methodwriter85

Isn't Canada generally ahead when it comes to gay rights? They had universal gay marriage in 2003. The U.S got it ONE state in 2004, and Massachusetts wasn't joined by other states until 2008-2009. We're in 2002, and the public image of gay life still resembles the go-go dancers and bed-hopping of Queer As Folk. (Which was ironically filmed in Canada but still set in the United States.) It wasn't until gay marriage and gay adoptions/surrogate pregnancies started happening in the U.S. with more frequency that I started hearing more about gay guys settling down in monogamous relationships and setting up family units. Before that, the only gay guys I knew who were settled tended to be the 40-something/50-something types who had adopted kids and were aged out of the club scene. 25-year old American gay guys announcing they were settling down for life with a partner was still pretty damn rare during this time period. I mean, in 2010, I had a straight friend joke to me that I might find a husband in grad school. I didn't, of course, but it really made me think about the fact that when I came out circa 2001, having a "husband" would've been a foreign concept to me. I could've had a "partner" that I had a Vermont civil union with, but it's still kinda different. A 15-year old gay boy growing up in 2014 America would have the concept that he could get married and could have a husband pretty much in his consciousness, especially if he's growing up in one of the 19 states that allow gay marriage now. Adam Phillip's wrote this autobiographical novel called Cross-Currents, and he had this scene with a bisexual narrator who talks to a gay person about what it means to be a gay guy who wants a committed relationship. I thought it was very true to the time period of the late 1990's/the very early 2000's- I thought it just kind of nailed that "circuit boi" era mindset of the Y2K years, when gay guys stopped being scared of AIDS but didn't really have a lot of examples showing off that settling down into a family as a monogamous gay couple was possible. Wade and Matt do have the example of settling down into family units, but neither Brad/Robbie nor Stefan/JP are examples of perfect monogamy. I missed that, but I have to really disagree with this. There's nothing similar in their dynamic- Robbie was the nouveau rich raised in the house of a man who had crawled his way to respectable middle class from serious white trash roots and Brad was the Golden Boy of an incredibly rich, old-money family. There was always this imbalance with them- Robbie was always this impulsive, insecure guy who needed to buy friends and show off his incredibly shaky wealth, and Brad could, in a sense, hold the card that he could've destroyed Robbie financially if he wanted to. Brad had all the control in the relationship and they were never really on equal footing. Matt, meanwhile, grew up in an affluent, well-respected family and has the confidence that went along with that. While the Carrswolds are nowhere near the wealth of the Danfields, Matt's never had "trying to prove himself" syndrome that nouveau-riche people like Robbie seem to get. I've never gotten the feeling that Wade and Matt weren't equals with each other. It's a very Southern thing, I think, of knowing "who your people are." Which is probably why Wade relates so much to Alex because Southern culture resembles English culture in that regard- the whole "cavalier gentry" thing. I think it's just a function of the whole affluent class that Matt comes from. I mean, you probably saw this with your son's friends because I figure you're somewhere close to Matt's socioeconomic class- parents expect very high achiever trophy kids, which is why they're under so much immense pressure. Which was an interesting contrast to someone like Will, who does well in school but isn't pressured to be a National Honor Society, varsity-sport letterman, valedictorian candidate like some of the kids I grew up with. He's not under expectations by his family to get a job that will help him move up a social class or at least maintain the one he's in, because Will's already at the top, and his family wealth pretty much guarantees that he doesn't have to worry about any real financial setbacks.

If anything, Matt would probably try and become the over-eager Little League dad-coach. I can tooootttalllllyyyy see Matt becoming the guy who becomes over-involved in their kid's sport lives, although not to unhealthy Jeanine or Wally levels. Although what about Maddy and her soccer games? Wouldn't Matt and Wade want to be involved with that as well? Girls play sports, too. Come on, don't be a sexist. In all seriousness though, Wade doesn't seem to relate to Maddy as a father figure. I think he consciously or sub-conciously avoids that in deference to Cody, although if Cody stays the long-distance dad through Maddy's childhood I think he'd eventually feel obligated to provide a father figure to Maddy.

To be fair with Wade on the Riley stuff...it's a soap. Little kids are pretty much seen but not heard, and if Mark put in parental moment after parental moment in the story, it'd get boring. And we've only followed Wade's POV for one chapter in this story- we can't even really judge what kind of parent Wade is. It's like what Sharon said to me one time where I said that I didn't think JP and JJ had a close relationship- she said something to the effect of, "How do you know that? For all we know, JP and JJ have weekly lunches where they discuss everything under the sun. We're not privy to every moment in these character's lives." Mark did say that he doesn't see Wade becoming the "at home at 5 p.m. and playing with the kids on their lawn" type because Wade's a bit too ambitious for that. I can clearly see that with Will, but Mark's got a point about it probably not being the type of parent that Wade will turn into.

Still, I'd be way more willing to ride a light rail than I would a subway in a very seismically active area. Portland seems like its benefitted a lot from its light rail system. Have you ever ridden the subway and felt it was okay, or does it kind of freak you out?

Hey, Blue, as a railroad guy, this should be fun for you: It's Now Legal to Build Light Rail in the San Fernando Valley It's off into the future probably, but it's nice to see that more and more suburban sprawl areas are embracing alternative transit methods. I mean really, what are they going to do? Create 20-lane highways? Not feasible. I wish I could've experienced 1980's Sherman Oaks Galleria. Just looks like a lot of fun. And the Valley Accent is such a hoot...do people still speak like that, or no?

Good points. I've been hoping that you'd have JJ in some Burberry now that he's going to live in a colder environment and will need a lot more jackets and the life. So far you've only really mentioned Dior with him, and he doesn't really strike me as a "one label" guy. Burberry seems like something JJ would rock the hell out of, and it was at its most popular during this time period.

Matt's never been that much of a clotheshorse. He knows when to dress up, but it's not really a focus with him. And with Will, Mark's been consistent with the fact that Will doesn't really give a damn about clothing. Wade and JJ are the clotheshorses for this generation.

I've been working as an intern in a museum with my supervisor, Katie, for the past couple of weeks. Today, we had a discussion that turned into the paranormal, and she told me about something that happened when she was a teenager. She tries to debunk crazy things that have happened, but this is one she hasn't been able to do. It was the summer after she graduated from high school, sometime in the second half of the 1990's. She was 18 at the time. Her friend Billy was a few years older, but still lived with his mother in their house. This was in a small town some distance away from Baltimore, and Billy's house had just enough land that he could throw raging, day-to-night summer parties complete with bonfires. At the same time, they weren't totally isolated, and random people from the surrounding neighborhoods would show up to his parties all the time. This kid named Nick started showing up every day at Billy's house, knocking on the door at 7 a.m. and engaging him in the morning-til-night drinking. He was about 16, seemed fairly normal and everything except for a couple of things. The first was that he always wore the same thing- for two weeks, he never changed clothes, and his clothes still looked clean. The second is that he was never seen eating or going to the bathroom, despite the fact that Nick was drinking heavily with Billy. Finally, oddly enough, no one remembers actually feeling Nick's skin- even my supervisor, who had sat next to him in a car. She hung out with Billy and Nick at Billy's house two times, and each time she and her friend felt like something was very "off" with Nick, especially when he would give off this laugh that just sounded very evil and maniacal. Finally, Billy's hospitality reached its limits- after two weeks of waking Billy up at 7 a.m. to go party, Billy snapped at Nick. He told Nick that he was waking up his mother trying to sleep, and that he's been hanging out at his house all day and night for two weeks straight and that he really just needs to come back later. Nick never showed up again. Billy came to Katie, a little bit later, with a newspaper article. It was about Nick, who had apparently killed himself. Billy was originally upset because he felt like he must've put Nick over-the-edge when he kicked him out, until he checked the dates. Nick had killed himself with his father's shotgun over two weeks ago. Katie has tried to come up with logical reasons for why this happened. The most logical one was that they screwed up the dates in the newspaper and Nick had indeed killed himself right after his talk with Billy, but two weeks? That's a huge discrepancy. What gets me about this is that I've never heard of a smart haunting that was apparently so strong that it could manifest itself as a solid human form, enough that it could fool people into thinking he was a person, for that long. I mean, I've hard of ghosts "saying goodbye" right after their death, but nothing that sounds like that. And there's the fact that he interacted with a a lot of people, not just my supervisor and her friend. He was acknowledged by other people who came into Billy's house, not just Billy and Katie. Have any of you, or people you know, had a long, sustained smart haunting like that? I'd love to hear any.

Flat-fronts are this: They're all the rage right now with the young people. The shorts create a flat front, and kinda taper in at the knees or go above the knees.

Seriously though. Who hasn't had a crush? Who hasn't felt all logic and reasoning leave you in regards to that person when that crush was in full-bloom? There's a rush, and it's only afterwards when you really get to know the person that you start to think rationally and logically again.

I learned this lesson today when I tried to buy flat-front khaki shorts, which is all the rage with the kids these days. It just doesn't look good on a guy with short stumpy legs with massive thighs and calves- it's a look clearly made for guys with long and slender legs. So instead I went with hiking shorts, which are basically cargo shorts that go above the knee. It's funny though- I went to Aeropostale, and they were advertising long-length flat-fronts with 11.5 inch inseams, which...doesn't that kind of defeat the purpose of flat-fronts? I thought the point as that they tapered in and ended at about the knee. You might as well just go ahead and wear cargo shorts or skateboard shorts at that point. I came thisclose to buying a neon-green tank top, as neon tank tops also seem to be the rage with the kids these days, but I kind of resisted. Weirdly enough, I like NOTICING trends, but I generally don't engage in them myself because I like being able to wear clothes over multiple years. Though I think I actually could pull off neon very well with my dark Pacific Islander tan. I don't know, though. I feel like if I wore stuff like that, I'd be like the 35-year olds wearing Abercrombie that I used to make fun of when I was 19. Do you wear flat-fronts, Blue? I think you'd rock the hell out of that look with those skinny legs of yours. I'm not sure I can see you in those funky neon tank tops, though.

Wade's usually calm and collected, but right now he's a giddy guy in the middle of a new massive crush. The only other time we saw Wade in that status was when he was falling in love with Matt, but we didn't really know Wade all that well then. Wade was more of an enigma until Matt saw Wade with his family during the Holidays. It's been a long and enduring theme in CAP that love (either falling in or falling out) causes our characters to act in ways that kinda baffle and confound us readers.

My sister used to promote raves, and I remember Shampoo was the big gay party club in Philly at the time. There's no real gay life in northern Delaware...you have to go to Rehomo Beach, and there it tends to be more focused on middle-aged gay men and lesbians who have families.

I'd say it was the bridge- somewhere around the mid-2000's. I definitely noticed them and the tribal tats on the guys I was checking out in college in 2005-2007, but I feel like the tribal tats came in earlier(with my sister's friends who are about Matt and Wade's age) and just stayed around for a while. I think they're pretty dated, like how a barbed wire tattoo just SCREAMS 90's. If I see a guy with a tribal tat I'll assume he has to be at least in his late 20's but is probably in his early/mid-30's, while those chest and rib "deep poignant message" tats seem more the domain of guys in their early 20's. If I see a guy with a barbed wire tattoo, I'd probably peg him as being about Private Tim's age, born somewhere in the mid/late 1970's and getting his tat somewhere in the mid/late 90's. I really think Tony SCREAMS a Celtic Cross tat, but I don't think those are quite as dated.

Every time I see a guy with a tribal tattoo around his arm, I just think, "Yup, you were college-aged circa 1998 to 2005 and got this tat." It was either the tribal tattoo, or the Celtic cross. Then somewhere in the late '00s to early '10's, it switched over to letter-writing tattoos either on the chest or around a rib, or just the general Ed Hardy sleeve.

Happy birthday!

Yeah, Blue, that was really good analysis of the characters. I'm impressed. It shows why, even with the similarities to Brad, Will is still pretty different from him.

Well, now we now who we can turn to if we have any computer tech questions. Computers do go into light year leaps during this decade.

I don't think the concept of "trade-offs" and "opportunity costs" and "personal sacrifice" really come through with a guy who grew up in a billionaire family. He, for the most part, does what he wants to do when he wants to do it, because barring emotional stuff, there's not a lot of consequences for him because of his money. It's not like Will had to get a job when he got emancipated like most emancipated minors. As for sports, Will had the talent, but not the drive to really push himself in it. Could you honestly see Will doing the kind of work that pro surfers probably do to get themselves there?

This weekend at Firefly, I saw several guys wearing Native American headdresses. So apparently it's not just a Coachella thing. Ugh.

Yes. It's something that I came to accept right around Paternity, and I realized I couldn't push my version of morality, as a kid from the working class, on these people. (Although to be honest, the values I was taught was more on the "survivor side" of using people when you need them and ditching them when you don't than the middle class kind of value side. I just learned those by watching episodes of Full House and Growing Pains.) These are not normal kids, and we can't really apply the same rules here. A really good illustration of this I saw...there was a mild uproar of pic of a 13-year old Willow Smith hanging out with her 20-year old friend on a bed, with him being shirtless. There were pearls clutched, but Will and Jada really had no problem with it. Because again, the rich are different, and they have completely different mindsets. (Though to be honest, I didn't really see a problem with it. It's not like she was naked in bed with him.) He's rich. He'd get off with a slap on the wrist. Even most middle-class white kids do. The only way someone would do serious time for it would be if they had a distribution network going, and even though, if you're rich and powerful enough, you can still get away with a slap on the wrist. See: Thomas Ravenel, the former South Carolina state treasurer who embezzled money to involve himself in cocaine ring and served maybe 8 months in a low-security prison where he, in his own words, picked up playing bocce ball. University of Delaware kids were big on smoking pot so I knew a good amount of kids who got busted. As long as you had the money for a decent lawyer, you were fine.

Well, the thing about being a twink is that it relies on you having this youthful, feminine/andro beauty- skinny, perfect skin, etc etc.That doesn't really age well. You can't maintain it. For me, I LOVE it when a twink goes from this: To THIS: I still cannot get over how much hotter I find James Maslow now than I did when he was 18/19 at the start of Big Time Rush and the typical pretty boy twink. He was adorable as a twink, but these days? Damn. Milk sure did that body good. He's a good illustration of that "filling out" stage that often happens with guys in their late teens/early 20's, albeit aided with an obvious fanatic lifting routine. Most guys will find their shoulders broaden and such when they're in their early 20's. When I was 22, I got fitted for a suit, and I told the guy, "I should be a 40 chest", based on my prom tux three years ago. He said, "No, you're at least a 44" and he was right. BTW, has anyone else noticed that guys seem to be cutting off that long, mid/late 2000's Zach Efron Circa High School Musical kind of hair these days? Shorter hair is coming back, or you're seeing the undercut look with really short sides and long on the top.

In honor of Blue's L.A. River picture posting, I thought I'd post this: New Riverwalk Opening From Studio City to Sherman Oaks I think murals are pretty great ways of brightening up a space and avoid graffiti (which can be art but can be just total crap), so I really think putting a mosaic is a great idea.

BTW, seriously...shop at H&M. They're cheap, and the bulk of what they make are styles that would look good on skinny people. I'm pretty sure Los Angeles has to have an H&M. I googled it, and here's what Askmen had to say about dressing your body type: Pros And Cons Of Dressing A Skinny Body A slim frame is significantly easier to dress than a large one simply because clothes hang better on thinner bodies. Another benefit of having a slender physique is that it’s easy for you to be in style because trendy clothing not only looks good on you, it’s made readily available to you by the fashion industry. And, if you’re into high-end apparel, your size is more frequently available in stores because your body shape is what designers prefer to dress (for both aesthetic and sample/pattern size reasons). While there are obvious benefits to dressing a skinny body type, there remain, however, a few challenges. Notably, wearing ill-fitting clothes will result in coming off as a boy playing grown-up. A further and rather vexing problem this body type faces is finding clothes that fit at budget-friendly mass retailers, which — in America — frequently size up (offering sizes up to 3XL). To solve this problem, become a fan of European imports like Zara, H&M, and Topman, which are skinny-body type- and budget- friendly. Dress Your Body Type: The Guide Fit No matter what your body type, proper-fitting clothes are vital to being a well-dressed man. Though a frequent mistake made by men with skinny body types is wearing oversize clothing in an effort to bulk up visually, skinny men actually benefit from having their clothes tailored more than any other body type. Hunting down a reputable tailor and taking all recent purchases to him will ensure you're showing off your frame to its best advantage. When deciding what to buy in the first place, favor body-skimming dress shirts and tees that permit some movement in the fabric (look for “Slim Fit” models at your mass retailer). Check the label on your tops too, avoiding anything that contains elastic as these garments tend to stick too closely to your body rather than gliding over it. For a similar reason, skinny jeans should also be banished from your closet as they will either make you look malnourished or like you're wearing leggings — neither of which is attractive in the least. When it comes to denim, stick with straight-leg or slim-fit boot cut jeans instead. Colors And Patterns If you're on the slim side, there are a few tricks you can use to play up your assets and minimize the things you don’t like about your body. First off, you should know that recent research has revealed that vertical stripes actually make people look larger, which flies in the face of conventional fashion wisdom. Opt, therefore, for dress shirts, T-shirts, blazers, and suit pants with a vertically striped pattern. For suits and dress pants, pinstripes are a classic, flattering choice. For patterned tops, such as plaid or windowpane, midsize patterns are much more flattering than smaller ones. Where color coordination is concerned, wearing all of one or, more specifically, dark colors like black from head to toe will emphasize your skinny body frame, so take advantage of breaking up your outfit when you can with lighter hues here and there such as white, light-gray and pale-blue. Hair In addition to the fit, color and pattern of the garments in your wardrobe, there are additional points to consider when dressing a skinny body type. To begin with, impeccable grooming is a surefire way to enhance any man's appearance, be he thin or not. As skinny men tend to have slimmer, angular faces, use this fact to your advantage by asking your barber to give you a great haircut that will show off your prominent cheekbones and jawline. Fashion Trends Additionally, much like with their hairstyles, men with slender physiques can pull off an impressive array of fashion trends. Because designers prefer to dress this body type, many clothing lines are designed with your body type in mind, and you can use this knowledge to your advantage by regularly incorporating one or two trendy pieces into your wardrobe each season. If you're not into following fashion, at least consider slipping into some trendy footwear. Building Your Wardrobe With regards to the particular pieces slim men should have hanging in their closets, single-button and two-button jackets are a good choice for smart-casual occasions, while double-breasted blazers is this body type's best friend for dressier events. In terms of outerwear, toppers that cover your rear should feature more heavily in your wardrobe than cropped jackets. Crew necks are a better choice than V-necks, and in cold weather, feel free to add turtlenecks into your winter wardrobe as they're warm — and your body type is one of the few (if only) that can get away with wearing them and still look good. Thin men can also enjoy the benefits of layering — namely, that you stay warmer but look cooler. Lastly, skinny men can have lots of fun experimenting with fabrics as they can get away with wearing a wider variety compared to other body types — heavy tweeds, corduroys and anything with a chunky-knit texture are good examples that look fantastic on a slender frame, but would overpower other body types. Checklist: Your Wardrobe Staples Double-breasted blazers Heavy-knit sweaters Pinstripe suits Trendy footwear (say, a pair of combat boots) Crew-neck tees Straight-leg or slim boot cut jeans Flat-front trousers A pair of corduroy pants Single or double-button blazers Vertically striped dress shirts Military-style jackets A tailor **** Now that it's summer, you could just go classic summer prep and rock a pair of flat-front pastel shorts, an oxford shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and a pair of boat shoes. That seems to be a flattering look on any guy. I'm not sure I'd recommend those funky pattern/colored ringer tank tops that all the guys seem to be wearing, though.

Happy birthday, JP. It's funny to think that we've seen the guy go from 26 in Chronicles of an Academic Predator, to 66 in Flux.