Admire Me - 11. Chapter 11 The Affect

Korbyn’s plan ‘Swarm and Spread’ was fantastic. It was a simple but yet effective plan which I don’t think Keylan could recover from. It was funny watching Korbyn go all over the school putting printed out copies of papers about Keylan in every locker he came in contact with.

The paper said: If you have had any type of sexual intercourse, with Keylan Sanchez, you should be tested. Please get tested at the nearest clinic. Especially if you are experiencing any unnatural signs of dizziness, nausea, or anything that isn’t regular.

Korbyn had the whole school thinking that the strong irresistible football star had some form of an STD. Keylan couldn’t hold his head up. Even when he was around his new clique. Probably because as soon as the copies went all over the school, the coaches kicked Keylan out of football.

Football season was over already, but the STD, ruined his chance of getting a scholarship. It was late in the week of December, and after the Christmas break Keylan would have to go to P.E. with his head down.

His dad was so upset, because Keylan fell short of his expectations. His dad depended heavily on that football scholarship. He thought Keylan’s mistake of having unprotected sex costed him his future. It really wasn’t unprotected sex that cost him his future, it was removing his protection I granted him by being in my clique.

Now that he has no protection from me. His future was infected. He should have made better decision about who his friends were. He should have stayed one of the most popular good looking guys, but he chose a different path and Korbyn made his bad reputation consume him.

Korbyn was so gleeful at his plan working. When he was happy about getting Keylan back, so was I. Korbyn was a part of the team. Whenever he won, I won.

Every day was harder than the last for Keylan.

Jade’s ‘Blitzkrieg’ or ‘Blitz’ was potent, and effective. I believe it worked better than Jade ever planned. Ryan was hit from all sides at once. I didn’t think Jade could come up with plans that could do so much damage. I took time out to thank God, we were best friends.

Jade went online and found pictures of a guy with an extra small package. When I say small, I mean small. Then he forwarded the picture to everybody’s phone claiming it was Ryan. People who didn’t even know Ryan were laughing at him when they saw him.

Ryan’s adopted parents heard the news, they couldn’t bear the embarrassment that came with Ryan’s name. His adopted parents disowned him, and he was transferred to another school.

I think Jade knew what it would take to get Ryan disowned by his rich foster parents. Now he lives somewhere else, and he probably has way less money than he did before.

Jade got multiple praises from Korbyn and I, for actually keeping his word. He literally made Ryan ‘history’.

It was my turn, and David didn’t stand a chance. He was baffled by ‘Code Black’. It smacked him so hard his brother had to council him. It only took a credit card, that Korbyn let me borrow.

I didn’t over spend. The price was only $29.99 for a special packaged deal. I went online to purchase a gay porn magazine. And I shipped it to David’s address. His identity was ruined at school, just as well as it was with his parents.

Everybody thought he was gay, but they were only believing the deception I threw in with the magazines. His mom and dad were deeply disappointed. They had to have David’s older gay brother to sit down and council him about being in denial of his sexuality.

It was funny to see him tell everyone he wasn’t gay, and yet they just thought he was in denial. It was a trap, whether he said ‘yes’ or ‘no’, I had the public believing what I wanted them to believe.

Code black was a major success. All of our plans were a definite success. We left David’s clique with nothing else to retaliate with. We were so awesome, that the three man marching band David once had, was only two man. Thanks to Jade getting Ryan transferred.

All of this happen in less than two weeks. We were still hanging on to December’s cold weather, still waiting for Christmas break to approach.

We had all the right reasons to do what we did. I’ve been called: evil, devilish, crazy, maniac, disturbed, and sneaky. That’s not half of what I’ve been called, but I will be all of those if it means I won’t allow someone to cross me. There is only one way to sum up what I am…. I am an Alpha! People need to live with that.

My new clique cackled victoriously whenever we passed one another in the halls. It was good to see us all happy.

Jade met with me in the bathroom. Before we locked ourselves in the stall we made sure the restroom was empty of all boys. Jades eyes looked at me knowingly, he saw something in me and he was making it obvious by staring at my lips.

When his eyes moved up to my nose he finally was able to exhale, Before staring me head-on in the eyes. There was nothing that could come between our Alpha and Beta connection. I could feel us all over the bathroom.

Jade’s lips came closer. He knew he wanted me, and I was standing before him, Letting him know: if he wants me, he can take me.

Not sure if he was making the right move. He timidly tilted his head, slowly closing his eyes as if he was lost in his own imagination of something…of someone.

He kept locking up, as if he was scared to touch his Alpha, as if he wanted to give me the touch and kiss I’ve long for, but he was afraid of ruining something. That is how deep his care ran for me.

As adorable and suave as Jade was, I had to take charge. Suddenly pulling his beautiful face in my delicate hands, our lips met.

The old familiar tingle came back, reminding me of the night we first kissed, the night he had a nightmare, and I was there for him. Everything felt so right.

Then out of surprise, Jade broke the steamy kiss. I wanted it to go on longer. Wiping his mouth I asked him ‘what was wrong?’ I thought I was who he wanted.

Jade held his head down, looking at the bathroom tile floor. For some reason he couldn’t look at me. Which was not like him. It was so weird. Then he told me what made him react the way he did.

Jade told me he was in a relationship with someone already. I had to catch my breath before asking “Who?” it came out limp. I sucked it all up. He couldn’t see me weak.

He told me ‘tonight when we go to his house, at the celebration between our clique, he will invite the guy over.’ I couldn’t wait. The suspense was rattling my nerves.

*Later*

“Let’s go see how their lives are holding up.” Korbyn said offering us. Taking Korbyn’s offer, I didn’t see anything wrong with picking at David and Keylan. I don’t have a problem with that. It’s not like we have anything else important to do.

Rising from our lunch table, we strided pridefully to their lonely ,cold, lifeless table. It sure looked depressing not seeing Ryan there, but that was a consequence that had to be accepted.

“How are your lives holding up?” I nastily teased,

David immediately sprang up to his feet, at my comment, stepping to my face. “You already know that answer!” he looked like rage was flowing all over him, he didn’t waste any time.

Before, I could make another smart remark. His hands turned into fist and he pulled it back swiftly aiming it at my face…

I was stuck. I was stuck in place. Of all the things I could come up with. I didn’t know what to do if it came down to physical action. I didn’t think it would happen this way.

Time had stopped. I was about to get knocked out! I should have left this situation alone. I should have let code black handle him and let him suffer from that alone. David had had enough of my games. I could only stand there and think: ‘I’m a goner!’

The colors of the world went back into place, and I could hear time ticking down. David was in motion of swinging his fist, it was close. I knew this would be a harsh lick, and would leave me with a black eye-

Air blew past me, in a gust. I closed my eyes and flinched-

SMACK!

After the fist connected I opened my eyes to see how bad everything was. Suddenly I saw the whole scenery changed. It was exactly a different way than I had pictured. I thought I was a goner. My face had no pain, I had no marks, or swelling. It was almost amazing!

Mitch gave David a strong hard hook, to the face. Knocking David on the floor. When I looked at Mitch I wanted to say thank you. He got out of his seat to save me from being on the floor. Mitch possessed so much anger in his indigo eyes I was almost too scared to look him head on. I glanced down at his saggy pants, checking out his underwear. It was the only place I could look without feeling his anger.

David was on the cafeteria floor, holding a red blotch on his face. He rolled on the floor kicking in pain. C.J. came and stood beside Mitch. They both were looking at David on the ground.

“Stay on the ground.” C.J. said when he saw him trying to crawl to his knees. Then he kicked him in the ribs, back to a laying position.

A teacher came walking over. She saw Mitch and C.J. standing over David. Putting the pieces together she thought she knew who started the whole commotion. “C.J. and Mitch, get in the office!” she yapped, they both pulled up their pants slightly heading out the cafeteria. “You two can’t stay out of trouble for nothing.”

My clique was fleeing the scene. ”That was close.” I said to them on our way to the table.

As I sat down, Mitch crossed my mind. It was a quick second, almost as quick as the second he jumped up from his seat to save me.

Jade’s House

We didn’t have a bash or a party. It was just us three. We called it our celebration. It wasn’t many people but it was fun. It seemed like the pieces of my life were coming together, and the pieces were fitting perfectly. After filtering my life from the pretenders, losers, want-to-be’s, and haters. I only allowed the good in. I learned the only thing that comes from good, is good.

We were on the living room floor bunched together watching movie after movie. Laughing and eating bags of popcorn. I had to get use to Korbyn being around. I still hadn’t taken him out of the frienemy category. At the same time, he was almost becoming one of us. An actual member.

Sometimes I would stop watching the movie to see what he was doing, or to be sure he wouldn’t fade and turn into someone else. I couldn’t believe he was still with us. I guess he is with us, although we have our side debates.

A knocking on Jade’s door made us all scramble on the floor. Jade ran to the door, as Korbyn and I stood up. “He is here.” Jade whispered from the door. Korbyn looked half lost because he didn’t know what Jade had told me earlier in the boys restroom. I know we were a clique but there were some things Korbyn shouldn’t know.

As Jade’s hand twisted the door knob. My mind was racing. I couldn’t wait to see who this guy was, the mystery I couldn’t solve. The guy who was having a relationship with Jade. The door opened completely, and in walked…

Mitch!

He walked in holding a baby. I knew it had to be his daughter, wrapped in pink bundles of blankets.

That wasn’t the main concern of mine. I couldn’t believe Jade was talking to Mitch behind my back. I thought I made it clear to him that Mitch and I use to talk. I think Jade will have to be punished for crossing-

I suddenly stopped my madness from uprising, when C.J. walked through the door behind Mitch. He whispered something in Jade’s ear while the door was being closed. The way C.J. eyes met Jade’s I knew Mitch came for other reasons…not because Jade was talking to him behind my back.

Korbyn must have known he was the odd man out. He wore a bored look, yawning “Jade, can I crash on your couch?” he asked.

“Yeah.” Jade replied taking mini steps to his room, trying to get C.J. to sneak back there with him without Korbyn noticing any signs of weirdness. I watched the two of them walking out, and all I could say was: ‘They made a cute couple.’

When they finally made it to Jade’s room, I was sitting on the opposite couch across from a snoozing Korbyn. In my head I could probably guess what C.J. and Jade were doing in there.

When Korbyn slipped away from the room into sleep. There was only Mitch and myself in the living room. Sitting beside each other. He thought it would be nice to sit by me on the love seat, holding his daughter.

He played with her by bouncing her on his thighs. “Go to daddy.” He told his daughter. It never registered to me what he meant, until the babies eyes landed on me.

Unless I’m assuming things. Yeah that could be just assumptions.

“Go to your second dad.” He told her again. He should stop that, because I can’t be the other dad. My feelings for him were done. Those feelings had evaporated. We can hug, but that is as far as I will go with him. After knowing about Shunda I couldn’t see myself going any further with him. It was too disgusting to think, he once laid with Shunda.

Mitch handed the baby over to me, and I took her bundled pink blankets in my arms. I cared for his child, but I didn’t want him to think my inner feelings toward him would change. I let him know I would prefer to be the baby’s uncle instead of a second Dad.

Besides that, we had a warm touching conversation as friends. It was a long nice talk that almost made my heart melt. He was so sweet. It was like his feelings for me never left. He let me know he wasn’t confused about his sexuality. He only goes one way. Shunda was a mistake. Then in-between words he would try to kiss me, but I wouldn’t let him. He tried to say: Him and I, would make the perfect family. I kept resisting his attempts.

I distracted myself by trying to mentally count up the months Shunda was pregnant. Something wasn’t adding up right. If this really was his child. I didn’t want to make him mad by asking him questions, or telling him what I thought about him being a dad.

This went on for two hours. It was like he was trying to convince me to be with him. I wish Jade would come out of his room already, so I can have an excuse not to continue this. I had a clear idea what Jade did in his room. I wanted to tell him bye but I didn’t want to disturb his romance.

“Can you take me home?” I asked, looking at Mitch. I didn’t want to put up with this anymore, I couldn’t stay here. Everybody was having a good time except me. I didn’t have romance after all this mess. I would hate to violate Jade, so I gave him his space. I gathered myself and walked out to Mitch’s Jaguar. It was a cold night in December, and I still had no one.

Mitch drove me home. For some reason he wanted a kiss out of me. I told him ‘no.’ what did he think this was? We aren’t together. Plus I didn’t want to lead him on.

When I got inside my house I prepared for bed. I showered, and changed into something comfortable. As I prepared for bed, I remembered I never found the guy I wanted. The lonely feelings started to come back just like they did before. I tortured myself thinking of how Jade had a boyfriend and I didn’t. Then another thought came, saying; maybe I should have stayed with Mitch.

Maybe I should have….yeah I should have.

Wait what am I saying? I really should have got with my Beta before he got with C.J. I started to get mad. I began to see all the chances I had to be with someone and I turned them all down. I still don’t know why things waited so late to become so clear.

Braylon calm down… in due time someone might care for you. Maybe he didn’t come as soon as you wanted, but he will be around. I kept having to coach myself through the loneliness. Hold on Braylon, everything has a time.

***** 3 Hours Later

Knock, Knock, knock, Knock! I jumped out of my sleep to the glass of my room window rattling. A shadowy figure was knocking repeatedly on the window. My mind started racing at the scary possibility of things it could be.

I rolled out the side of my bed, sticking close to the floor. The way the knocking hit the glass. I knew it wouldn’t be long before the glass was broken. When the knocking kept coming, I thought it could be David for revenge. He had a good enough reason. Especially what happened to him in the cafeteria. Then I thought he wasn’t the only person who hated me. He wasn’t the only person who probably wanted me dead. I have ruined tons of people in the school, and out of all those people how could I leave out Keylan…most of all Ryan?!

It may be Ryan! Since, he transferred to a new school. Who would think he broke into my room and murdered me? He was supposed to be out of town. So they would never guess him. Maybe David still had plans for my life after all. Who knows, the knocker could be some random stranger/serial killer picking out his prey.

My heart pounded. I became disorientated at who it could be. Too many possibilities.

Knock, knock, knock…

I crawled on my room floor, keeping low to the ground. I kept moving my knees until I got to the window sill. I lifted a single blind to peek at who the knocker was. I should have crawled out of here, but I think I wanted to know who was up to this. That way, I will know who to get back… If I lived.

I recognized a hoodie draped over the head of the killer, and I knew who the knocker was. It was Mitch!

One thing I knew about him was his obsession for hoodies. I was glad he came. I was thinking about him hours ago before falling to sleep. I can fully apologize for not taking his offer to be with me. He wasn’t a bad guy, and him coming to my window was so amazing. I wonder if-

My knees wobbled and my arms wouldn’t move. Lifting the window had all of a sudden became one of the worst things I’ve ever did in my life. The instant I lifted the window, was the same instant I regretted it.

The stranger unveiled his hood, showing his complete face to me. I thought wrongly. It wasn’t Mitch… it was my doom.

My heart stopped when Golden spikes came from under the hood. As he gave me a breathtaking stare. The black hooded Hollister model was the knocker. No one close to who I thought. Someone far out of range of possible suspects.

Korbyn!

He would not release me from his stare. “I heard everything.” He muttered with a stoic face. His expression was not showing. I couldn’t pick up anything good. What was this about?

“You heard what?” I tried to stall, trying to appear unafraid. “And why were you knocking on my window?” I tried to go along not showing him emotion either. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”

Korbyn lifted his reflective green eyes up to mine. “I heard everything you and Mitch said. The baby, the family…and I jolted out of there when I saw you leaving with him.” Korbyn was viciously saying. He was trying to retain his emotions but he was failing.

A lonely tear dripped in one long stream down his left side. He covered his face with his hand to hide the escaping emotions.

“Korbyn, the only thing Mitch did, was bring me home.” I told him, watching his hand remove from his eyes. He looked up at me.

Then he answered, “Is he in your room right now? Did you sleep with him?” he came off as if he was accusing me of something. I knew he was trying to maintain a low voice and his composure, but when that tear fell I knew it meant something different.

“No! Why would he-“

“I followed you both here. So where is he?” Korbyn jumped in before I could finish my statement. He kept going on like he was convinced Mitch was in my room.

“He went home.. I went to sleep ‘alone’.” I almost spat trying to tell him. Then a thought came to me. “Hey, weren’t you sleep on the couch when Mitch was talking to me?”

“I was pretending.” He told me in a solid breath. “I knew those guys were there for more than what you and Jade claimed. So I took it upon myself to find out.”

What was he inspecting me for?

“Well all you found out was he took me home.” I gave an attitude.

“You are so stupid.” He said scowling. “What does it take for you to see?” he added baring his braces at me.

This is what I’m talking about. One minute Korbyn is a friend, then out of nowhere he turns into the enemy. If he came by to be enemies with me again, that was fine. Or if he wanted out of the clique he should have said so sooner.

“Okay, you know what, I’m not having this. I don’t care who you are anymore, or why you came. Don’t come on my territory trying to insult me.” As I was going off, he just gave me the same stare he held since I first lifted the window. His hands were stuffed inside the black hoodie, trying to keep warm in the windy winter. “Listen to me. Don’t disturb me anymore. If anyone is stupid, it has to be you! Who knocks on someone’s window at this time of the night?...” I gave him time to answer. When he didn’t. I kept going. “Only idiots. We are saving this conversation for another day. Because right now, I’m sleepy and if you thought you could just come up-“

My rain of venom came to a stop. It was another unexpected event.

His admirably soft lips caressed mine. It was a swift sweet everlasting taste. My lips were quivering from the softness, and the pull he had over me. The outcome of this was not in mind. How did that just happen?

“Shut up.” He whispered, letting his lips brush over mine saying, “You’ve always been sexy when you’re fussy.”

Is this happening?? I started question myself over and over again. I didn’t know how to take this.

“Why did you always argue and fight with me?” I asked him.

“For one, I liked to see you fight back. The feistiness was an art to me. It was the only way I could communicate with you. I wasn’t sure how to get your attention. Because everything else I thought of was useless.” His lips were moving against my lips as he murmured the words.

That explains every fight, and all the dirty looks. He didn’t know any other approaches. Tonight, after hearing Mitch talking to me, his jealousy motivated him to try a new approach. An approach he probably thought of a million times but denied it because of uncertainty.

“So you’ve been my-“

“Your admirer.” He finished for me in an enticing whisper. He gazed at me with a sorrowful appearance to the face. “I’m openly sorry if I caused you hurt in any form. It wasn’t my intention. My motives meant something deeper.” He grabbed both of my hands as he spoke and pleaded. Another tear slid down. This time he couldn’t stop it, and it hit the skin of my hand.

“It’s…it’s okay.” I stammered trying to breathe. It was cold in my room from the wind blowing through the open window. It was getting harder to contain my feelings. It came to the point I didn’t know if chills were coming from the cold or from Korbyn.

“I had to confess this to you. Now I probably can sleep better when I’m alone.” He slowly blinked back a flood of another tear. He then gripped me in a hug for a long minute. Then as he pulled away he kissed me through the open window again. Like it was the last time he would ever kiss me.

“Think of me while you are laying down, or….this short moment we shared tonight.” He was rubbing his hand over the gold spikes. “I want you to think about what a relationship with me would be like.” He exhaled, stepping back from the window like he was about to leave.

He felt around the pockets of his hoodie searching for something. When he didn’t find whatever it was. He shoved his hands into his pants pockets. “Here listen to this song, while you think my offer over.” He gave me a piece of paper with something written on it.

Those were his last words before he left me in my room to think. I shut my window, blocking out the winter. I grabbed my phone and began searching for the song that he wrote on the piece of paper. I thought I could get a quick listen to it from my phone while I laid here to think about our verbal fights, and all of our disagreements. I had to see if a relationship would be the best thing with us.

I found the song: Santeria by sublime.

The song started to play while I thought. I already knew deep in my heart having a relationship with this model of a guy was possible. The night, wouldn’t let me forget his romantic approach at my window. How many risks it took him to do that. It took a better man to come to the home of someone he never got along with and tell him how he truly felt.

It was romantic for my enemy to morph into Romeo, then confess his heart. He was admiring me, because I moved in my own way. He came to my window just to see about me. I still wish we didn’t have to go through the fights we did just to get where we were tonight. It’s crazy but I didn’t want to take back those bad times. They were moments that made tonight even more spectacular than what it was.

The first semester of school was ending. My relationship with Korbyn headed off great. In public we were friends/flirters, but when we were alone. Our emotions came out fully. Korbyn had this aura on him that made me feel complete. I could feel that lonely black hole inside of me closing. Our relationship was pleasing, I love how he made me his priority. Even Jade liked the way we looked together. Well… that’s what he said but I wasn’t too sure. He seemed to give Korbyn a warning look everytime they talked. Jade told me one day: ‘If he hurts you Braylon, I’m going to kill him.’

We still ran the school. Jade had C.J. at his side, and I had Korbyn at my side. Nothing changed between my clique except we all were in a relationship. What I loved the most was how everything turned out. Who ever said anything about me in the stores, or whoever didn’t like me, Korbyn use his nasty comments to demean them for his Braylon. How could I not smile at him?

He always tells me ‘we were always meant to be.’ I can only hope so. All I can do is savor the happy days. Savor the goodness and savor the precious time we share.

We were officially together. I was no longer alone, and knowing that gave me a solid fulfillment. Everything I wanted in a relationship came in the form of Korbyn. My admirer.

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THE END