Losing the Best of Us - 5. The knot

Chapter 4

 

The knot.

 

Two months had passed since the start of the semester. It came with some benefits. For instance, new things.

New awesome room. Check.

New campus and classes. Check.

New friends.

Friends?

Edited to ‘Platonic lovers’ or ‘crush material’.

Between the tacky remarks, middle fingers raised, silent fights under the dining table and cheeky grins, my relationship with Sean had finally made some progress, as I liked to consider. It had been a week since he finally stopped calling me leprechaun.

Of course not everything was new. I kept my old (young) friend Caroline, who blabbered nonsense about me perving them around which obviously was a half-truth. Come on! Take their handsome faces away and they were simple mortals as everyone else. With a mouth-watering physique and...

Old habits. I kept my old habits. Like sleeping whenever I could.

But definitely not right now.

“Sit down already!” Matty growled at me.

“Sorry, sir. I mean, Matty.”

His laughter filled the room.

“You are such a nervous wreck.”

I stuck out my tongue and sat down quietly before he took drastic measures.

Matty had introduced me to a part time job at the company he worked for. I had been waiting all day for a call. A simple call.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

“Why don’t we drink tea?” Caroline said, trying to calm me down.

“And miss the chance to see his mental breakdown? Hell no!” he mocked.

“Damn you, Matty!” we grumbled and threw cushions at him.

I was about to jump on him, when my phone buzzed.

“Better luck next time,” he grinned.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

***

Walking home with two torso-length bags full of groceries wasn’t my brightest idea; but hey! Someone had to do it right? The dim sunlight peeking through the clouds was a sign that spring was around the corner. A chilly gust made sure to remind me that even so, it was still in winter.

Thank you.

Before my legs gave in, I placed both bags on a nearby bench. I rummaged inside my pocket and took out a biscuit as usual. It wasn’t long until a familiar bark got my attention and after sniffing my shoes, he sat down with both paws at my knee level.

“Good boy,” I smiled as I rewarded him the delicious trait.

I inhaled deeply hoping that my nostrils wouldn’t freeze.

Ahh! The smell of independence was refreshing.

After the little break, I took the grocery bags on each hand and walked back to my new home. As I struggled to push the intercom button, I shivered as the thin suit fabric didn’t help keeping me warm.

“Who is it?” a monotone voice groaned from the other side of the device.

“Lep… Zach. Open the door please? My hands are busy.”

“Did you miss the key?”

“No…”

“Then use it,” a beep indicated that the conversation was over.

On the bright side, it could have been worse .

Once in, I noticed Sean leaning lazily on the couch watching TV. He turned his head and looked at me from head to toes. His expression shifted from surprise to his usual irritable grin.

“You look weird in a suit. This must be my first time seeing a suited leprechaun.” He laughed.

Well, forget the progress. We’re back at square one.

I gave him the middle finger but he was facing the TV already.

“Didn’t you have classes today?” I asked as I put down the grocery bags.

“I skipped.”

How typical.

“Then you should be thinking how we are going to do that inter-faculty project.”

“Hmph. You are the one with the brains. I’m sure you can come up with something faster than I can, am I right? I’m the ‘blockhead’ after all.”

How convenient.

I turned the TV off and sprinted upstairs with the remote.

“Hey!” Sean groaned.

“Deal with it.”

After I finished changing into comfy clothes, I started to fill a few pending documents. I heard a few knocks on my open door.

“I’m not even a little sorry for turning the TV off,” I said concentrated on writing down personal information on a form.

“I didn’t expect you to, but I see why Sean is grumbling.”

I turned around to see the handsome owner of the mesmerizing sea-colored eyes. He leaned on my door with his arms crossed over his chest still chuckling.

My heart raced at the sight.

“Oh Gerard. I thought you were Sean. Need something?”

“Nothing really. I wanted to know how your day went. You seem happy.”

I smiled. Getting a job wasn’t exactly the only thing that made me happy right now.

“My job application was accepted and I passed the interview. I start on Monday,” I replied a bit excited.

“Wow. Congratulations! Is it a good excuse to dine out? Sean could use some fresh air to cool down. He threw me a carrot thinking I was you.”

“Damn! Is the carrot ok?”

“It will survive.”

“And I thought I was the only victim here.”

“His mind has drifted away, far away. Remember our meal three days ago? He forgot to chop the onions for the soup and we ended with half-burnt shrimp skewers.”

“I thought it was a subtle way to tell me he hated me.”

“I’m sure he doesn’t mess with his cooking. It’s his specialty after all.”

“Well, he better clear it up before he ends up burning the whole house.”

“It’s a bit complicated.”

“What is?”

“Uh… nothing. Does Maggie’s sound fine?”

“Sure thing.” I replied, wondering what was going on.

***

If I had been nervous before getting the interview, I was about to collapse now. I didn’t even remember me being this nervous on my first day of school or university. A loud ding!, brought me back to reality as a group of businessmen made their way into the elevator.

“Eighth floor. Analysis department,” a guy with ‘Derek’ on his name tag announced. What a fancy company Matty worked for! They even had an employee for the elevator.

I followed another group of businessmen outside the elevator and stopped on the reception pool. After a few calls, a girl around my age came to where I was waiting.

“You came early,” the girl stated with a hint of annoyance in her voice.

Weren’t I supposed to come early on my first day at work?

“Yes. I’m Zachary,” I introduced myself.

She sighed and replied to a text she had received on her blinding pink phone.

“Follow me.”

We passed a few cubicles, turned left and got inside the coffee room. It had at least 4 coffee machines that made from a simple espresso to a fancy kind of coffee I had never heard of. There was also a long green polished table with matching white tall chairs. My eyes followed her as she prepared her own coffee.

“Is the manager coming here?” I asked feeling a bit disoriented. She looked at me in dismay and rolled her eyes.

“No. But I have to get my coffee first,” she stated as if it was obvious.

“Right,” I lifted my eyebrows.

“So you work with… computer stuff, right? You know the nerdy stuff you study for,” she scoffed.

Are my bullshit senses tingling? Yep.

“Yes, as you don’t seem too bright to do that anyway.”

She choked on her coffee and coughed soundly.

“If you excuse me, I will find the manager myself so you can enjoy the rest of your coffee.”

Adrenaline was rushing through my body as I left the room, satisfied with my response. It probably wasn’t a bright thing to do on the first day. Hell! But I wouldn’t let someone that arrogant to step on me. It was about time I stood up for myself.

I returned to the reception pool and asked for directions to the manager’s office. I made my way there and knocked the door waiting for a response.

“Come in,” a manly voice said from the other side of the door.

I opened the door, only to find her already inside. She stopped her conversation with the manager and brushed aggressively against my right arm as she left.

“Please sit down, Mr. Williams,” the manager in his early forties motioned me to a chair. I nodded and gulped the nervousness down to my throat.

***

Fortunate or not, I was given the typical welcoming and a few subtle warnings about job behavior. Mr. Jones motioned me to follow him as he explained our department organization.

Our work space was neatly organized in cubicles of three desks. I greeted my cubicle neighbors and got assigned to a desk next to the wall-sized windows. You could see people on the streets walking hurriedly to avoid the cold weather.

“Think fast!”

A paper ball bounced from my head to the window. I turned around, only to find a girl with wavy caramel hair convulsing on her desk while trying to hide her laughter.

“Don’t mind her, she’s sort of a natural prankster,” the guy in front of my desk smiled apologetically. He threw her more paper balls to scold her.

“I hope those paper balls end up inside the trash bin in a few seconds, Richard,” a familiar voice reprimanded.

I didn’t need to look at her face to know who it was.

“I can deal with my own disaster, Natasha.” Richard rolled his eyes and threw another paper ball. She looked at us with disgust and glared at the girl who was still laughing.

“What’s so funny, Arlene?” she asked defiantly. The girl finally stopped laughing and looked up with a serious look.

“Oh it’s nothing, Natasha!” she waved off, but her expression turned into a horrified one.

“Oh my God! Is that a wrinkle on your forehead?” Arlene noted with disgust in her voice.

“W-w-wrinkle?!” Natasha’s high pitched voiced squeaked as she ran off to the closest restroom.

“Superficial bitch,” I said out loud.

“I mean… I…” I looked at them in horror.

“Seems like we got one on our side this time.”

“Interesting!”

“Hey rookie. If you had plans on having lunch alone, it’s not gonna happen,” Arlene winked at me.

They introduced themselves and explained me the basics to survive in our area. Natasha was our manager’s assistant, so she had relatively more influence than the rest of us. I guess that explained why she was bossing everyone around. Richard suggested that if I played my cards right, she was a piece of cake to deal with. I also had to avoid her fan-boys which were seated on the cubicles surrounding her desk.

Arlene scribbled down on a copy of our department’s map small detailed notes. Ranging from which machine gives the best cappuccino, passing through blind spots to get calls or go for a smoke to finally end with pooping schedules.

A bit too informative.

“Make sure no one knows about it. Ever,” she whispered as she handed me the scribbled sheet.

“We have spent months on arduous research to get these top secrets. Treasure them well.”

“I will,” I replied doing the army salute. They laughed once more and I couldn’t help but join.

“God! I haven’t had this much fun on the last 2 months!”

“Why’s that?”

“The girl you have replaced admired Natasha blindly. It was suffocating. As if one Natasha wasn’t enough in this floor,” Richard motioned his hand into a gun and shot himself.

“We are not the only ones suffering. I saw her last week on the coffee room, text-bombing her boyfriend to pick her up for dinner. I’m still surprised her phone hasn’t turned into mashed potatoes.”

“Whoa, that guy deserves a medal for standing her.”

“How come none of you are Mr. Jones’ assistant? You guys look more capable than her.”

“Who knows?”

“Maybe she has an affair with Mr. Jones who she adores blindly,” I suggested jokingly.

“Wow. Gossip sure spreads faster than her legs,” Arlene’s laughter filled the cubicle and got rewarded with a few shooing from the group next to us.

“Keep it down, it’s probably hate-talk coming from the obscure depths of the women restroom or the reception pool.”

“Reception pool,” I confirmed with a laugh.

“Make sure none of the fan-boys hear you. You might get anonymous hate-mail and a few glares from them. Tooootally dangerous,” she reported sarcastically.

The sound of other employees standing up was a clear sign of lunch time, but Natasha’s pair of high heels stopped us from our awaited break.

“What now, Natasha?”

“I have to check on the rookie’s work progress,” she explained with a thickly repulsive voice.

“As far as I’m concerned, that’s my job as the cubicle head. Unless you have decided to do real work? If you excuse us…” Arlene shoved her gently aside.

She cleared her throat trying to get our fading attention toward her.

“Frank. I mean, Mr. Jones has assigned me this task, to check everyone’s progress,” she insisted.

“Why don’t you start with the first cubicle, then? Oh that’s right! No one is here at the moment,” Arlene stretched her arms around.

“Lunch time, Ms. Assistant!”

“But-“

“I can get really grumpy if I don’t have lunch on time,” Arlene growled.

“Fine! But Mr. Jones will hear about it!” she shoved us out of her way storming outside.

“What is she? Seven?”

“If Jones really wants a report, we’re in trouble. We’ve distracted Zachy way too much.” Arlene’s now concerned tone suggested.

Zachy didn’t sound that bad, eh?

“I’ll show you the ropes right after lunch. Please, tell me you’re a quick learner,” Richard begged me.

“We’ll see,” I answered sheepishly as we waited for the elevator to come.

***

“What would you like today? Junk food or healthy food?” Gerard asked sitting on my bed.

“He isn’t cooking today again?” I asked a bit concerned scribbling down notes for my exam. Gerard’s presence in my room made me nervous.

“Seems like it.”

“What are we supposed to do then? With all this junk food we might die of sudden cholesterol rise at this rate.”

“Making fun of you cheers him up,” Gerard suggested.

“Sorry, but I’m not really into psychological masochism.”

He stood up to see what I was doing. My heart skipped a beat at his proximity.

“Healthy food is fine,” I answered without giving it too much thought.

He didn’t budge a bit. He was still looking at my textbooks. Or me. I didn’t dare to look up. It wasn’t until my stomach growled that he apologized and went to order food. I felt a bit relieved at first, but it was suddenly replaced by anxiety. Missing him already was turning into a problem.

Half hour had passed and the food finally arrived. I walked into the kitchen and helped Gerard arrange the plates as he rummaged inside the fridge to get us drinks.

“What is it this time?” a grumpy voice asked from the kitchen door.

“Grilled chicken breasts with potato salad.”

I looked at him with concern. Sean’s handsome features remained the same, but there was no hint of playfulness in him.

“What’s with that face? I’m fed up with you guys looking down on me.”

The atmosphere suddenly tensed up.

“Sorry,” I apologized.

He snorted and gently took the plastic box off my hands. I complained but he interrupted me with a fork in hand.

“I may not be cooking, but I know how much you eat, hungry leprechaun,” he said as he put more potato salad on my dish. I looked up to see that devious grin that distinguished him perfectly.

“What about you? You’re so skinny you look like a mic stand.” I countered as I put another piece of grilled chicken into his plate.

He hadn’t lost weight or muscles, but I played along.

“I might step on you if you don’t grow faster!” He put more potato salad on my plate.

“That’s unfair. Nothing extra for me?” Gerard joined in with a wink.

“Nope,” we said at unison.

Sean’s laugh beamed through the room. Dinner went smoothly and neither Gerard nor I asked about the issue. After we watched TV, I went back into my room to finish the exam notes. A few knocks on my door got my attention.

“Is it too late to get updates on the project?”

I hesitated for a moment, but talking to him had been difficult lately. I pat twice on my bed, motioning him to sit down to start explaining him what Caroline and I had done on the last week without his participation.

“Wow, she must be pissed; I should make it up to her somehow.”

“I’m quite pissed too.”

“Who cares about you?”

“At least I’m not being an asshole to everyone,” I grinned.

There was a long pause. I turned around fearing that I had killed the mood. But all I saw were his green olive eyes locked on mine. I gulped.

“This is something you shouldn’t barge in,” he smiled and patted my head.

“But thanks, bro” he hugged me tightly and went back to his room.

“You’re welcome,” I whispered, but he was long gone.

My heart raced violently as I sat down to finish my exam notes.

It was the first time I had felt his gentle touch. Not a slap on my head whenever I threw him popcorn. Not a kick on my leg like on those fights under the table. Not even a punch on my arm when I made a witty joke in front of him. A gentle hug and a ‘thanks’ coming out from his lips.

I buried my head into the soft pillow. His green olive eyes couldn’t have triggered something inside me, right? It was plain nonsense.

Yes.

Just nonsense.

***

“Earth to Zachy. Earth to Zachy.”

“Look at him, you idiot! You shouldn’t have taught him all those useless features. Teaching him the ropes my ass! You’ve traumatized our only ally!”

“At least he knows how to do perfect reports now. Right, Zachy?” Richard pleaded.

“Uh. Right,” I answered robotically.

“The rest of my days of work are ruined!” Arlene snapped at Richard.

“Zachy, honey, tell me you are still with us.”

“Uh. Yeah.”

“Well, monosyllabic answers are fine right?” Richard shrugged.

“Do you think working extra hours today will improve his answers? NO.” Arlene motioned her hands to strangle Richard.

I snapped out of my thoughts just in time to save Richard’s neck. Arlene let out a big sigh and went back to her desk.

“Sorry. I have been thinking about … stuff. I’ll get to work now.”

They looked at each other and shrugged.

“Love issues, honey?” Arlene giggled.

“NO. Uh. No. Just… stuff.”

“Right. Is it a boy or a girl?” she giggled harder now. If I didn’t stop this conversation she would convulse on the floor, which wasn’t very lady-like. A loud bang was enough to drop the topic.

“I NEED RESULTS, NANCY! RESULTS!” Natasha snapped to a girl in the seventh cubicle.

“Wow, it’s been the third time this week.”

“What has?”

“Well, while you’ve been in lovey-dovey land, she’s been annoying the hell out of everyone with her to-do lists. Sales department requested a full analysis on last semester’s sales and she has been postponing it until now. As you see, everyone is stressed but us.”

“Thanks to my outstanding guidance and your perfect reports Zachy.” Richard motioned a thumb up.

“Which almost turned him into a robot, idiot.” Arlene scolded.

“Why is she stressed anyway? She only has to show the reports to Jones, not do them.”

“Maybe her head will roll this time. Or her ass.”

“I hope both of them. We will have to stay here because of her, while she probably bangs Jones,” Arlene laughed out loud.

“Why so? It’s not fair.”

“Banging Jones? Ew Zachy.”

“Not that. Why do we have to stay while she … well, goes somewhere else?”

“God. How long have you been in lovey-dovey land? Jones came up to us two days ago and asked us, no, ordered us to stay on Friday to check everyone’s reports as her airhead assistant suggested. You nodded so we agreed too.”

“I don’t remember nodding.”

“Well, we do. And so does Jones.”

“Sorry. I guess I was out of my mind.”

“Oh! So you were really thinking about that person?” Richard snickered.

“I’ll treat tonight’s snacks if we drop this topic.”

“How so? You can’t leave on working hours and deliveries aren’t allowed.”

“Damn it.”

“If you make them double tacos, I will help,” Richard suggested.

“Richard! Get a hold of yourself. Aren’t you curious about Zachy’s love life?”

“But we’re gonna starve without snacks tonight. Double tacos, Arlene! Double!” Richard’s eyes brightened.

“You traitor. Include chips and salsa, and we have a deal,” Arlene sulked.

“Fine. But how am I supposed to order?”

“With the Smuggle Network.” She took out her phone and called someone.

I was left speechless. Were they regular employees or mafia members?

It took about 2 hours for everyone else to go home. I was almost done sorting the reports when a hand accidentally brushed them to the floor.

“Whoops! My hand slipped,” Natasha said trying to sound innocent. “You should hurry up though. I only have until eight to check on your progress.”

“Whoa Natasha, your hands seem too slippery lately; maybe I should help you cut them off.” Richard glared at her.

“Wow, you guys take everything seriously! Don’t you ever have fun?”

I rolled my eyes. Do you have fun banging Jones, bitch?

“What did you say?” she turned around glaring at me.

“What?”

“Wow Natasha. Stop snapping at everyone.” Richard defended.

“Maybe your consciousness is playing tricks you. Did you do anything shameful lately?” Arlene grinned.

“Of course not! Get back to work!” Natasha walked away flustered.

“Did I say that out loud?”

“Sort of.”

I guess that explained how Caroline had been reading my mind all this time.

“Look who’s here! Our delivery boy!” Arlene celebrated as a familiar face put a heavy box on her desk.

“Oh. Derek.” I recognized him.

“Uh…hello. I brought the … data you requested,” Derek’s voice trailed off as he looked at me.

“Calm down Derek. He is our ally. Where are the goods?” Arlene opened the box. Derek let out a sigh.

“Inside the volume IV, three chicken tacos and under file #325 the other three beef tacos. I’ve taken the chips and salsa as hostages until I get paid.” Derek whispered.

“Oh come on, Derek! We’ve been doing business for such a long time and you don’t trust us?” Richard scowled.

I handed the money to Derek and offered him a beef taco which he gladly accepted. I was surprised that he was one of our suppliers.

“This stingy pair never treats me anything.”

“You liar. We let you keep the change.”

“Thirty five cents is not enough for a taco.”

“What’s taking so long, Derek?” Natasha asked as she stood up and walked toward our cubicle.

“Hide the goods!”

Derek hurried to distract Natasha.

“Is there another thing I should know about all this? I mean the smuggle network, the map…”

“You’d be surprised,” Richard winked as he put the tacos into his drawer.

Our workload had finally decreased considerably by eight. It still wasn’t done and Natasha pressured us further.

“Can’t you do it faster? It’s past my work time!”

“So are ours and we’re not complaining.” Richard accused.

“Ugh. I’m leaving! Make sure to have it done by tomorrow.”

“We don’t work on Saturday.”

“Now you do. Mr. Jones will approve,” she walked away to meet him at the elevator.

“I promise I will find a way to get her kicked out,” Arlene groaned not caring if Natasha heard.

“Until then, let’s enjoy our tacos!” Richard took them out triumphantly.

We were done with our meal in a matter of minutes. We stayed up to midnight but didn’t finish the reports, so we called it a day. I waved them goodbye to catch the bus. I dozed off on the way home.

An irritating voice woke me up.

“O-M-G. We should’ve taken the taxi instead!”

Natasha.

I sunk down into my seat, so she wouldn’t notice me. She sat down far away from me while her boyfriend held her shopping bags and followed her. Her boyfriend scooted closer and put an arm around her but she ignored him by talking on the phone.

Poor guy.

I rolled my eyes and went back to look outside the window. So while we were working our asses off, she went on a shopping spree with her boyfriend? I hoped karma found her really soon.

***

The next morning, I woke up with the sunlight peeking through my curtains. I sat up on my bed, satisfied that I didn’t need going to work until noon. A cold bowl of milk with crispy cereal was an excellent way to start my day. As I munched on my breakfast, Sean and Gerard made their way into the kitchen.

“Morning!” I greeted them.

“Morning Zach,” Gerard answered with a pearly white smile.

“Hnng,” Sean grunted and rested his head on the table.

“Not getting enough sleep again?”

“Probably.” Gerard chuckled as he made a sandwich.

Sean lifted his head with a glare and snatched my bowl of cereal.

“Hey!”

“I’m hungry,” he retorted groggily.

“I put cinnamon bunches in it!”

“I don’t care.”

After he swallowed a spoonful he gave me back the bowl with a grimace on his face.

“Want me to get you a bowl with honey roasted bunches instead?”

“How do you even remember what I like?” He asked curiously with his green olive eyes wide open.

“I’m…quite good remembering small things,” I stood up and walked to the fridge to hide my blush.

“Now that’s interesting. Let’s see what you got,” Sean’s playful tone mocked. Whether I liked it or not, he was back.

“Try me.” I dared putting the bowl in front of him.

“My underwear size?”

Large.

“Gross. I don’t know.”

“How many abs do I have?”

Eight.

“Really? Uhm…four?”

“You were bluffing.”

“Ask something less personal, dude.” Gerard interrupted.

“Fine. Eyes color?” He closed his eyes.

Olive green.

“That’s still personal.” Gerard frowned.

“Then…Gerard’s favorite color.”

“Green,” I answered. A wide grin spread on Gerard’s face. Oh shit.

“Beginner’s luck. My favorite song?”

The persistent ring on the doorbell was my only escape ticket.

“I’ll get it.” I ran toward the door before I spouted the answer. A strong blush was creeping on my face.

“Oh come on! What kind of housemate are you?” I heard Sean whine.

The laugh I let out was soon replaced by surprise as I opened the door. The slender physique of the person standing outside the gate was unnerving.

“What are you doing here?” the squeaky voice asked.

“I ask you the same thing.”

“You’re not supposed to be here. Where’s Sean?”

“Excuse me?”

“Oh hello… Natasha. Sean’s inside,” Gerard greeted as he stood behind me. He opened the gate as I made no move to let her pass.

“Thanks Gerard,” a sticky smile crept on her face as she touched suggestively his arm.

I coughed soundly at the sight. They both looked at me.

“Sorry I threw up a little,” I turned around and closed the door right in Natasha’s face. I stormed into the kitchen.

“What’s my favorite sport?” Sean asked while he munched on his cereal.

“Not now Sean, plus your friend is here.”

“Friend?”

“Girlfriend,” the squeaky voice corrected.

Oh great. Surprise, surprise! Your crush has a girlfriend.

Wait. Girlfriend?

And with that little word there was a knot in my throat.

Natasha was definitely not banging Jones, but it wasn’t Sean either.