Raijen

Wow, I just sat here and read through all of this story (thus far). Is there any more to it? Very good work! I like it.

Hmmm.... Very nicely written first chapter. Grabs the attention.

I've heard bits and pieces about the flooding in Queensland, but as usual the media circus in the US has covered it up quickly with images of cross-eyed possums and Sarah Palin's face. I hope that things get patched up soon, and that the death toll stops where it is. It's scary crazy that something that big could happen so quickly, and it's gotta be traumatic for the people involved.

Dating... well... I haven't really been on a date in quite a while... I took a year off from dating, and that turned into two... I tried dating a couple of guys this Autumn, but that didn't work out. It's funny though... I've gotten to a point where I think a guy has to earn a date with me. I know that sounds kinda arrogant, it's just that I've gone through waaaay too many guys to be indiscriminate in my choices now. Then again... it may just be a defense mechanism. It's difficult to tell at times.

I made the mistake of serial monogamy... Not knocking monogamy (because it's my personal ideal), but a combination of various factors (low self-esteem, lack of self-identity, repressed anger) can cause a person to do some pretty messed up things (like sitting outside, underneath a window to listen in on a conversation in a foreign language you only halfway understand...... I still can't believe I ever got to that point in crazy...). It isn't the biggest mistake, I don't think, especially when compared to some of the other stories I've read on this thread, but it's definitely one that eventually can cause issues. I've had to take almost three years off from dating to find myself, and even though I think I've met someone that might be worth the time, the past still kinda haunts at times...

Or else he/she is just resigned to his/her fate...

I really liked this prose poetry. The intellectualizing of desire and dominance, and the way that dominance was found to be a way to deal with the rejection of what was ultimately wanted... I think you hit upon a nerve, in a way.

I was toward the female side of the middle... Didn't really pay attention to numbers, since they don't mean much to me. Lol. I always felt as though I was a blend of male/female, and this test just kinda confirmed it. Neat.

I use a variation of my middle name (Ryan). It's basically a tie in to some stories I'm writing, but only in name.