Truths and Lies - 35. Noah's Arc

"Shit!" I gasped.

"Sorry, didn't mean to startle you," Jessica's older brother said quietly, a slight smirk on his long, expressive face.

"But-but-but..." I stuttered. I glanced at the door, which was closed but...Hadn't I locked it?

"It doesn't take much to open these kinds of doors," Noah remarked with a sheepish smile, seemingly reading my mind. He pulled a tiny screwdriver out of his shirt pocket. "Artie and I were forever sneaking into each other's rooms to spy or cause some sort of mischief," he noted nostalgically.

"So...you broke into Jessica's bedroom?" I asked incredulously.

"It seemed like it might be worth the effort," he said with a casual shrug.

"Worth the effort...?"

"Jessica's sent me a couple of impressive pics of course, but you're much more striking in person."

"Striking...?" Gees, what was wrong with me, just mindlessly parroting his words? I mean, what the fuck was this guy doing in here anyway? This room--Jessica's room--had been locked!

"Um...look, Noah," I finally managed to find my voice. "It was nice to meet you and all, but I really need to get dressed."

"Yes, I certainly lucked out in that department," he noted smugly.

I just looked at him in dumb shock, clutching the towel already wrapped around my waist.

"I'm sorry," he chuckled. Then he looked at me in more serious fashion, his brow knit as he squinted his eyes against some as yet unseen danger. "I suppose I should explain. Well, you see, Perry, I'm quite...how shall I put this?" He mocked a considering expression, then looked me levelly in the eyes. "Gay."

This couldn't be happening. Had I actually slipped in the shower stall and hit my head against the wall? Was I actually lying there right now, buck naked, blood pouring from my scalp, having some sort of demented dream? That somehow seemed more plausible than this. Jessica's brother--gay?

"What?!...You're joking, right?"

He shook his head resolutely, the slightly smug, but strained grin never leaving his face. "It's not the sort of thing that one normally jokes about, hmmm?"

"Does she know?" was the first question that popped out of my mouth for some reason.

"Actually, she doesn't," he replied with slight dismay, "and I'd like to keep it that way for now if you don't mind. It was an arrangement I worked out with Mother and Father back when I came out to them."

"So Mr. and Mrs. Bainbridge know, but Jessica doesn't?"

"And Arthur--he knows."

"Okay, but why're you telling me this?"

"Have you looked in the mirror lately?"he asked.

"Well, actually, it's kinda steamed up and-"

He laughed loudly, and it was a wet, gravelly sound, undoubtedly due to his smoking habit.

"I'm just fourteen," I pointed out irritably.

"Yes, you had a birthday on December the fifth. Jessica told me all about it." He held up the friendship band I had carelessly slipped off my ankle and dropped on the floor before going in the shower. "Charming."

I blushed, even though I felt more anger than embarrassment at this blatant and deliberate invasion of my privacy.

"Look, Noah," I said in the toughest voice I could muster. "I don't know why you felt like you needed to tell me about...about yourself like this, but I do know the door was locked and you shouldn't be in here!"

"Okay, okay!" he said, getting to his feet. But there was still a sly grin on his face that indicated he wasn't taking my shocked effrontery as seriously as I was. "I'll leave you to get dressed, but I really just wanted to see you. You're a very good looking boy, Perry, age not withstanding. And I know it was wrong of me to pop in unannounced, but I didn't think you'd let me just see you...like that, if I asked."

We just stared at each other for a few heartbeats.

"Would you?" he asked.

"Of course not!" Gees! Again, we just stared at each other. Even though he was five years older than me, I didn't feel particularly intimidated. It probably had something to do with that irritating half smile that refused to budge from his long face. I may have been way off base, but I didn't sense any physical threat here. He had gotten what he wanted--a cheap look at my stupid fourteen-year-old body, and it didn't seem to bother him much that I was pissed about it.

"Am I the first self-admitted gay person you've ever met?" he asked with genuine curiosity.

I hesitated, and then shook my head.

"No, that's right. You met Georgie, didn't you?"

At first, I didn't know who he was talking about, and then it hit me.

"George Rauch?" I heard myself whisper.

"He told me about meeting you over the Thanksgiving break. Apparently, you made quite an impression and he seemed rather smitten. I laughed at him, and told him it was patently absurd to be smitten by a little boy of course, and that it was all for naught anyway since my kid sister had already called dibs on you!" He laughed drily at his own joke.

My head was spinning. Jessica's brother was gay. Jessica didn't know, but the rest of her family did. And Noah knew George Rauch....

"I told him he must be out of his mind--an eighth grader, for pity's sake. But now that I've actually seen you for myself...." His voice trailed off as he continued to stare at me. A few drops of water still dripped from my wildly uncombed hair onto my shoulders and back. "I've tossed a lot on the table all at once, haven't I?" he noted with a tinge of regret. "We Bainbridges tend to be rather forthright about things. I'm sure you've experienced that with Jessy."

"Jesse?" I asked, momentarily confused. "Oh, Jessy...yeah."

"Look. I'll let you get dressed now, and if you want to talk more later, I look forward to it."

I wanted to scream at him that he was out of his fucking mind. What right did he have to break in here, hoping to catch a glimpse of my stupid body like some kind of perv? And yet, it didn't seem like a big deal to him, and maybe I was the one who was blowing things out of proportion. He was Jessica's brother, after all. He did know George Rauch, though in exactly what way, I wasn't quite sure. It had to be more than coincidence that both of them were about the same age, and that both of them were gay. "Yeah," I admitted reluctantly despite my irritation..."maybe I would."

"Very good then," he said with that meticulous pronunciation that made him sound British somehow, but without the accent. He walked to the door and put his hand on the knob. He took another long look at me, his eyes roving slowly from my head to my toes and back again.

"Would you like to do a little twirl?" he asked, making a small circle with his index finger pointed toward the floor.

I shook my head and defiantly held my position. Again he gave me a thorough look over. Finally, our eyes met again and I did my best to look more annoyed than curious. "My sister's a very lucky girl," he said with a knowing wink, and then let himself out.

If he only knew that Jessica meant practically nothing to me next to my beautiful blond angel. For what it was worth, I quickly went over and locked the door again. Damn! That had been embarrassing, confusing, and...and...what? It was too much to take in all at once. I felt a little shiver run down my spine that had nothing to do with the fact that I was still standing there with wet hair and no clothes on. I realized I could've just as easily sauntered out of the bathroom completely naked and gees, wouldn't that have made an interesting scene? Two Bainbridges in one day would've seen me in my birthday suit!

Still feeling more angry than anything else, I rummaged through my overnight bag and found the boxers my mom had packed. For crap's sake--red silk with tiny embroidered Christmas trees! Now I understood what she had meant about me being 'in the mood': the Christmas mood! Well, Bah Humbug! First, letting Jessica see me naked, and then confronting Jessica's obnoxious, and apparently gay, brother. Neither event made me feel much like decking the halls with boughs of holly, or anything else. But the sad truth was, I didn't want to put my disgustingly soiled cotton boxer back on, so I slid the ridiculous underwear on. I consoled myself with the thought that maybe later in the evening, I'd get Jesse alone somewhere and give him a little laugh. And then I took the scenario one step further and figured that, after I'd loosened him up with a peek at my silly boxers, I'd inform him about my sexual encounter with Jessica. I'd also for sure tell him about Noah.

Ugh...red socks too. I guessed I really was going to look Christmasy in spite of myself. Oh well, that was what I got for letting my mom pack for me. At least she had included one of my favorite fitted designer T-shirts instead of a plain undershirt. The fine cotton weave of mercerized, top quality Calvin Klein felt good against my skin and I figured I would still look okay without having to put my button down shirt on right away. After all, it was only...wow, after three thirty already! The afternoon was going by much quicker than I had imagined it would, and I was glad for that. Only two and a half hours before I'd see Jesse again. No doubt he'd look stunning in his dress-up clothes, his golden blond hair combed smooth and shiny and parted perfectly down the middle. Of course, he'd have Merissa Scott on his arm, and she'd probably be grinning like the cat that ate the canary, being the only 7th grader invited to the party, but more than likely, she and the other girls would cluster up, leaving me an opportunity to spend time with my one and only date for life.

I got my dark gray dress slacks out and put them on. My mom had also remembered to include the belt (Calvin Klein too!), which was much sleeker and nicer than my everyday school belt. I picked the friendship band up off the bed where Noah had dropped it, and dutifully slipped it on, sliding it down so that it was hidden under my sock. I hooked my crucifix back on and slipped it under my T-shirt. My square toed loafers didn't look very appealing, but I wasn't going to schlep around this huge house in my red socks, and I certainly wasn't going to follow Jessica's suggestion and go barefoot, so I stuffed my feet back into my comfortable Etnies.

I looked around the room and the mess we had made, our school clothes tossed around haphazardly and the bedcovers pulled off and bunched up at the footboard. I took a few moments to straighten things out a bit, stuffing my things into my overnight bag. I found the pillowcase with my dried spooge on it and started to toss it in the hamper next to the bathroom. Then I remembered how I had felt about Jesse's socks, and just laid the silky feeling bed linen on the floor. She could toss it in with the dirty laundry or not. I found Jessica's discarded ankle socks and gave them a tentative sniff. There was a pretty strong smell there, doubtless from all the vigorous activity associated with the pep rally--boy's weren't the only ones who suffered from stinky feet, but even so, there was a hint of that light flowery fragrance that I assumed was some perfume or eau de toilet that Jessica used regularly. I wondered for a moment if that was just her natural scent. It certainly went well with her physical beauty.

There was yet another mirror, this one an oval, full sized affair in an elegant wooden frame on the other side of Jessica's bed and I dared to glance at myself. It was a little disappointing after someone had just told me that I looked so attractive, to see those same big dumb eyes and those puffy lips, and that skinny body staring back at me. Well, okay, maybe I wasn't that skinny anymore. My shoulders were broadening a bit, and that was giving my torso more of the 'v' shape that I associated with maturing young men. But was I a fit young man? Fit to be tied, Jesse and Morgan would say! Gosh, I just couldn't figure it out though. I was so relieved that Jessica hadn't been freaked out by seeing me naked, but I was also baffled as to why a nineteen year old college student would break into his kid sister's room just on the off chance that he might catch a glimpse of an ordinary, fourteen year old boy in some sort of state of undress. It was hard to believe the audacity of someone admitting to a total stranger that he was gay. Even though I didn't like the feel of the distasteful thought in my head, Noah Bainbridge sure seemed like an arrogant prick, and I wondered what relationship he could possibly have had with a sweet and warm hearted guy like George Rauch. Even though I really didn't feel good about him, I knew that I wanted to find out what Noah Bainbridge had to say about that gentle giant who had rescued me from those thugs, Hollister and Hernandez, at the mall the day after Thanksgiving.

I remembered that I needed to call Jesse about the later departure time so I got out my cell phone. I hesitated only for a moment, cringing at the thought of having to spill my guts to my loving but sensitive boyfriend.

"Hello?" I could hear the blaring sound of a cartoon show going on in the background, meaning that Miranda was probably in the room, and that meant our conversation would have to be all business-at least on his end.

"Um...It's Perry."

"Hi, sweet baby!" Jesse said happily.

"Gees, isn't Miranda there?" I asked worriedly.

"She's in the bathroom giving her dollies a bath, I think. How's everything at Jessica's?"

"Well...um...." It was time to kill two birds with one stone. Why wait for a possible window of opportunity later tonight, when there was no time like the present? I knew I needed to tell him everything, but still the words stuck in my throat.

"Are you guys having fun over there without me?" he teased.

He sounded like he was in such a good mood, that I just hated to tell him what had happened. "I'm sorry, Jesse," I apologized, suddenly feeling a wave of guilt and regret pour through me and fill my chest with an unpleasant tightness.

"For what?"

"For...for being with Jessica."

There was a long pause and I couldn't hear anything but the TV. It was definitely Fairly Odd Parents--I recognized the distinctively annoying voices. I got ready to apologize again when he spoke so softly, I could barely hear him over the chattering cartoon characters.

"Did you...make love?"

"No! Of course not. Gees, no. Gosh, Jesse, I'd never do that to you, I mean to her. I mean...no, nothing like that."

"Okay." I could hear the relief in his subdued but still raspy voice.

"We just-"

"That's all I need to know, Perry. Really, I'm happy for you. Jessica is one lucky chick."

"Not really. She probably thinks I love her or something."

"Do you?"

"No. But I do like her, and I do find her...attractive."

"Of course. That's only natural. You deserve to have the prettiest girl in school."

"No, I don't," I countered quickly. "I feel so bad-"

"Don't, okay? I'm telling you, Perry. This is for the best. Best for us. The less people suspect that we're...you know, together, the better."

I wanted to tell him that I felt bad about using Jessica as our 'smokescreen,' but I didn't think this was the time for a long, drawn out discussion about that.

"Look, I'll see you tonight, and you can tell me whatever you want," Jesse said. "But I'll always love you, so don't think otherwise."

"That-that's hard to believe," I said, swallowing a lump in my throat.

"It's true."

"Okay...." I tried to take in what he had said, tried to push the guilt back to a place where I could deal with it another time. "Okay...listen, the reason I called is because Jessica asked me to stay til eleven instead of ten."

"Oh? Isn't she getting a little greedy?" There was finally a hint of annoyance in his voice and I actually felt good about that.

"Well, yeah...maybe. But the thing is, my mom is going on a date."

"Really? That's cool! Is it with that architect guy?"

"Yeah...hehe. I guess she really likes him. So it's not like I wanna stick around here any longer than I have to, but I think it would be nice to give my mom a little more time. But I was hoping you could stay too."

"Yeah, I understand. That's cool. My mom'll probably be okay with it. She's in a pretty decent mood. She thinks I was good all week."

"So she doesn't suspect anything about Tuesday?"

"No...." There was a long pause. "God, Perry," he moaned, finally lowering his voice to a clandestine whisper. "I'm such a sick motherfucker, but dude, I so wish it'd been me on my knees sucking you off, instead of Morgan."

"Oh man, me too!" I blurted. I felt my eyes getting watery.

"Hey, you're not going to burst into tears over there, are ya?" he chided, but I could hear the quiver in his own voice as well.

"No...no I'm not," I said, trying to convince myself with a deep, calming breath. There was a welcome pause in the conversation and I'm sure Jesse was also gathering his wits about him.

"I'll have to talk to Merissa. Even if her mom doesn't go for it, she can get a ride home with someone else, or even from her parents. It's no big deal. "

"Okay, good. I'm glad you'll be able to stay with me."

"I'll keep all those big bad girls off you, even if I have to beat up every one of 'em!"

"Hehe...I hope it doesn't come to that," I said, finding it more than a little difficult to stuff that guilt back where it wouldn't control my emotions.

"Please, please, Perry. Don't feel bad about...anything. Things'll work out, and I love you so much-"

"Is that your girlfriend?" I heard Miranda ask.

"Okay...gotta go," Jesse sighed wistfully. "I'll see ya later, okay?"

"Jesse loves Merissa; Jesse loves Merissa...." I heard Miranda chant teasingly.

"I love you; I love you so much," I whispered into my cell phone.

"Yeah. That's the best thing ever," he replied before hanging up.

While it was undeniably thrilling to hear Jesse express his love for me, I felt frustrated at not being able to tell him what had happened. A debilitating weariness overcame me that was nothing like the satisfyingly drowsy feeling I experienced after having a great orgasm. The thing was, I really did enjoy being with Jessica, and it wasn't that hard for me to imagine going even further with her. I had the disquieting thought that, if Jesse wasn't going to make me stop, then I'd have to be the one to break it off with Jessica...at some point. But what was that point? I just couldn't think of that now, standing here in Jessica's bedroom, surrounded by her furniture, her keepsakes, her scent, the same room where she had just seen me naked and played with my over-excited boyhood. I sighed and stuffed the phone into my pants' pocket.

After carefully combing my hair with my own flat brush, I headed back down the long corridor. Once downstairs, I decided not to go through the kitchen and meet up with Barbie and Kendall again, so I continued on past the staircase into another elegantly decorated corridor. There were Christmas garlands and festive decorations everywhere. I could hear the strains of an instrumental version of Sleigh Ride coming from a discreetly hidden sound system. I passed a large room behind open French doors dominated by a pool table and an enormous overhanging Tiffany lamp, also festively decorated for the season. Several professional looking people were bustling around inside, setting up small round tables throughout the room. They must be with the catering company and apparently, this was where we were going to eat. I passed a few more doors before the corridor opened into what was obviously the great room.

The first thing I noticed was the spectacular Christmas tree--it must've been at least fifteen feet tall and still didn't come close to touching the ceiling. It appeared to be fully decorated, and its wide evergreen branches were thick with glittering garlands, glass ornaments, big, colorful bows and ribbons, and twinkling white lights. An angel, dressed in extravagant, intricately embroidered robes, with open arms and wide spread wings was poised on top, but as gorgeous as it was, I knew my own sweet angel put that lavish ornament to shame.

There was a double wide staircase that swept down the middle of one end of the room, curving into two long balconies. Garlands, ribbons, and bows covered everything. In the middle of the high ceilinged room was a crystal chandelier that, with its rainbow glittering tear drop shards, needed no further decoration to blend in with the other holiday trappings. Tables and a large mantle were covered with miniature, lighted snow covered villages, one complete with a small train track and steam puffing engine.

"Perry! Doesn't he look handsome?!" Jessica announced to the room as she came trotting up. She leaned in and kissed me on the cheek. "Mmmmm...You smell so clean!" she crooned and then boldly kissed me on the lips. "You're wonderful!" It was a very odd feeling to stand here facing this ebullient young lady, both of us fully clothed, knowing that she had seen me naked less than an hour ago. I'm sure my cheeks turned a little red, but I wasn't really ashamed. It was nothing like the disturbed, confused feelings I had about my strange afternoon with Morgan. Jessica looked genuinely happy, and after the awkward position I had put her in on Saturday, I was glad for that. She was just standing there, looking me up and down with something that looked like admiration, rocking slightly back and forth on her heels.

"Hey, I am wearing clothes ya know," I whispered from a tight throat, trying to make a joke.

"Really? I hadn't noticed!" she giggled. Leaning in closely, she whispered in my ear. "How do you keep all that...stuff packed away down there? Isn't it like...distracting?"

People must have been wondering why I suddenly turned redder than a holly berry, but I tried to keep the phony smile plastered to my face.

"Don't be embarrassed. All those parts I saw today are beautiful. Every part of you is beautiful."

"I'm not beautiful," I protested through a firm jaw, trying to let anger push away my embarrassment.

"Really? Well, I'm not the only one who thinks so!" she giggled, looking around. That's when I noticed everyone in the room was staring at us. There was Katy of course, standing just a few respectable yards back. While she was dressed casually in a simple, Enya T-shirt, jeans and sneakers, her hair was clearly done up for the party later in the evening. Presumably, she would change clothes along with Jessica at some point. Hanging a large wreath on one of the tall, double front doors, were Mrs. Bainbridge and Mrs. Mulroney. They made an interesting and contrasting duo, with Mrs. Bainbridge tall and thin as a twig, with a deep tan, high cheekbones, an intricate, trendy hairdo and a definite air of sophistication, while Mrs. Mulroney was short and stout, with bushy red hair that seemed to cling wildly to her large head. She was dressed in a crocheted white sweater covered with bold Christmas icons and green slacks.

"I do believe I need to get in line!" she declared, leaving the wreath adjustments to Jessica's mom. She scampered over and stood patiently behind her daughter.

I wondered if I was having another one of those crazy 'girl' dreams when Jessica took a few steps out of the way and Katy shyly stepped in front of me, her normally rosy colored face flushed a bright red. Glancing apprehensively at Jessica, she then turned to me and hesitantly puckered her lips. Whoa! Was she going to kiss me right in front of her mother?

"Perry, don't be rude!" Jessica chided me, glancing at something over my head. That's when it finally dawned on me that I had unfortunately entered the room right under a sprig of mistletoe dangling from a shiny red and green ribbon.

"Oh...um...yeah," I stammered, and then closed the small distance between Katy and me and started to kiss her on the cheek. But she was fast, and with her lips already puckered, she was able to nail me before I could pull back.

"Why, Katherine Mulroney, you're brasher than your mother ever was!" her mom extolled in her light Irish brogue.

"As if!" Katy giggled. "Merry Christmas, Perry," she said sweetly and stepped out of the way.

Now Mrs. Mulroney herself came up, her chubby cheeks all aglow.

"Uh...Hi, Mrs. Mulroney...How've you-" Suddenly, my face was in her vise-like grip and her lips pressed against mine. Of course, she didn't french me but there was still no question in my mind that she was giving me more than a modest holiday peck. I didn't dare kiss back though and was relieved when she finally broke our lock. She patted both my cheeks playfully.

"Just as I thought--a true Irishman at heart!" she laughed, and scampered off giggling like a school girl.

"Um...where's your brother?" I asked, trying to hide my discomfort.

"Oh, I suppose he's out by the pool smoking his damn ciggies!" Jessica said dismissively.

"Jessica--language!" her mom scolded from across the room. It seemed like one of the prerequisites for motherhood was having exceptionally good hearing as well as that mysterious third eye in the back of the head.

Jessica cringed a little and gestured for Katy and me to move back further into the alcove through which I had just entered. She opened a door and stepped into what appeared to be a small and tidy office, dominated by a desk with a computer. There was also a couple of comfortable looking chairs, but no one sat down. She glanced up and down the hallway before closing the door behind us.

"I didn't tell Katy anything yet!" Jessica whispered conspiratorially.

"Tell me--please!" Katy moaned, putting one hand on Jessica and the other hand on my bare forearm as if it was the most natural thing to do. And I had to admit, I liked the way her soft hand felt on my skin.

"Gees, you guys are...are crazy or something!" I said, blushing furiously.

That prompted Katy to squeal in a barely subdued voice: "You did it?!"

Jessica giggled and then looked at me guiltily. "Hush, Katy Mulroney," Jessica scolded her friend lightly. "I'm sorry, Perry. I know you're shy. We honestly don't mean to embarrass you."

"Your cheeks are so red!" Katy pointed out helpfully, leaning over and flagrantly kissing one. "Jessy--I'm so jealous!"

What was she talking about? She had Morgan, for cryin' out loud! There was no way I could compete with Morgan from a purely physical point of view.

"You know that Katy likes you...a lot, right?" Jessica asked somberly.

"Well, I-"

"Of course I do! I told you, you knucklehead!" Katy chided, reminding me more and more of her brazen mother.

Perry," Jessica said seriously. "I tell you what. When you see Jesse tonight, you just take him aside at some point and tell him everything, okay?"

"What?!"

"Oh, I know you two are like peas in a pod. I even feel a little jealous sometimes because I think you open up to him more than you do to me."

I was about to protest, but she cut me off by touching a finger to my lips. "And that's okay. I know boys are more comfortable talking to other boys. I'm not complaining--honestly. I'm just saying that you should share our...our experience with him, and I'll share with Katy. We'll each tell our best friend and we'll be even, okay?"

It bothered me that Jessica could sense the depth of my relationship with Jesse. I wondered how much more she could see, and I wondered how much my own body language, or my big stupid eyes would give away in close quarters later this evening. I also knew she was right, both about the closeness of our relationship and the fact that I needed to tell him everything.

"Better yet, you could just show me!" Katy giggled.

"Um...I guess I'll go with Jessica's suggestion," I agreed reluctantly.

"I'm glad that's settled then," Jessica said in a business-like tone. "Let's go back out and help our moms. We have a lot to do and we still have to get ourselves ready."

"Is that what you're going to wear to the party?" Katy asked teasingly.

"I left the rest of my stuff upstairs," I explained, "but I thought it would be better not to get too dressed up, so I could be more helpful."

"Well, I think you're over dressed as it is," Katy declared with exaggerated frustration.

"I think he looks hot in that tight T," Jessica observed. "And they look great tucked into those belted dress slacks like that. I mean, look at his waist! Is that not totally hot or what?"

"These slacks do bring out the shape of his butt!" Katy added excitedly, shamelessly glancing behind me.

"What can I do to be helpful?" I asked rather loudly, shifting around so that my derriere was out of Katy's line of sight.

The girls exchanged more giggles over my obvious discomfort. So much for not trying to embarrass me! We stepped back into the hallway and I realized I was anxious to get back in range of Jessica's keen eared mom just as soon as possible.

"Actually Perry, would you be a dear?" Jessica asked. "We need two of the long tables brought right into the great room--where the Christmas tree is. We're going to set egg nog and punch and cookies and candies out right there, rather than in the kitchen. And my mom doesn't really want a bunch of kids traipsing through her precious dining room."

"Sure!" I replied both with enthusiasm and relief. My cheeks were going to burn right off my face if I stuck around these two much longer. And I wasn't too pleased with what was going on in my pants either. At least it wasn't pronounced enough to show...yet.

"Morgan said he'd try to come a little early," Katy noted helpfully.

"Yes, but we really need them now so we can put on the tablecloths and get everything laid out properly," Jessica reminded her. "They're in the pool house actually," she told me. "I'm sure Nobby is back there somewhere. He'll help you."

Oh, that was just perfect. I'm sure he'd just love to help me!

Jessica gave Katy a little nod of dismissal and Katy strolled back into the great room, turning once to give me a cheerful little wave. I waved back. As soon as she was out of sight, Jessica grabbed me around the waist and pulled me in, burying her face against my chest.

"Thank you, Perry," she said again in an emotional voice.

"For what?"

"For being the most beautiful boy I could ever imagine. It's too much to even think what the odds are--that you'd come to our tiny little school in tiny little Santa Corina, and that you'd be my boyfriend."

As if I'd had any choice in the matter! "So, you still think I'm okay, even after seeing me...er...you know?"

"Of course, silly," she assured me, still holding me, but straightening out so she could look me in the eye. "I don't think I'll ever see, in my entire life, a boy as perfect and handsome as you."

"I think you're getting carried away," I cautioned her. "Really, I'm nothing special to look at...down there. I'm pretty normal." I was tempted to tell her to have a look at Morgan, but right now, all I could think of was how weird it was going to be hanging with him tonight, knowing that he had seen me in such an embarrassing, helpless state, and had given in to his own ravenous sexual urges at my expense. I hoped that somehow it had all been worth it. Didn't some fool once declare that God turned everything to good?

"All right. If you say so," Jessica said in a sing songy way that indicated she really didn't want to argue with me. "Next time, when we get together, I'll share as well," she promised.

It seemed pretty clear what she meant by that. I would get to see her naked, and I had to admit, my dick twitched at the thought, especially after seeing her rub herself in that special place. I wondered if that was the happy button that Melissa had mentioned.

"I think you'll like it," she whispered uncertainly.

I brushed her silky smooth cheek. "I know I will." We kissed briefly, our tongues gently brushing one against the other before we parted. She gave me careful instructions on how to get to the backyard, and I concentrated on not getting lost as I wound my way through the maze of hallways and alcoves. Finally, I was standing in a beautiful, open ceilinged room, all done up in a tropical theme with white painted beams, potted palms, wicker-style furniture and ceiling fans, a long, fully stocked teakwood wet bar and plantation shutters. There was a couple of round table sets that suggested this might be used as a glorified breakfast nook or morning room. I could see the spacious backyard through the long row of French doors.

In the quickly dimming light of a mid-December afternoon, I could make out another wide patio outside with several sets of outdoor tables and chairs, each one complete with its own umbrella and gas torch heater. Past that, down a wide, but short flight of stairs, was the huge oval pool, already brilliantly lit from scattered yard lights and dramatically from below by lights submerged beneath the surface. I didn't think Jessica intended to take the party outside on a chilly evening like this, but it would be a spectacular venue once the weather warmed up a little. The pool was much larger than ours, and was beautifully landscaped on the far side, continuing the tropical theme with palms, exotic flowers, and a waterfall that first cascaded into a raised jacuzzi before spilling into the pool itself. I wouldn't mind going for a swim with Jessica in that. I hesitated as I saw Noah, sitting there with his back to the house, legs dangling in the pool. Was there even a slight chance that he would try to hurt me in some way? I just couldn't see it. If he really was that horny, he would have made his move up in the privacy of Jessica's bedroom where he'd caught me wearing nothing but a towel.

I opened one of the French doors and stepped outside, enjoying the cool late afternoon breeze on my bare arms. I could now see that Noah was indeed smoking. There was a small ashtray next to where he sat, along with his flip flops. A puff of dingy gray smoke swirled into the air. He turned his head disinterestedly when he heard the door close. He gave me a nod and beckoned me over, a cigarette dangling from his lips.

"You look very sexy in that T-shirt, Perry, and tucked into your trousers like that...mmmm...very nice."

I resisted the urge to push him into the pool. "Jessica would like us to bring in a couple of folding tables from the pool house," I said, trying to cover my unease by sounding business-like.

"Why don't you take off your shoes and roll up your cuffs?" he offered instead. "The water is heated. It's really very soothing." He kicked his legs and splashed a little water.

"Um...no thanks. We should probably just take care of this. Unless you don't want to help, that is." I figured I'd offer him a way out, and just wait for Morgan to show up.

"By all means, let's do the deed," he said with that irritating smirk. He crushed the rest of his cigarette in the ashtray and picked himself up. His cargo pants were rolled up to his knees and his slender calves were pale and covered in light colored hair. He ignored his flip flops and left a trail of wet footprints as he led me along the pool's edge.

Past the south end of the pool was a good sized Mediterranean style building with spackled white walls and a terra cotta tiled roof. The french doors were curtained, as were several other smaller windows. Noah let us in and switched on the lights. The pool house was as impressive as the rest of the Bainbridge estate and consisted of a large, high ceilinged room with several skylights interspersed with ceiling fans. There was a set of wicker furniture and another well stocked bar. I could see, through an open door, another smaller room that looked like a simple changing room with a bench against the wall. At the other end of the big room was another door, probably leading into a bathroom with a shower, if it was like other pool houses I had seen. Stacked against the wall opposite the bar were the long folding tables Jessica had requested.

"Can I get you anything?" he asked, gesturing to what looked like yet another well stocked wet bar.

"No thanks," I said.

"I'm not much of a drinker myself," he noted. "Tends to lower my inhibitions more than I like."

That was hard to believe! Still, I ignored his comment and went right for the tables, the bright green indoor/outdoor carpet feeling stiff under my sneakered feet. I waited for Noah to join me and get the other end. Instead, he plunked himself down in one of those round wicker chairs that was like a bean bag on a stand.

"Jessica is waiting for these tables," I reminded him.

He waved me off. "Come and have a seat, Perry. I think we have time for a little chat first."

"Well...I think she wanted them right away," I persisted.

"Why? Will the world come to a crashing halt if she doesn't get them immediately?" he asked with clear annoyance. He made no motion to get up. "Please, Perry--sit."

Reluctantly, I sat on the wicker sofa furthest from where he was sitting.

"Afraid I'll bite, hmm?"

I shrugged.

"I do apologize again for...intruding on you the way I did. It was rather crass and certainly not a way to make a good first impression--or perhaps it was!" he chuckled. "I do think it was worth it though," he winked.

A cold shudder went down my spine. "If I were a girl and you did something like that, you'd be in big trouble," I pointed out.

He snickered. "You're right about that. And for that matter, you certainly could go to Jessy, or even Mother, and tell them what happened. In that sense, you have me totally at a disadvantage."

"Well, I don't want to get you in trouble," I said.

"I know. I can see that you're not a mean or vengeful person by nature. But the truth is, you really do have me by the proverbial balls. Not only did I break into my kid sister's bedroom to catch a salacious glimpse of her fourteen year old boyfriend, but I also revealed something rather significant about myself that I haven't even shared with my own flesh and blood yet. So at the very least, I should hope you don't feel intimidated by me."

"Actually, I think I do," I admitted.

"Quite frankly, if I'd wanted to take advantage of you--sexually or otherwise--I would have done so by now. I do have a brownbelt in Tae Kwon Do, you know. It's practically de riguer for all us fags these days," he noted drily.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"If I seemed uncaring about your...situation. I didn't mean it that way."

"That's very enlightened of you, Perry. Who would've expected an eighth grade jock to be more understanding than most of the faculty at your very own alma mater, hmm?" He sighed nostalgically. "Good old H.T. What a stir we created there, me and Georgie..."

"You mean, you and George Rauch...?"

"Yes, we were an item, I suppose you would say," he smiled a little more sheepishly this time.

"I really like George," I told him.

"I know. Georgie told me all about your little encounter at the mall. I understand you are involved in some sort of situation with Arnold Hollister, hmm?"

"Uh...yeah...sort of."

"Well, take it from me, he is someone to avoid. You don't ever want to be caught alone with him if you can help it."

"But why? What's wrong with him? I don't even understand why he wants to hurt me!"

"Well, I don't know the entire story either. But I understand it had something to do with a rather horny wrestler, hmm?"

"Yeah, Fred Goreski." I suddenly found myself giving him a Cliffs Notes version of the drama at the rummage sale, including how Gary had come to my rescue, and shortly after, how Jesse had come to his rescue.

"Your friend Jesse sounds like a remarkable young man," he remarked. "How fortunate you are to have a friend like that."

"He's totally cool," I assured him, I said, realizing I felt extremely uncomfortable talking about Jesse with Noah Bainbridge.

"So one of Goreski's crew actually turned on him? That must have cost the lad dearly. Come to think of it, I do have a vague recollection of this boy, Van Driesen. Tall basketball person, rather dark and shaggy, right?"

"Yeah, and he did get beat up some later," I noted sadly, "which I feel terrible about, but luckily for him, his girlfriend is Mario Hernandez's sister, so I think they went easy on him."

"So Freddie 'Ball Crusher' Goreski is the new king of idiots over there now, hmm? And he's gathered all the losers and wannabe's around him. Seems like there's always somebody like him to make life unpleasant."

I just nodded in agreement.

"I do have to say this for him though--he has great taste in young boys."

"That's gross."

"Hmmm? Yes, I suppose it is. And for what it's worth, I'm glad you resisted, and I'm glad you were spared that ordeal." He gave me a careful look over. "Seeing you now, I can understand better why George felt so strongly about you. And for what it's worth, I truly hope that no harm befalls you, Perry. And yet...." His voice trailed off.

"What?"

"Is it not the way of things, that the innocents are corrupted by the vulgar? That the vile trample the comely?"

"If you mean younger kids getting picked on by older kids, I guess it always happens--but these guys, they seem like more than just ordinary bullies."

"Yes, well, Arnold Hollister, he is indeed--what's the phrase?--a piece of work."

"Tell me. Tell me about you and George and Arnie Hollister," I pleaded anxiously.

"Well, it is a rather long and involved tale for the brief time we have now," Noah hedged. He gave me one of his odder stares. "I must admit, I find it very distracting to be in a room alone with you."

"Then we should just take the tables in," I suggested quickly.

"Well, I do give myself more credit than that. I shan't be jumping your bones or anything like that--at least not without your permission. I'm simply stupified by how incredibly attractive you are."

"You sure aren't afraid to say what's on your mind."

"No, I suppose I'm not!" he said, laughing through his nose. "And yet, ironically, amongst my own small cadre of intimates, I'm known more as the intellectual rationalist than as a horny romantic. In fact, I'm rather shy when approaching a potential...date."

"You don't seem very shy to me."

"No, I suppose not, from your point of view. But the fact that it's unlikely that we will cross paths again anytime soon also has served to embolden me. You are, after all, about to ship out for the east coast, hmmm?"

"New York."

"Yes, to stay with your father and his...mate."

"Yeah. They're getting married," I said unenthusiastically.

"Well, if your father is anywhere near the looker you are-"

"I hate looking like my dad!" I spat, feeling such a surge of anger that I actually rose to my feet.

"That's very interesting," Noah commented calmly. "You blame your father for giving you your good looks?"

"He left us, you know--for this other woman. And he hurt my mom--alot! If you just knew her, and what a good person she is...and-and everytime she looks at me I remind her of him and it must be torture for her," I finished miserably, surprised at how suddenly all those powerful emotions had welled up.

"That is truly an unfortunate situation, Perry," Noah said, sounding a little like he actually cared. He pulled his legs up and sat Indian style on the wide chair. "Here I am, admiring your flawless adolescent beauty, assuming that your parents have bequeathed to you an incredible gift, and yet from your perspective, it's more of a curse."

Curse was right.

"So when people are attracted to you because of your physical appearance, you actually feel guilty because of the connection you make with your estranged parents."

"I guess...."

"You know, Perry...I could make you feel very good right now...if you let me."

"Are you hitting on me?"

Noah laughed that raspy, throaty cigarette laugh. "Yes, I suppose we must call a spade a spade. But I'm also offering you something of a gift, a few moments of ecstatic pleasure for your keeping mum about my little secret."

"Don't worry. I won't tell Jessica," I told him plainly. "But I think you should."

"You may be right," he said thoughtfully. "It's just that, when I first got up the nerve to come out to my parents, Jessy was barely twelve; she still seemed nothing more than a wide-eyed child. Of course, she's blossomed magnificently since then, and even I can see the beauty that she's growing into. Thank God she takes after Mother's side of the family!" he laughed through his nose.

He sighed, and his smug little smile melted away. "I have to admit, it would be awkward at this point to make such a revelation. I don't know how she'd take it."

"It's not right to keep it from her--especially when you've told your family--and everyone at Holy Trinity."

"I never said I told everyone at school about my sexual orientation. Believe it or not, Georgie and I did exercise some degree of discretion. We weren't total fools, although things did get rather complicated toward the end-"

"George Rauch! Tell me about George-please!" I begged, momentarily forgetting that this college guy had just been hitting on me.

Instead of answering me directly, that creepy little smile again appeared on his narrow face. "You know, there's no shame in having yourself serviced by a willing--a more than willing--male. In fact, being of the same gender gives me the advantage of knowing to a very intimate degree exactly what turns you--or any other boy--on."

"You just want to grab a cheap thrill for yourself," I pointed out irritably, thinking that Noah Bainbridge was one of the most selfishly arrogant people I had ever met, gay or otherwise.

"Again, we must call a spade a spade, but in my defense, it wouldn't be a cheap thrill. On the contrary, it would be a rare and exquisite experience for me, pleasuring such a beautiful young body. And additionally, you'd be amazed just how good I can make you feel."

"You're not getting in my pants!" I assured him more brazenly than I really felt, placing my hand threateningly over the pocket holding my cellphone.

"As I said, I wouldn't force myself on you...Still, there are things I could do for you that wouldn't necessarily involve my going into those dark and forbidden areas that everyone is so uptight about. There are other parts of the male anatomy that are nearly as sensitive as the ones we all know about from song and legend. The nipples, the tummy, the feet. I could do wondrous things with those beautiful feet of yours, Perry Thompson."

"What?"

"Please, Perry--sit. Relax for a few moments."

"I don't want to relax--with you," I pointed out bluntly. "I wanna get those tables inside for Jessica. She says there's lots to do yet and she still needs to get herself cleaned up and stuff before the party."

"My goodness, you have a one track mind."

"Me? What about you?"

"Touche`!" he smiled self effacingly. "You're right. I suppose we should get the job done, and I should give up any hope of indulging my illicit and immoral fantasies." He started to get up.

"Wait," I said, reluctantly sitting back down on the very edge of the sofa. "I do want to hear about George Rauch...and you."

"Yes, you must want it very badly if you're willing to put up with a flagrant cad like myself." He waited for me to respond, but I just stared at him with a neutral expression. "Very well then," he said, clearing the phlegm from his throat in a very unpleasant manner. "We must first turn the clock back about ten years, when my parents first signed me up for soccer--the local branch of AYSO to be precise. I was somewhat reluctant about the whole endeavor. You may find this hard to believe, but at the time, I was rather more the indoors type," he noted drily.

I found his sarcasm grating, but then he quickly went on to describe how he and George Rauch had been assigned to the same team. Noah had been a complete novice while George already had developed substantial athletic prowess. They found themselves spending time practicing together and going to each other's houses and eventually, becoming close friends despite the significant differences in their personalities.

"My passion was for reading--granted, it wasn't all Tolstoi or Faulkner in the fourth grade. At that age, I was more into the fantastical works of Tolkien, Alexander, Asimov and so forth. And Georgie, well he was a born athlete I suppose, and I admired him for it. Even when I first met him he was the tallest boy on the team and it seemed that he just kept growing and growing. Good Heavens, how tall is he now? Six foot six, six foot seven?"

"I think so," I agreed.

"While he helped me hone my athletic skills, I frequently helped him out in the academic arena. It was actually a good balance of reciprocity. After our first season together, we became such close friends, that Georgie, thanks partially to his improving grades, was actually able to persuade his parents to send him to St. Bonnie's, and that must have taken some doing since Mr. Rauch was even back then less than enamored with the Catholic Church."

That would explain why I rarely saw them at Mass, or even school functions. Still, I didn't say anything, just nodding my head to indicate that I was following along.

"Well, that was wonderful for us, and from the 4th grade on, we were inseparable. Now during that time, I don't think either one of us gave much consideration as to what our sexual orientation was going to be. Of course we saw each other sans clothing on numerous occasions, whether in locker rooms, changing for a swim, getting ready for bed, or what have you. Nonetheless, it was obvious that Georgie was fantastically well endowed--even as a youngster. Still, at that time, it was only a source of...envy, I suppose you'd say, and nothing more."

It still seemed hard to pair those two in my mind, even though it turned out they had grown up together as best friends. There had to be more to Noah Bainbridge than what I had so far witnessed. I couldn't imagine George Rauch doing anything as disgusting as what Noah had done today. I wondered if maybe I was seeing Jessica's brother at his worst. I wanted to ask him how many other under age boys he had solicited lately, but realized that would make me sound as crass as he did.

"And yes, somewhere toward the end of our stint at St. Bonnie's, we both learned the glories of masturbation. How 'bout you, Perry?" he asked with a piercing gaze. " Do you do the wicked deed? Spank the monkey? Bop the baloney? Buff the banana?"

I felt myself turning red with embarrassment. "Gees...."

"I take that as a definite and colorful 'yes.' My God, what a vision that must be. I'd give anything-"

"Gees, Noah! Do you have to say things like that? I thought you were gonna tell me about you and George!" I snapped irritably, trying to cover my own discomfort at his brazen sexual insinuations. Buff the banana?

"Yes...well...eventually, we moved on to Holy Trinity, and by then, it was quite clear that I would never be half the athlete he was, no matter how much skill and effort he put into coaching me. I was a decent swimmer but never seriously competed, and really, soccer always was my best game. It was Arthur's too, incidentally. Georgie of course, could do it all, but ultimately, his passion proved to be football."

Noah paused, fidgeting around a bit in his chair. "I'm regretting not finishing that last ciggie," he noted uncomfortably. "I know it's a dirty habit, but it has a very calming affect on me. Are you enjoying the story so far?"

"It's kinda hard to believe you and Georgie were best friends for so many years. I mean, you seem so different."

Noah laughed his throaty, smoke-colored laugh. "Yes, well, the truth is, we always were very different, cut from a different cloth. But when we were younger, it didn't seem to matter nearly as much as it did later on, and sadly, in the end, I suppose it did have something to do with our ultimate dissolution as a...couple."

Noah sighed and I could tell he was feeling the emotional weight of his own past. Almost as if to distract himself, he seemed to refocus on the present, and he started scanning me again in a way that I was getting all too familiar with.

"Um...if this is hard for you, maybe we should just forget about it. You could write me an email or something," I suggested uneasily.

"The internet is a wonderful invention for tossing words and ideas around the world, but it is painfully lacking in the important aspects of true communication--body language, inflection, nuance, eye contact. I think if I'm going to share this tale with you, it needs to be done in person."

"Okay," I concurred.

"May I ask you one small favor?" he asked, and his question sounded surprisingly sincere.

"Um, well, what is it?" I asked with a great deal of caution.

"Speaking of body language!" he laughed. "But I digress, both from the riveting story of my youth, and the small and innocuous request I wanted to make." He paused expectantly.

"Go on...." I felt myself stiffen, trying my best not to anticipate what he had in mind.

"I was wondering if you would do me the favor of removing your footwear?" he asked, and there was a hint of discomfort in his tone.

"What?"

"Your shoes and socks," he clarified needlessly.

"What for?"

"Isn't it always preferable to leave the feet unshod when relaxing?"

"I'm not very relaxed," I informed him. "And why would you care, anyway?"

"Again, to call a spade a spade, I find your smooth, young feet, gracefully curving arches, and long straight toes highly erotic."

"So you want to get off, looking at my feet?" I asked with obvious distaste.

He laughed uncomfortably. "I would indeed be getting a significant amount of sexual pleasure, but I would stop short of beating off in front of you." He smiled devilishly and it was a little disturbing how well that suited his features. "I do still have a modicum of dignity left, and my own bedroom, you know."

"You're really weird," I declared. "And creepy." I started to get up.

"It was the summer before our sophomore year that Georgie and I became lovers," he announced quietly.

George Rauch and Noah Bainbridge had been lovers? That was enough to stop me in my tracks.

"Yes, in retrospect, it all happened rather quickly," he noted. "You see, that summer, we both entered a junior lifeguard program at the YMCA. Most of the classes took place at the local pool, but for the last two classes, we went on field trips to various local beaches, the first one being La Jolla Shores. We went through our drills with our class and then were given several hours free time to spend at the beach. It was the strangest thing, and hard to really describe. But somehow it just dawned on me that day, seeing Georgie like that, tall and tanned, those broad shoulders, that hard and hairy chest, that washboard stomach...and always with that amazing, effortless smile. And his package...so incredibly tantalizing in his red swim trunks. My first thought was to find some secluded nook or outbuilding, and take turns jacking each other off. Somehow, I sensed he was thinking the same thing as I. The amazing thing was, neither one of us ever actually made the suggestion out loud. We just roamed the beach, casually moving further and further away from the rest of the group, and eventually wound our way to Black Beach--have you ever been?"

I shook my head.

"It's truly spectacular, Perry. Towering cliffs, rugged trails, no screaming children or fat ladies under umbrellas, just real beach people--surfers, wind surfers, a hang glider or two. Rumor has it that it was once a favorite haven of nudists, but we didn't spot any that day. What we did find, eventually, was a secluded place behind some rocks, just above the high tide line. And when we looked at each other, we were both tenting to such an extreme, I'm surprised we didn't burst the seams of our trunks."

"Gees...."

"Yes, in a way, it was quite romantic, with the background of the crashing waves and the smell of the salt water in the air, but believe me, getting sand in your shorts is no picnic, regardless."

I realized that as curious as I was about this unusual pairing and the ensuing relationship, I didn't really want to hear graphic descriptions of their sexual activities. I had everything I needed with Jesse, and listening to someone else talking like that was just...gross. "You don't need to go into all that detail," I informed him.

Noah looked at me with puzzlement in his eyes, and then laughed his harsh, phlegmy laugh. "Of course! What was I thinking? I forget your youth, and the fact that you're a straight shooter. I suppose, somewhere in my convoluted thought patterns, I had hoped that if you weren't at least bi-curious, you'd be aroused enough to...Haha!" I think he laughed to cover his embarrassment. "Suffice it to say, we went way beyond slapping each other's monkeys that day. And after that, it seemed like we became insatiably horny, and it was within a couple of weeks of our first experiment, that we were making passionate, sweaty love." Noah stopped and sighed. "I think I need another ciggie," he said uneasily. "Perhaps the rest of the story should wait for another time."

"Please, I want to hear what happened when you guys came out, and why you're not together any more."

If my question sounded pointed or suspicious, I couldn't tell from Noah's expression. Instead, he looked at me like someone who was painfully uncomfortable in his own skin. I felt a twinge of sympathy, and toed off my sneakers, offering him a full view of my silly, bright red socks. His eyes widened and a broad, tight lipped smile spread across his droopy countenance.

"Thank you," he said with quiet gratitude. "I don't suppose...?"

I pulled my knees up and rested my heels on the edge of the sofa. "So you guys really fell in love?" I asked, idly curling my toes.

"Hmm? Oh...." Noah released a little snort. "Well, there's a discussion for the ages. Was it love? Infatuation? Lust? All of the above? We were already best friends, and at the time, it seemed to be a physical manifestation of a relationship we had already had for a long time running."

"Were you guys freaked out about being gay?"

This seemed to finally leave Noah speechless, at least for a bit. For once he didn't look at me in that distastefully lustful way as he tried to form his thoughts. "Hmm, again, at the time, I don't think it's something that was high on our agenda. I suppose on some level, we both acknowledged it, but you know, Perry, having grown up together, having the relationship start in a natural, platonic sort of way, it almost seemed like it...evolved. Granted, the day at the beach was certainly a quantum leap forward." He stopped and stared at my red sock feet, poking out from the droopy cuffs of my dark gray dress pants. It was almost as if he was drawing strength.

"Well, needless to say, the rest of that summer was pure bliss. We both got work at the local Y as junior life guards, and I suppose during those long hours of watching people of every age, but mostly the young--and mostly boys for that matter, I came to the inevitable conclusion that I really was gay. I suppose I had my moments of quiet consternation over that conclusion, but really, there was no hair pulling or deep soul searching involved. In all likelihood I already knew, subconsciously, and now it had simply come to the attention of my conscious mind as well. I knew I was supposed to get excited seeing the wet bosoms and sensuous curves of the young ladies, but I found my attention focusing much more on the broad, muscular chests and wet, clinging swim suits of the young men. I became intrigued by imagining what their packages looked like under their wet trunks or Speedos, and I made certain to visit the locker room for inspections as often as I could justify them without attracting undue suspicion."

"And George, did he accept it too?"

"Georgie was different--of course. He was born and bred a jock--something he took pride in and deservedly so, I might add. I think it took him longer to come to terms. It was during our sophomore year that we had finally satiated our sexual lust enough that we could actually sit and discuss our situation with some perspective. Georgie desperately wanted to believe that it was a passing thing, simply a different way for two friends to express their feelings for one another, but I think even then he realized it was more than that. Still, we were very careful about keeping our physical relationship a secret. It was already well known that we were close friends, despite the apparent differences in our nature, and so people took no notice when we paired off together for school, or social activities. We even did some heterosexual dating!" Noah smiled and his cheeks seemed to flush slightly. "That was simply surreal, Perry. I mean, imagine forcing yourself to go on a date with someone you knew--a good friend perhaps--but not someone you're physically attracted to--say someone in your class like Eugene Rauch, or the Kipner boy perhaps. Imagine forcing yourself to flirt with those boys simply for appearance's sake. If you can picture that, you would have some idea of how uncomfortable it was for us. Fortunately, we did most of our dating together, and were able to support and cover for each other as we bungled our way through those ridiculous charades."

I pictured in my mind Jesse, Merissa, Jessica and myself, going to a movie, or to the mall, or to the beach together...yeah, definitely the beach. I knew whose swim suit I'd be looking at all day!

"Those red socks look incredibly delicious," he noted hesitantly, as if he was actually afraid I would respond angrily to his remarks.

But I guessed he meant it as a compliment, and I tried to keep the anger from my voice. "Huh?...Oh, those. My mom packed them. Guess she wanted me to be in the Christmas Spirit."

"And I suppose you're wearing those delightful silk boxers with the little Christmas Trees embroidered on them, hmm?"

"You looked in my overnight bag?"

He gave me an exaggerated wink. "Wonderful."

"So no one found out you guys were gay?" I asked, trying to steer the conversation back to what was interesting while trying to shrug off the uncomfortable stares.

"At that point, no. Like I said, we were careful and believe me, we were very discreet. I know Georgie is no longer afraid to declare himself part of the homosexual community, and while I don't generally go around advertising my sexual orientation to complete strangers--present company excepted, of course--I also don't go to any great pains to hide it. Fortunately, a university campus is a much less stifling environment than a high school campus."

I took heart in that, knowing that someday, Jesse and I would be able to come out without a horrible Scarlet Letter being plastered to our foreheads. Sure, there would still be those that refused to accept us for who we were, but what would it matter then? How many people had the great fortune to find their one and only soul mate so early in life, if ever?

"That summer, having graduated to fully-rated life guards, we tried to find a beach where they would hire us both. And thus we ended up at Mission Bay Park, although assigned to separate beaches: me at Bonita Cove, and Georgie at Crown Point. Still, by then I had my license and was able to drive us back and forth every day. It was almost an hour during the afternoon traffic. But it was nice. We were still doing all those wonderful things that one associates with a passionate and loving relationship, but we were also spending time talking. I think that summer, Georgie finally made peace with himself about who and what he was, and it got to the point where we were seriously considering our future together. And along with that came the inevitable discussion about coming out--if we should do it at all, and if so, to whom. As I said, we didn't make a school wide announcement and...oh my, I so want to see your toes, Perry."

"Huh?" I had gotten so caught up in his story and the hopeful feeling it gave me about my relationship with Jesse, that I had forgotten that we were sitting in the Bainbridge pool house and that Jessica was waiting for those damn tables.

Noah got up and was suddenly kneeling right in front of me, his eyes focused on my feet. I had my knees pulled up, and only my toes stuck out from the wide cuffs of my dress slacks. "Allow me," he said, and began peeling one of my socks down. I started to squirm away, feeling a sense of repugnance that this arrogant, lustful young man was touching me, even if it was only my ankle. Only the fact that he had been George's best friend kept me from screaming.

"I wonder...." he mumbled as I struggled, and began scratching my sole through the thin fabric of my sock.

"Stop!" I gasped, as uncontrollable laughter erupted from my throat. He held my leg in place and despite my floundering, finally got the sock off and began tickling my bare sole.

"No! Noah! Stop!" But he was already clawing at my other sock when the door opened.

"Good Heavens!"

It was Jessica, and she was standing their wide eyed, one hand on her breast. "Perry..." she uttered, trying to take in the bizarre scene before her. "You were taking so long and I couldn't wait any more because I have to go upstairs and get ready and... Good Heavens, what's going on in here?" she asked in a high pitched, nearly hysterical voice.

I could feel my cheeks burning with embarrassment, even though I was really no more than a victim of her brother's uncontrollable lust.

"Why, Jessy darling, I'm merely executing my duty as your older brother."

"What are you talking about?" she asked, looking at me with some concern, probably because my face was so flushed both from laughing and from being caught in such a ridiculous situation.

"You see," he explained calmly, while still holding onto my ankle, "I felt that I should give young Perry a proper interrogation."

"Interrogation? What ever are you talking about?"

I was about to interrupt, but I realized I didn't know what to say. I didn't feel it was my place to tell Jessica that her brother was gay. Even though I was definitely angry at him, and in all honesty didn't really like him, I still couldn't turn his life upside down simply because he wanted to have a look at my stupid feet.

"When I met Perry, and saw how much more handsome he is than in the pictures you sent me, I immediately had to wonder about his background."

"Background?" Jessica asked suspiciously, still flustered, but her voice slowly returning to its normal pitch.

"You see, my dear Jessy, I happen to know, having been one myself, that good looking boys are notoriously unfaithful--especially at this age. I simply felt it was my duty to find out as much as I could about your boyfriend's other dalliances."

"Dalliances? For Heaven's Sake, Nobby. What are you talking about?" Now Jessica was going from frightened and confused to stern and demanding--much more like her usual herself!

"I wanted to make sure that he wasn't seeing anyone else. I wouldn't want to see your heart crushed by a libidinous young Lothario. You see, we were just sitting here sharing our experiences in the field of love and romance--isn't that so, Perry?" he asked.

"Well...."

"And I felt that perhaps he was holding something back. As you can see, I was already barefoot when we entered, and I suppose Perry wished to make himself comfortable as well, and had thus removed his sneakers. When I became suspicious that he might be holding out on some pertinent information, I decided to take the initiative and, well,...tickle it out of him!" He smiled sheepishly and danced his fingers across my sole once more.

A loud and embarrassing guffaw erupted from my throat and I jerked my leg from his grasp.

"Oh...Nobby!" Jessica exclaimed, confused both by the situation she had stumbled on and her brother's convoluted explanation. "Perry, are you okay?" she asked, finally approaching us.

I nodded, feeling certain that my face was now as red as my silk boxers. I found my discarded sock and pulled it back on and quickly stuffed my feet back into my Etnies.

"I just don't know what to think," she said, but now there was a hesitant, slightly bemused smile on her face. "I mean, it's so sweet of you, Nobby, to be looking out for me like that, but I already know about Perry's history. He had a girlfriend back in La Jolla, and they tried to make it work when he moved here, but it just didn't. Isn't that so, Perry?"

"Um...yeah," I said, getting unsteadily to my feet and slowly backing toward the door.

"Ah, so that's what you were holding back!" Noah announced like Inspector Poirot at the successful conclusion of a long and convoluted murder case. He picked himself up, pushing the cuffs of his cargo pants back down.

"So your interrogation wasn't necessary, you silly," Jessica concluded. "Besides, I trust Perry. He's not like that, not a Lothario."

"Perhaps not. I must admit, I found him to be remarkably enlightened for an 8th grade jock."

"I told you he's not a jock, and besides, what about your bestest bestest friend?" she asked accusingly, still with a slight smile on her face indicating that she was no longer taking any of this too seriously.

"You mean Georgie? Was he a jock?" Noah asked in a very amusingly puzzled manner.

"Nobby and Georgie Rauch--Gene's brother--were like this in high school," Jessica informed me, crossing her fingers to demonstrate the closeness of their relationship. "They were like the Odd Couple," she snickered.

"Kewl," I said, still backing toward the door. "Maybe we should get back inside."

"But the tables, you silly!" she pointed out. "Remember why I sent you out here in the first place?" She shook her head and sighed in an exaggerated manner. "Boys!" she said, rolling her eyes heavenward.

"Yes, those tables are coming right up," Noah declared. "C'mon, Perry. Lend us a hand."

"You shouldn't be doing that in your bare feet," Jessica said, scolding her brother.

"Oh, well, you see, I was just enjoying dipping my toes in the pool when Perry came out, and I guess, in my enthusiasm to be of assistance, I left my footwear behind."

"Yes, I saw," Jessica said pointedly. "Flip flops and ashtray!"

"Yes...well, a reprehensible habit I know," he admitted sheepishly. "Let me get my sandals, and I'll be right back to help," he said, quickly slipping by me and out the door.

"Did he hurt you?"

I shook my head.

"I'm so sorry, Perry," she said, rubbing her hands against my chest.

"It's not your fault your brother's crazy," I said, trying to sound facetious even though I was having trouble keeping my voice from quivering.

"He's not crazy," Jessica said with a sweet smile. "When you have money, you're eccentric, not crazy, dahlink!" she said in an exaggerated high society accent as she wrapped her arms around me. "It looks like two of us know your secret now," she whispered in my ear.

I stiffened, my heart pounding in my chest thinking in my confused state that she had somehow discovered that Jesse and I were lovers. "S-secret?" I stuttered.

"Yes," she smiled mischievously. Suddenly her fingers began dancing around my armpits and ribs. I pulled away and blocked her with my arms as I began to snicker. "Perry's hopelessly ticklish!"

"So, is the floor show about to begin?" Noah asked, returning to the pool house, flip flops once again on his feet.

Jessica started to pull away and seemed about to scold her brother for catching her in an act of such silliness, but instead, suddenly turned and gave me a big kiss square on the lips. We parted with an audible smack. "That's all you get!" she teased, sticking her tongue out at her brother as she slipped past. "No more dawdling now!" she scolded over her shoulder in her high society accent, before leaving the two of us together again--alone.

"I can't believe I'm standing here, jealous of my kid sister!" Noah uttered in amazement. He and I just stood there awkwardly for a few long moments.

"Well, that was truly embarrassing," he finally admitted, scratching his head. "Once again I find myself apologizing to you, Perry. Obviously, I need to get out more," he chuckled, then looked at me uncomfortably. "You could have told her," he said quietly.

"Let's just move these tables," I said. I felt a little bad for Noah getting caught in such a ridiculous situation, but had to admit that his cover story had been pretty clever. He nodded quietly, and I felt a small twinge of sympathy. We picked up the ends of one of the long tables and began hobbling back towards the pool house entrance.

"I guess I shouldn't of gotten so upset," I offered.

"About what?" Noah asked, taking the backward position as we worked our way outside.

"You know, about letting you see my feet."

"My fault entirely! Of course, it was totally inappropriate of me--inexcusable...." He paused. "Your foot was so soft," he whispered.

"It's just a stupid foot!" I pointed out, my level of irritation quickly rising again.

"Perhaps to you. They do, after all, follow you around everywhere." When he saw that his little joke wasn't going over well, the smile slowly vanished from his face. "I am truly sorry, and as part of my penance, I intend to send Georgie a detailed email confession. He's very fond of you and he'll probably hate me for the things I said and did today."

"Don't do that," I said, as we passed the pool and carefully worked our way up the short flight of steps to the patio area. "It's embarrassing and...stuff."

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about. You've been nothing but a gentleman, my dear Perry, and extremely tolerant of my imprudent behavior. I am the one who has acted crassly all afternoon. I honestly don't know what got into me. I mean, breaking into my own sister's room to catch a salacious glimpse of her fourteen year old boyfriend...Do you think I'm sick?" he asked with what sounded like genuine concern.

"I...I don't know," I offered, taking his question unrhetorically. "I don't think I'm anything special to look at, but then, everyone has different tastes."

"Apparently, my sister and I share something in common there."

"Well, I guess I can't say anything about you being like gay and stuff, cuz that's none of my business," I explained quietly, "but I don't think it's right to sorta push yourself on someone who's like...not interested, ya know?"

"Out of the mouths of babes," Noah said thoughtfully.

"I'm not a babe!"

"Haha! I didn't mean it that way," he said with a sudden smile. "I was referring to Psalm 8: Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings hast thou ordained strength because of thine enemies, that thou mightest still the enemy and the avenger."

"Oh...."

"What I meant was, you speak wisely, young Perry. And incidentally, I'm very sorry to inform you that you are, indeed, a babe. I imagine you'll be forced to stand under the mistletoe all night long as the young ladies queue up around the block for their turn."

"It's not like that," I protested. "There are alot better looking guys in our class than me." One in particular.

"Really? I'll have to see that with my own eyes," he noted skeptically.

Yeah, you do that, I thought to myself. Try messing with Jesse's feet and see what happens.

"Did you and George have a...a bad break up?" I asked, wanting to get off the subject of 'me.'

We set the table down as Noah opened one of the french doors. "Yes and no," he said. "There were a number of things that happened in our junior and senior years that tested our relationship, not the least of which was Arnold Mathias Hollister."

We got the table inside and we again put the table down so Noah could close the door. "Strangely, it was George who was most adamant about telling his parents about us. You see, while we were both insatiably horny young lovers, I would have to say that Georgie had a passion for love making that rivaled his passion for football."

It was a wonderful feeling to know that George had been so happy in high school. And if it had been with Noah Bainbridge, so what? While he wasn't my idea of a great friend, let alone boyfriend, he and George had found a way, early on, to make it work for them. It had blossomed from a mutually beneficial friendship of a nerd and a jock, to a full out passionate high school relationship. "Cool," I said.

"You approve?" Noah asked with some puzzlement. "I must admit, the fact that a young, straight Catholic boy would be so open minded about a homosexual relationship, is rather perplexing."

I realized I was smiling. "I really like George. He helped me out of a bad spot and I thought it was really cool that he was so open about who he was and how he felt."

"Yes, as I said, he became instantly enamored of you as well, and now I know why."

"Well, I don't know about that, but I think we really did become friends that day, in that short amount of time. He really is something special, and I'm just glad that you guys had such a happy relationship."

Noah just nodded, still in some state of bewilderment. "Thank you, Perry. There really was something special between us," he declared wistfully, "and it's a shame, in a way, that it had to end."

"But why did it have to end?"

"People move on," he explained enigmatically. "High school is only a beginning, Perry, though at the time I know it seems different."

We picked up the table and began carrying it cautiously through the corridors of the Bainbridge mansion.

"It was toward the end of our junior year that Georgie simply couldn't hold it in anymore," Noah continued in a subdued tone. "And I must admit, it was frustrating to have to constantly hide our relationship from everyone around us--especially our families, since we did most of our activities in one or another of our homes. Actually, the first to really catch on was Georgie's younger brother-"

"Gene?!"

"Yes. Is he a friend of yours?"

"Gene is great. He and George are so much alike, such nice people, always happy and calm about stuff."

"Well, I'm afraid neither one of them was very happy or calm that day. You see, Eugene walked in on us after school. We had carelessly forgotten to lock the door to Georgie's bedroom, and when he innocently popped in to ask if the sandwich downstairs was available for consumption, the two of us were in a rather...compromising situation."

"Oh, gross--I mean, gees. I guess that was embarrassing, huh?"

"To say the least. And Eugene was quite--how do you say it?--freaked out. Georgie's first response was to become quite indignant, and he wanted to frighten the poor boy into keeping quiet, but fortunately, cooler heads prevailed," he noted as he tapped his temple. "We ended up sitting down and having a nice long chat. It was really quite fascinating trying to explain to a stunned and bewildered 6th grade boy how his older brother, whom he greatly admired, and his brother's best friend--whom I don't think he really cared for--were actually lovers."

Noah suddenly stopped and set his end of the table down. My end started to get really heavy, so I set it down as well. We were in the middle of a quiet corridor which I knew would connect with the wider hallway that went past the rec room and thus to the great room. While there were no speakers here, I could dimly hear the strains of "Do You Hear What I Hear" wafting through the air.

"I suppose Eugene was really the catalyst that pushed Georgie into announcing our relationship to his parents."

"How did that go?"

"Are you familiar with the Rauchs?" he asked.

"Not really. I don't see them at church, maybe some football games and school stuff, but I never actually talked to them or anything except to say hi."

"Well, the two brothers definitely get their bright and cheerful natures from their mother. Mrs. Rauch always had a smile on her face and a kind word on her lips. I think she was quite taken aback by his announcement, but to her credit, she remained very calm, and within a week, there was no doubt that she had come to accept the facts of the situation. Now Mr. Rauch, he was quite a different story. He's obviously where the boys get their athletic prowess and drive. Don't get me wrong, he's a very good man with strong and simple values--salt of the earth, I suppose you might say. For some reason that was never clear to me, he has a rather open disdain for the Catholic Church even though he was raised as a Catholic himself. Anyway, to distill a rather long and unpleasant story, he didn't take well to Georgie's announcement."

"Were you there when he talked to them?"

"No. Not that I wouldn't have been, given the opportunity," he added quickly. "I would've stood with Georgie against the whole town, Dr. Dobson, Jerry Falwell, George Dubaya,and the Pope himself if I had been given a chance, but he insisted that it was something he wanted to deal with on his own."

When the day would finally come for me to tell my mom the Truth, I knew I wanted Jesse by my side. I knew that I would stand before her, reach over and grab Jesse's hand and squeeze it tight as I forced the Truth to come out of my mouth. Even though it caused my chest to tighten with fear, I also had a sense of what a relief it would be to finally speak those words: Mom, Jesse and I are gay and we love each other very much.

"He was brave, huh?"

"Yes, indeed. But Mr. Rauch would have none of it. He forbade Georgie to ever see me again, and not only that, he personally came to my house to have a talk with my parents. Well, it was quite a mess, and it made all our lives extremely difficult. While my parents chose to live in a certain amount of denial for some time, I did have the whole-hearted support of my brother. Unfortunately, he was mostly away at UCSB, and busy performing in the summer, so it wasn't quite the face-to-face support I really needed."

"And no one told Jessica?"

Noah shook his head. "Honestly, at the time it seemed highly unlikely that she would be any more receptive than my parents."

"Gene was able to deal with it," I pointed out. "Maybe you don't give Jessica enough credit."

"Again, perhaps you're right. It wasn't even something that was high on my agenda until...until I saw you. But in time, my parents came to accept my nature and our relationship. I really don't give them the credit they deserve," he noted guiltily.

"How does Arnie Hollister fit in to all of this?"

"He's a twisted person, Perry," Noah said with deadly earnest. "You might think that I was audacious and crude in the way I approached you today, but Hollister-"

My heart nearly leapt into my throat as Morgan came strolling casually down the hall. It was a shock to see him wearing a gray suit coat, white, button down shirt, fairly tasteful red and green striped tie, baggy dress slacks, and shiny black loafers.

"Oh...hey, Nobby! I didn't know you were in town," Morgan said with cautious surprise. "Wazzup?"

"Good afternoon, young Mr. Kipner--or should I say evening? It gets dark so early these days. May I say, it's a little shocking to see you out of your characteristic sports regalia."

Morgan shrugged. "Not my choice," he snorted.

"Hey," I said, suddenly feeling awkward in Morgan's presence. I glanced at my watch and was surprised that it was already after five. While I had been dreading spending a long and interminable afternoon with Jessica, the time had actually gone by much more quickly than I would have thought possible. "We were just bringing this table in for the party."

"Yeah, Jessica was getting a bit antsy," Morgan confirmed."But she and Katy just went up to get ready, and I said I'd come out and see what the hold up was."

"I suppose it's my fault," Noah announced. "I'm afraid I've been talking Perry's ear off, talking about the good old days at jolly St. Bonnie's, and all the excitement with the basketball team and so on. In fact, I understand congratulations are in order. Perry insists that the majority of the credit for the team's success goes to your athletic prowess and strong leadership."

Funny, we had never actually had that conversation, although it is what I would've said.

Morgan shrugged, but couldn't help but let a little pride show through. "Perry had alot to do with it too. He's a great player. He doesn't give himself enough credit."

"That much is certain," Noah agreed readily. "I'll tell you what," he said. "To expedite this matter, why don't the two of you set this table up in the great room? Meanwhile, I'll return to the poolhouse and bring the other table along shortly."

"You can't carry it by yourself," I pointed out.

"Well, I can get a good start. Perhaps Perry could come back and lend me a hand once you have the first one set up properly."

"Sounds like a plan," Morgan acknowledged, "but it'd make more sense for me to lend a hand since it looks like Perry still has some getting ready to do before the party."

"I don't mind," I jumped in quickly. I really did want to hear the rest of the story, especially the part about Arnie Hollister.

So we quickly set up the table, much to the joy of Mrs. Bainbridge and Mrs. Mulroney. Morgan was then put to work hanging some final decorations around the rec room and I hurried off to the poolhouse.

Noah was standing by the pool, frantically puffing away. He quickly extinguished his cigarette when he saw me coming.

"We'd better hurry," I said, walking right past him and straight to the poolhouse.

"I want to ask you one last thing," Noah said, standing in the doorway.

My heart started pounding forcefully in my chest. I thought we'd gotten past all this.

"It occurred to me, when I mentioned the possible scenario under the mistletoe later this evening, that due to the unfortunate constraints of our oh-so-modern society, I won't be able to participate--at least not in the way I'd like to. So I was hoping that we could do it here, in this private setting, thus avoiding any potential scandal."

"What are you saying?" I asked, fully aware that I could dash out and save myself with relative ease if necessary. I knew Morgan was around and he wouldn't stand by and let someone mess with me.

"I'd like my chance under the mistletoe, Perry," he said, slowly approaching me.

"You wanna kiss me?" I asked, trying unsuccessfully to hide my disgust.

He nodded and smiled. Unlike some of his other facial expressions, it was a strangely sweet smile and I realized it was something of an effort for someone like Noah Bainbridge to allow his true emotions to show through. And then I realized that his mask of smugness was one way to conceal the secret of his sexuality.

"I...dunno...."

"I wouldn't even ask, except for the fact that you seemed so accepting of my relationship with Georgie Rauch. There is more to you than just a pretty face, Perry. There is a thoughtful, open mind in there as well, and you are a credit to young men everywhere."

I could easily say no and my feeling was that he would let it go, but that felt so...mean. Despite the things he had said and done, he was Jessica's older brother and he had shared a very personal story with me at my insistence. Besides, could it be any worse than being kissed on the lips by Mrs. Mulroney?

"Um...well...like on the cheek?" I asked nervously.

He shook his head. "I don't think that's how it's traditionally done," he said quietly.

"But that would be weird," I couldn't help but point out.

"I'm not asking that you reciprocate."

"You'll tell me what happened with Arnie Hollister?" I bargained.

"As best I can."

I nodded, and waited for him to close the distance between us. He had to stoop slightly to bring us in line. Then he tilted his head so that his large nose and his lips touched me at the same time. I immediately smelled the acrid odor of cigarettes on his breath, and crinkled my face in disgust. But he either didn't notice or didn't care. I could feel the stubble on his upper lip as he pressed his lips against mine. After the initial contact, he started to apply some pressure, and then began chewing lightly at my mouth as he wrapped his bigger lips more and more around my own. I felt his hand come up along my back and push me firmly against his own slender body and I could feel his heart beating rapidly. He moaned and I felt it in his chest. I was actually getting to the point where I was getting light-headed from lack of air when he finally pulled away.

We stood staring at each other for several long moments, both of us breathing deeply. Noah's eyes were watery.

"Um...Merry Christmas and...Happy New Year," I offered self-consciously.

"Well, it's certainly been a wonderful December the nineteenth!" he exclaimed. "Georgie will be so jealous," he pointed out with a thin smile. Then he licked his lips.

"Don't tell him," I pleaded.

"But why not? I have no doubt that he'd make the same request if he were here. At least I can share the experience with him, hmm?"

"It's super embarrassing," I said quietly.

"No Perry, it's not. Again, you were very brave. After everything I've done and said today, I wouldn't have been surprised if you'd simply run from the room after hearing my request. Instead, you stood there and..." he smiled that sly grin again, "took it like a man. Well done."

I didn't say anything as I felt my cheeks burn. Again, more staring. "We should bring that table in," I repeated, interrupting the uncomfortable silence.

"Yes, of course. But slowly. I have a story to finish."

It turned out, unsurprisingly, that Arnie Hollister was something of a loser at school. His extremely pushy parents insisted that he sign up for football every year, but he spent most of his time as a bench warmer. Even then, he managed to get in trouble with the coach over various infractions, and George, having such a big and caring heart, had tried to help the sophomore out, by training with him after hours.

"Everyone deserves a chance, Georgie would say." Noah shrugged.

We managed to drag the table to the door of the poolhouse when Noah set his end down, indicating that he wanted to finish his tale before we got out in the open. I could understand that and set my end down as well. We could always pick it up quickly if anyone decided to come back and check on our progress.

"It turned out Hollister could be quite diligent when he wanted to be. The private practice sessions continued well after the season was over, and even into the spring of our junior year. While Georgie focused on track, I was on the spring soccer team. Fortune was with us, and our team was number one in our division. It was after we won our first playoff that Georgie met me behind the fieldhouse at H.T. We were both exhilarated of course, and even though in hindsight it was a reckless blunder on our part, we embraced and had ourselves a good long kiss. That in itself was wonderful, as it was always so cathartic to be able to express our affection for each other somewhere outside our own bedrooms." He smiled fondly. "Even this place saw quite a bit of action," he remarked, his eyes taking in the large room in which we were standing. "It was especially fun in here because we could have a drink or two and really loosen up."

"What happened at the game?" I asked nervously.

"As you might expect, someone caught us in the act. As fate would have it, it was Arnold Hollister, and to be quite fair, I don't think he was intentionally spying on us. He had simply seen Georgie disappear behind the fieldhouse and had eventually followed. Needless to say, all three of us were quite stunned. I could feel the belligerence and panic arise immediately in Georgie, and he began to chase the younger boy across the field. Hollister took off like a frightened jack rabbit. Of course, that didn't look quite right, and after twenty or thirty yards, Georgie fell back and Hollister disappeared into the dispersing crowd."

He paused and pursed his lips. "I suppose we should get this table inside," he said reluctantly.

I nodded and we headed out past the pool.

"That was the first time you were ever caught?" I asked.

"As far as we know--besides Eugene, of course."

"So, did Hollister want to talk to you guys about what he saw?"

"Not exactly," Noah said with obvious distaste. He looked around, and seeing the coast was clear, again set his end of the table down. I did the same.

"It seems that Hollister was under a lot of pressure from his parents to get on the varsity football team his junior year. So he pretty much insisted that Georgie do whatever it took to get him on the team."

"Blackmail?"

"In a way. According to Georgie, Hollister had become a half way decent player by the end of his sophomore year and if he could just keep himself out of trouble, Georgie didn't think he'd have a problem making the cut. And of course, it turned out that Georgie was chosen team captain in his senior year, so that pretty much sealed the deal. Unfortunately, Hollister couldn't keep his nose clean. He missed practices, showed up late for games, sometimes came to practices reeking of alcohol, and was even caught smoking pot in the locker room. Georgie was put in a very awkward postion, constantly trying to defend him to the coach. But he managed somehow, and they got through the season. They made it to the playoffs that year, but lost the championship by one field goal."

"Gees, that's too bad. Just like our football team this year."

"While Georgie was never one to put winning above good sportsmanship, he was very disappointed at coming so close, only to lose in the final moments of the game. But that is the nature of competitive sports. Now this is where things took a very unfortunate turn," Noah said, lowering his voice so that I could barely hear him over the distant hum of the pool filter.

"I often volunteered as an assistant librarian after school for Sister Patrice while Georgie did locker room duty, which mostly consisted of sitting in the coach's office doing his homework, picking the occasional towel up off the floor, or making sure all the various balls and other equipment were returned by those that had signed them out for the day. Well, it just so happened one day in late February, that the library had to be closed after a particularly heavy downpour because of some leakage in the ceiling, so I decided to go down to the locker room and keep Georgie company. I was still in the habit of helping him with his homework as much as my own heavy schedule allowed. Unfortunately, the scene I stumbled upon was enough to leave me speechless and in utter shock."

"What happened?"

Noah glanced around nervously again, the light coming from beneath the surface of the pool creating the unsettling effect that the skin on his face was shifting both in color and texture. "I burst into the coach's office without preamble, having decided on my way down, that I wasn't so much interested in homework as perhaps making out with my boyfriend. But it turned out Georgie already had company." Noah abruptly stopped speaking. It was as if the batteries had suddenly been pulled out of his voice box. His expression was hard to read in the shimmering, dancing light of the reflecting water.

He moved from his end of the table toward mine, sliding his fingers along the large slab to keep it from tipping over. "Georgie was on his knees with Arnold Hollister's dick in his mouth."

"Oh no-not George!"

Noah nodded sullenly. "I left immediately of course, and jumped in my car and drove for...I don't know, a very long time. It began to rain again and I kept having this vision of going into a skid and plowing uncontrollably into the cars on either side of me."

I shook my head. It was hard to believe that George Rauch, the sweet hearted giant who had so gallantly come to my rescue, would betray his friend and lover of so many years, especially for one of the very same scum buckets that he had saved me from at the mall. It seemed to me, when I looked back on that memorable day after Thanksgiving, that there had been no love lost between the older Rauch and the clownishly creepy Hollister.

"But you didn't...didn't get hurt?"

"No, not physically anyway. But it was quite a blow nevertheless, excuse the pun. As it turned out, Hollister had been, according to Georgie's explanation, continuing to sexually blackmail my friend and lover over what he had seen at the soccer championship the previous spring. Apparently, he had threatened to tell the whole team that he had observed Georgie and me kissing behind the fieldhouse. The thing is, Georgie'd never given a satisfactory explanation for why he had chased Hollister half way across the field, a spectacle witnessed by a hundred or more witnesses, so such a revelation would have fed the gossip mills quite nicely."

"That's sad," I noted as we stood there at the bottom of the stairs.

"And I must confess something, Perry," he said, looking at me quite guiltily. "I was never quite convinced that Georgie had been coerced into that act of fellatio-and whatever had come before it."

"But why? You knew he loved you!" I said with a passion that surprised even me.

Noah cringed and glanced around and up toward the house.

"Oops, sorry," I apologized sheepishly.

"This is indeed an awkward conversation to be having right here at this moment," he admitted. "And the very fact that I am having it with my sister's 8th grade boyfriend seems in itself somewhat...surreal." He lifted the table and we began to climb up the wide, but short flight of stairs. This brought us to the outside patio, which we quickly crossed. He glanced in through the french doors before continuing.

"You have to remember that Georgie and Hollister had been spending a lot of time together during our junior year."

"But George was just trying to help the guy out," I said defensively.

"Perhaps," he said, uncertainly. "One of the unfortunate consequences of being in love is that you're always afraid you're going to lose it--at least, that's the way I felt."

I nodded in understanding as an unbidden picture of Jason Tarentino popped into my head.

"Anyway, shortly after catching him in the act, and in a fit of jealous zeal, I cornered Hollister one day and gave him a piece of my mind. I told him to leave Georgie alone or else!"

"And did that work?" I asked skeptically.

Noah shook his head dismally. "First, he was quite belligerent. He gleefully informed me that he and Georgie had been giving each other head since the end of our junior year, and that Georgie enjoyed their activities far more than he did spending time with me. Granted, I am the first to admit that my head is sometimes far too large for my body, but still, I found it hard to believe that Georgie would sincerely fall for such a loser. Hollister represented everything Georgie loathed. At that point, I became quite enraged. I don't remember ever being so unconditionally angry at anyone before or since. In fact I did something that, in retrospect, I'm rather ashamed of, as we are always told never to use our skills in such a way; I used my martial arts techniques to get him in a very lethal choke hold. He literally couldn't breath, and I could have crushed his larynx with the simplest of motions. I recall actually getting pleasure from seeing the way his eyes bulged from their sockets. His face turned first a pasty white and then a somewhat alarmingly bluish hue. Finally I released him and he dropped to his knees, gasping for breath. Then he seemed to get very...contrite and Gollum-like, and promised me he would stop." Noah paused to gather his thoughts, and a look of weariness caused his long face to droop even more than usual. "But then rumors started spreading through the school about Georgie and me-that we were indeed gay lovers."

"Hollister?"

"I have no doubt. It was one of the most difficult times of our lives."

"But you had each other," I pointed out.

Noah shrugged. "Yes and no. Unfortunately, Hollister had managed to plant the seeds of doubt in my mind, and I was never fully convinced that Georgie hadn't been a somewhat willing partner in the tryst that I interrupted in the coach's office."

"So, that was the end of you guys?" I asked disappointedly.

"No...not quite. We did manage to repair our relationship, somewhat. But the gossip in the corridors of H.T. just got worse and worse until Georgie was actually having a hard time with his fellow athletes, and even some of the faculty. They were beginning to believe the rumors, and it forced us to be extremely cautious. Really, we hardly dared to even look at each other in school anymore, and due to our busy schedules, got together at each other's houses much less frequently."

I shook my head. Was that the future that lay in store for Jesse and me? As much as it frightened me, I just couldn't believe it. Our love was stronger than that. I would never let somebody like Arnie Hollister or a slick operator like Jason Tarentino get between us-never!

"And it wasn't just the business with Hollister and the growing schism between us that weighed on his mind. While Georgie was unquestionably a top tier athlete and the best quarterback H.T. had seen in many years, the spring track team started to lose confidence in him, and that in turn, caused Georgie to lose confidence in himself. There had been such high expectations that Georgie was going to win a division championship for the Warriors his senior year, and when that didn't happen, it was a major disappointment to everyone and only served to increase the atmosphere of homophobia surrounding him at that point."

"That Hollister is such a bastard!" I said angrily, realizing that my brief encounter with him at the mall had been nothing compared to what he had done to George and Noah. I realized that George Rauch must have been showing incredible restraint that day, encountering Hollister and Hernandez like that, intimidating a stupid and witless 8th grader. Knowing what I did now, it was a wonder that George hadn't wiped the mall floor with that red-sneakered clown and his leather-jacketed cohort.

It was obvious that Noah had been deeply affected by the subject of our conversation, and we stood there in the chilly December dusk, exchanging helpless glances. Finally, he sighed. "We'd better head inside before-" He stopped as we saw the shadowy figure of Morgan appear in the hallway beyond the darkened breakfast room.

Morgan opened the door. "You guys need a little extra man power?" he asked with a friendly smirk.

"Actually, what I need is a goddamn cigarette!" Noah said rather desperately, gesturing for Morgan to take hold of his end of the table. Apparently this was going to be the end of our discussion, even though it still wasn't entirely clear why Georgie and Noah had split up at the end of high school.

The lanky college lad walked past me quickly, but I was still able to catch a glimpse of the pain etched into his face. I understood now that this was still a very fresh wound for Noah, and that satisfying the curiosity of a nosy 8th grader wasn't his top priority at the moment. But when he got to the bottom of the stairs, he turned his back to the pool and looked up at me.

"Forgive my rudeness, Perry. Perhaps we'll run into each other again before the end of the evening," he noted quietly. He managed half an uneasy smile, and then turned and headed toward the darkened pool house.