It has been quiet in here.

I suppose that is majorly my fault. I could say nothing has been happening, but that is a lie. A lot of things have happened in the 8 weeks since I have written anything round here... The spring semester came to a close, I only managed a 3.15 GPA for the entire semester, so I dunno what to think about it, good on one hand but meh I could do better. I should do better. Doing so wouldn't take much more effort on my part.

Im a year away from transfering to the University. This is both exciting and scary at the same time, but Im looking forward to it more than anything. Mostly because it is all there is to look forward to pretty much. That sounds bad I guess, but its what it is.

I hate coming online anymore. I dunno why it happened but everything feels so strained. Its weird to see a list of people I used to talk with on a daily basis. I'd like to talk to them, but I dont want to "bother" them, and some days its seems like that is all I do is bother them. So I stayed away for awhile trying to avoid all this awkwardness and loaded silences.

It didnt work so well for the most part, conversations are strained, they end unexpectedly... and I end up feeling like the bad guy. I made some choices and for better or worse they were my choices. Not the choices of another person or what not.

I dunno where Im going with this, I guess I sometimes just dont feel all that welcome here anymore, and I know its has nothing to do with anyone here, its something inside me. Its dumb, I go through phases where Im all into something. I work hard at it and what not, but there comes a time when something else catches my attention and I move in that direction.

Im trying not to let that happen here. Im trying to get rid of this disconnect I feel, but it seems like Im the only one who is trying.

Again this is an issue of my own design. I just don't know if I've burned all those bridges.