Hi everyone. Hope you're doing well. I, for the record, am not.
I really can't say what it is exactly, but I'm getting closer and closer to telling someone about how serious things have gotten for me. Hospitalization is looking like a reality. If I could just drop everything and take care of myself the way I need to, the way I should, then I would. But work and school and other...stuff keeps me from doing it. That, plus the very serious cost it would take. I can't even deal with that right now. Well that's a half-truth. I think the stigma of actually having to be hospitalized keeps me from doing it. People knowing. I'm a pretty private person and so for everyone to know about me in that way, knowing how severely depressed I am and...I don't even know. Peopole knowing the truth of the whole situation bothers me.
Staying sober is becoming more and more of a challenge. I am still (sober I mean) so...yay, I suppose.
A day at a time?
A nice phrase I think.
Sorry for the rambling. Its been a bad few...I don't even know what.