.

Soon we were both naked lying in the grass on my grandfather's property. I decided not to go all the way with Chris on pure principle. Everything was going so fast, there was no reason to rush into anything else.

When both of us had reached the boiling point of our sexual appetites, we laid next to each other silently, apart from the sound of our breathing. It was amazing. Chris was amazing. "Now I see why fags are so obsessed with blowjobs!" Chris exhaled.

"What?!" I laughed. "Straight people like blowjobs too!"

"Yeah, but gays are always having sex and shit like that," Chris replied.

"You don't know that! How many gay people are even in this town?! Four?" I smiled.

Chris's expression changed. He stared at me intently, silently. "What?" I asked, nervous as to the sudden change.

"I like it when you smile," he whispered.

I laughed, "Shut up." My smile faded as we stared at each other intently. He leaned in and we kissed again. We laid on our backs, our naked bodies still resting against each other. We stared at the stars which were extraordinary in the country. I couldn't help but laugh at the cliché moment I was happening, with the most unlikely guy.

"What?" He asked in response to my laugh.

"Nothing," I replied.

*~*~*

The next morning I awoke at 9:00. My first thought was that I needed to get back to Northern Virginia. I had been here for far too long. I had school and soccer to return. I missed soccer immensely. It was beginning to plague my dreams. It was like something was missing, and somehow I was using Chris to replace soccer temporarily.

I picked up my phone. "Allo?"

"Hey coach," I replied.

"Sam. How are ya?"

"I'm doing okay," I said. "How was the game I missed?" I felt bad. I knew I was going to miss the game that was on Saturday

"Well, we lost. The guys could really use their captain."

"I know," I sighed.

"How much longer are ya going to be down there?"

I heard a knock at my door. I got nervous, "You know... I don't know. I'm going to have to call you back coach." I said as I hung up. Carefully I approached the window, at the door Beau was standing, anxiously shifting his weight back and forth.

I opened the door and let him in. "Hey Beau," I said. "What's up?"

"I wanted to make sure everything was all right from yesterday," he said.

"Everything's fine. Sorry about that, it was a little weird," I replied.

"That's okay. I understand. Is Zach..." he trailed off.

I shrugged, "I don't know." It wasn't my place to say anything, so I would just fake ignorance. I looked at what Beau was wearing, a tight, shirt that hugged his bulging muscles. I felt a little warm just seeing him like this. I had a soft spot for Beau. He took care of me when he would have been a lot safe off just leaving me.

I took a leap of faith, "Hey Beau. Do you want to... do something tonight?"

"Do something?" He gave me a weary look.

"We could drive to a bigger town to go to the movies. No one would know us there," I said, understanding his trepidation.

He flashed his beautiful smile. His face reddening as he did his trademark rubbing of the back of his head he answered, "That sounds great." He then raised one eyebrow, "Is this a... date?"

I smiled. I liked that idea, "A date? Yeah... a date."