The Tide Began to Rise - Repost - 14. Chapter 14

When I heard the door shut, the tears and sobs became more frequent. I thought James was one of my best friends. I thought that he would understand, and comfort me. I guess I was wrong. Both Brie and Brent put their arms around me. Jennifer had come over and sat in front of me and put her hands on my knee. There were trying to comfort not only me, but also my wounded heart.

“Ummmmm………………………….. Tyler…………………. Can we talk? ………………….. Alone please?”

I lifted my head and saw James standing there. Immediately the frown on my face changed to a smile.

“Sure……………………. Can you guys leave us alone for bit?”

They all nodded their heads. Everyone left the room, except Brie. She stayed for a minute. She was starring at James. I couldn’t tell if she was relieved to see him here, or if she wants to choke the life out of him. Reluctantly she left the room.

James pulled out my desk chair and sat down. “Tyler, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you like that. But that was hard for me to handle. I don’t know, I guess I was scared or freaked out or something. I wish you would have told me. I guess that’s why I am angry. I thought we were best friends. I thought we told each other everything. I’ve never kept anything from you. I could understand a small one, but this is huge.”

“Can you honestly sit there and tell me; that if I had told you a week ago, a month ago; hell even a year ago, that we would not be having this same conversation if I told you? The only thing that has changed is that I don’t have a family anymore, and I’m an emotional wreck. Granted that’s a big change, but it has not effect about how you feel about me being gay. Trust me, I wanted to tell you, I wanted to tell everyone. But I was afraid of this very thing happening. I would rather have friends and be able to put on a happy face, then to be left alone because everyone hates me. Up until now I have been happy with the false front that I put on for the world. Now I hate it. I feel like a bad person, because I have been lying to you all. Pretending to get turned on and gawk a girl the same way you do. It disgusts me. I can’t do that anymore. Not with you, Brad or Jennifer. I don’t care about the rest of the world. I care about what you guys think.”

“I’m sorry Tyler, your right. I can’t tell you that we wouldn’t be having this conversation, because I don’t know. And we never will. All I can do is tell you what I will do now. I’m going to help you pack up your belongings and move them over to your new house. I’m going to do that because you are my friend, and that’s what friends do for each other. I don’t care that you like it up the butt……………….I care about our friendship.”

James stood up and gave me a hug.

“I just need to ask two favors………….ok?”

“What are they?”

“One, don’t flirt with me. And two, please don’t go into detail about your sex life. Ok?”

“Oh, how is that fair. I had to listen to you talk about sex with Jennifer…………And what cant I flirt with you? You’re so cute.”

“Because it’s creepy”

“Ok fine………….. So are we good?”

“Yeah, it might take a little bit to get used to the thought of it. I will be fine though.”

“Ok good. Oh and can you not tell anyone. When I feel that time is right for more people to know, I will tell them. I just wanted to tell you guys so that I know, when I do come out, that I will have people stand beside me.”

“Of course, your secret is safe with me.” James stood up really fast and ran to the door. He opened it up and yelled “Guess what guys……Tyler’s Gay.”

“You’re such an ass James.”

“Yes I am.”

“OK guys, get back to work.”

“Yes sir, slave master, sir.” Brent said.

We all laughed. Everyone continued to pack my stuff. They would come across some stuff that they were not sure about. They asked me about it. I told them whether to pack it or throw it away. We worked up until lunch time. Everyone was starving.

“OK guys, let’s stop and get some lunch. What are you in the mood for?” I said.

“Let’s just get some McDonalds. It’s fast and easy.” Jennifer said. We all nodded in approval.

We made our way down the stairs and out to the suburban. It only took about 10 minutes to get to Mickey D’s, with all the stop signs and the one set of stop lights. I really was not very hungry, but they made me get something to eat. I ordered the double cheeseburger meal.

We decided to go through the drive threw. Once we had our food, we headed back to the house. We ate our food in the living room so that we could watch TV. There wasn’t much on. But this was just a break.

After everyone was done eating we all made our way back upstairs. Everyone got back to work. As box’s started to fill up, everyone started caring them down stairs. I asked Brent if I was going to need to bring my furniture. He told me no, that his mom is buying new stuff.

Eventually everything was out of the room that I was taking. I looked around the room one more time. I saw that there was a laid down picture frame on the dresser. I hobbled over and picked it up. James must have laid it down. When I saw who the picture was of, I felt my face go red with anger. The hate I felt towards my dad. I threw the picture against the wall. The frame and glass shattered the instant it came into contact with the wall.

Brent came running into the room. He must have heard the breaking glass. He looked at me, and then looked at the ground. He went over and picked up the picture that was inside. He looked at it, gave a long drown out sigh and dropped the photo. He came over to me and helped me leave the room for the last time. I closed the door on my past. Even though that part of my life was caked in turmoil; so much fear and anger; so much hurt; through it all, I am still deeply saddened to see it go.

I am afraid of the future. I’m afraid at what awaits me. Even though I have found the one I love, and he loves me back, that love is a secret. When the time comes, when he is ready to tell the world, what will happen? My friends have told me they love and care about me. When I finally tell the world, will they still be by my side? And what will the world do? I have heard stories about what people have gone through when they come out. Some of them are terrible, unspeakable about tragedies. Will anything like that happen to me? Or will everything be just fine. Through the many horrible stories, I have heard of some in which nothing has happened. Will I be that lucky?

Brent helped me down the stairs and out to his car. As we pulled away from the house; everything in my life, for once, felt right. I felt like this is where I am meant to be. I turned my head to look at Brent. He looked at me. We both smiled and in unison we said. “I love you so much.” I reached over and put my hand on his thigh. We drove the rest of the way in silence.

We got to Brent’s house; well I guess it is my house now as well. When we got to the house, Brent’s mom was waiting outside for us. I wondered if Brent called her or sent her a text to let her know that we were on our way. When we pulled into the driveway, she came over to the car. She opened my door and helped me get out. Brent grabbed the wheelchair out of the trunk.

“How are you doing Tyler?”

“OK, all things considering.”

“I understand…………… I have your room set up. We can always move things around if you don’t like the way it is set up. For now your room is on the main floor, I don’t want you hurting yourself going up and down the stairs.”

“Ok, and thanks again you don’t know how much this means to me.”

“Don’t mention it. You are a friend of Brent’s and you needed help. I f anyone else were in your situation, I would have done the same thing.”

We waited outside for the others to show up. We talked for a bit. When Brie and the other two showed up, they all started to take my stuff into the room Julie set it up for me. I just sat on the bed. I told them that I would unpack later. It had been a long and hard day. After all of my belongings were brought into the room, each of my friends gave me a hug and said good bye.

Once everyone was gone, Julie came into the room. “How are you doing? I bet this is so scary for you.”

“It is a little bit. Just not knowing what is going to happen.”

“Well you have a home here now.” She paused and smiled. “Is there anything I can get for you?”

I thought for a minute. “Nothing right now, but can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, sure”

“Well, I was wondering if it would be a problem to bring a dog here. Not a puppy, he is grown. I take care of him. He lives in an alley near my old house. Every night I would sneak out and go feed him. He was one of the only reasons I wanted to stay alive. If I was gone, then nobody would feed him, or take care of him.”

“I don’t see why not. We will need to take him to the vet to check him out. I think it would be nice to have a dog running around the house.”

“Really, wow, thanks……….. Do you think we can go pick him up tonight?”

She didn’t answer right away. I guessed that she was thinking about it. After a minute or so, she closed her eyes and nodded her head.

“Thank you so much.”

“No problem hun. How about we run up to Wal-Mart and get everything for him, Then we will go get the little guy.”

“Ok”

We made our way out to the car. At Wal-Mart we got dog food, the food and water bowls, and a food container. We were looking around and I saw the coolest dog collar. I put it in the basket. I also decided to get Patch some toys. We got him a few rope toys, and a few squeaky toys. Once we had everything picked out, we paid for it and headed back to Glenwood.

We headed to the alley near my old house. I got out the car, with the help of Brent. When I got out I called out for Patch.

“Patch…………….Patch……………….Patch….come here boy.”

I waited a couple seconds and yelled for him again. He still didn’t come. I waited about a minute, and then yelled for him once more. As I started saying “come here boy,” I heard the familiar bark and the sound of his nails hitting the concrete. Patch was running toward me at almost full speed. He jumped into my lap. Him landing on my leg sent pain through my body.

Patch looked scared. Maybe it was because he knew that he hurt me, or maybe it was because Brent and Julie were standing next to me. I could tell him trembling in my arms. He looked at me with sad but confused look.

“It’s ok Patch, they are not going to hurt you. We are here to take you home, a loving home. Would you like that boy?”

Patch’s tail started wagging. He barked twice, which told me he was excited. We went back to the car and headed for home.

I lived in the same house all my life. They only thing that changed was my father’s attitude. That house was all I knew. Yet now I live in a new and nicer house. I had only been there once before. But somehow I feel move at home here, more than I ever did with my family. Even back when my family got along, I never felt I belonged there. Here at this new house, I feel calm. Not just because I’m away from the abusive hands of my dad, but because I’m with someone that knows the real me and did not run away. None of my friends did. There is still one person that I need to tell, I’m not sure how that will go.

We got back to the house. I was helped to my room. Patch followed close behind me. When we entered the room, he ran and jumped on the bed. He curled up and fell asleep. Brent helped me undress, and get into the bed. We gave each other a kiss goodnight. He left the room. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.