CarlHoliday

Wow, I didn’t realize I haven’t done a blog entry since September, 2018. A lot of water has gone under the bridge since then, so I suppose it’s time for an update on what’s occurring here in Gold Bar, WA. First off, I’ve been doing quite a bit of writing, but other than the 2019 Fall Anthology and the 2020 Spring Anthology I haven’t posted any stories here since August 2018. In 2019, I wrote a YA Fantasy novel, The Birthday Present, about a young boy who runs away from home to go to Faerie to meet a dragon and submitted it to a story review site. An English university creative writing professor reviewed the novel and gave a very thorough critique. My writing was great, but there were two many characters and the protagonist got lost in the shuffle. Plus, my presentation of Faerie beings was a bit off from current interpretations. As it stands now, there are only dwarves, a brownie, and a dragon. The story is now in a total rewrite with over 11,000 words in 5 chapters. Then there is an apocalyptic virus novel, M. C. Escher Under Pale Turquoise, about a small group of survivors of a viral epidemic who are transported by aliens from LA to place far, far away. The protagonist is a late middle man who is the elected leader of the group. The antagonists are the aliens who turn out to be the aliens who visited Earth early in man’s development and made significant impacts on early religions. The story currently has over 36,000 words in 12 chapters. I’m also working on a YA/NA novel, Cary Grant and the Cougars, about a young man who sees and interacts with ghosts. When he was fifteen he went through a sweat lodge ceremony and while in a trance Cougar accepted him as his spirit animal. Plus, he has schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type. On top of everything else, he’s a mathematical genius who does differential equations to quiet his mind, he’s starting his first year of college, and he’s gay. The story currently has over 31,000 words. Then there is another schizoaffective novel, Arnold Snell (working title), about a long haul trucker nearing retirement. He is quite delusional and frequently has blackouts. It is currently at over 17,000 words in 5 chapters. Finally, there is another schizoaffective novel, When Eyes Cannot See the Truth (working title), about a young man growing up during the Vietnam war era. He is significantly impaired due to his mental illness. He tries very hard to exist in the real world all the while failing horribly at every attempt. It is currently at 5 chapters. My plan is to put it up on GA. So, you’re probably wondering where all this schizoaffective shit is coming from. Well, lo and behold, yours truly has been moved from good ol’ Bipolar Disorder I to Schizoaffective Disorder, Bipolar Type, due to my past and present delusions, hallucinations, and other issues. It doesn’t help that I may, though probably not, slightly be suffering from Asperger Syndrome. I spoke with my psychiatrist about that, but she says that while I am slightly symptomatic, I have to realize slightly is the key word. I was finally able to see a neurologist at the VA. I’m now taking a beta blocker to treat Essential Tremor, which affects my hands and fingers making it difficult to hold things, type, write, and sign my name. Also, though I am not diabetic I have Peripheral Neuropathy in my feet and hands (no wonder I drop things). Unfortunately, there isn’t any medicine I can take other than the 5% Lidocaine Ointment I was given for my arthritic knees, which didn’t work. When I go back to orthopedics in July for cortisone injections, I’ll be asking about at least one new knee. Also, I may be in the early stages of kidney disease, but due to the coronavirus situation at the VA I won’t be able to get another round of urine and blood tests until June. Well, that’s the current news from Gold Bar, WA. Hope everybody is hanging low and practicing physical distancing.

Thank you for your comment. I'm sorry you didn't enjoy the story; and, I will not apologize by explaining how and why this story came about. There was a reason behind it and, thankfully, that reason has removed itself from my vicinity and I'm back to writing stories not so extremely violent.

Thank you for your comment. Yes, I have to admit Charlie could have acted differently in all the times he left Bobby alone. Obviously, he had neighbors who could've come in, but he didn't do that.

Thank you for your interesting comment. Yes, Charlie is definitely in a can of worms and, unfortunately, the lid is on tight.

Thank you for your comment. Reading your comment makes me wish I wrote this as a happy story.

Thank you for your comment. I don't want to defend Charlie so early in the story. Nor, do I want to reveal what is to come. But, I have to think Charlie lives in an entirely different world where gifting 5K watches is done without a second thought. It was obvious that they were in a store that sold watches for much more, so Charlie simply assumed 5K was an appropriate amount. But, yes, Charlie has gotten himself into a snake pit that is going to test his resolve.

Thank you for your comment. I had a lot of difficulty with this chapter because due to Ben's mental state I felt a miraculous cure was inappropriate. Of course, I could've gone on and written more chapters until Ben gradually became more lucid, but when a story reaches a logical point there really isn't much you can do.

Thank you for your comment.

Thank you for your comment. I'm not sure how Geoff would've handled the Troy/Benny boy. Probably, he would've reached out to professional assistance, which would've meant Troy/Benny being put in a juvenile mental facility.

I have a feeling you really do want me to write a story about Gerald and his relationship with his family and his niece and nephews who come to him as a result of their parents' death. Of course, you have to relinquish assumed editorial control in that possibly the children won't be as bigoted as you seem to think they are.

Thank you for your comment. I don't feel sorry for Philippe because he made a choice in life to move away from the city to a rather isolated community that has the benefit of a great beach. Also, there is his on and off relationship with Gerald. They were an item and then it ended, probably as many relationships do. I've seen it many times where two gay men age together until they come to that certain age where one will go looking for a younger man and leave the other standing on the front porch wondering what went wrong. Gerald almost came back into Philippe's life, but couldn't because he wasn't out to his family and didn't want to jeopardize his relationship with them by reuniting with Philippe. Personally, I feel sorry for Gerald because closets can be quite suffocating. And, thank you for pointing out the metaphor of the squall line. Honestly, I didn't purposefully do that.

Thank you for your nice comment. Yes, Philippe is moving on. You might say his lifelong dream was to own a place down at the ocean. Where this story takes place there is a large dune structure the overlooks the beach. Philippe's house is up on that dune. Plus, there is a sizable community to become a part of and Philippe will have a happy end of life story there.

Thank you for your interesting comment. Unfortunately, this story really wasn't about Gerald and all of his failings. I've know single men who when asked why they've never married say, "I haven't met a woman I'd like to marry." And, that is usually sufficient for most people. I was in the closet to a lot of people as I aged and when I came out a lot of those friends no longer cared about me. It was as if I no longer existed. We can assume Gerald was not out to his family and when his sister's will stipulated him as guardian of her children, well, what can I say. He says he hasn't been to a gay bar in a long time, so he wasn't out to the kids either. Only when Kyle overheard the conversation between Gerald and Philippe did the secret get out. As far as Gerald trying to take his niece and nephews away from their church and either allow them from attending a "more" liberal one or not attending church at all is rather extreme. I can almost see one or another of the older children either talking to their pastor or possibly even calling CPS to escape living Gerald. You might say that's fodder for another story.

Thank you for your nice comment. I found this story quite easy to write. I'm not exactly in the same situation as Philippe, but close enough to build a core that permitted the correct additions to make a story. And, yes, there is a Gerald, too, but like me he has been modified enough that any recognition on his part is negligible.

The alarm startled Philíppe out of a familiar traveling dream with Andrew, Gerald, and Franco. He was never certain where they were going, but Andrew kept assuring everyone in his Mercedes S 560 that he knew the way. As usual, Gerald and Franco were sitting in the backseat talking (or, rather, whispering) about something that only concerned them, though their intermittent soft chuckles were disconcerting. They were always like that, keeping trivial secrets from Andrew and Philíppe. The only trou

Philíppe, who is in his late fifties, wakes from a frequent dream one rainy Saturday morning. As he moves from bed to breakfast memories from his past flood his consciousness. Unexpectedly, he receives a phone call from a nearly forgotten voice. There is an invitation to the upcoming football game followed by a discussion of where to do planning for the weekend. All the while a squall line is coming in from out in the ocean.

An interesting article about a gay man in Cairo and all that he goes thru to get out alive. https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2019/04/01/egyptian-refugee

Thank you for your brief comment. Sometimes only a few words are sufficient.

I don't know, sometimes it just comes out that way.

I suppose it matters whether you've been propositioned by a sixteen year old. You want to say yes, but you know you have to say no.

Yes, you can never tell whether someone is nice or not.

Will, thank you for your comment. Can't give out secrets, but this could have a happy ending.

Will, thank you for your comment. Yes, I tend to seek the dark side. When I was reading Boy Erased today, I came across the part where Garrard Conley was orally raped by a fellow student who in turn called Garrard's mother and said her son was gay. Frankly, I couldn't believe that occurred, but it was true. And, then, Garrard's father told him if he was going to be openly gay, he could not live in the family home. He had shit happen to him, but he had the courage to tell his tale. Thankfully, he didn't pull any punches.

In this week’s New Yorker there is an incredible short story by upcoming gay writer Bryan Washington. It is titled “Waugh” and mostly takes place mostly in the Montrose neighborhood of Houston, Texas, through which Waugh Drive makes its way. The gritty and graphic story is about the hard life of hustlers on the streets of a big city and what they have to do to not only get something to eat, but also to keep clean. If you can’t get a copy of the zine, go to newyorker.com and click on Podcasts to hear Bryan read his story. As a sidelight, Bryan has two novels out and a collection of short stories is set to hit the shelves in March ’09.

Thank you for your comment. Okay, I'll give you this synonym.