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An English Teen, Circumcised in the USA - 43. Laid Bare

An English Teen, Circumcised in the USA

by Riley Jericho

Laid Bare

Luke looked up and across the hubbub towards the other side of the locker where Landon was changing. How the asshole still managed to come up smelling of roses in the aftermath of the confrontation in the Principal’s office was beyond him. Okay, maybe not roses, but not pig shit either! It was surprising how many had somehow picked up the idea from the bastard, that he'd taken the rap and shifted the blame off Ryan.

Pig Shit!

Frankly, he didn’t give any kind of shit about anything to do with Landon anymore. It still pissed him off that they all seemed happy with the outcome—that that it had just been a smack on the hand, just like Mitchell had predicted. The mood around them was ready to enjoy a little more fun once more.

Assholes. Who cared what they thought?

What he was more bothered about was the frequent teasing Ryan was still being subjected to, and the growing enthusiasm there was for this last lesson of the morning before the lunch break. Everyone wanted a peek at the results of Kieran’s handiwork!

They spent the session working out in the Gym, passing from one piece of equipment to the next in a well-planned routine of running, lifting and stretching. It was just the twenty of them, and afterwards they returned to the smaller locker B to shower and change out of sweatpants and go for a well-earned lunch. In the process, the provoking humor edged up a notch with the hope that Ryan could be tempted to display his freshly mown frame under the showerheads.

“Just ignore them,” he muttered, turning away from the rowdy banter, towards where Ryan was sitting. His friend wore a dark frown, no doubt from the frequent jibes. Luke knew that, for the most part, it was only horseplay, but they just didn’t get it. “And you certainly don’t have to shower if you don’t want to,” he added. Frankly, he was planning to skip it too.

Even though he'd packed his kit that morning, his mum had still given him another note to excuse him the gym period. He'd been of two minds about it, and was sorely tempted to give the period a miss and head for the Library again. But after what had passed in Benton's office, the note had stayed in his bag.

With the week they'd had, his surgery had played second fiddle to what had gone down. Every day brought an improvement to his condition, though the last forty minutes had contained numerous teeth-grinding pangs. That was bad enough, but he didn't think he was anywhere near confident enough to show off his tender and newly skinned-back schlong in the showers! He felt relieved when Ryan reached for his clothes; it looked like he was going to take the advice as the teasing persisted. He reached for his own stuff too, but flinched as someone's sneaker came flying out of nowhere in Ryan's direction. It missed and bounced along the ground.

“SHUT IT! ALL OF YOU!” Todd had been sitting on one of the benches watching too, and reared up.

“Shut the fuck up yourself, Quince!” Mitchell taunted. “Come on Ry – don’t be shy!” He smirked at his clever ditty.

Todd was scathing as he bit back, “You know, the thing is Cody, nobody actually cares what you think. I’m not sure anyone even likes you!”

All at once, the room hushed, sensing a fight looming.

“Come on Todd. Don’t be like that.” Jake frowned. In his hand he held his remaining sneaker. “We don’t mean anything by it.”

Todd glared at him. “You think I’m just going to sit here while you make life hell for Ry?”

“Big words, asshole,” Mitchell called out, keeping his distance. Luke reckoned that he would still keep it to just words, as you had to be really sure of yourself to take on Todd in a small space.

Rather than anger Todd, it seemed to energize him. A glint came to his eye. “Words are usually just crap, Mitchell, and you would know—you’re full of it.” He reached into his bag and withdrew something. “What we did to Ry the other day was pretty shit. I wish now I’d stopped it.”

“Boo-hoo! No need to fucking cry!" Mitchell's tone was biting. "I think you're your own there, bud!” He got a smattering of grins and sniggers.

“Really?” Todd eyes marched across the crowded space. “Any of you want to look me in the eye and tell me we did something fucking heroic?”

Luke could see more than a handful of those eyes waver. He wished Ryan could see it, but his head remained turned down, awkward at the exchange.

Landon got his voice at last. “Heroic, no. It was still pretty spunky though!” There were sniggers, though less than before.

“So be it!” Todd seemed to grow in stature. “But if you…” he scanned the crowd and suddenly bellowed at it, “...any of you STUPID ASSHOLES think you can just keep getting off on the fact that Ryan got shaved, then you gonna have to start jerking off to me too!”

Luke’s eyes widened. Explicit or what! Then he gaped as, to a stunned silence Todd switched on the shaver he'd palmed. Without missing a beat, he wrenched down the front of his sweat pants and boxers and stripped himself bare. The thick black curls pared away a lot more easily than Luke had expected, and gathered on the ground.

Finally, Todd looked up from his dark bare skin. “THERE! Laugh yourselves sick. There’s two of us now!”

“Holy fuck!” Out of the lull, Miller muttered what everyone else was thinking.

Luke didn’t even stop to consider if it was a good idea or not. Calmly he took the chunky wet and dry Norelco shaver, and pushed down his sweats and boxers. He didn’t have a great deal anyway after the previous trim—certainly nowhere near the amount of bushy pubes that Todd had recently sported. Not that it mattered. Flicking the switch, the hungry head marched across his skin leaving a furrow of bare skin. It only took a few more passes before he went smooth too. He eyed them with stony determination and ground out, “Me too.”

“And me.” The sharp-edged tone in Kieran’s voice cut even more of a swathe than the Norelco. His eyes flicked to where Ryan was sitting with a tight expression, watching the proceedings. “Sorry bud. Of all people, I should have known better.” He too then pushed down his clothing and buzzed himself down to the dark smooth groin that the whole class had once jeered at without remorse.

Fucking hell. After what they done to Kieran that previous Christmas, the guy had grit!

Meanwhile, Todd had calmly undressed. “Anyone else for a shower, or are you too spineless?” Completely brazen, he took his towel and bald patch through the crowd, that separated to let him pass.

Preparing to undress too, Luke turned to Ryan and raised an eyebrow. “Coming?”

Ryan blinked and seemed unable to find any words to say. Instead, to the numb silence that surrounded them, he shed his clothes. The two of them, with Kieran not far behind, walked to the showers.

Behind them, Mitchell got his voice back and let loose a volley as they entered the steaming shower room. “Fucking gays,” he jeered.

Surprisingly, it was followed by a more muted. “Shut it Mitchell.”

Inside, Todd was in a remarkably upbeat mood. If he felt sheepish as water sprayed over him, he hid it well. “Aren’t we a bunch of freaking idiots!” He grinned and studied himself. “Shit—I look cool though!” He laughed in an easy self-deprecating way.

Kieran snorted, and Luke had to agree. Todd was not going to make it as a porn star. On closer inspection, he’d missed quite a few clumps, so maybe he would do better if he tidied up a bit.

Finally Ryan spoke. “You guys are complete assholes you know.” To Luke it sounded as shaky as he had the night he'd drunk too much. “But thanks…and Kier…” He struggled to get the words out. “I’m so sorry—I know I deserved it after what we did to you.”

“Forget it, Homie!” Kieran grinned down at himself. “Unlike Todd, I look kinda hot!” He pulled a face and scratched his chin. “Oh shit—now I just have to explain it to Trish!” He shrugged. ‘Oh well.”

Luke smirked. Trish was Kieran’s girlfriend. He tried not to think about why she would have the opportunity to be surprised, when they were joined by more from the locker room. Most seemed a little uncomfortable with what had happened and, as the shower room began to fill, a space opened up separating the smooth from the hairy. Conversation stayed at a minimum.

He decided to just ignore them.

“Room for another?” They turned to find an upbeat Chris Anderson. He was as bare as a baby’s bottom and Luke grinned in welcome as they made space for him. That made five altogether. Not bad for a statement!

It looked as if most if not all came in the shower that morning. Maybe they were sweaty, or maybe they didn't want to miss anything. However, there seemed nothing much more to write home about, and some were already beginning to leave, when Matt Young pushed through the doorway. He was still dressed in his shirt and sweats. In his hand he held the Norelco. “What the fuck is this?” He stormed up to them. It was hard to know what Matt really meant though he seemed steamed as the words ripped from his throat.

Todd stepped out in front of him, a warning glint in his eye. Luke became wary too. Whatever his beef was, Matt was a big guy and nobody wanted a fight.

“It’s being fucking gay, that’s what it is, Matt!” Mitchell crowed over the tops of heads that separated them. “Just leave them to their baby cocks.”

“For once in your fucking life, asshole, JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Matt’s bellow caused several guys to flinch. Eyes widened and the room froze as Matt’s clothing slowly became sodden under the remorseless jets. Like Kieran, Matt was a basketball player. The tall teen moved in front of Ryan, though this time Todd didn’t intervene. This was something else and they were all on tenterhooks wondering what.

“This…” Matt held up the shaver again, but now he struggled to get his words out. “Shit...” He stopped and dragged the back of his hand across eyes already wet with the spray of the shower.

“Matt…” Ryan muttered. If he'd been shaken before, now he looked pale as he stepped out from under the spray. "I...."

“This isn’t just for you...” Matt interrupted, incredibly agitated. Then he stopped again, struggling to continue his sentence. “But…I’m so fucking sorry that I was part of that…” He broke up again and looked away. “I mean what the fuck do we think we’re doing?” His accusation appeared to be directed at everyone.

Nobody spoke. Not even Mitchell. Luke still had no idea what this was about.

“My kid brother…” Matt's voice became tight. “Last night…” He stalled again, and his face twisted. “Last night, I sat with Alex. He cried his eyes out as he told me that they’d benched him on his birthday; dragged his dick out and tried to make him…” He trailed off, unable to say it.

The uneasy silence grew, broken by an uncomfortable mutter that came from somewhere behind them, “Come on Matt…”

He shook his head angrily and shouted, “HE’S ONLY JUST TURNED TWELVE, FOR FUCKS SAKE!” Heads snapped back like the owners had been slapped in the face.

Matt looked tormented. “So I’m asking you again," he ground on, demanding and impassioned. "What the FUCK are we doing?”

He didn’t wait for an answer, though it was unlikely anyone was going to offer one anyway. “We do shit like we did to Ry and Kier like it was some harmless fucking game—and I know I’m guilty as hell too! But when kids in Middle School start doing stuff because we do, are we so fucking surprised that they get so fucked up in their heads, they don’t even know what’s right any more?

“They're just KIDS!" He glared around, but no one met his gaze. "And this has to stop, 'cos I for one give a shit."

He was openly crying now, and even the rivulets of water weren’t enough to disguise the tears that streamed down his face. “This isn’t just for you, Ry—this is for my kid brother. For Alex. Because I can’t look him face him again and pretend I wasn’t the part of the reason a bunch of kids ripped his pants down and fucked him up!”

Pushing down his soaking sweats and trendy Calvin Kline trunks, he fired up the Norelco and slashed though his already well-cropped pubes. When he’d finished, he held up the shaver, and Luke had no doubt that somebody would else take it up. Several were as emotionally moved as Matt—especially those with younger brothers at the school—rubbing their eyes and trying not to let it break them.

The first was Rick Marino. Rick’s kid brother was still in Elementary. His face was twisted with the effort not to cry as he took the razor, and all he could get out was, "I give a shit too..."

It released several more, and soon there was a determined line. Hardly anyone spoke and nobody, but NOBODY, left until it was done. It wasn't the whole class by far, but soon there were a dozen scraped guys having made a stand.

Todd took over and Luke was grateful. It was for times like this that they needed Todd. He invariably knew what to say.

"Well, there you have it," Todd said as the group looked round at themselves wondering what came next. "Like Matt, I give a shit too, and if I'm not wrong, all of us do. Some of us have scraped, some are still thinking about it. Some can't for various reasons, but it doesn't mean you don't care.

"Things have gotta change, but it's only going to happen if we make it."

There were nods of agreement, and looks of relief from those who hadn't buzzed away their curls. At the same time, Luke didn't see anything but stony faces on Mitchell and Landon.

Despite that, Todd had nailed it to the point where Adam Miller swore and took the trimmer. "I was damn well doing it tonight anyway," he muttered. "Might as well get it done!" He looked up and grinned as he poised ready with the blades. "What if I carve an 'S' into it, 'cos I damn well give a shit too!"

Relieved laughter skittered across the group and there was a lightening of the tension as people started breathing again.

"Okay guys," called Todd as soon as Adam joined the ranks of the recently shorn. "One last thing..."

All ears—including Luke's—pricked up, wondering what he was going to say.

"I think we have to put our hands together for our very own imported Englishman!"

Luke frowned. That had to be him, but he had no idea what Todd was on about.

"I give you Luke Summers!" Todd grinned widely. "Who this very day is here to prove to us he's become a true American, and has finally shed the anteater and got himself well and truly unhooded!"

Oh holy freaking Mother of Mary!

In the midst of it all, he had TOTALLY forgotten about that! He cringed as his eyes flew down at the unfortunate reminder that his pubes weren't the only things that had been stripped. It felt like every eye followed him.

Chris was one of the nearest. "Well, hot damn!!” he exclaimed as he got an eyeful. “Look at that! You went and got yourself skinned!” Like him, everyone seemed blown away. The only ones that kept smug smirks were Todd and Ryan.

He threw a daggered look at them. Douche bags!

Flabbergasted his classmates might have been, speechless they weren’t, and with something new to focus on, the questions started coming thick and fast—and ‘why’ was near the top.

Before he could answer, Ryan kicked in. On the outside at least, he seemed different from the person that had hurried back from the gym with his head down. “He had a disease!” he chuckled. The troubled, dull expression had gone and it looked like the old Ry was back. Hopefully for good now that so many had pulled together behind him like they had.

“Asshole!” Luke pulled a face, but the tone was cheerful. “If you wanna know guys, I had to have it done for medical reasons because of a tight foreskin!” Might as well get it all out there. “It was done last week and it’s freaking sore!” It had still only been three days since the device had—with a little help from Ry—been removed. The cut line was still a red weal and he'd subconsciously stood away from any direct shower play on his glans.

“It’s why the poor guy is walking like a demented crab!” explained Ryan, a cheeky smirk on his face. Luke rolled his eyes and bore the teasing comments it brought.

“Hellfire! You’re brave!” muttered Ethan at last, pulling the kind of face that was common to many guys when it came to willy surgery. “Is that where they cut it?”

No, they used staples you dumbass!

Ethan shook his head. “I’d never let them touch mine!”

“Well I didn’t really have much of a choice!” Luke returned.

“And anyway, Eth,” added Todd, laughing, “You’re already cut, or hadn’t you noticed!”

Ethan Parker examined his own low cut dick that now sprouted out of a perfectly smooth groin, and grinned at the playful banter.

There were plenty more questions that followed. They all wanted the gory details of the surgery and when and where he’d been in hospital. He skated over most of the facts and gave them a potted version of a SmarKlamp circumcision. One thing he was relieved about; he was far too self-conscious in front of an audience to be worried about anything inadvertently stirring. That said, he still kept well away from the shower sprays!

“Show’s over, guys!” said Todd finally, thankfully bringing the interrogation to an end. “Let’s leave Luke to look after his own wanger. Come on, I’m starving!” In good spirits, they all trouped out to get dressed.

As they changed, it was odd to be surrounded by guys who were shaven smooth. Not wanted to risk dwelling on it too long, he slipped into a pair of his new boxers. They were the red ones. He caught Ryan’s eye, who rubbed his forehead and grimaced at the shared memory. Then he grinned.

At least he can laugh about it now.

“So?” he demanded. He kept his voice down as he gave Ryan the evil eye. “How did Todd know?”

Ryan looked like butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth. “I dunno—I might have accidently mentioned it last week.”

“Accidently?”

“Yeah, well,“ Ryan shrugged. “These things happen.”

Right…

Afterwards they made their way towards the cafeteria. Luke was walking with Todd, while a little way in front, Ryan was deep in conversation with Matt. Further ahead of them, Mitchell, Landon and Johnson were as thick as thieves. JJ glanced back, but it was impossible to tell what was going on in his head.

Now he had Todd alone, he asked the obvious question. “So where the hell did you get that trimmer?”

Todd chuckled. “I went out and bought it yesterday afternoon, then put it on charge overnight.”

“Yesterday?” He’d assumed that…he frowned. Actually, he didn’t know what he’d assumed.

“I had to do something,” Todd explained. He lowered his voice “I mean it was my fault Ry got pulled up. Maybe if…”

“Hey—I was there too,” Luke interrupted. “Maybe we both messed up.”

“Maybe,” Todd allowed as they walked slowly towards lunch. “Anyway I guessed that something like this would happen and they wouldn’t be able to leave Ry alone, so…” He shrugged. “I kind of had a plan, but wasn’t sure I’d have the guts for it.”

“The plan being to strip your pubes too?”

“Something like that," Todd grinned. "It was either mine or Mitchell’s. I guess he got lucky!”

Luke burst out laughing earning him an enquiring glance from the pair in front. “Well, all I can say is you were pretty awesome, bud!”

“Maybe...” Todd said, though he remained thoughtful. “I never expected it to turn out like it did though. Shit – that was…” He trailed off. Luke was in the same mind—there didn’t seem words for it.

“Let’s hope something good comes of it,” he said. He smirked to himself—other than that he got to try out what smooth was like and still stay one of the crowd.

“Me too,” said Todd. “In fact I plan to tell as many people as possible!”

Luke gaped. “You’re actually going to tell people what we did?”

“Why not?” There was a glint in Todd’s eye. “And so are you! How else are we going to get everyone on board?”

“You know you’re a total bozo!” He rolled his eyes. “Still awesome, but a total bozo!”

Despite it, he suspected Todd was right, and if he thought Todd was joking when he said he was going to pass the word, he was wrong! The guy went on a crusade and others joined him. By the time he and Simon were out in the parking lot waiting for a lift, he could hear the gathering buzz of it in the groups that waited around them or passed by on their way to their cars.

Once he was home later that afternoon, much though he might want to go out and do something more interesting, he settled down to some schoolwork. Finals were looming, and with the week they’d had, he was way behind with revision, let alone getting through the endless homework that was still getting thrown at them. Ryan already indicated that he’d have to be doing the same, and he didn"t get the sense that his friend was dropping back into a depression again. In fact Ryan had been like a new person—or maybe it was just the old one again—and all through lunch and during the afternoon, he'd remained upbeat. However, they had both gotten behind that week and it needed attention, so he settled at his desk, and got out his geography book to reread the module on climate change. He'd begun to think more seriously about med school like Ella, and to prove he had it in him, it was time to put the foot back on the pedal again!

By five, he was starving and was relieved to hear the call for dinner. He’d actually got a lot done and was satisfied with that. Maybe after eating he’d do another hour and then call it quits.

“What’s for dinner, Mum?” He pulled a chair in at the kitchen table. Whatever it was it smelled good, and by the look of what he could see though the oven door, it was pizza. Then again, as long as it wasn’t fish pie, he didn’t care!

“I just put in a few pizzas,“ she replied getting the first out of the top shelf. “Be a dear and put the salad on the table for me, will you?” She carried the first huge circle to the table, then went to the door and shouted. “Come on you two—dinner’s on the table!”

“So how’s Ryan today?” she asked, beginning to slice it up.

“Actually a lot better!” Luke felt upbeat. “In fact, I would say it was a really good day all round!”

She smiled. “I’m glad to hear it. Just to warn you though, Dad still thinks there should be some consequences from yesterday.”

Consequences? Crap. He pulled a face, though he hadn’t really expected to get away scot-free.

“What kind of consequences?“

She peered over the pizza and gave nothing away. “Let’s wait for him shall we?”

* * *

Extract from Luke’s notes:

I had to wait till the end of the pizza before finally finding out my fate.

After I got the bad news, at first I thought, big deal…so what if I don’t have the use of my Macbook for a couple of weeks? But then afterwards, when I began to add up how much I actually used it, with Facebook, email and surfing, it wasn’t a compete walkover. At least I wouldn’t lose it until after the exams and it WAS only for a couple of weeks. It could have been a lot worse and they might even forget altogether!

Yeah – right!

That evening, I did another hour and then decided I’d done more than enough. Nothing was really going in by then anyway, so I switched to Facebook.

* * *

Damon was online, and messaged Luke almost immediately.

[DAMONJ] "Hi Luke....are you there?"

[DAMONJ] "If you are, I need to ask you something."

[LUKE] "Hey there—what's up?"

[DAMONJ] "Do you know any good hotels in Atlanta?"

[LUKE] "Why - are you coming down?"

[DAMONJ] "To visit you? No chance!"

He was relieved. Friend that Damon seemed to be, he didn't really want to go that far with him.

[LUKE] "Good call! I could be a creepy perv!"

[DAMONJ] "Worse—you could be a girl LOL! Actually my folks are coming down for some convention. I said I'd ask you about places to stay."

Luke grinned as an immediate comeback came into his head.

[LUKE] "Dunno really. I usually stay at our house!"

[DAMONJ] "Smartass!"

[LUKE] "If they want to be city centre, I think the Marriott is okay."

[DAMONJ] "Cool. Will let them know."

[LUKE] "So when is it?"

[DAMONJ] "In a few weeks."

[LUKE] "They're leaving you by yourself?"

[DAMONJ] "Yep. Just me and the goldfish!"

[LUKE] "Oh God—don't start that again! Anyway, how's things with you?"

[DAMONJ] "Oh - same old, same old. You?

[LUKE] Yep....fine…"

Oh come on!

[LUKE] "Actually, to be honest, it’s been a tough week."

[DAMONJ] "Sorry to hear. How so?"

[LUKE] "Oh, you know how it is—some crap stuff at school, and a friend got hurt.”

[DAMONJ] “Ouch—not good. What happened?”

[LUKE] "It’s complicated…can’t say really. It’s all good now though.”

[DAMONJ] “He’s okay?”

[LUKE] “I think so—at least I hope so. I dunno. To be honest, I seemed to spend the whole week stuffing up and making it worst. Just wanna tune it out now.

[DAMONJ] “LOL! You should try retail therapy! Works for me!"

Yeah, it had worked for him too. For a while at least. At least his mum had stopped trying to get him to return it all now.

[LUKE] “Nah, am not much into shopping."

[DAMONJ] “LAMO! Don't tell me—your mom goes and buys it all!"

[LUKE] “Not likely! In fact I bought some new stuff the other day! It's just I don't much care to spend my life at the Mall!"

[DAMONJ] “Fair enough—just kidding! Hey forgot to ask. How's the C?"

Luke smirked - he knew perfectly well what C meant.

[LUKE] “They tell me I'm walking like a demented crab, LOL! "

[DAMONJ] “They? Cool—so you told your friends?"

[LUKE] “I think they noticed, yes… They took the piss a bit, but it wasn’t as bad as I’d thought"

[DAMONJ] “Crap - don’t you just love the locker rooms!"

[LUKE] “Yeah – but not as much as you do I bet!”

He smirked to himself as he pressed send. For a gay kid it would be as good as a weekly visit to Disney! On the other hand, maybe it was a way in to talking about his own feelings at last. He had time and was in no rush for once. Perhaps now was a good time to talk the gay thing through with someone who would understand and give some good advice?

There was a long pause to the point where he began to doubt what he’d typed.

[DAMONJ] “That’s a pretty piss-ass thing to say. Is that what you really think?"

Oh crap.

[DAMONJ] “If you think that’s all gay guys do – sneak into the fucking locker room to get off looking at naked guys, then fuck you!”

[LUKE] “Sorry… I don’t think that. It was a stupid thing to say.”

There was nothing in return

[LUKE] “Look, I am sorry… I’m a fucking idiot.”

Still nothing and it felt like the abrupt end to another friendship. He was disappointed…mostly in himself. All he ever seemed to do was mess up!

[LUKE] “Okay…well…see ya.”

Suddenly the screen blinked back

[DAMONJ] “Sorry—guess I’m just a bit oversensitive. I had a bit of a crap week too, to be honest. I’ll go get some counseling from my goldfish or something."

Luke was relieved as the guy took the sting out of it.

[LUKE] “I didn’t mean it like that, but I feel bad—it was still a bit crap thing to say.”

[DAMONJ] “Forget it. Tell you what—if I’m ever in the locker room at your school, I promise not to jump you!”

[LUKE] “You’re kidding—you’d have to be nuts to want to be at our place!”

He bounced the reply back quickly, but decided—yet again—to put the whole gay thing on the back burner. Maybe it was doomed to just stay there? It should have been be easy, but… He sighed and stayed on safe ground. They chatted a bit more before he went downstairs to watch some TV.

By ten, he was more than ready for bed. He took a quick shower before climbing under the sheets and opening the top drawer of his bedside cabinet. Bloody hell, if she was going to provide him with a tube of lube, then to hell with what she knew or didn't. He was going to use it!

Maybe unlike Landon and Mitchell, Ryan has real friends who’ll go out on a limb for him. It looks like things are turning a corner, though what exactly is around that corner is anyone’s guess. Good things let’s hope!

Appreciating the reviews and the interest in the story, so thank you!

Riley
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Copyright © 2016 Riley Jericho; All Rights Reserved.
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Chapter Comments

Obviously Todd went through some serious soul searching off camera. That took some guts and I think showed him in a little different light from the way my mind was moving.
It also showed how easily a bunch of kids can be motivated, as did the original incident in the boy's john. Another great chapter!

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This chapter (and the last) have been exciting to read. Read together as a pair, they are especially good. I wonder how Ryan feels about the people who seem to be rallying in his defense. It would be nice to get inside his head for a scene.

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when i think about this chapter I'm a little confused. its like you (riley) saying that a bunch of male adolescents are going to forget about their sexual urges and go where?? there boys and they are in a all boys school and they take a shower each day with each other and there's going to be comments and jibes and kidding and even some contact. like its said never drop the soap in a boys shower. even what they did in shaving each other is not too over the top (as far as I'm concerned. it makes the story more interesting? maybe!). they are going to do things like what they did and also what was done to the little brother. its called growing up. show me yours and I'll show you mine. nothing unusual. and i can't for the life of me think that any of these things are going to have a lasting effect on anyone's personality.
it was a good chapter and i enjoyed it even though it was very thought provoking. that's what writing should be about.
thanks for writing. i look forward to each week and the next chapter. and what happened to simon and toby? if i recall weren't they a little more involved previously. i think that the situation they are in and with tobys mother the other element that make it particularly interesting.

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Well, I've just finished reading the whole story and had decided to wait till I reached this point to write a review. Great work ya have here! Before I get started with this chapters review, I gotta say that previous chapter really made my day, Luke's strategy was amazing, it felt like a game or something.
Anyway, focusing in this last chapter I'd like to say that there are some interesting messages you have transmitted us in your writing:
The way some guys that had made bad things realized, thought about it and made a change was one of them, showing that there's not bad guys, just guys which do bad stuff... people is not what they do, as long as there's life there are possibilities to change.
The other one is at the end of the chapter in the chat with Damon and, while it might not be as 'deep' as the first one, it is important to our identity as 'gay guys' or any other group to that matter, here you're saying that to 'brand' people and people's actions is wrong. Just because a guy seems to be dressed as a homeless man, it doesn't mean he's gonna steal from you.
This is one of the causes of me giving you those 'likes', you're transmitting your ideas in a great way, through what you love to do. Of course, I don't really need to point out that your style of writing is really compelling and I love the story and the characters.
Keep up the good work!

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On 08/20/2015 11:40 PM, skinnydragon said:

Obviously Todd went through some serious soul searching off camera. That took some guts and I think showed him in a little different light from the way my mind was moving.

It also showed how easily a bunch of kids can be motivated, as did the original incident in the boy's john. Another great chapter!

It’s true, we’re getting to see a bit more of Todd. I think as all teens grow up their personalities begin to get more defined. You see a lot of ‘pack’ mentality in people, and not just in teens. I think everyone likes to believe that they are their own person, but a lot of the time behaviour is very defined by what their peers are doing. Few people are truly autonomous in that respect.

 

Thanks for the review Skinny

Riley

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On 08/21/2015 12:29 AM, Parker Owens said:

This chapter (and the last) have been exciting to read. Read together as a pair, they are especially good. I wonder how Ryan feels about the people who seem to be rallying in his defense. It would be nice to get inside his head for a scene.

Hi Parker. Glad you are enjoying the read. I agree, it’s hard to know what Ryan is thinking just now. I suspect that even if he’s cool on the outside, inside he’s still in some turmoil.

 

Thanks for the review!

Riley

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On 08/24/2015 11:37 AM, mgtbill said:

when i think about this chapter I'm a little confused. its like you (riley) saying that a bunch of male adolescents are going to forget about their sexual urges and go where?? there boys and they are in a all boys school and they take a shower each day with each other and there's going to be comments and jibes and kidding and even some contact. like its said never drop the soap in a boys shower. even what they did in shaving each other is not too over the top (as far as I'm concerned. it makes the story more interesting? maybe!). they are going to do things like what they did and also what was done to the little brother. its called growing up. show me yours and I'll show you mine. nothing unusual. and i can't for the life of me think that any of these things are going to have a lasting effect on anyone's personality.

it was a good chapter and i enjoyed it even though it was very thought provoking. that's what writing should be about.

thanks for writing. i look forward to each week and the next chapter. and what happened to simon and toby? if i recall weren't they a little more involved previously. i think that the situation they are in and with tobys mother the other element that make it particularly interesting.

Hi Bill - and thanks for the great insights! ’Never drop the soap in the boys shower’! LOL! Never heard that before!!

 

No of course there’s no way that teen guys at an all boys school are suddenly going to become angels. On the other hand, perhaps the Hang will get dropped. Will something else take its place eventually? Probably.

 

Simon and Toby are still brewing in the background, and I think Simon is in for a few surprises! (PS - don’t tell anyone I said that!)

 

Thanks again,

Riley

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On 08/24/2015 12:22 PM, theoneagus said:

Well, I've just finished reading the whole story and had decided to wait till I reached this point to write a review. Great work ya have here! Before I get started with this chapters review, I gotta say that previous chapter really made my day, Luke's strategy was amazing, it felt like a game or something.

Anyway, focusing in this last chapter I'd like to say that there are some interesting messages you have transmitted us in your writing:

The way some guys that had made bad things realized, thought about it and made a change was one of them, showing that there's not bad guys, just guys which do bad stuff... people is not what they do, as long as there's life there are possibilities to change.

The other one is at the end of the chapter in the chat with Damon and, while it might not be as 'deep' as the first one, it is important to our identity as 'gay guys' or any other group to that matter, here you're saying that to 'brand' people and people's actions is wrong. Just because a guy seems to be dressed as a homeless man, it doesn't mean he's gonna steal from you.

This is one of the causes of me giving you those 'likes', you're transmitting your ideas in a great way, through what you love to do. Of course, I don't really need to point out that your style of writing is really compelling and I love the story and the characters.

Keep up the good work!

Hello there my friend. Glad you made it through to the current chapter! You’ll be glad to know that the story is finished, though often new chapters take a week or so to come out because my editor is a totally ruthless *****! Love him to bits - he’s brilliant!

 

Some great insights here. Thanks you.

 

I think that people are always much more complicated than they seem from first impressions - and more so when it’s a limited story. It’s possible to get drawn along by the crowd - and even do bad things - but that’s not necessarily just who you are. People can change. Maybe it’s called growing up?

 

Anyway, thanks for the nice comments. It’s much appreciated.

 

Riley

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I love that they took a stand in an attempt to stop the Hanging though things won’t change overnight. I’m kinda disappointed that Ryan, especially considering he has a crush on Luke, told Todd something so personal about Luke that he didn’t want anyone to know. I realize everyone would have found out eventually but still you shouldn’t betray a friend’s trust like that plus I’d think the fact he has a crush on Luke would make him want to keep Luke’s trust even more. It doesn’t seem to have bothered Luke much if at all but it would have bothered me.

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I'm I the only only who's a little suspicious of Damien? Maybe he's not a gay teen, but someone with dark intentions? Probably me being paranoid but as soon as he started asking about Georgia, red flags were up.

We'll see. 🙂

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