Christmas in Zonei - 18. Home, Sweet Home

Raeden felt terror ripple through Kim and it pulled him quickly out of lust-fugue. His senses automatically went on high alert, trying to detect the cause of his mate’s fear, even as he stopped his hip movements and pulled out of the kiss. Sensing no immediate danger, he kept his face close to Kim’s, panting into his delicate ear as he tried to beat down his raging libido.

Kim’s fear eased a notch, although his anxiety level was still through the roof. That’s when it hit Raeden that Kim was afraid of him. With that realization came a deluge of hurt. Raeden knew that, prior to meeting him, Kim’s only sexual experiences had been terrifying and painful; it was perfectly natural for him to be afraid. But Raeden couldn’t help his emotions. He was crushed that Kim didn’t trust him.

He doesn’t know you well. You’ve only been together six weeks. Lyzel and you had spent most of your lives together before you even started having sex. This is all new for Kim and he doesn’t trust easily.

In spite of his internal pep talk, he was flooded with a deep sense of loss. He had lost the close bond that he’d had with Lyzel. It felt as if a critical part of him—an arm or a leg or an eye—had been cut off. He wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to reach the same level of intimacy with Kim. He closed his eyes against the burning that signaled oncoming tears as gut-wrenching pain tore through his heart. He heard Kim gasp and, realizing that his new mate was feeling his emotions, he tried to focus on Kim instead of himself.

He licked slowly along the shell of Kim’s ear, taking in his comforting scent, slowing his breathing and his heart rate. Kim stroked the side of his face, his anxiety now almost completely replaced by concern. He cares deeply for me. That thought eased his hurt and sorrow more than his mind’s monologue had.

He pulled away enough to look Kim in the eye. The beautiful dark eyes met his, full of worry for him and guilt.

He feels guilty for not wanting sex with me? Raeden didn’t know how to fix that. He had already told Kim he wouldn’t hurt him, but words didn’t seem to be enough. He would have to convince him with his actions. He would take it slowly, seduce Kim gently—even if it was a year before they had intercourse, he wouldn’t take him when he was afraid. His libido whimpered pitifully at that thought.

It’s Christmas Eve. We shouldn’t have all this angst. So rather than bringing up and talking about their feelings, Raeden danced around the subject.

“I’m sorry I attacked you, Kim.” He forced a grin. “You smell so damn good and … it’s been a very long time for me.”

Kim smiled at him sweetly and ran his finger across Raeden’s lips. “I can’t imagine I could possibly smell good at this point. I really need a bath.”

“Or a shower,” Raeden said. “I’m sure there’s a shower here somewhere.”

As if suddenly realizing where they were, Kim looked around and his jaw dropped open. He sat up abruptly, his head swiveling back and forth to take everything in.

The apartment was definitely impressive even by Raeden’s standards. The main room was large enough for three distinct areas: kitchen, dining, and living. Two walls of the great room were taken up by windows, and a glass door opened onto a sizable balcony that wrapped around the corner. On the fifty-sixth floor, they were higher than most of the buildings around them and the night cityscape view was spectacular.

The apartment was furnished with a white fabric couch and chairs, and matching glass and steel coffee and end tables that Raeden didn’t really care for. They looked fine, but would be difficult to keep clean; he much preferred faux leather and real wood. And the décor—a few paintings on the walls, lamps, assorted knick-knacks, and rugs—while tasteful, was non-descript. “We can get our own furniture. This is all probably rental stuff,” he said.

Kim, still agog, taking it all in, did not reply.

The bones of the apartment were beautiful. The floor looked like a grey stone of some sort, polished and veined with white. There was a white brick fireplace along one wall. The kitchen countertops were pale gray, made of some modern material, the appliances shiny black and state-of-the-art. The fixtures were modern and sleek, and all the basics appeared to be there: coffee maker, microwave, toaster, dishtowels and so on. Raeden was sure the cupboards held dishes and pots and pans.

The dinning room table seated six but Raeden observed that there was room for a much larger table. The center was graced with a large vase of fresh flowers in Christmas reds and whites. Reluctant to leave Kim’s side but curious about the tag hanging off of the flowers, Raeden stepped over to read it.

“CorpSci sent us flowers and wishes us Merry Christmas—probably Michelle’s doing.” A full-sized, real-pine Christmas tree had been set up in the corner where the window walls met and Raeden noticed there were a few wrapped packages under it. Now he wandered over and checked these out too.

“They’re from Randy and Michelle,” he said. “That’s awfully sweet of them. I wonder when they had time to do all this. Michelle probably had Randy running around all day. We’ll have to do something nice for them in return. Randy probably expected to have the day off and Michelle came back from her vacation to rescue us.”

“Wow! I can’t believe this is all ours!” Kim said. His voice held a hushed awe that reflected the expression on his face.

“All ours, Little One, except…” Raeden frowned as he glanced around. Surely they wouldn’t have … but of course they did. He looked at Kim. “Do you mind if I switch to lizard form for a few minutes? I want to clean the bugs out of this place. It’ll be in our contract that they can’t do that, but we haven’t actually signed a contract yet and I wouldn’t put it past them to try.”

“Bugs?” Kim echoed, and then his eyes widened. “Oh, you think they’re spying on us?” A visible shudder ran through him. “No, I don’t mind—please do. But why lizard form?”

“I’ll be able to smell whatever electronics they might have hidden here, no matter how tiny or discreet. It’ll only take a minute.”

Kim, still sitting on the kitchen counter, nodded. “Okay.”

Raeden lost no time in slipping off his clothes, shifting to lizard form, and rampaging through the unit. By the time he was done, his anger was barely in check. He shifted quickly back to human form, where he had better control.

“Fucking goons!” he grumbled as he dumped the last of the of electronics onto the pile that he’d made on the kitchen counter next to Kim, who had stayed put and watched him with wide eyes. “I can’t believe they thought they could get away with this. Fucking pervs even had cameras set up in the bedrooms and bathrooms.”

He looked around, opening cupboards and drawers until he found a box of plastic garbage bags. Sweeping the pile of expensive electronics into the bag, he went to the disposal unit built under the kitchen counter, pressed the button for recycle, and dropped the bag inside. With a swish it was swept away to the recycling center somewhere in the depths of the high rise.

Kim’s eyes were wide. “You won’t get in trouble for removing those?”

Raeden let out a low growl. “I will not live with someone spying on me in my own home. If they don’t like it, they can kiss my ass. I’m sure regular citizens end up with hidden bugs or whatnot in their units, but none of the mods will put up with it. Most of us can detect them easily.”

He slid his arms around Kim and kissed his forehead. “The shower in the master bath is big enough for two.” He couldn’t help waggling his eyebrows.

Fortunately Kim’s reaction was to let out a small laugh. So he’s not afraid of the idea of being intimate with me, Raeden guessed. He’s just afraid of the act itself. I can work with that.

Kim pulled slightly away and glanced down at Raeden’s cock, which was half hard, lying gently against his thigh. “Umm … you don’t have a cock when you’re in lizard form?”

Raeden laughed. “Yes, I do. But most of the time they are retracted, like a lizard’s. Unlike a lizard, I actually have control over when they emerge.”

Kim’s eyebrows flew up. “They?”

“When I’m in lizard form, I have hemipenes. I can show you sometime if you’re curious. They are rather … bizarre-looking.”

Raeden didn’t know if Kim knew what hemipenes were but he obviously got the concept. His emotions were an odd mix of curiosity and trepidation.

“Did you … did you and Lyzel ever make love in lizard form?” Kim asked. Raeden could sense another strong emotion, but couldn’t quite identify what it was.

“We tried it, of course. I wouldn’t call it making love, though. For lizards, it really is just fucking. We do retain some of our human mind while in lizard form, but unfortunately, lizards don’t really enjoy sex. It’s just an instinctual act for them. So we only tried it once—it really wasn’t fun—not the way it should be.”

“Oh,” Kim said. Raeden sensed his relief. He’s comparing himself with Lyzel and worried that he won’t measure up.

“Don’t worry, Little One. You have everything I need and more.” He smiled into Kim’s eyes and was relieved when Kim’s worry eased. Needing to be close to his mate, he nuzzled Kim’s cheek. This led to kissing down his lovely long neck. When he got to the hollow of his collarbone, his fingers sought the buttons on Kim’s shirt. He took his time, undoing them one by one and tasting the luscious skin on his mate’s chest as he went. The young man shivered under his touch.

When he finished with the last button he straightened and slid the shirt off of Kim’s shoulders. “I’m naked. It’s only fair that you get naked too,” he teased. Kim smiled at him shyly and Raeden feasted on the sight of his slender, toned arms and torso. He didn’t have a classic six-pack but his narrow hips seemed to V toward his groin, enticing Raeden to want see what his slacks were hiding. His smooth skin was lovely and pale, his nipples rosy temptations, stiff and erect.

Raeden ran a light hand down Kim’s chest, loving how the younger man’s skin pebbled with goose bumps from his touch. He circled an areola and Kim’s head dropped back, his full lips parting with a low gasp. Raeden gently brushed the nub with his thumb and Kim pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, biting.

How can I resist such a responsive lover?

Rubbing his thumb over one hardening point, he bent to lick its twin, pausing to enjoy the slightly herbal scent that wafted from Kim’s skin. “Kim … love,” he murmured in awe, then took the nipple into his mouth, sucking gently.

Kim responded with a loud whimper and a thrust of his narrow hips. Raeden could tell that he was trying not to react, fighting to hold himself still and quiet, but the wave of want that crashed over him swept away his control. Raeden loved making Kim lose control. He continued to suckle one nipple while he pinched the other gently. As all of Kim’s defenses broke down, the tiny man began humping into Raeden’s stomach, his legs wrapping around his torso, and his mouth letting out a string of piteous moans and whimpers.

The heat of desire swept through Raeden’s body like a tsunami, urged on by his lover’s impassioned cries. His cock rose to full stiffness, butting up against Kim’s ass cheek. As Kim rocked his hips, rubbing his balls and the base of this cock wantonly against Raeden’s taut stomach, the big mod’s cock was treated to the resulting friction of Kim’s still-clothed butt moving against the head of his cock. Precum spewed forth, making a sticky trail across Kim’s slacks.

As wild as Raeden was with desire, he was still conscious of his lover’s fragility. He didn’t want to scare Kim again, so he took things down a notch, kissing up Kim’s chest to suck at the hollow of his throat again, while the hand that had been teasing the younger man’s nipple slid around to rub the small of his back in a gentle rhythm.

Kim let out a long low groan. Raeden smiled into his neck as he heard the other man panting, obviously fighting for control.

“Oh my God, Raeden,” Kim said with a gasping breath. “I … I had no idea my nipples were so … fuck!”

“Erogenous?” Raeden suggested, pulling away enough to look at his lover. Kim’s eyelids were heavy with lust, his eyes black as black, his pupils blown with lust. His skin was flushed and dewy with desire. Raeden almost groaned aloud as he fought to keep himself from pushing for more. He had never seen Kim looking so sexy.

“Shall we check out the shower?” he asked, his voice rough with need. How on earth am I going to restrain myself?

Kim nodded dreamily, as if not quite awake.

Raeden swept him off the counter into his arms and whisked him down the short hallway and into the master bedroom where he set him down gently. This room was also furnished and decorated with mostly standard furnishings. One full wall was taken up with windows and there was a small balcony off of it as well.

Kim stared at the bed. “It’s huge!”

Raeden grinned. “It’s mod-sized.”

“My little unit must have seemed so dingy to you.”

Raeden slid his arms around the small man’s chest, pulling him gently back against him. He kissed the top of Kim’s head. “You had everything you really needed, and I was in no condition to even notice.” He chuckled ruefully. “The only thing that drove me crazy was the lack of drugs, alcohol, and meat. I’m sorry I was such an ass when we first met.”

“You really were,” Kim agreed.

“Hey!” Raeden protested, running his fingers down to Kim’s taut stomach, tickling.

Kim squealed and tried to squirm away. Raeden boxed him in with his arms, still tickling lightly. Kim retaliated in kind and they both dissolved into fits of laughter, eventually ending up tangled together on the bed, breathless.

With Kim on top of him, squirming and laughing, Raeden’s cock immediately took notice. Raeden’s laugh was replaced by small groan as he wrapped his hand in Kim’s hair and pulled the other man’s face close for a scorching kiss. His whole body was instantly on fire as white-hot need coursed through his veins. He could sense Kim’s emotions. There was a small bit of anxiety there, but the younger man was burning with lust as well.

Determined to take things slowly, Raeden pulled out the kiss before he began humping into Kim. He gazed into Kim’s lust-heavy eyes, admiring the planes of his face and his plump, kissable lips. Reaching up, he tugged the tie out of Kim’s hair and combed through the plait with his fingers until the ink-black hair spilled over Kim’s shoulders and teased Raeden’s chest.

“You’re the prettiest man I’ve ever seen,” he whispered.

Kim looked startled and maybe even a bit confused, but Raeden felt the other man’s pleasure at his words. A gorgeous blush spread across Kim’s face. He opened his mouth to say something, but Raeden put a finger on his lips.

“Don’t deny it. Just accept it.” He moved his finger so he could capture the perfect lips again in another heavenly kiss. Kim’s hair fell about them like a black silk curtain, sheltering them from the outside world, from the painful past and from the uncertain future. There was only this place and this time and the sweetest, smartest, most beautiful man in the world in his arms. Raeden sighed blissfully into Kim’s mouth.

*****

Kim felt like he was dreaming. Things like this did not happen to him. He would surely wake up soon, alone in his old unit in Zonei. Meanwhile, he should enjoy the dream, because the most gorgeous man he’d ever seen was naked, lying partially on top of him, and gazing at him with undisguised lust.

“Shall we go check out the shower?” Raeden asked.

Kim shifted to sit up. “Yes, I definitely need a shower … yesterday.”

Raeden stood up, a seven-foot tall god of perfection. He held out his hand for Kim and helped him out of bed. How can someone so big and fierce be so gentle? Kim wondered. As Raeden led the way into the bathroom, Kim’s eyes were drawn to the twin globes of his ass, which looked soft and hard at the same time. His hand seemed to have a mind of its own and it reached out to touch, to feel whether that enticing butt was as firm as it looked. It was warm and pliant under Kim’s hand and he couldn’t help but squeeze it, reveling in the feel of those massive muscles.

Raeden grinned at him as they entered the bathroom. “You’re a butt-man?”

“Most definitely,” Kim replied and then caught sight of Raeden’s thick cock. It wasn’t fully hard, but it was rapidly getting there. Unlike Kim, Raeden was cut, showing off a ruddy mushroom tip. Prominent veins ran down the front of his cock, leading the way to a set of heavy balls. His cock unfurled to stand proud, leaning slightly to the left. Once again, Kim’s hands seemed to have a mind of their own. He reached out and grabbed the obelisk, wrapping his fingers around the hot shaft and realizing that his hand was barely big enough to go halfway around it.

The thread of unease this caused was derailed by the sound that Raeden made. Kim looked up at him and was enraptured by his face. His eyes were at half-mast, his lips parted, and the sound of pure need that came from his mouth flipped Kim’s insides over.

“Kim…” Raeden groaned. He looked like he wanted to say more, but he swallowed instead. Kim watched his Adam’s apple bob as he drew his hand slowly up Raeden’s fat cock.

“Uunnhhg!” Raeden said.

Kim glanced down at the huge member in his hand and saw precum pooling at the slit. He slid his hand up and ran his thumb over the tip, rubbing the warm viscous liquid around the head. Raeden let out another primal sound.

“Kim!” Raeden cried out. “I … stop!” Kim had started moving his hand rhythmically up and down Raeden’s shaft, and now he stilled, looking up at the big man, wondering if he’d done something wrong.

“I’m gonna…” Raeden panted a few times and took a deep breath, pulling himself together. “It’s been so long … I almost came. I don’t want to come quite so quickly.”

“Oh,” Kim said, a smile pulling at his lips. He pulled his hand away from Raeden’s cock and licked the precum off of his thumb. It was salty and bitter and oh so delicious.

Raeden let out another low groan as he watched Kim. “Oh my God! You are so hot!”

Kim felt warmth creep into his cheeks. Biting back the protest that came to his lips, he smiled affectionately up at the big mod. At that moment, he realized that his pants were uncomfortably tight. Feeling self-conscious of his tiny thin body next to Raeden’s huge muscle-bound one, he nevertheless toed off his shoes. Pulling off his dirty socks, he tossed them aside and then noticed that the stone floor was warm under his feet.

For the first time, he looked around at the bathroom. It was huge—almost as big as his main room at the Shangri La. There was a Jacuzzi tub in the corner that could easily hold four—well maybe only two if they were Raeden’s size. The glass-enclosed shower was like a room of its own, with multiple showerheads, a hand-held sprayer, and a control panel that looked complex enough to run a small ship.

The floor was white stone and the tub looked like it was made out of black granite, polished and flecked with gray. The floor of the shower was out of the same material. Along one wall was a long black counter with two deep sinks in teal porcelain. The toilet was also teal. Sets of fluffy teal and black towels were neatly stacked on a shelf above the toilet and there were teal bath mats in front of the shower and tub.

“Wow!” Kim said. He felt too overwhelmed with the space and the fixtures to come up with anything more intelligent to say.

Raeden chuckled low. “It is nice, isn’t it?”

“The floor is warm.”

“Yep.” Raeden’s grin became predatory and he reached for Kim, sliding an arm around his waist as the other went to the snap on his slacks and undid it with practiced ease. His voice was deep and husky when he said, “These need to come off.” He tore open the tab closure, a twenty-second century invention that had all but replaced zippers, and slid his long fingers inside.

Kim’s cock jumped eagerly toward Raeden’s fingers, which stroked up and down it, outside his cotton briefs. The touch was exquisite, sending waves of pleasure through Kim’s body. Raeden’s thumb found and circled the head, causing fresh spurts of precum to further drench Kim’s already soiled briefs.

Kim found himself panting. He felt dizzy. Suddenly he needed his slacks off! He grabbed the waistband and yanked both his pants and his briefs down to his knees in one quick move. His cock bobbed out in greeting, a fleck of precum flying off of it.

Raeden took a step back and stared at him. Kim didn’t look at Raeden as he self-consciously stepped out of his clothes. Once he was standing there naked next to the giant, he felt his face flushing again in embarrassment. He looked at the floor, hoping that his long fall of hair would hide his reddening cheeks.

“Kim…” Raeden said softly as he reached out and, putting his fingers under Kim’s chin, tilted his face up. Kim looked into Raeden’s wide blue eyes which were smiling at him with affection. Kim’s discomfort faded as he felt the very real emotion of love radiating from Raeden. The big mod’s gaze slid away from his eyes to peruse down his chest and torso, pausing to take a long look at his groin. Kim thought he should have felt self-conscious again, except the expression on Raeden’s face and the emotions he was emanating were pure appreciation and desire.

“You are exquisite,” Raeden said.

Still not comfortable with praise and with the intensity of Raeden’s gaze, Kim stepped past him into the shower. “And dirty,” he said. He paused in front of the panel.

Raeden stepped up behind him and pointed out buttons, each of which had a unique icon on it. “This one turns the left showerhead on.” He demonstrated and cool water began to pour out of the fixture, splashing on Kim’s lower leg. “This controls the positioning of the nozzle. This sets the temperature—press this to switch the temperature setting between the two showerheads and the sprayer. How warm do you like it?” Raeden pressed the up arrow and the digital readout began to climb even as Kim felt the water on his leg grow warmer.

“I don’t know. I’ve never taken a warm shower before.”

“Never—?” Raeden looked at him aghast.

Kim shrugged. “We didn’t have hot water at the Shangri La and I’ve never showered anywhere else.”

“Oh…” Raeden ruminated on this for a second. “You took cold showers?”

“Only when it really hot outside—once or twice a year maybe. Otherwise it was always baths, which were usually lukewarm because of the expense and time involved in heating up teakettles full of water.”

“I’ve always appreciated a warm shower, but I never realized what a luxury it was,” Raeden said.

“Yeah, probably most of the population doesn’t get to take hot showers.”

“You’re right.” Raeden’s brows had furrowed into a frown and Kim felt his dark thoughts.

“But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to enjoy taking one right now,” Kim said, stepping under the spray and groaning with pleasure as the hot water hit his skin. “Wow!” His mind immediately seemed to slip into a dreamlike state. “Better than I imagined.” Kim closed his eyes.

He heard Raeden chuckle. “I’m going to go put the food away—I left it lying on the floor by the front door—and then I’ll be back to join you. Enjoy yourself.”

“Oh, I will,” Kim said with a smile. He still hadn’t opened his eyes so was startled when Raeden’s big hand slid behind him, pulling him close to his massive body. One of Raeden’s hands went to his butt and squeezed; his other went to his hair and pulled, not hard enough to hurt but hard enough for Kim’s face to snap up. His lips were taken in a fierce kiss, with a hot tongue thrusting down his throat in an aggressive, possessive move that almost had Kim swooning.

All too soon Raeden let him go and stepped out of the shower. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

Kim couldn’t wait.