Zuri

Sounds like the next big American sitcom 🤔 Well, chapter 18 isn't posted yet, so there's still time to change it to make you right. Or would it be wrong? You could change it to: Rocky brings a gun to school, shoots Bruce's sidekick, shoots Bruce in the arm, so he looses much blood … oh, wait, I think, I have a déjà vu 🤔

At least, I can't be laid off because I charge too much ^^

So, you need someone to clean up the mess, your fingers created 👍

Well, as much as Manny needs a nanny, Lee needs an editor 😉 Anything else would make me jobless 😉

I'll do my best not to delay posting

From a storytelling perspective this might end up in a "who is patient zero of evil?" infinite loop with each person in this being the reason somebody else got "evil". While that is an interesting topic, this led to prequel after prequel of explaining in some franchises. Also the question "what makes a person evil" is fascinating but the approach that people causing trauma because they have been traumatized kinda takes the accountability away, especially in case of a child. Well, this is because Manny from chapter 1 is essentially switched out for a more family-friendly Manny in chapter 3. Character growth starts only then.

Wow, that's a lot to process here. But having gay friends probably helped Rocky to get to the conclusion that not every gay person is alike. That might be the first time, they really talk back 🤔 That's actually a common misconception. So it's good, the therapist brought that up. I was recently part of a discussion where someone asked why so many sexual predators are gay, having me pointing out a couple fallacies of the questioner. I didn't like Bruce and I like him even less after this chapter, but there's one thing to emphasize: There's a difference between Bruce and Rocky's tennis coach, and I don't mean Bruce going through with it and the tennis coach being caught by Bass. What I mean, is, that the tennis coach is an adult who is fully aware of what he's doing while Bruce was eleven(?) back then. Sure, Bruce has to learn that what he did was wrong and how it traumatized Rocky but the fault is also—if not primarily—with the parents at that age.

Look at you: Turning the comments section into a dating app. That got suggestive real quick 😂

What! So Rocky's not straight Looking forward to this. Too bad. Aren't there enough gays already? 😜 This! 👍

It's not about the act. That's not my point. Them not talking about sex specifically is absolutely fine. But they don't really give him anything in terms of really helpful answers. He arrives questioning, and leaves questioning with fwuit references in his head. Manny and Bass were, afraid of touching the hot potato, so vague, they refrained from giving him an even remotely definitive answer. Sure, nobody can say about anybody else, they are gay, but that doesn't necessarily mean you can't help another person finding their identity. That's what they might have wanted to say, but that would have also been a possible logical interpretation.

This is one thing, thinking back to my own inner and outer coming-out, I absolutely hated: People not believing me, I was gay but instead confused or too young or what ever. I know, sometimes, we realize, we have to update our labels, but I don't like to constantly assume, one is wrong just because one might find better ways of describing oneself in the future. Doing so kinda feels condescending. You wouldn't constantly tell heterosexual teens that they shouldn't get too comfortable with their straight label or heterosexual adults that they are still too young if the thought of upgrading their label still hasn't crossed their minds. I still have one acquaintance, who probably still thinks, I'm just questioning, because that was her last comment on the subject back then, and we have only seen each other once since then. Returning to the story, Bobby wanted to talk to Manny and Bass specifically, because his parents didn't believe him. And what did he get? Manny and Bass not believing him, either. Too bad. And there's a second thing, I also heard here in Germany, I think, doesn't work that well in practice. You wouldn't run around telling straight people to finally fuck someone of their own gender because otherwise they could hardly claim to be straight. See, if you tell me as an asexual to fuck every gender known to humankind before I can really say I'm asexual, what kind of horrible journey do you send me on? Quite a detour to say the least ^^

One could very well consider that very welcome after such a long abstinence. I have to point out, it's easy to forget that this is indeed your first story, because your writing is just so captivating! Yeah, Mark warned Dave and Grey, and Chronos told them the truth then (his version, granted). Sure, maybe, the Constructs might be evil masterminds, but Chronos appeared a little defeated, but this might have been just show. Otherwise, Mark's reaction would be a little drastic. But he will have his reasons, won't he? Learning more about the Constructs, Edna being at the Lunar Haven, might make more sense in retrospect than our protagonists might like 🤔 Or she might become an unexpected ally by turning against the Constructs … Despite the assumption, there's a battle going on (acted out burning passion might be hardly distinguishable therefrom), Mark's return is actually somewhat anticlimactic after this long search for him ^^ I thought about some theories of how these different realities might look like in the comments of earlier chapters. Has he met other versions of Grey and Dave? Has he seen realities in which the Constructs outlived the Triad? Has he seen what comes after the Constructs? I have to admit, the story is at times confusing but to me more in a way that it is challenging—and I like challenging stories. drown said somewhere, the story will be around 70 chapters (correct me if I'm wrong), so it comes as no surprise that we don't see the grand scheme yet. However, as I said earlier, I do see a huge potential in drown's writing and therefore, I trust him to do the story justice. By the way, it feels like Clara has taken the back seat in the last chapters and I think, she's more of a front and center person really.

What an inspiring man! … What?

Well, "metallic ginger" could be an excellent stage name 🤔

"I mean, you can know the story, but then I have to make sure, you don't tell anyone else. And it can't just be making you say "fwuit". There is really no other way, you see?"

Sounds like Kelly, doing homeschooling, wasn't having this "holiday nonsense", let alone bank holidays, I assume. She probably already pictures herself running around supermarket after supermarket, trying to get every item from Manny's list. His reason being there, might not be his fault, but he's by no means an angel when it comes to causing trouble, especially verbally. There could be worse 🤷‍♂️ Bass will be like "no, no, no. Please touch me with your … sexy arm"

Yeah, if I was Manny and had just handed out punishment for Rocky, I wouldn't have let slid what Bass did that easily. And even if it was just to set a good example. Additionally, Rocky didn't partly act out of revenge. He might not have used his Karate skills this much to his advantage but this is still different from what Bass did, even though, it's kinda understandable why he did it. Yep, that was great! One development, I particularly like about this chapter, is that Rocky makes friends with gay people unknowingly and is now faced to deal with his prejudice. My thoughts exactly! I never entirely understood where that was coming from (aside from Kelly laying the groundwork for that), much less, why Rocky never challenged these beliefs.

Yet. You could have said "two new enemies", but that sounds more diplomatic^ ^

A terrible negligence that needs timely correcting.

Isn't that a speciality of the Tanners? 😜

Yeah, that really would have been embarrassing. That depends on the supermarket, I guess. In pretty rundown areas, this might not be a recommendation, but I assume, the family has standards. Bass, you might wanna check if these eggs were expired 😱 So unthoughtful of Linda … tze … Rocky beats some other boys up and gets friends for this … well, there could be better introductions than being the brutal one, but at least, he has established, he's not someone to underestimate.

Moving full-time to Gay Authors, is a big step 😜

You have an editor, you don't need glasses—oh, wait, might be helpful when reading Sandy's egg carton in real life

Can't say, this wasn't on purpose 😅 But yeah, I think, this is the answer that is more informative for me ^^

You already had me in tears when editing, so that doesn't count 😅 And I didn't cry because your writing was terrible, because it really wasn't. Quite the opposite 👍