Life of Phoenix - 13. Acceptance

Current Time: Lakota's POV

So mom and dad are out for the weekend. So I guess this would be the best time to inform Lyric of what Theo and I did. I mean, parents aren't home, so they won't find out I'm gay right away as she screams at me. Nor can she take revenge on me by telling them because it's a business trip for them.

Lets put on my big boy pants and start a HUGE conversation.

Lyric was out in the living room on her phone, watching some kind of video. She didn't even notice me as I stood there trying to figure out what I was going to say to her. I just stood there, staring at the wall thinking and thinking. God this is hopeless.

“Lyric...” I spoke with no more than a whisper. She didn't even hear me. “Lyric,” I spoke at a normal level that time.

She looked up at me. “You need to see this; it's seriously hilarious.” Lyric pointed her phone screen towards me. I just ignored it.

I took a deep breath and then just said it. “Lyric I'm gay.”

Barely batting an eye she returned the phone to its original position. “Ya, and? Oliver already told me about it.” Wait what!? I can't say much, though; it feels like I cheated on him so. “Tell me something I don't know Lakota.”

“Okay.” Well, I can tell her something she doesn't know so, why not. “I can do that.”

She rolled her eyes. “What? That you and Oliver have kissed? Meh, unless it's sex I have no interest in it.” I said nothing in reply. “Wait, little brother isn't a virgin anymore!? Did Oliver take it from you?”

I shook my head. “No... Theo did...” I spoke loud enough for me to be heard but be ashamed of myself. Lyric's face went from being friendly to being completely serious in milliseconds.

She stood up and marched over to me as fast as she could. “Excuse me, what did you say?” I backed away, preparing for a strike to the face. Nothing came, though.

When I opened one of my eyes, she remained close, but hands were on her sides. “Theo... took it.” Then it came a slap right across the face. The sound of it echoed through the house. “Ow! That hurt!”

“What the fuck happened Lakota? When? Where?”

The amount of saliva I'm creating can go away anytime now. There's no way I could keep eye contact with her right now. “It started with him being at the house before you... he wanted me to blow him.”

“And did you?” I nodded and got slapped again. “Continue. Now.”

It hurt, on a physical and emotional level. I knew I had betrayed my sister and hurt her. She was getting back at me by slapping me right now, who knows where this is going to go the farther the story goes.

“He said he wasn't getting anything from you and thought he could get it from me. We didn't do anything for a while until the other day when he came and picked me up, and Oliver was here when we arrived.” I prepared for another slap, but it did not occur. “When he picked me up, he said you were... on your period, and, therefore, he hadn't gotten any. I was horny and when he asked... I didn't say no.” That got me a slap across the face.

“Where the fuck did he fuck you, Lakota!? In the car?” I nodded. She screamed but didn't hit me. “Seriously!? Right before Prom? Who the fuck am I going to go with now? And you! Seriously, you let this happen?”

Tears were falling in full force now. I hated knowing that I was the cause of this hurt she felt, this anger. “I'm sorry, he wanted it, and I was too horny for my own good. I regretted it afterward, and that's why I'm telling you.”

She rolled her eyes. “Quit your crying, you baby. Waterworks aren't going to fucking save you now. What happens when I tell Oliver this?”

“I already have... He got mad at me too.” I tried to wipe away the tears. “I didn't want to hurt you Lyric; I seriously mean that.” I sniffled as she rolled her eyes and stomped away. The next thing I heard was the front door slamming and then silence.

My emotions overwhelmed me and tears formed again. What have I done? My sister is going to hate me for life now! I mean there have been times where we haven't gotten along but never like this. Nothing we've ever done was this bad, and it was all on me.

I wish I could take it all back.

Nix's POV

Lyric just came storming into my house and dragged me out into the backyard. Mom and dad were just as confused as I was when she pulled me out back. When she started talking, I was kind of stunned. There was always this feeling about Lakota, but Theo? REALLY?

She must have kicked the tree like a dozen times before she realized it hurts to kick trees. “Seriously why do trees have to be so hard?” Lyric went to punch the tree but stopped before she did. “Why am I so angry!?”

“Because you're hurting. Now sit down and listen.” Lyric rolled her eyes but sat down nonetheless. “Lakota said he was sorry right?”

“Yes, he did,” she said with a severe attitude. “What does that mean for anything?”

I sighed. “You and I both know you're brother, Lyric. If he said he was sorry, with tears in his eyes, you know he's telling the truth. You know it Lyric!” I have no idea how to get through to her, but I must try.

“That doesn't excuse his actions Phoenix.” She's angry, definitely angry. My first name was used; Lyric doesn't do that very often.

I sat down in front of her. “Just look at this from his point of view Lyric. What happens when you're curious about something and someone dangles in right in front of you? Do you take it?”

She sat there, thinking about what I just said. She stayed like that for a while before she stood up and walked around the tree. “Why are you always right Nix?” I just smiled and leaned back in my glory.

“And what do we do now Lyric?”

She rolled her eyes. “I am not apologizing to my brother, but we are going to fuck with Theo.” Letting out a breath she continued. “Fuck, why did I fall for him?”

I chuckled to myself. “Why did I fall for Keon? Answer: Because he was cute to begin with and had a decent personality.” She nodded in response. “You know he asked me out, again.”

“Why, he knows he has zero to no chance with you, why bother? That kid needs a serious reality check.” She was on her phone texting, someone. When I didn't respond, she looked up at me. “I'm texting my brother, saying I'm over it.”

“Well its close to a sorry, I guess.” She just smiled, shrugged and continued with her texting. “I don't know what's up with Keon but he won't quit. Last time we talked, he wanted to know about prom and shit.”

“Did he ask you to it?” I nodded. Seriously, Keon doesn't understand he's never getting me back. Why won't he just accept it. “I don't know how else to tell him 'no'”

“You never have told me why you won't say yes to him. I just blindly hate him for you.” That’s the best part about Lyric right there. “What happened at that party between you and Keon?” The one and only party that I ever attended.

“Why are we making this about me now?”

She glared down at me. “Because I'm over it, I've gotten as close to an apology that Lakota is going to get. Now we're on you.” The tone in her voice told me she wasn't over it, just accepting that it's a thing. “Now tell me Phoenix.” Oh god, my first name again.

She stepped right over me. “I don't want to talk about it Lyric.”

“Why not?” I couldn't look at her. “It can't be that bad Phoenix. You must be able to talk about it by now. It's been a couple of years since it happened, is it that bad?”

I pulled my knees in close. That night was great to begin with... but it ended on the worst note possible. “I don't remember it exactly... but I woke up naked next to Keon.”

“Wait, like, did you have sex?” I shrugged.

“I don't know Lyric. All I know is we were naked and spooning, me being the little spoon.”

“Well did your ass hurt?” I took off my shoe and chucked it at her face. She dodged of course. “Whoa! Touchy are we?”

“Just shut up and listen to me Lyric.” She took a step back and joined me on the ground. “I told Keon that night that I did not want to sleep with him. That was the night that the school found out I was gay. I wasn't ready for it and honestly, I don't want to know if in fact I did lose my virginity that night.”

She nodded. “I'm sorry, but you feel better now don't you?” I rolled my eyes and nodded.

“We were just about to go home. He handed me a drink and the next thing I remember we were in bed naked with our clothes hanging in the bathroom.” I kicked the dirt in my frustration.

“Wait, that's when you stopped texting me,” I nodded. There were even some texts I don't remember sending to her. “I'm sorry I pushed this out of you.”

“It's fine... you didn't know. It feels better now that I've said it.” Holding onto something’s is like a hand grenade I guess.

“Well, I think we both made progress today, for better or for worse. Want to come over to my house now? I guess I should start planning my revenge against Theo, and I need Lakota's help for that.” I giggled and got up. Well... I guess I got some of it off my chest, but not all of it.

Past Time: Grade 9

“Phoenix, you've got to come to the party!” Keon pestered his boyfriend yet again.

Keon found out and been invited to the 'biggest party of the year' by a friend and was told he could invite anyone he wanted. The only person he wanted to be there though was Phoenix, who had little to no interest in this party.

“You said there would be drinking, right?” Keon nodded. “And I have told you why I don't want to go, correct?”

Keon rolled his eyes. “Yes, but I said you didn't have to drink. I will fend off anyone who tries to make you.” Keon put on his best puppy dog eyes in a last ditch effort to get Nix to give up his resistance.

“Keon, it's not just the drinks. The party scene just isn't for me; my parents wouldn't let me go anyways.” Phoenix walked off. “I've got to get to class; I'll see you later.” Keon smiled as they split and went their separate ways for their classes.

While Phoenix was in the middle of his class, the kids were all talking about the party that night. The more they spoke, the more Nix's curiosity took over. They spoke of plans that people had for the night, and even some 'special plans.'

After class, Nix tried to get the attention of a group of kids. “Hey! Is this party going to be fun?”

The kids laughed at Nix's ignorance. “The party is gonna be amazing! It's going to suck for the host to clean up, though!” Nix felt embarrassed over his question, and somehow he felt morelike wanting to go to the party.

With only five minutes between classes, he went on the lookout for Lyric. Down the hall and turning into the Drama wing and there she was. Lyric was closing her locker and turning almost hitting Nix.

“Oh, Phoenix what's up?” She giggled the awkward close call off.

Nix took a deep breath. “I want to go to the party tonight.” Still embarrassed with himself he looked away from his friend. “Even if 'HE' is going to be there.”

This made Lyric very happy. “YES! Okay, let's go then!”

“Keon wants me to go with him.” Lyric realized the issue her friend was having. “I don't know if both of them could be around me at the same time.”

"Who says they will be?”

Nix shrugged. “I don't know! But what if it happens, Lyric? What would I do?”

Lyric placed her hand on her friend's shoulder. “Max will ignore you like he always does now. I get it, you think you two can become friends again but it won't happen Nix. Don't let him hold you back in life, just do it!”

Phoenix smiled to himself thinking of his friends’ words. “Thanks, Lyric. I should get to class now. I guess I'm going to a party tonight.” They walked down the hall until they had to split to go to their separate classes.

Nix sent Keon a text message saying he would go to the party. Keon was ecstatic about the news and was hardly containable in his class. He was told to be quite by his teacher. He settled down just enough to smile the rest of his class.

Later that night Phoenix stood in front of a full body mirror. Dressed in his nicest pair of jeans and a button-up dress shirt. With skate shoes to finish his look Nix took a glimpse of himself, taking it all in. After a breath, he went out into the living room where his mother was waiting for him. “I'm ready...”

Trisha had a loving motherly smile on her face. “Look at you, you're so handsome.” Nix blushed and tried to move passed his mother. “No, come here and let me take a picture.”

“Mom, can we please just go?”

Ursula popped up from the couch. “NOPE! You've got to get a picture taken.” She stuck her tongue out at her older brother, who kindly returned the favor.

So once Phoenix posed for a picture he was headed out the door. The entire drive to the party was a lecture. 'Don't drink, do drugs or anything you don't want to' was the basis of the lecture. Phoenix assured his mom he had no plan on disobeying her.

Once he was dropped off, he texted Keon that he had arrived. Within minutes, Keon had found him trying to make his way inside. When Nix saw him, though, it made him wish he never came to the party. Keon was already tipsy from alcohol and had another drink in his hands.

“Hey, sweet cheeks.” Keon went in for a hug; Nix backed away. “What's wrong?”

“You're drunk already?” His tone was very serious.

Keon brushed it off as if it was nothing. “I've only had a few beers. Some of the seniors are giving them out, thought I'd try some.”

“I told you I wasn't here to drink.”

Again he brushed it off. “That doesn't mean I can't drink Nix.” He was frustrated at his boyfriend. He was invited to come to a party, and before he even showed up, his boyfriend got drunk. So far for his first house party, he was not impressed.

As time passed by, seniors tried, again and again, to get drinks into his hands. Each time they failed. Nix refused everything he was handed, not wanting to be there but not wanting to leave Keon behind.

Eventually, he decided to text Lyric. Are you here?

Lyric- Mom said I couldn't go, so I'm home being lame. How is it?

Nix- Keon was drunk before I even showed up. I'm bored, and everyone wants me to drink

Lyric- Sounds wonderful. Why don't you just leave?

Nix- I don't want to leave Keon behind.

Lyric- Make him go with you.

Nix- I don't think it'll be that easy. He's happy here.

“HEY!” Keon called out to Nix. “Here drink up.” He handed Nix a drink.

“What is it?” Nix question the drink being handed to him.

Keon rolled his eyes. “It's just 7up, I promise. How do you like the party?”

“I'm bored out of my mind.” His phone went off in his pocket, but he didn't check it. “I want to go home.”

Keon smiled. “Half an hour? And I'll be ready to go, I promise Babe.” Nix instantly glared at his boyfriend. Keon realized his mistake in his drunken state and stumbled. “Sorry... Give me like five minutes and I'll get you out of here.”

“Ok... I'll be here.” Nix took a sip of his drink to test it. It was indeed just 7up in his cup. The next five minutes went by extremely quickly for Nix. With the drink in his hand and Lyric on the other end of the text messages.

Like he promised Keon returned in five minutes ready to go. “Okay, let's get you out of here.”

Nix went to stand up, and that's when it hit him. Nix lost his balance and his vision blurred. Every attempt to get up equaled another fall to the ground. He couldn't focus on anything; he couldn't move. “Keon, what...” He couldn't even complete a sentence.

“It's okay; I got you.” Keon kept him up as they walked through the house. As they moved Nix felt his stomach give in to whatever was in it.

“Keon I'm gonna...” Before he could get more out, barf came out and covered both Nix and Keon. After that, Nix became a rag doll. Not able to do much of anything by himself.

Keon looked around for help. The host of the party eventually came to them. “What's up with him? Too much to drink?”

“No, all he had was a 7up I got for him. Well someone got it for me...” Nix laid on a chair fluttering in and out of consciousness. “Do you have a room that we could use or something?”

Keon went to get Nix up again. “Yeah, you can use my spare room. It's got a bathroom attached to it. Here I'll help you.” Getting him up again and heading towards the room, the host was looking over Nix. “Who gave you the drink?”

“Some senior I think. I don't remember, to be honest.” Once they got Nix into the room, they removed both boys’ soiled shirts. “I'll get this guy all cleaned up. Thanks.”

“No problem. He was probably drugged by the way. Some of the seniors like to do that to kids who aren't drinking. I think it's a dick move. The room has a lock so you can keep him safe.”

“Thanks, man.”

“Anytime.” The guy closed the door and left the two of them alone. Keon locked the door, so there were no disruptions.

Keon took a sniff around the room. Even though they weren't hit, pretty much everything they wore smelled like puke. Thinking it would be better, in the long run, he removed all of his and Nix's clothing before crawling into bed and keeping a watchful eye over his boyfriend until everything seemed okay.

When Nix woke up that morning, he was confused about where he was. An unknown room with Keon beside him, both of them naked. He didn't feel like anything had happened to him sexually but physically it felt like he had been hit by a truck.

There was a knock at the door. “Open up in here!” Without taking much thought into it, he walked over to the door. Having a bit of trouble with the lock, he finally managed to open it. “Oh... Well then.” Clearly the senior gave Nix a once over.

“Oh shit!” It clicked in Nix's head. He hid behind the door just his head popping out. “Hi...” He said nervously.

The older boy laughed it off. “It's fine kid. Who's the lucky lady?” He tried to peep into the room more. Nix closed the door so he couldn't see.

“Sorry! We'll be out as soon as we can.” He quickly shut the door and locked it again. Entering the bathroom, he found his phone close to dead. A few texts from Lyric and his parents were on there. Even a call from his mom's phone.

He quickly replied to his parents explaining he was okay and would be home shortly. I've got to think of a good lie for this! He thought to himself.

As he left the bathroom, Keon was waking up. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Like I have a jackhammer against my head after I've been hit by a car.” He glared at Keon. “What the hell happened!?”

Keon got up and fell back down. “Nope, don't get up Keon...” Having to deal with his own hung over self it took him a minute to reply. “The guy, you know the one who's house we're at...”

“The host, whoever he is.”

“Ya, the host, he said you were probably drugged,” Keon told him as if it was nothing.

Nix did not think it as nothing. “Excuse me!?”

“He said it's something that happens to guys who don't drink. I don't get it either.” Keon sat up on the bed. “Already dressed? How's the shirt?”

“Smelly and wet.” Nix gave a quick annoyed response. “You handed me a drugged up drink?”

“Not like I meant to.”

Nix already physically felt bad, now he was irritated and just wanted to go home. With or without Keon. “You leave me alone for pretty much all night. You were drunk before I even got here, Keon. Then you hand me a drugged drink, and I find myself naked when I wake up!”

Keon put up his hands. “We didn't do anything. And you puked all over us, what was I supposed to do?”

“This has by far been the worst experience of my life, Keon. It actually tops loosing my best friend.” Close to tears, Nix clenched his fists in anger.

“Wait you can't seriously be blaming me for this...” Keon looked up at his boyfriend. “You came here knowing what kind of stuff happens at parties.”

“I didn't fucking expect to be drugged, Keon.”

“I didn't expect to carry your ass all the way to bed, but here we are!” Keon retorted.

“Fuck off.” Nix turned and walked towards the door. Unlocking it, he left it wide open for anyone to walk in on Keon. He quickly made his way through the house to find the exit. When he came around a corner though he bumped into someone. “Sorry, I didn't... Max...”

Looking up he saw Max, with a garbage bag in hand. “Hey... Phoenix.” Very embarrassed with himself Nix tried to move past his old friend as fast as he could.

“Hey! Nix!” Keon came stumbling down the hallway just pulling down his shirt. The guy who knocked on the door earlier gave both Keon and Nix a knowing look before laughing.

Phoenix quickly pushed Max out of the way and ran for the front door. A steady stream of tears flowing down his cheeks. He ran all the way to a patch of trees nearby his house. Nix stayed there until he had calmed down.

Once he did return home, it was straight to his bedroom. His mother asked him to explain himself. Nix didn't care, Ground me. He thought. It will keep me away from Max and Keon for a while.

Chapter End.