MJ85
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Everything posted by MJ85
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Pretty straightforward, though that's probably to be expected from here on out. And can we get a Game Over for the losing would-be assassin?
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Death Above and Death Below
MJ85 commented on C James's story chapter in Death Above and Death Below
Guess since everyone made it on the ground safely, that makes this bad, bad fiction for the untrained Brandon pulling it off! -
Yeah...you would've had to get pretty creative with this to not end it in a cliffhanger. One odd thing, though: Jon's said to be 10 when 9/11 happened, and he's 21 when this takes place... *does quick math* That would place this story in 2012, not in 2007/08 when it was written!
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Talk about opening Act 4 with a bang... Obviously the final Act will be the most intense, but you get the sense that it's also going to be quite dark as well.
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Well...we're seeing things tying themselves together, as Act 3 comes to a close. And is it just me, or has it been way too easy for The Scar to hide the bombs?
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Sooo...these first few chapters have been great in that yay, they're pretty much happy as they can be together given what they've been through. But it's not really until this chapter that something more than that has started to take shape. If Griffin's missing and "apparently" Barrington's not responsible...I dunno, is it possible that an evil sentient being could be on the loose? No one really comes to mind as far as who could be responsible.
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Is anyone watching this? It's HBO's dramedy series about a group of gay friends living in San Francisco. First season ends next Sunday, last week it was renewed for a second.
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Damn, everybody picks on Eric...well Eric picks on everybody right back, too! The cross-over means we get a side view of much of this chapter, which is interesting.
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Well, Lump's not quite come full circle just yet...but it's this chapter that gives a pretty strong hint that he ultimately will before we're done. We also get danger, in more than one form, dangled in front of us - yet again, you and your teases...
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Ick...a pretty rough chapter. And something about yet another paparazzi interloping, and the random guest snooping a photo...it's like much more detail is spent on the dark sides of fame in this story while the bright sides either come with dark prices or just get glossed over.
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Basically everything in this chapter played out very...deliberately. Not a big fan of deliberately-executed plot developments...
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A very simple, yet thematical chapter indeed. (Wait. Is thematical a word? Eh...it is now. )
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Brandon: "If you'd talked it over with us first, we could have made a better video. We know the song a lot better than you do; we wrote it." A sentiment like this was probably overdue by this point - particularly with Helen's set-up for the video in the previous chapter, she's taken to being more of a puppeteer with the four guys as puppets, at times. Eric: "You can keep your cliffs, Steve; that’s your thing, not mine." The road to the end begins somewhere around this point, though as we're still on tour, we're still in Act 3...
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Somebody might want to tell Helen The Pop Spurner that a rock band in a jungle-themed video only wearing loincloths, a young rock band at that...isn't too likely to stay confined to the rock world for very long.
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Eric's perfect ability to read people actually gets pretty annoying by this point...though that said, this is one case where we already know he's right.
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Poor, poor Lump - left hanging at the edge of life's cliff...or would it be knocking at Death's Door? Either one fits, I suppose. Something about this chapter makes it seem short, despite the multiple check-ins we get here (which is ironic, given its being titled "Checkout Time").
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And so begins Act 3. And I'll echo Eric and Chase with that ending: "Uh oh...!"
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!!!!! DUN-DUN-DUN......and there's the big reveal! But only you would stick that in the middle of a chapter. Even without that, though, this was easily loads more fun than the previous chapter, LOL. But something in that previous chapter now sounds a lot more worrisome...
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Long, and other than Eric's prodding Wilde and Steve to go talk, not much happening either. And Eric's pushy way of making things happen gets a bit irritating by now...
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This would be a very literal cliffhanger, if the ending had been a little shorter. What could have been, instead got stampeded by a little too much information: "Barbra hesitated to say the name, knowing what the loss of who, she thought, was in spite of everything likely Helen’s favorite of the three brothers, would do to her." Gee...I wonder who that's supposed to refer to? *Shocking*, but we know a little too much for this to hold up.
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So, the side plot thickens...or does it? With how it's dangled in front of readers by all the tells...
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With a title like "Secrets and Lies", it foreshadowed potential nastiness ahead - and it certainly didn't disappoint in that regard. Yuck.
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There's something about this chapter that makes it seem like it would play out better as a series of scenes, like in a TV episode or a movie - but in written word, it seems kind of uneven. What does help is that this story easily lends itself to being able to mentally visualize everything. One other problem, though, is the big ugly tell right at the end of the chapter. Don't think we should've known that his big singing moment would threaten to come back to haunt him so quickly...
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Well gee, you have a way of really drawing/dragging things out, don't you?
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Is it just me or does this chapter feel like the closing of an Act 1 and beginning of Act 2? That's the vibe I get from this one.
