Cyclic Poems, Set B, "Pulsar" - 3. Neo's Gay Boyfriend

Saturday night, Oh My God, He is not back

yet and it’s almost three. He is probably

still with that Neo guy that drops him off. I’ll leave

my door slightly open so I can sense when…

…Sunday at noon.

-- Corbi, we’re back from church, kids are fed. Can you get up? You’ll need to take care of them.

-- Okay Marie, keep my door open.

--Okay, bye.

--Bye.

Half an hour later Gabie walks in… it felt like a second later…

-- Can you wake up and play with me? Mom said you would be taking care of me and us after church when they went to the grocery store.

They exchange graces and she leaves through the frame.

I need to get up and take care of the kids

She has been a good mother to me also

I was thirteen when Uriel was born, Let’s see

About nine when Marie married dad, good time

Sad time for both of us when mom suddenly …

I’ll shower when parents return from the store

Why do I allow Asie to do this to…

Need distraction, clean yard a little today

Little sister out of the room and in his

Need to dress, cold outside, need to cover briefs

…I allow Asie to do this to me, why?

Naa naa naaaa naa naa naaaa naa naa naaa naa hmmm…

Nothing obvious on the floor I wanted more

Saint Cudahy is a few days away hmmm…

Good excuse to… where are my green and grey Fallen[1]?

Drop by and say “Hi!” and blame it on the day

Across the house Uriel walks into the kitchen from the outside with the “borrowed” camera in hand and Rafael in tow.

-- Can I see the wepo’t again?

--Yea but allow me to touch the buttons myself, thank you very much.

Rafael had moved a kitchen chair aside as Uriel fumbled the “borrowed" camera.

-- Wee’re back in people! ! !

-- We back in!

Next day is a Monday Morning, a school day. Rafael follows his older brother. The younger is half the older. He is half the size. He is half the height. He is half the age. Monday morning blues. Both walk to school. Fairview Elementary is their destination, eastbound, away from 69^thstreet.

-- Don’t forget to eat your snack today.

-- Okay.

-- Don’t cross before me. We cross together.

You always tell me the same thing ova’ and ova’ and ova’.

-- I know!

Kid, he doesn’t respect his elder.

Eldest grabs gently the younger’s shirt, they cross the avenue with not much fuss. Marie returns back into the house, content that both are safely on their way to school. Corbi,Corbulo, caches most of these sights from his room’s south facing window. He’s getting ready for his drive to downtown Milwaukee. Asie, now sleeping north, in his own room, is in Corbi’s mind.

This will never work, he is my stepmother’s

brother’s son, Augustus’ son. I remember

the afternoon I went with mom to Michelle

International Airport to pick up her

nephew. November, Tuesday before Thanks’ of

last year. He looked so sad. Blue boy, gay,

just like me. Twenty two, I think he said, one

year younger than me… Neo is his nick name, I

think that is what Marie told dad, ‘his

friend’s name was Nero Nadir.’ Dang it! I can’t

I need to stop this thinking….

GO forward lad

AND seek that one

YOLK that satisfies

BAD desires

OVERT yearnings

YOU sense a need for

Asie leaves home through the kitchen door and decides to travel north on foot via 69^thstreet. It is his second day off from work at a bar from afar. Today Monday he will not be going to the bar strip on Packard avenue in the city of Cudahy. So, he will not be seeing his love Neo, Nero Nadir. Last night was spent at home. He had played with his cousins, three, and talked with their father Michael, Mike for short. Aunt went to work in the evening so they all had an early dinner. Mike widowed once, had a son, Corbulo. Son spent the late afternoon doing yard work. He too had Sunday off. Asie continues walking.

Outside endlessly seeking

Memories of Saturday’s

Good night of…

Not the same Patrick

but a saint any way

Born on Saint Patrick’s

day don’t remember

date Died 1919

Repeating number

They’re Always easy

to remember that way

At the end of Lay

ton avenue the

statue’s plaque read

Irish, Cudahy, just

like that St.Patrick

guy, Founded the city.

Sold meat too. Neo took

me to that park near

the bar before I

started working on

a Saturday in Dec

ember Nobody

there cold very cold He kept me warm The lake

was aggressive It looked like an ocean

I opened his jacket He didn’t care

I took mine off partially just the right

sleeve put my right arm under his open

jacket and pressed my hand on his spine I

wanted to make him mine arm back I could feel

his heart’s pulsar. It began to get dark

That was first date for me but not for Neo

He had he me confused three plus a trick

Abused not four nitch less