🕯️Dewey, Suem, & Howe — demonic attorneys at law 🕯️
“Lost your soul? Or just want to lose someone else’s?
We don’t rest until you’re hexed — er, vexed — no, compensated.
From breach of contract to breach of the infernal seal, our billable hours are eternal — but our loopholes are hellishly creative.
Dewey, Suem, & Howe
We’ll sue ‘em, screw ‘em, and re-shoe ‘em in brimstone.
First consultation is free. Your immortal soul is the retainer.
⚠️ Not liable for accidental damnation, cursed office supplies, or your ex’s mysterious combustion.”