Moving On - 8. Chapter 8

"Ben!" I said in shock while he was walking up the trail to the bus stop where my friends and I always wait, "I didn't expect you to be here."

"Neither did I," he smirked, "Since we're alone now, I thought we could have that moment alone together," he walked towards me, pressing his chest against mine, with his fingers swirling around my chest.

"Oh yeah..." I said and pressed my lips against his.

After a few minutes of passionate kissing. Oh, I love that word, passionate. I'll say it again...after a few minutes of passionate kissing. Sorry, I couldn't resist. Somewhere in the back of my mind, my little gay muse is giving me thumbs up. Then I heard something coming from behind me.

"Ahem," said a voice. I stopped the kiss and I looked at Ben's face, which was frozen in horror as if he had seen a ghost. I turned around to look for the source of the voice. It was Krist standing there with Jake.

"Well...well...well, look what we have here. My friend has been hiding something from us," Krist said, "I knew something happened in my own fucking bathroom. Now I have to call the state health department to sterilize it to rid it of the AIDS you've spread around," he winced in disgust.

"But Krist..." I started to say something.

"Don't even speak to me, fag," he growled.

Ben started to face Krist, but I stopped him.

"Don't..." I told him.

"Jake..." I turned to him, but he put his hand up to me to silence me.

"What have I done to you?" I asked to both of them in a disappointed voice.

"By hiding this disgusting secret," Krist snapped a little loud, "I can't have either one of you as friends. C'mon Jake, let's ditch school. No way am I going to be sharing the bus with them." Jake nodded in agreement and both turned to walk down the trail.

"Guys!" I hollered, "Sorry, but I can explain!"

"Go fuck your boytoy," Krist shouted. Jake responded next by turning around to me, and barked. I meant he literally barked, like a small yapping dog. Then Ben leaned into my cheek, giving it a few big licks. What the fuck is going on with people around me...is the sky falling on me now?! My eyes opened and I found my dachshund licking all over my face and then barking in my ears. I was sleeping on my bed and my dog somehow managed to jump on it to give me a wake up call.

"Jake, you little bitch! Stoppit!"

He backed off and stared at me with his tail wagging like crazy and letting his sad, little innocent eyes drill into mine. Awhhh...so damn cute.

"C'here, you little cute rascal," I pulled him to me to give him a huge belly rub, which he always loves to get, "Now, get out of here. Go bother Mom," I put him off the bed and he ran to the door to get out. Jesus, that little imp gave me the creeps. I was so glad I was just dreaming it all. I certainly hope that won't be their reaction if they ever find out. I just don't want them to find out and be bashed like in the dream.

I put my feet on the floor, still sitting on my bed, just to stretch some more. Oh god, still a little tired and I don't want to go to school. The only thing that is making me go today is obviously Ben. Note to self, get his phone number so I can call him to skip school with me and stay home someday. I lifted my ass off the bed and walked like a zombie to the bathroom to take a hot, steaming shower. And there I got carried away too long while I enjoyed the hot water.

"Steph, get out of there now! It's been thirty minutes. Get down here so you can eat your breakfast," said my mom as she yelled from the stairs, "I'm going to work now. Don't be late for your bus."

"Bye Mom!" I said from the shower. Ten more minutes wouldn't kill me. I have blue balls to relieve right now, thanks to Ben who had caused it in the bathroom at Krist's house. I grabbed my stick and went to work. Hmmm...the pleasure. I'm so going to try to reach nirvana.

After the doing the deed and the shower, I went downstairs to find my bagel and eggs all ready on the table. Jake excitedly jumped all over my legs to get my attention, telling me that his dish was still empty.

"C'here," I told him and he zoomed to me, flipped on his back, hoping I'd rub his belly, which I did, "Hmmm, you're not full. I guess Mom forgot to feed you." I went to the big dog food bag to give him a cup of kibbles. Jake happily munched it like a pig. God...he's a real eating machine...as well as a pooping one.

I finished my breakfast and went to put my coat on; I had to get to the bus stop in five minutes. I ran, knowing better not to do that on the ice after what happened a few days ago, but I couldn't miss the bus and go through a day of not seeing Ben. I reached the bus stop just on time as Krist and Jake were just getting on the bus. I climbed on and gave Fran a very offended look after what she did to me yesterday afternoon. She closed the door and zoomed off so fast that I nearly tripped in the aisle. I knew she did that on purpose. Old hag.

"Alex isn't coming today. He's got the flu," Jake said gently.

"Oh?" Krist and I both said.

"I guess no hockey tonight," Krist said disappointedly.

When we reached the last stop, Ben came on and smiled at me, seeing that my mere presence brightened the world around him. I think otherwise.

"Hey, Ben!" Krist called out to him.

"What the hell...Krist?" I whispered to him, surprised at his action and was wondering what he was up to.

"Come and sit with us," he continued.

Ben's smile disappeared and his eyes opened in surprise, as he froze still.

"C'mon..." Krist got up, pulled his arm to the empty seat next to me, and made him sit, "There! Next to your old pal!" Krist cheerfully said. A few students giggled softly at Ben's obliviousness.

"Speak, Ben," I told him to shake him from shock.

"Oh! Hey...sorry! Err, what's up?" he said as he tried to start a conversation with Krist and Jake. While Krist and Jake were looking away, I rubbed his thigh, hinting that he was making a good move. Ben briefly rubbed my hand in return.

We got off the bus and we all parted to head for our own classes. Krist followed me up the hall as we headed for English.

"He seemed all right and better after whatever happened in the bathroom last night," Krist said as we went in the room and took our seats, "But tell me, what happened? What made him break down?"

"Oh it's nothing much. He was missing his friends," I stumbled out.

"You can tell me anything, you know. I won't get upset. I'm your friend no matter what happens. Even if you kill an old lady or shoot your veins with drugs, I'll still stand by you," he said. I wondered what he meant by that. Did he suspect something back in the bathroom? Did he hear something that I don't want him to be hearing?

"Krist, I can assure you that..." and I was interrupted by the teacher calling for silence so she could do her roll call, "Everything is ok and it's personal for him," I whispered to him under Mrs. Benton's voice. Krist responded by nodding.

"Mr. Jonsson, I see you here but you've not responded to your own name twice," Mrs. Benton said.

"Oh, present!" Krist jumped to attention.

"Pay more attention, next time, young man," she quickly scolded him before continuing on with the roll call.

After a few boring hours in classes, the lunch bell finally rang.

"Ah, heaven!" Krist exclaimed as he and Jake joined me walking to the lunchroom, "I hope they'll serve pizza today because I'm drooling for some."

"Where's Ben?" Jake asked.

"I dunno..." I replied, and looking around I saw him quickly disappearing into the bathroom, "I'll be with you in few minutes." I went in the bathroom as well.

Ben was at the sink, looking at himself in the mirror. I locked the bathroom door, knowing I'd piss off a few kids but whatever.

"Everything is ok?" I hugged him from behind.

"Yea," he sighed, "There's a moron in one of my class's that knows about me now. He knows I'm gay. And he has an issue with it."

"What?" I confusedly said, "How?"

"I'm not afraid of hiding it. My sexuality is no one's business of course, but I won't hide if anyone asks. I won't tell anyone if I don't have to. It's a non-issue to me. I told a couple of girls in my class who apparently were getting too close to me and I was worried they had a crush on me, so I broke the news."

"That doesn't answer about the 'moron ,'" I added.

"Oh, a guy behind me heard me and said a couple of threatening comments. He was disgusted, so he moved to another seat away from me. Usually I don't give a shit, but it brings back some bad memories from a few of my ex-friends. He was going to spread the word all over the school, but I threatened him back good and hard that I could do the same to him. That shut him up pretty quick. It'd be funny if the school knows my name in a couple of days, but I had to save your ass."

I pulled him into a hug and kissed him on the lips.

"Thanks a lot. C'mon, our friends are expecting us. They even asked where you were. See? They care now and want you to be part of our little circle," I smiled, "C'mon..." I pulled him by his hand to the door where I found a teacher waiting with a few students behind him, and he didn't look amused.

"What's going?" he sternly questioned while he sniffed the air checking for some cigarette smells, "Hope you weren't smoking either."

"Of course we weren't. And there's nothing to know, had to comfort a friend for a moment," I quickly brushed it off and walked pass him.

"Whatever, don't lock the door next time, boys," he warned as his voice trailed off as we walked further away from him.

"Ben!" Krist shouted, "Get the buttered noodles while you're at it. It's too damn good," he suggested to Ben as he walked by the table and went to get in line for the food. Ben responded giving Krist a wave.

We got our food and went to the table to sit with our friends.

"As I was saying, I've been trying to get this girl for few weeks, and it seems she falling in my trap now. She got some..."

"Oh Krist! Gimme some more...." Jake interrupted in a feminine voice and rubbed all over his body in a highly sexual manner, which included rubbing his crotch. He was moving his lips in a kissing way. Krist's face grew all red while the rest of us laughed.

"Fuck you!" Krist gave him the finger, and started to giggle before joining us laughing. He calmed down and continued, "I'm not planning that now, but we'll see," he stuck out his tongue and stuffed his mouth with buttered noodles.

"Yeah yeah yeah, I know you got the hots for her. You told me twice already. Lemme know when you actually get her since I heard enough about hearing how to get her," said Jake, rolling his eyes.

The bell rang to end the lunch period, and the students flooded the halls to go to their class. I went to the library for my study period and I found Cecile already sitting down at a table, smiling at me. Something is weird though, as she always had her books out and opened ready for us to study together. Plus, she was at a table, not at a cubicle.

"Why aren't the books out yet? Why at a table all of the sudden?" I asked her as I set my backpack on the table and sat down.

"Nothing too special, I just wanted to talk to you about something, so I thought we could put off the study period today," she said and noticed my confused face, "Well, I don't have much to study and it can be done at home. How about you?"

"Erm, same here. What's up?" I asked suspiciously.

"Well, your 'problem'. How is it going now?"

"That's all? Nothing new so far, because I haven't cut myself for a few days now and I'm not having mental issues with it either. I'm feeling better as far as it seems." I said softly, not letting the others hear me.

"Good. Well, I have to tell you something. It's been killing me and I can't keep the knowledge a secret behind your back. It's something that you have the right to know since I know it as well," she sighed, "But not here...let's get one of those small rooms that the groups always use."

"Okkk..." I added suspiciously. What could she possibly know? There was no way she could know the source of my problem. There had to be no way, since I hadn't given off any sufficient hints for her to put together. It had to be something else. Don't jump to conclusions yet.

She walked to the librarian's desk, requesting the reservation of the room. The librarian gave her a key and nodded that she had permission, and she walked back to me.

"We got it. Let's go," she picked up her backpack and we walked to the room.

"Ok," she said while we settled down in our seats, "I was in the bathroom the other day," she announced. I looked at her all surprised. I was afraid she could say that. It couldn't be...no...but I still can't jump to conclusions because she could mean something else.

"And?" I added.

"Well, I know your 'problem' now and the main reason why you did harm to yourself," she hesitated before saying, "I know about Benoît now. Please don't take it wrong," she looked at me all worried as she reached her hand over to touch mine. I involuntarily pulled mine back away. It took me several full seconds to digest what she had said. Shit...shit...shit...what to do now? She's going to hate me for this.

"I knew I heard something before I left..." I said in trembling voice, "How much did you hear?"

"Everything...I wanted to go to the bathroom alone and that bathroom is rarely used during school. Then I heard someone come in, so I hid in the stall, thinking it could be a teacher. But it was you and Benoît."

"Ben," I interrupted, "No...no one is supposed to know about us now... Why did you spy on us?" I asked and assumed the worse, nothing but the worse.

"I wasn't spying!" she felt a little insulted at my accusation, "Steph...I have no..." she started to say.

"OK! I don't want to hear the bad news. I can't take it. I can understand you don't want me around," I quickly picked up my bags and stormed out of the room with a feeling of shame all over me.

"Steph! That's not what I meant..." she called out to me as I headed to the doors. The librarian and a dozen kids looked at us and appeared all confused. I walked out, feeling like I have to leave this place. I wasn't ready for the drama, even for an unexpected one! I don't want anyone to know...I wanted it to be my little secret with him for a while. Just something to share between us. No way am I ready to have the world fall on me now. Shit...shit...shit...she's probably all disappointed at me for not telling her the truth and probably doesn't want to deal with me, a pathetic gay boy with self-cutting issues. Where is Ben when I need him...?

I walked out of the school and headed down 309 as I looked for somewhere to hide myself so I could think. I walked in a heavy snow squall with the cold wind blowing hard at my face. God, it had to be five degrees out and the wind chill wasn't making it any better. I saw Birna's coffeeshop coming into view through the white haze of heavy snow. So I decided to go in and sit at a table.

"Steph! What are you doing here so early?!" Birna's cheerfully asked.

"I'm just not feeling too well, so I left school early but I have no way to get home till the bus comes later," I replied, "Can you get me the usual?" I asked politely after I found myself a table.

"Sure! Don't worry about the bus. I'll just call the girl to come in an hour early and I'll take you and the rest of the boys at school home. I was planning to do that anyway, and Krist already knows," she said as she pulled at some of the knobs of the big coffee machine to make me some café au lait with whipped cream. She put the cup on the table and gave me a slice of cranberry cake.

"But I didn't ask for..." I started to say.

"Chut! It's on me! And I made plenty to go around" she interrupted, "Here's a paper. It'll be a while till I can get off, hon." Ah, sweet Birna and her town-famous cakes.

"You're the best," I grinned. She lifted my mood a little higher and let me think a little better.

Several minutes later, Birna came to sit down at the table. She put her hand on my forehead.

"What are you doing?" I asked and she took her hand off me.

"Seeing if there's any fever. Krist also told me on the cell that Alex has got the flu, so I had to make sure you don't have any and I don't need you to be infecting the whole coffeeshop today," she smiled, "But something tells me that there is something else that is bothering you."

"Well, heh. I can't fool your inner intuition, so you're right," I sighed, "But I won't tell you exactly. How can I put it ...? Well, let's say a friend, not one of my closest ones, discovered a disturbing secret that you don't want anyone to know now. I reacted by leaving the spot where this 'friend' told me that he or she knows about it now," I fumbled as I tried to explain it to her. I'm such a poor explainer.

"Well, did the 'friend' appear disturbed at all? Was he...or she...calm about it? Have you observed the body language and everything? Perhaps the secret may sound disturbing to you, but it might not be for your 'friend.' It could be rather a subjective view to call it disturbing," she said. In fact, as I thought about it now, Cecile was calm all along and didn't have much of a chance to explain the whole story. But no, I'll still assume the worse just to be on the safe side. I need Ben to sort this out for me because I'm too tired to think right.

"You probably got it right, Birna. Thanks. Maybe I should be in school now instead of being emo and sick?" I gave her a small smile.

"Oh no, you're not. Look at this weather!" she pointed out of the window, where I saw that it was still snowing heavily, "It's just a snow squall. It'll go away soon. I heard it on the radio few minutes ago."

"Erm, Birna..." I pointed to the bubbles coming out of the dishwasher behind the counter, "Something is wrong."

"Oh shit..." she jumped out of her seat and ran to the machine. I followed her to see if she needed any help. She shut off the machine but the bubbles continued to flow out.

"I forgot to seal it shut," she said, "But it won't stop bubbling." She stepped in the puddle on the floor and nearly slipped on her ass, ending up with some water all over her jeans. All of the customers in the shop had no trouble hearing her swearing, and fortunely she swore only in Icelandic so no one understood the unholy words coming out of her mouth. I knew it, Krist got his badmouth from his mother. I couldn't resist giggling and pulled Birna up. She was looking a little annoyed and gave the machine a little kick. It stopped bubbling at last.

"Well, that would've been a nice little scene in a drama movie," she started to giggle lightly, now a little amused, "Could you be a dear and help me clean up this mess? That is if we want to go home on time. Go get me the mop," she smiled as she used a cleaning cloth to wipe the soap bubbles off her jeans.

The girl came to run the shop for Birna, so we went to her car and drove to school to pick up the rest of the guys. 309 was a little messy with snow and Birna had to use caution and go a little slower than usual.

We arrived at school and found Krist, Jake, and Ben waiting for us, and all of them got in.

"What happened?" Krist asked while Ben watched me for my reply.

"Feeling a little not too well. I hope that it's not the same flu that Alex has now. If I got it, you all might get it as well but it hasn't shown up yet." Krist started to look a little concerned because he absolutely hates getting the cold or the flu.

We arrived at the lake a little later than usual because the country roads were a worse mess than 309. Birna dropped off Jake first before heading to Ben's house. Ben thanked Birna for the ride, and waved good-bye and went in the house. Not too long after, he ran out of the house to the car, appearing to have forgotten something.

"Steph and Krist, wanna stay for dinner? M'man's inviting you," he asked all excited.

"No, sorry, no can do, Krist. Remember, you have a dentist appointment in an hour," Birna reminded Krist, who sighed with disappointment, "Sorry guys," he said.

I got out of the car and went in the house, only to be greeted by Mathieu.

"Steph! Chu heureux que tu sois enfin là!" (Steph, I'm glad you're finally here!) he said all smiles.

"Huh? I'm lost," I said confusedly.

"Errr...I'm happy that you're..." he struggled to find some last words.

"He's just happy to see you again," Ben finished for him, "He's only 12, and he hasn't gotten many English courses yet," he explained,
"You're..." he continued to find words.

"Matt, tu peux arrêter d'essayer de traduire. J'y ai déjà dit," (Matt, you can stop trying to translate. I already told him.) he told Matt.

"I'm happy that you're finally here!" he completed, giving me a big grin. Mrs. Lemoureaux came out of the kitchen and smiled when she saw me.

"Allô, Steph!" Mrs. Lemoureaux warmly said to me.

"Hi, Mrs..."

"Ah ah ah, en français!" she waved her finger.

"Bonjour, Mme Lemoureaux!"

"Excellent! Ça va?" she continued.

"Euh, bien...bien..." I paused to think, pulling out phrases I had learned from French class, "et vous?" I finished off more slowly.

"Aussi bien, mais tu n'as pas besoin de me vouvoyer parce que je ne suis pas une vieille femme. Dans cette maison, il faut qu'on se tutoie. Est-ce que tu comprends?" she went on and I had no idea what she has said.

"No..."

"There's no need to use 'vous' with me, or you'll just make me feel old. In this house, it's a must that we use 'tu' for everyone," she smiled again as she went to the kitchen to pour some soup into bowls, "C'mon boys, sit down and I'll bring out the soup," she looked at Matt, still a little confused, "Matt, la soupe est prête!" (Matt, the soup is ready!) He got the idea and followed us to the table.

"How can he manage school with limited English skills?" I asked Ben.

"M'man managed to find a French teacher who will help him for the time being with all of his books and teach him English progressively till he is able to take everything in English without the help of French. It should take a little while for him to adapt. He's getting better but he still gets stuck here and there," Ben explained as he slurped his soup a little too loud, which irated his mother.

"Benoît, fais moins de bruit en mangeant ta soupe!" (Benoît, eat your soup more quietly!)

"Beni, y peut-tu rester icitte à soir pour jouer du jeu vidéo avec nous?" (Beni, can he stay here in the evening to play some video game with us?) Matt asked his brother. Matt and Ben look very similar and if they were the same age, I could've confused them for twins. The only difference Matt has from his brother would be his eyes, which are blue, not brown like Ben's.

"Beni?" I said, "You have another nickname?"

"Yes, only be used by my little brother," he stuck his tongue out and turned to face his brother, "Ben oui! On va le kicker fort au cul parce qu'on est le meilleur!" (Of course! We're going to kick him in the ass hard because we're the best!) he winked at Matt. Ok, I have no idea what he just said but whatever. So I went back to eating my soup.

"You're going to...erm...play some video games with moi...erm no...with me this evening?" he said in thick accent, all innocent smiles.

"Sure, I have plenty of time," I rubbed his hair all over his head.

Since Ben and I finished our soup before Matt and Mrs. Lemoureaux did, we excused ourselves to go to Ben's room for a little more...errr...'French lessons.' We walked quickly up to his bedroom, and as always, it was still messy and not unpacked. Ben knew what I was thinking.

"Just shut up about my room and listen to me," he faced me, "Strip to your undies and get on the bed in ten seconds. I'm counting so be quick, or you won't get any love from me and you'll actually get French lessons for real," he threatened, "Well...go! Ten...nine..." he started to count. I wasted no time getting all of my clothes off...

Ben stopped counting at...one-quarter of the second and was about to say one-eighth, apparently not serious about his threat. He smirked with glee and hunger at my body. He used his eyes to observe every inch of me.

I sighed and said, "I'm right here...no need to rape me with your eyes. It's so pointless," I grinned, "Your turn."

"No...my room, my rules," he declared like an army general, and pressed his chest against mine and slowly started to kiss my neck. As the seconds go by, the more intense he is in kissing all over my neck and one little spot that I found most pleasurable. He used his teeth a little and nipped me few times.

"Hey, lay off the teeth. Your lips are perfect," I whispered to him. He ceased using his teeth and went down to kiss my chest, and went for my nipple to give it a huge licking session. I was already bone hard and now he put me in pleasure land with nipple licking. He pushed me to his bed and we just kissed, again. Then someone knocked on the door.

"Ben! C'est quoi que tu fais là? Tu m'as promis qu'on va jouer du jeu vidéo." (Ben! What you're doing there? You promised me that we'd play some video game.) Matt asked behind the door.

Ben swore under his breath, "Matt, j'ai rien promis. Crisse-nous la paix! On étudie! On jouera à plus tard!" (Matt, I promised nothing. Leave us alone, dammit! We're studying here! We'll play later.) Ben shouted at the door.

When it appeared that he was obviously gone, Ben smiled and said, "Good thing I locked the door. He should be gone for a bit." And then he went back to where he was before we stopped. Then several seconds later, Matt knocked on the door again. Ben sighed and rolled his eyes.

"I guess not for a bit! Matt, chsé où M'man a caché les biscuits." (Matt, I know where M'man hid the cookies.) he muttered in frustration. After few seconds of silence.

"Y sont où?" (Where are they?) he asked in a polite voice.

"Y sont dans le placard au-dessus des assiettes." (They're in the cupboard over the plates.) he responded, and we heard footsteps walking away from the door.

"That should keep him away from us for quite a while. The cookie bag is full, so he'll be eating all of them," he smiled, "Now where were we? Ah yes! I must strip for you," he said lustily. He leaned up, but was still sitting on me right on my hips. He slowly took his shirt off while giving my hard on some rubbing. In a few moments, he was all naked but for his undies. He slowly took off mine and he let me slowly take off his, freeing our aching cocks from their tight cotton prisons.

Ben grinned at my boner and moved closer to it before saying, "He needs some attention. Let's dance!" and dove down taking it in his mouth for a wonderful-sucking treatment.

"Ahhhh....hmmm" I sighed slowly, enjoying all of the sudden waves of emotions and pleasure spreading all over my body. That's my boy...my only boy...my boyfriend.