People's perceptions within society has always been something that's interested me.

It is quite funny actually, without even meaning too, we develop these pre conceived ideas about how life and our place in society should look. We get this from our parents, social norms within our culture, social trends within the world around us, our peers, the media and the way in which this vast array of information that hits us as we grow up is interpreted and received by those that have the biggest influence over us.

One of these pre conceptions that has always fascinated me is how men and women perceive themselves and their place in the world in regards to women in a straight setting, or in regards to their partners within a gay/lesbian environment.

Men feel the need to appear macho, tough, deemed to be strong and capable of protecting themselves and their kin. At least this is the impression you get when you look at the traditional view of what a man should be like.

Now we like to think of ourselves as modern, and adaptable, and the image of a man certainly has changed in some ways. I mean, men's grooming products is an industry rapidly catching up with the female make up business in its range of products, and procedures available to help a man look his best for as long as possible.

In terms of fashion trends, it is acceptable for men to be viewed as pretty for the first time in our existence. The whole idea of a man being soft or effeminate was something that for the large part has been something that men have shied away from for fear of being branded as 'queer' or 'soft' or 'bent'.

Men enjoyed this dominance within society that has meant that they have endured this perception of status that I am not certain that man deserves.

I mean, let me try be honest for a moment.

Since a young age, I've always been a boy's boy! To explain that, I've always been one of those guys that really didn't want to be viewed by friends, family or the public at large as a soft touch. Yet the truth is, I am really quite a sensitive guy. I mean hell, simply poke me in the ribs, and I'll jump the Brooklin Bridge, and make it look like child's play doing it. Now there, I've just admitted one of my biggest weak spots. I literally HATE being tickled. It stems from two older brothers who always thought it was highly amusing pinning me down and tickling me till I couldn't breathe. However they took it too far one day, and it ended up with the most embarrassing accidental discharge in the nether regions that left me very wet and red faced, my brothers "ewwing" and performing like a choice pair of school girls, and my mom mad as hell.

Now there is something that a "Man" would never admit to have had an accident doing.

But, that is just ridiculous, as it is a funny story, and one that really I shouldn't have to be embarrassed sharing with people. It is part of growing up, and the reason that I am really rather impartial to a jab in the ribs, or tickling of any sort. But, the idea to some men, that they should be able to admit to a moment of weakness is tantamount to treason. It is just something "Men" do not do.

The Yettie is also a big softy when it comes to snakes. Put one of those creepy things in front of me and I am likely to pass out in very rapid style. In fact it is something that I have done on two occasions, and I've even taken to running out of a reptile house in a mad panic as a young boy holding a snake for the first time panicked as it began to move over his shoulders, and began running in my direction with the damn thing! Needless to say, the whole group we'd gone on tour with knew that the Yettie had a "thing" about snakes!

Do these fears make me any less of a man? Um, no I don't think so. I think fear is a part of life. It is something that we all deal with for one reason or another. To show it, to admit it, or to accept that it is something you live with does not make you any less of a person. Plus, let me be frank, I have far greater fears if I am completely honest. A fear of a long, scaly creature that could possibly bite me with painful consequences is hardly life changing.

Fears like a fear of rejection are far more damaging to us as individuals than fears of physical harm. Psychological fears that damage and affect our self esteem and our value process are things to worry or be cautious of far more than appearing to not be a strong and macho man able to be the ever dominant protector of our domain. It is these internal fears that are more important to learn to control and overcome.

We are so concious of how people regard us. It is such a big thing to be rejected and to be honest when it happens a few times, especially in situations where we have allowed some kind of feelings take root within our imagination, a hope that maybe this person or that person might feel the same way, and see in us all that we see in them. Building up our hopes to have them crushed when we are turned down is a bitter pill to swallow, and if it happens often enough the dent it has on our self esteem can be long lasting and hugely detrimental.

These are the fears we should be able to talk about, be honest about, and accept as a part of our characteristics as people. We are all flawed in some way. We all have stupid things to deal with, things we hate about ourselves. Hell we are our own worst enemy when it comes to finding fault. Sometimes we really need to be able to talk about these things to be given any kind of a chance of overcoming them. So next time you wonder to yourself what it is that you fear, find it, accept it, and try if you can not to bury it. You are human, and if you can be strong enough to be able to admit and be open about your weaknesses, maybe, just maybe it is a way of taking some step towards overcoming that fear.

We are not inadequate We are valuable, precious individuals. It may work out that the people we hope will see this truth, are not the ones that realise it, but life has a really strange way of knowing who is right and who is wrong for us, and we should learn to trust that a little more. If is not meant to be, casting yourself into a darkness, a depression, a rut is not going to change it. If anything, it is only going to make it harder to over come the next thing that knocks us.

Learning to accept that we are not going to be important to every person we meet, will help us understand that our time and energy is precious, and if someone is not interested in it, move on and make friends with someone new. Guard your precious assets, the fire inside your soul, the smile on your face, the friendly, cheerful nature of your character. These are things that will carry you much further than riches and popularity and fame. It is ok to be human, it is good to be scared, and it is great to be able to learn from the things we face in life. Learn to grow, learn to be better, learn to be humble and good. These are the important things in life.

Thought for today - "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas A Edison.