New York or Bust!!! - 1. Chapter 1

“Get up, we’re wasting daylight!” My sister’s high-pitched squeal issued from just beyond my bedroom door. Grumbling, I rolled over and sat up in the bed. My morning wood needed coaxing before it decided to behave. I didn’t have time to relax. Glancing over at the clock on my nightstand, I shuddered.

Too many days. Too many damn days of being on the road with my sister and her best friend, scouting colleges as far away from here as they could possibly get. The thought worried me a little. Growing up in the middle of nowhere, it seems easy enough to leave it behind. It is the rest of the world that may not wait around for the middle-of-nowhere people to catch up. To try in college so far away from rescue seemed a bit, well, stupid.

“I was just about to wake you, dear,” Mom said as she passed my bedroom door. “I would have managed it without an excited squeal.”

“Can’t you just tell her no to New York?” I asked one last time to hopefully convince Mom that my bratty twin sister was going too far away. We were Iowa people. Farming people. The only mornings I woke up thrilled about opening my eyes were on opening day of baseball and deer season.

“She has to see it for herself, Wes,” Mom countered, smiling, but I noticed her clutch my sister’s dirty shirt a bit tighter in both hands.

“Think that will scare some sense into her?” I asked, reaching up and attempting to smooth out my hair. We may have a road trip planned, but I still had chores to finish before leaving. So did she, which had probably sat neglected so far this morning.

“It better,” Mom answered, smiling. “We can’t afford any of them schools out there.”

“She’ll understand that,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Save us a trip; you need our help ‘round here, anyway.”

“Well, I trust the both of you not to fall off the face of the earth during this trip,” she said, leaning against the doorframe. “Well, at least keep your sister from doing so, please.”

“I’ll try,” I said, standing up and grabbing a pair of socks before sliding on my boots. They were getting old and were stained with any number of things.

“You two have been stuck on this farm most of your lives,” Mom said, repeating the lecture she gave me the first time Tessa brought up her desire to visit New York to see if any of the colleges excited her.

It wasn’t like I didn’t want to go, though. I was excited to get on the road, to see more than just our five-hundred-acre farm. I wanted to get away from the corn and the cows. I just hated leaving Mom here to do most of our chores for the time it took us to get there, see some sights, and get back home – all the while hoping that my sister’s dreams would become a bit more small scale. Being twins, she automatically became my first friend. We drifted apart some over the years, when I started playing baseball and she started cheerleading. We got our own friends, new best friends.

My best friend Tucker Davis was already accepted to be a pitcher at the University of Iowa. He will be leaving in a couple of weeks. I hated not being there to give him the proper sendoff, with beer on the water tower overlooking the rolling fields. I would see him, though; the University of Iowa wasn’t difficult to find.

Sighing when Mom disappeared down the hall chasing after Tess, I stood and left my room. I didn’t stop to look around at the messy living room, covered with more luggage than we owned – borrowed from the neighbors.

Instead, I knew the time for me to get my morning chores done was quickly running out before we hit the road. Walking out the swinging screen door, I looked around at the scattered chickens. On seeing me, they all scrambled towards me. Frowning, it was impossible not to miss that Tessa hadn’t fed them yet.

“I’ll get to y’all in a minute,” I said, shuffling my feet through the horde, leaving them to squawk and chatter in protest.

Ignoring them, I walked into the barn and scratched Tae’s head as she poked it out of her stall. I would miss riding her on days where work didn’t exhaust me too bad. She nickered when I walked on past her to the stockroom where all the feed was kept.

After scooping out what I needed into buckets, I grabbed two and walked out of the barn. Knowing that the chickens were the most desperate I started with them and led them back towards their coop before pouring their food out on the ground. Then I stepped inside, grabbing the woven basket that hung on a nail just inside the coop. I walked down the small aisle, bent over to keep from hitting my head, to all the nests and collected the eggs already laid this morning.

“I was going to do that, Wes,” Tessa said from just outside of the door. “I was just making sure I packed everything I needed.”

“You did that all day yesterday,” I countered over my shoulder. “Do you have anything left to your name unpacked?”

“Rambo,” she answered, and I smiled thinking of her black gelding stabled beside Tae. If anything could get her back to Iowa it would be him. She had him spoiled rotten.

“Have you been in to feed him yet?” I asked, and when I didn’t hear an answer, I turned, after picking the eggs out from under an angry hen, to see that she had already left.

When I stepped outside, I wiped my forehead with my forearm, looking around. I didn’t understand why Tessa wanted to leave this place. It had everything we both had ever known. She got her first kiss out on the tire swing from her on-and-off-again boyfriend, Peter, the quarterback who barely graduated but is still going to college on a full athletic scholarship – to Northern Iowa in the fall. It was home; everything in me wanted to stay. College felt like an inconvenience, a necessary next step that Mom and Dad didn’t have to take. Farming wouldn’t support me forever, though; the times had already changed.

I was going into Wildlife and Forestry management. I could choose between a couple of community colleges to get most of what I would need to graduate, but I had put that off and planned on putting it off until last minute.

After placing the basket of eggs on the front porch for Mom to pick up, I took the second bucket I had to the back of the barn, bypassing Tessa who was feeding Rambo sugar cubes, and dumped the food into a trough for the pigs.

“He’s fat enough Tessa,” I said, walking back to the stock room to grab the other two buckets. I ignored her as I dumped half of the horse feed into Rambo’s bucket and the other half into Tae’s. Then I took a pitchfork and refilled their hay.

“He’s going to miss me,” she said, scratching him just behind the ear. He had his eyes closed, enjoying every second of it.

“Do you even want to go?” I asked, leaning against the stalls. “Or is this Nikki’s idea of fun?”

“I want to go,” she said. “You don’t know how bad I want to get out of here.”

“You don’t think it’s a bit far?” I asked, and she grimaced, not wanting to have this argument again.

“Just because you and Nikki had a falling out,” Tessa started, and I shook my head walking back into the stockroom to put all the buckets back.

“She cheated on me,” I said, not really caring. I knew what Nikki was all about before I dated her. It is why I dated her. I knew she would get fed up with me after a while and look for attention from more willing guys, and I would be innocent of the whole mess. No questions asked.

“Well, I didn’t like you two together, anyway,” Tessa said. “She’s a bit of a slut.”

“Yeah,” I said. “Don’t think she graduated without working her way through every locker room in school.”

“Now don’t start trouble with her, Wes,” she said, shaking her finger at me as I stepped out to stand by the stalls. “She’s been to New York; we’d be lost without her.”

“She went one time,” I said, smiling. “To a funeral.”

“She still went there,” Tessa said, sounding proud of herself for winning the argument. She knew I would give up. I was only going in order to keep Tessa out of trouble; that, and Mom was making me.

“We need to get into the truck and feed the cows,” I said, and she grimaced.

“But I’ll stink,” she whined. “Make Mom go.”

“She has to do it every morning with us gone, Tess,” I countered. “We can do it for her once before we leave.”

“I don’t know why she’s making you go with us,” Tessa hissed, crossing her arms. “You don’t want to leave; you don’t feel so trapped here.”

“Stop being dramatic,” I countered. “You were in here crying over leavin’ a horse; you’re not sold on New York, either.”

“No, but I know I want out of here,” she said looking around. “Just away from the barns, corn, cows, and Peter Donnley.”

“Ouch, poor Peter,” I said, and she slapped me on the arm, rolling her eyes.

“I know New York is too far away and too expensive,” she said, leaning against the stall doors to face me. “But I want to go see it, just to see it.”

“Okay,” I said, not being able to argue with that. Part of me wanted to see it, too.

“Let’s go feed the cows so we can get the hell out of here,” she said, giving Rambo the last sugar cube in her hand. I grabbed the two bags of feed and wrestled them into the wheelbarrow before I followed her outside the barn.

She was already sitting in the driver’s seat. Mom was out on the front porch, the basket of eggs in her hand. She waved as I dumped the two sacks of feed into the back of the truck. There was already a shovel, and after I climbed into the back and sat on the rail, Tessa took off down the dirt road to the gate.

The cows, hearing the truck, were already waiting for us by the time we got to their pasture field. I hopped off and opened the gate, closing it behind Tessa after she drove through. I had to fight my way through the cows to get back to the truck. When I climbed back on, Tessa hit the gas and sent me and the feed flying towards the tailgate.

“Sorry!” she screamed out of her window. “Stupid thing is sticking again.”

“Yeah,” I said, shaking my head as she drove to the middle of the field before stopping. I quickly unlatched the tailgate and let it drop; then Tessa slowly made her way through the waiting cows, all of them scrambling towards the back of the truck where I was shoveling their morning food out for them to eat.

The sun was already hot, being the middle of July. It hadn’t rained for a while, so that at least slowed the hay down a bit. I knew it wouldn’t last long, I just hoped it held off long enough for me to get back. Dad worked in a factory all week, and Mom wasn’t really able to do all the work by herself. They were getting older, not having the two of us until later in their marriage. We were their first and only children. Mom said the two of us were plenty; she had wanted a daughter and a son. She was just lucky both of us came along at the same time. Dad was in the military before, and Mom didn’t want to bring up children without him being around full time.

“Julie had her pups last night,” Mom said when we stepped back inside the screen door. “I just checked on her.”

“How many?” I asked as Tessa elbowed through me.

“First shower!” she squealed, and I rolled my eyes as Mom shook her head.

“Six,” she answered smiling. “I was hoping she would have them before you left.”

“Yeah, me, too,” I said, and Mom smiled as I turned and jogged back out the front door. We had been watching Julie for some time. She was getting older, and we would be needing new Border Collies to help us work the cattle between pasture fields. This would put her out of work for a couple of weeks, but Stryker, a new father himself, would be helping Mom while we were away.

Finding her spot in the open stall, I walked in to see her wagging her tail, curled up around her pups. They were all happily nursing, and I reached down and scratched the back of her head behind her stubby ear. It had nearly been ripped completely off by a cow when she was just learning the ropes of cattle driving. Her muzzle had greyed, and she wasn’t as sharp or quick as she used to be.

“Take care of Momma, too,” I said as I stood. She wagged her tail, leaning forward to lick one of her puppies.

When I left the barn, I frowned when I saw a bright-red car driving too fast down our gravel road, a dust cloud spreading out behind it. Nicole Barnes, prom queen, homecoming queen, pretty much everything. She was pretty, and her father owned practically everything in town, easily making them the richest family in our school district. If Tessa hadn’t been slightly better than her as a cheerleader, it was likely that she wouldn’t even be her friend. They belonged to different circles otherwise, and unlike Tessa, Nikki could afford to go to college anywhere she wanted. Her daddy would happily pay any tuition costs. He was probably thrilled that he got her graduated before she ended up pregnant.

“Hi, stud, where’s your sis?” she asked, eyeing me up and down. She pulled her shades off her eyes and nestled them onto the top of her head. She was wearing a pink top and shorts that barely covered anything on her. Mom would purse her lips to keep from frowning completely at the outfit. She hated when I dated her, too.

“Shower,” I answered, wiping the sweat off my forehead before it could drip down into my eyes.

“Nice abs this morning,” she said smiling as she sauntered around her car towards the house. I felt my face flush, and I wanted to shrug into a t-shirt before she got any ideas about the two of us on this trip. I reluctantly followed behind her at a distance. She glanced over her shoulder a couple of times to smile, thinking that I was watching her walk in front of me.

When we were both inside, she eyed the mountain of luggage overtaking the couch in the living room. She frowned, shaking her head, but didn’t say anything as she looked around for Tessa. Mom came into the living room, and I watched her do a double-take before her eyes bypassed Nikki completely and fell on me. It looked like she was regretting making me go with them on this trip, but I was also the only person that would be keeping Tessa out of trouble. I could already picture the arguments between Nikki and me once we got into New York. The fake I.D that allowed her to buy beer here, probably wouldn’t work there, but if it did, I would have to put my foot down.

“Hi, Mrs. Brantley, how are you?” Nikki greeted, leaning against the couch, blocking my path to the hallway that led to the bathroom.

“Fine, Nikki,” she answered, still eying the outfit. “Are you excited about the trip?”

“Very,” she said. “Anything to get out of this dusty hell hole.”

“Nikki,” I groaned. “I need to get by you or we’ll be here all day.”

“Alright, stud,” she said, pushing herself away from the couch. She scooted aside, not wanting me to get any dirt or sweat on her. I didn’t waste any time walking down the hallway to the bathroom. The door was open, so I stepped inside and locked it behind me, cursing under my breath.

After a quick shower, I wrapped a towel around my waist and opened the door to find Mom leaning against the wall. She had a dishrag thrown over her shoulder and some wisps of hair had fallen from her ponytail.

“I want you on your best behavior, young man,” she said, cocking her eyebrow.

“Where’s Nikki and Tess?” I asked, hoping neither of them were close enough to overhear the two of us.

“Attempting to shove all of the luggage into the trunk of her car,” Mom answered, crossing her arms. “That girl is dressed to ruin herself and God knows what else.”

“Mom,” I said, rolling my eyes while holding firm to my towel to keep it from falling. “Don’t worry about Nikki and me; she annoys the hell out of me.”

“Language,” Mom snapped, but she smiled. “Keep them safe.”

“I promise,” I said, and she kissed me on the cheek before she made her way back down the hall as I stepped across it to my bedroom. I locked the door behind me, never being too sure I wouldn’t be busted in on, as excited as they both seemed to be. I was likely holding them up as it was, but I was okay with that as I slowly dried off and dressed in a pair of jeans and a Hawkeye t-shirt.

When I stepped back into the living room, only my bags were left to be packed away. I only packed three, not really knowing how many clothes I would need for a road trip to New York. It would be the first real vacation any of us ever had, and I hated that it couldn’t be with Mom and Dad.

“You look like a hick,” Nikki grimaced, and I shrugged, grabbing two of my three bags and stepping around her to the front door. “But your ass looks good in those jeans.”

“Nikki,” I hissed, knowing Mom was in the kitchen, quickly making us a snack for the road.

“Too bad I never got to see it properly,” she whispered, walking by me to hold open the door. I quickly stepped out and down the stairs, not slowing down until I was at the trunk. I frowned as I watched Tessa shove her last bag inside. It left no real space for any of mine.

“You’ll have to leave something,” I said, turning to look at her.

“No, I don’t,” she said, crossing her arms. She was too distracted to notice that she had messed up her hair and had a sheen of sweat on her forehead. If we stayed too long, she would need another shower before we were allowed to leave.

“Where am I supposed to put my shit?” I asked, shrugging off the bags. I looked over my shoulder to see Nikki carrying my third bag out to the car.

“Shove it in anywhere,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “It’s just clothes, right?”

“Yeah,” I answered, “why, what did you bring?”

“The essentials,” she answered, rolling her eyes.

“Deodorant and a toothbrush is all I need,” I said. “I’m glad I have a dick.”

“Shut up,” she snapped as I shoved one of my bags on top of the pile.

After everything was packed away, I had to sit on the trunk before it latched securely. I tugged on it a few times to make sure it wouldn’t come flying open. Knowing that my three bags were on top and they would be the first three that hit the highway and got run over by whatever was following unsuspectingly behind us.

“Here’s some sandwiches,” Mom said, holding up a small cooler. Nikki shook her head and avoided the cooler, not wanting to accept it, and I took it. “There’s a few sodas in there, too.”

“Thanks, Momma,” I said, and Mom grabbed Tessa and wrapped her into a hug, kissing her on the cheek. When she broke the embrace, I saw the tears streaming down her face as she turned on me and wrapped me into a hug as well.

“Be safe, all three of you,” she said, her voice soft and cracking as she wiped her face with her hands.

“No big deal, Mrs. Brantley, New York is nothing,” Nikki said, waving her hand as she slid into the driver’s seat. I hesitated until Tessa shoved me towards the back seat, and I slid in behind her as Nikki pushed the button for the top of her red convertible to slide slowly out of the way, and after a short wave, we were speeding down the gravel road.

***** **** ***** ***** **** *****

“This is so exciting!” Tessa yelled over the blaring rock music. Both of them wearing shades. It was between choruses, and I cringed knowing both of them would be singing again shortly.

“I know, right!” Nikki yelled, taking her eyes completely off the road as she sped down the straight-but-empty flat roads the Midwest had to offer.

We had been riding nonstop for hours, wanting to put as much distance between us and the State of Iowa, which we left some hours ago. We were officially well beyond the suitable miles for a U-turn, and I realized that I was stuck with them for the entirety of this trip.

The short conversations they had never really included me. Hell, it never included more than what I just heard for the hundredth time. After Nikki’s response, Tessa would go back to texting their friends on Nikki’s phone, attempting to make all of their friends stuck back home jealous of our trip. All the while, I wished I had brought something with me, although I wouldn’t know exactly what that was. The back of the car was too cramped for my guitar and the music too loud for me to hear what I was attempting to play. I never was into video games, so I never bought a Game Boy or anything like that.

I was stuck in my own personal hell for miles on top of miles, and I was just now starting to realize what I had really gotten myself into. What I had imagined didn’t compare to this at all. I was at least hoping for a lot of rest stops for one of them to pee. Tessa never got too far into the hay work without having to run back to the house to use the bathroom. I had thought her bladder was abnormally small, but they had finished off all the sodas hours ago, and neither of them seemed like they were about to start complaining. I had at least hoped to be driving by now, to give me something to do.

“When can we stop?” I asked, leaning forward after the latest song ended and Nikki turned down the volume to drown out the commercials.

“I have the GPS marked for a gas station, it says about twenty miles,” Nikki answered, glancing up at me through the rearview mirror. “Why?”

“Just wondered,” I answered, shrugging and preparing to sit back and wait.

“You’ve not said much since we left,” Nikki yelled over the wind that blew her hair. “You’re going to suck this entire trip.”

“Yeah, he is,” Tessa added, sticking her tongue out at me. “He didn’t want to come.”

“I knew that,” Nikki said, turning to glance at me. I sucked in a breath when the car drifted from her lane towards the center.

“Watch where you’re goin,” I said, and she smiled and stepped on the gas a few moments before turning back to the road.

“Try not to be a loser, Stud,” she said, and Tessa turned around to laugh at me.

“I don’t think it’s possible,” Tessa added, “I was born with all the good stuff.”

“Only if you had a dick, Tess, you’d be perfect,” Nikki said, and Tessa squealed and shoved Nikki’s shoulder. The car lurched, and I dug my hands into the leather seat as I slid around, only being held in place by the seat belt.

“Tess!” I yelled, and they both laughed. and Nikki slammed her hand on the car horn.

“This is so exciting, a road trip to New York!” Nikki yelled, and I rolled my eyes, mouthing the usual, ‘I know, right,’ response.

“Can I drive after we stop?” I asked, “I’m bored as fuck.”

“Oh, language,” Tessa said smiling. “Little brother is annoyed.”

“I was only born seven minutes after your fat ass,” I said, shaking my head. Nikki laughed when Tessa reached back behind her seat, trying to hit me. She was more than two pounds larger than me when we were born, but now I towered over her. For some reason, she thought it was a bad thing to be a chubby baby; it wasn’t like any evidence of that had lingered on her body. Still, any time I wanted, I knew bringing it up won me most arguments. Especially if I said it in front of her friends or out where people could hear us.

“Oh, for fuck sakes,” Nikki groaned, and I felt the car decelerating. I looked up to see a horse and buggy directly in front of us. Looking around I saw rolling fields with cows, a person plowing the field with two large horses. All of the houses were white with black shutters that actually looked to be more than just decoration.

“Pass it!” Tessa yelled, and Nikki darted into the opposite lane, only having to dart back behind the buggy to miss an oncoming car.

“Fuck,” she hissed, “well this ruins everything.”

“How far away are we from the gas station?” I asked, rolling my eyes at both of their impatience. We had all the time in the world to get to New York. The sun was nearly completely set, though, and I wanted the car to be filled back up and us back on the road in search for a hotel before it got much later.

“About five miles,” Nikki said, glancing back down at her GPS stationed on her dashboard.

“Well, there’ll be a better spot to pass it before then,” I said, leaning back against my seat, already looking forward to our first pit stop.

Then the car accelerated as she darted out from behind the horse and buggy for a second time. In the waning light, only car headlights would really tell us if anything was coming. It was only when we pulled even with the horse and buggy on the wrong side of the road that we could see the other horse and buggy barrelling toward us. I heard Tessa and Nikki both begin to scream, Nikki, too surprised, didn't slam on her brakes; instead, the car lurched faster.

“Brakes, Nikki!” I yelled, but we were already too close for it to matter. Not wanting to hit the horses head on, Nikki turned the wheel sharply, and we slid off the road, bouncing through the shallow drainage ditch, and even I screamed when we collided with the large wall of a barn.

Luckily, the wood gave way pretty easily, so the impact was minimal. The airbags deployed and everything went dark as the car came to a stop somewhere inside the barn we just crashed into. None of us was screaming any longer, but I could hear Nikki groaning and Tessa crying as both of them struggled with the airbags as they deflated.

“Tessa!” I yelled. “Tessa, are you okay?”

“I don’t know,” she answered as I struggled to unlatch my seatbelt with my shaking hands. I had to reach up to rub the dirt out of my eyes before I could really see anything.

The first thing I noticed was that half a dozen horses were running from the barn as the cloud of dust and hay started to settle around us. The car’s engine had died, and the front of it looked to be a mangled mess, one that it likely never would recover from.

“Nikki, are you alright?” I asked, climbing my way out of the back of the car through the loose boards that we dragged with us. When she didn’t say anything, I got worried and ran over to her side of the car to see her staring out the broken windshield. Blood was trickling down her chin from a busted lip, and she had some scratches on her arms and legs.

“Wes,” Tessa cried, reaching for me. I ran around the front of the car and threw her door open. I pulled her into my arms, and I had to support her when she collapsed into them.

“It’s okay, I need to make sure Nikki isn’t hurt too bad,” I said, and I heard voices yelling from just beyond the barn.

“What the fuck happened?” Nikki asked, and I looked over Tessa’s shoulder to see that she was unhooking her seatbelt, finally snapping out of the shock of the wreck.

“You ran us through a barn,” I answered as three men, a couple of women, and a bunch of kids came running into the barn. I instantly realized they were Amish and didn’t know if they were going to be at all friendly. Some of our neighbors back home were Amish and friendly, but not every community was the same, and we had just put a giant hole through a barn that probably took them awhile to build by hand.

“Are you people okay?” The oldest man asked as he waved for the children to stop running towards us.

“I believe so,” I answered, Tessa still clinging to me as hard as she could. “Just banged up.”

“Just banged up,” Nikki hissed, and I shook my head to stop her. “Look at my car!”

“We see it, miss,” the man said. “It is sitting in the middle of our barn.”

“We’re sorry,” I said gently, pulling Tessa out of the embrace and tucking her under my arm.

“It is better you hit the barn than my wife returning home with my youngest children,” he countered, the anger barely contained in his voice. “I see you got the worst of it.”

“I say the car and the barn did, father,” one of the younger boys said, then clinged bashfully to one of the women when he turned to shoot him a glare. Then it surprised me when they all started laughing and walking towards us. The one woman with the young boy still clutched to her apron motioned for us to follow them.

“I’ll take you to the phone,” she said, “if you’re able to walk.”

“I am,” I said, “Tessa?”

“I’m staying with you,” she said, and we both watched Nikki hobbling around the car, tears streaming down her face as she took in the wreckage.

“We have a cell phone somewhere,” I said, looking back towards the car.

“You won’t get anyone out here using those,” she said. “We own a business down the road a ways; we take calls there.”

“Okay, please lead the way,” I said, and she smiled and pulled her son off her apron, and a young girl took his hand and led him away.

“We better get them horses secured,” a younger man said, and I looked up to see him scratching the back of his head looking over the car. He looked saddened by the state of it until he caught me looking at him, and he frowned and followed everyone else out of the barn.

“Do you think it will stay up?” A woman asked the older-looking man. He had a black hat on, his shirt open a few buttons down from the collar, covered in dirt. He shook his head.

“No, don’t think it will,” he said, and as I walked away from the wreckage, I looked closer at the barn to see that it was leaning to one side. I grimaced, hoping it wouldn’t come crashing down around the car before we could get it out of the hole we made.

“Hurry along,” the woman said when we fell slightly behind her. I could tell she wanted us squared away, probably out of their hair as soon as possible, with the way she hurried us down the gravel road.

“It’s so dark,” Nikki whined from the other side of me. She was limping, so I let her lean against my other side. With both of them leaning against me, I walked slower to keep from tripping and sending all three of us crashing to the ground.

“It’s just down there in that little shed,” she said, pointing towards the only part of the property that had a light. Beside it was a telephone pole with a wire, the shed itself no larger than a phone booth, but made out of wood with a metal roof.

“Thank you,” I said, and she smiled.

“I will wait just in case you need anything,” she said, but she looked back towards the sound of her family rounding up the frightened horses.

“Do we need an ambulance?” I asked, “How do you two feel? I’d feel better if…”

“No,” Nikki hissed, crossing her arms. “Just let me call Daddy.”

“He’s all the way in Iowa,” I said, shrugging her off my shoulder. I started walking towards the shed with the phone, both of them following along beside me. “We all can’t fit.”

“Yes, we can,” Nikki argued and pushed me out of the way when we got to the door. I sighed and followed her inside, with Tessa leaning against the open door. In the light of the small shed, I grimaced. She was pale, her hair in a disheveled nest on top of her head. Blood from a cut was staining some of her soft blonde hair a crimson red. It didn’t look like it was a bad cut, though.

“Look in the phone book for a towing company,” I said as Nikki grabbed the phone.

“What the fuck kind of phone is this?” she asked, and when I looked down I saw that it was a rotary phone.

“There’s another one beside it,” I answered, pointing to the white one hanging on the wall. I was relieved to see it, though, not knowing how to work that rotary phone myself.

“Oh, thank God,” she hissed, ignoring the phone book sitting beside the rotary phone.

“I’d watch what you say too, Nikki,” I said. “We’ve upset them all enough as it is.”

“I could care less, Wes,” she countered, quickly dialing a number.

“We don’t have the money to pay for them to fix their barn,” Tessa whispered, “or the car.”

“I don’t think the car is fixable anyways,” I said, and I saw that she was crying again.

“What are we going to do here?” she asked, looking around. “Are you hurt?”

“I’ll be sore in the morning,” I said, already feeling the beating I took from the back seat. I hadn’t got anywhere near the worst of it though.

“But, Daddy!” Nikki suddenly yelled. “It wasn’t my fault; Wes was driving.”

“You bitch; he was not!” Tessa yelled before I could stop her.

“Be quiet!” I hissed, yanking the phone from Nikki’s grasp.

“Sir,” I said into the receiver, cutting him off. “I wasn’t driving when we wrecked.”

“Are you calling my daughter a liar?” he asked, his voice shaken, but he seemed to be somewhere between relieved and angry.

“Yes,” I answered, “she’s just scared, I think, but she was driving.”

“Well, what happened?” he asked, and I looked over at Nikki.

“She dodged a deer,” I lied, lowering my voice, hoping that would ease her father down a few notches. “And hit a barn.”

“A barn,” he yelled, “where are you calling from?”

“I have no clue, sir,” I said, “I’ll need to get off here and find out so we can get the car towed.”

“Nikki has my credit card; just go get checked out at the hospital and come straight home,” he said, “all three of you.”

“What will that cost?” I asked, my heart still hammering in my chest. “We have to pay to fix the barn too, right?”

“Her insurance will pay for that,” he said, sounding unsure himself. “Right?”

“I have no idea!” I said, shaking my head.

“Well, I’m sure I have enough to pay your share of the damages,” he said. “Your parents will just have to owe me.”

“But, sir,” I said, feeling my face getting hot. “I wasn’t driving, I didn’t hit the barn, I wasn’t trying to pass…”

“To pass?” he asked, and I took the phone away from my ear and cursed under my breath. When I put it back to my ear, I could hear him arguing with someone in the background.

“Hello?” I asked, and I heard him shuffle the phone around.

“Tell me the truth, Wes Brantley, so help me, son,” he said, and I could picture him red-faced, his black mustache bristling over his top lip as he waited for me to come up with a suitable answer.

“She tried to pass an Amish buggy and had to leave the road to miss another one coming our direction,” I explained. “We hit the barn; they’ll have to tear it down and rebuild it.”

“Well, that is their problem,” he answered, and my eyes narrowed. “Just put my daughter back on the phone so I can figure where you’re at so I can send for a tow and a rental.”

“Fine,” I said and handed the phone back to her. She snatched it from my hand, and I sighed and left the shed to see that the woman had been joined by the older man. He was wiping his face with a white handkerchief. When he saw me, he tucked it into his pocket and waved me to where he stood.

“What are you three planning on doing?” he asked, and I glanced behind me not really wanting to answer for Nikki, even if I knew what she would say.

“I guess, get someone to come tow the car out,” I answered, “of the barn I mean.”

“The place down the road works on cars,” he answered, pointing in the direction. “I doubt that one will be ready for a while, if it can be salvaged at all.”

“I know,” I said. “My friend is calling in a rental.”

“None of those will be here until sometime tomorrow,” he answered, shaking his head. “You three need to go see a doctor.”

“I think we’re just scraped and bruised up a bit,” I said, although I would feel better if Tessa and Nikki would agree to go. “We’d have to find a hospital this time of night, anyhow. Do you know where a hotel is?”

“About an hour on down the road,” he answered, and I grimaced.

“It’s not like you can steal anything; you don’t have anywhere to put it,” he said, reaching up and taking off his hat. “The girls can sleep in the office there; we have some couches. There’s a bathroom with running water for our customers. Don’t get any blood anywhere, and if you do, clean it up.”

“Thank you, sir,” I said, and I heard him fumbling for keys in his pocket.

“We have clothes in the trunk of the car,” Tessa said from behind me. I jumped, not hearing her approach. “Can we please go get them?”

“Ruth, go tell William and the older kids to help get their bags, then put the younger ones to bed,” he said, and I watched as she nodded and walked back towards the way we came.

“I could go help,” I said feeling helpless.

“Stay with the young ladies,” he said. “When they’re settled in, you can bunk with William. I don’t expect any more trouble out of the three of you or I’d be sending you down the road already.”

“No, sir,” I said. “We won’t be any trouble.”

“Well, Daddy is sending for a tow truck, and the rental will be on the way by tomorrow afternoon,” Nikki said, attempting to wipe the dirt from her pink shirt.

“I expect you girls to at least cover yourselves a bit more modestly while you stay here,” he said, and he turned abruptly and walked over to a building barely illuminated by the streetlight out front.

“What do you mean, stay here?” Nikki asked, crossing her arms. “I am not staying here. These people are creepy.”

“Keep your voice down, Nikki,” Tessa snapped. “What else can we do, walk in the dark?”

“We have a place to sleep and get cleaned up if we don’t cause any trouble,” I said, interrupting the fight that was about to break out between the two of them. “Please don’t mess that up, Nikki.”

“I would rather sleep in the car,” she said, “if I knew it wouldn’t blow up.”

“You have a bathroom and a couch in that building,” I said, pointing to it. “You can get cleaned up and changed, please, into a pair of jeans or something.”

“Fine,” she said, pulling Tessa after her, and I followed at a distance behind them, not really wanting to leave them alone. I didn’t know these people, but I knew they had rules about this sort of thing. They wouldn’t want me anywhere around the girls unsupervised. We were guests, unwelcome guests. So the least we could do would be to listen to their demands if they kept us from having to sleep in a gas station or out in a car in a barn that may not stay upright.

“The bathroom is right down the hall from the office. Please do not open the filing cabinets or get into the desk. I know everything in this place, so I will know if something has been stolen,” he said as Tessa and Nikki stood against the wall listening to him. When he saw me, he frowned and waved his hand for me to wait outside. When I finally turned, he followed me out.

“I’m sorry, again,” I said, and he smiled.

“I’m scaring you,” he said, shaking his head. “I have a short temper sometimes.”

“I don’t blame you,” I said. “We nearly took out your wife.”

“But you managed to only wreck my barn,” he said, “so I am at least thankful for their lives.”

“I feel bad about that,” I grimaced thinking about how close we came to shattering his entire world, or at least most of it. I glanced toward the dimly lit building to where I last saw Tessa, the urge to stay and protect her washing over me. I knew she was relatively okay, and everything could have been a lot worse.

“Here come my older children with your things,” he said, and I turned to see them walking down the road, one girl holding a lantern to light their paths. They had our bags loaded onto a small flatbed wagon with tiny wheels. There were only two of them, a girl about thirteen or fourteen and a guy that had to be around our age.

“Thank you,” I said, and the older man walked inside to retrieve the girls. They followed him outside, and the fourteen year old girl helped them carry their bags inside the building. When I attempted to help, the older man shot me another glare. I finally resigned myself to not seeing my sister again until morning.

“They had a lot more bags than you,” the older man said, turning towards the door, and I heard the younger man stifle a laugh. “I’m locking the door; they can flip the lock from the inside if they need to.”

“Okay,” I said, and I glanced behind me one last time before following the three of them back up the road towards the houses.

“Go on to bed, Mary,” the man ordered, and the young girl nodded and walked away.

“I am sorry for your accident,” the older man said as we came to a stop in front of a second barn, “and not being as polite as usual.”

“Thanks, sir,” I said, and he tipped his head slightly.

“William, don’t stay up too late,” he said. “We’ve got more work than usual to do tomorrow.”

“Right, sir,” he said, and I grabbed two of my bags, wincing, already sore. He grabbed the other one and threw the strap over his shoulder. “The loft is up the stairs as soon as you enter the barn.”

“Thanks,” I said, watching him as he turned the small wagon around.

“I have to put this back; it will give you time to change your clothing,” he said, and I nodded and entered the barn.

I could hear horses stomping around in stalls, the stale smell of hay and urine that I was accustomed to made me homesick, and I regretted ever agreeing to this trip. I should have fought harder against it. Nikki wasn’t mature enough to get there and back safely; we didn’t even get out of the flattened farmland of the Midwest. The scenery hadn’t changed much, but we were definitely a long day or so away from home as it was.

After finding the stairs, I climbed them, dreading the place I would be sleeping, until I got to a second door. This one led to a small bedroom, obviously just used during the summer, since the window was just the open hay window. There were still piles of hay scattered around the floor, but it had a large water washing bin and three small twin-sized beds on either side of the enclosed room.

I gingerly set my bags down out of the way and quickly opened them, hoping I had the two with my underwear and jeans. Luckily, in the dimness I was able to find a pair of boxer briefs and a pair of shorts that I usually slept in. I quickly kicked off my shoes and slid them against my bag and fumbled out of my jeans, wincing from the stiffness of my muscles. Not knowing when William would be coming up the stairs, I quickly stepped out of my boxer briefs and slid on another pair and stepped into my shorts. Then I knelt down at my bags and felt through them looking for a t-shirt, hoping I could find one before he got back. I didn’t really know what the dress code for sleeping would be, but we were both guys, at least.

“I guess I have your bag with your shirts,” he said, and I jumped, standing quickly to see him holding my bag out for me to take. When I took it, he walked past me, and I set it down and grabbed the first shirt that my hands found as he lit a lantern.

“Sorry about the mess we caused,” I said, and he shook his head.

“I’ll have to work a lot more around here now,” he said, and I could hear the anger, but unlike his father, he didn’t try to mask it with politeness. “This year, I could have helped with deliveries and possibly even learned how to drive.”

“Sorry,” I said, and he shook his head.

“You people,” he started, then sighed. “You’ll leave us here with a busted up barn, and maybe that one loud girl will feel bad about her car, but you won’t think about all the trouble…”

“I am thinking about that,” I said, interrupting him. He frowned, holding the lantern towards me, not liking that I interrupted him. “I wish I had the money to pay for it, but I don’t have any.”

“We don’t need money,” he countered, “we have a roofing and furniture business; the women sell baked goods and extra garden stuff.”

“Oh,” I said, noticing that he sounded proud of what they had.

“It’s that stupid barn needing to be rebuilt,” he said, shoving the lantern onto a small table. “You know it will just be me and my oldest cousins. Father and my uncle will be too busy working with most everybody else for the shops.”

“How many cousins do you have?” I asked, and he slid further back on his bed and rested his back against the wall.

“Two that will be helping me build the barn back,” he answered, turning to look out the window. “It will take all summer.”

“Sorry,” I said feeling lame that I kept repeating myself, but didn’t know what else to say.

“You know, if I rammed into something and destroyed it, Dad would beat me something good, then make me rebuild it with my own two hands,” he said, still looking outside. “Do you even know how to work?”

“I grew up on a farm,” I said, crossing my arms, still standing in the middle of the room. “I’ve worked my whole life.”

“Well, there’s that,” he said. “Most people our age don’t know how to hammer a nail.”

“Me and my sister both know how to do that,” I said, walking over to the bed across from his. “I don’t think the loud one, Nikki does, though.”

“Wouldn’t surprise me none,” he answered, sighing. “Father would hate me treating you like this.”

“How old are you?” I asked, sitting down on the bed. It was firm and uncomfortable. The cover felt rough and wooly, probably made from hand by one of the women here.

“Eighteen,” he answered, “you?”

“Eighteen,” I answered, and he smirked.

We fell into an uneasy silence. He didn’t seem to be as annoyed with me as he was earlier. They all seemed at ease around us, probably used to dealing with people because of their businesses. I looked outside to escape his gaze; he looked to be about to ask me more questions, but something had held him back so far.

When I turned to look at him, he looked away, shaking his head. Then the wood-framed bed creaked as he pushed to the side and unfastened his overalls. He hesitated before he started to unbutton his shirt before I turned away to look out the loft’s window again.

I didn’t dare look back around until I heard the bed creak again. When I did, I saw that he was sitting on top of his woolen cover with his shirt off. He kicked off his boots and pulled down the socks. He laid them beside his boots at the foot of the bed. I glanced over at my pile of dirty clothes beside my bags and grimaced. When I turned back to him, he smirked as he stood again.

“We better get to sleep,” he said, and he turned and extinguished the oil lamp. I nodded and rolled the woolen cover down to the foot of the bed, not liking the texture of it. Then I lay down on my back and threw my arm over my forehead, covering my eyes in the bend of my elbow. I heard his overalls hit the floor, the metal buckles thudding against the wooden floor of the barn. I didn’t dare peek out from under my arm. It would be too dark to see much of anything, anyway.

“Good night,” I said, trying to shake off the wreck, the heat of the night, and the fact that I was sleeping just about a yard away from a total stranger. I couldn’t stop thinking about how Nikki and especially Tessa were doing, either. I should have fought harder about the hospital. If I didn’t hate the idea so much, I would have. None of us had seemed all that banged up – just superficial stuff that would cause us to be sore for a week or so. Nothing we couldn’t handle with time.

“The car looked like it would go fast,” he said, and in the stillness of the night I jumped slightly at the sound of his voice. I figured he would ignore me until I fell asleep. “The top was down, the breeze muffling every sound.”

“Yeah,” I said, not wanting to seem like I was trying to ignore him, either. “I never got to really drive it.”

“So it really belonged to that half-naked girl?” he asked, and I knew he would never talk like this in front of anyone else.

“Well, her dad probably bought it, but, yeah,” I answered, moving my arm from my face and turning my head to see him propped up on an elbow looking at me.

“Sorry to bother you, but I won’t sleep,” he said. “I don’t trust you not to kill me in my sleep.”

“Same,” I said, “but at least you’d have good reason to.”

“The big-haul truck we use doesn’t really go fast,” he said, still thinking about the car. “We don’t drive anything other than that thing to get to and from jobs.”

“I would say it’s overrated, but it's not,” I said, and I was surprised when he laughed. “All I have back home is an old rusty truck, I only got it because we needed it around the farm.”

“Did it get you any women admirers?” he asked, his voice lower than it was a moment ago.

“They ran scared of it more,” I answered, not liking the direction the conversation seemed to be going. “Ran over too much cow poop in it.”

“That would probably do it for most English girls,” he said, and I looked over at him when the bed creaked again. The moon had risen, and through the open window I saw that it was giving off a lot of light; it must be nearly full. It allowed for my eyes to adjust to the room to see him better. In the moonlight, though, everything was colorless. Either black or white. I could see that he was sitting up again, the woolen cover draped over his lap as his legs hung over the side of the bed. His chest had a dusting of dark hairs going down to where I couldn’t really see. I made a note to look to see what color his eyes were in the morning; I hated not being able to picture them now.

“What do you have to work on in the morning?” I asked after another uneasy silence fell between us.

“The barn,” he answered, the annoyance only barely resurfacing in his voice. “Dad and my uncle are going down to inspect a roof a couple of miles away. I would have went with them.”

“I’ll help with the barn,” I said, and I heard him snort. I squinted to see him smirking, looking right at my face.

“You’re not sore?” William asked, “I don’t think you’ll be able to get away from your sister and your girl.”

“My girl?” I asked, ignoring the first question. My heart quickened again, and I rolled to sit up in the bed.

“The half-naked one. The other one is your sister, right?” he asked, “You two look a lot alike.”

“I’m not with the half-naked one,” blushing when I didn’t tell him her name. I could only imagine what Nikki would say if she knew how we described her. “I was more or less made to come along to keep them out of trouble.”

“Well, you didn’t do too good at that,” he countered, and I groaned. I hadn’t taken the time to think about what Mom would say. Although it was Nikki driving at the time. I had made her a promise to keep both of them safe and out of harm's way, and here we were, in the middle of nowhere, at the mercy of strangers. Banged, scratched, and bruised with a totaled car in a now-leaning barn.

“No, guess not,” I said, shaking my head.

“There wasn’t anything you could have done,” he said, leaning forward slightly. “You’ll still look like a hero getting them back to wherever you left.”

“Where are we, anyway?” I asked, and I caught myself from leaning forward as well.

“The middle of nowhere,” he answered, sighing. “Barely inside the state of Illinois.”

“Not too good, since we were planning on New York,” I said, noticing his shoulders slump, and he leaned back, scooting all the way back in bed until his back was against the wall of the loft.

“At least the trip back home won’t be too long,” he said, “you’ve gone farther than I ever dreamed already, so there’s that.”

“Do you want to see more?” I asked, “I wouldn’t go to Iowa – more of the same stuff there.”

“No one goes to Iowa,” he countered, and this far away I couldn’t see his face. He sounded like he was joking, but his mood had changed. I wished he wasn’t a stranger so I could know what that meant. If it was Tucker, I could tell what he was thinking just by the way his voice changed and by what he said. Not knowing only made me worry about saying the wrong thing.

“Before this I hadn’t seen much, either,” I said. “This is my first time leaving Iowa.”

“Have you graduated from your high school?” he asked, the sudden change in topic throwing me. The question was rushed, like he had more to ask and waited for my answer.

“Yeah,” I answered, sliding back to the wall on my side of the loft. The wood was rough and uncomfortable, and it tugged at my shirt.

“Did you play sports?” he asked as soon as I got settled against the wall.

“Baseball,” I answered, smiling.

“Have you had many girls?” he asked, his voice lowered. I guessed we finally got to the questions he had wanted to ask earlier but was too afraid to ask.

“No,” I answered, “none, really.”

“But you’re allowed,” he said, “I’m not allowed to date or talk to girls. Only on Sunday afternoons, always being watched by Elders to keep us out of trouble. We live so far away from the other communities I’ve only ever went once.”

“Yeah, I’m allowed,” I said, trying not to feel sorry for him and the way his family lived.

“Then why haven’t you had many?” he asked, and I blinked, wishing there was more light in the room. “You’re probably nice-looking when you don't look like you’ve just walked away from a car crashing into a barn.”

“Thanks,” I said, my face flushing. “I guess I just haven’t found the right person.”

“Girl,” William corrected, and my stomach turned.

“Yeah,” I said, sliding back down into the bed preparing to lie and tell him that I was getting sleepy after all. Anything to get me out of having to talk about myself anymore.

“I don’t have anything to my name,” he said, “nothing but the clothes on my back until I get married, then both families will help us get a good start.”

“Sounds nice of them,” I said as he followed me and crawled back under the cover, resting his head on his bent elbow, still facing me.

“I don’t think…” he started before he sighed, turning away from me. “Well good night; I guess you won’t kill me in my sleep.”

“I promise not to,” I said wondering what he was about to say. I knew it would keep me up the rest of the night wondering.

***** ***** ***** *****

The next morning, the creaking bed beside me startled me enough to wake up. It was still dark outside, and my eyes felt irritated and heavy from not being asleep for long at all. I looked over to see William pulling on a pair of overalls, his back to me. Not bothering with a shirt or his boots, he quickly grabbed his dirty clothes and folded them, laying them at the foot of his bed before he walked quietly out of the loft.

As soon as he closed the door, I sat up and looked through the large window, expecting to see the rest of his family preparing to get the day started. Not seeing anyone, I groaned as I stood; about every muscle I had ached as I walked towards the door, neglecting my own shoes. For some reason, I wanted to know what he was doing awake so early. Maybe he had just stepped outside to pee, but the last thing he said before he rolled over and ignored me, because I think I fell asleep before he did, still bothered me.

When I walked gingerly down the steps, wincing with every step I took. I finally exited the smaller barn and could just see him in the early light of dawn jogging through tall grass towards the tree line. Not wanting to lose him, I took off in a wobbly jog until my muscles limbered up enough to where they didn’t protest.

I had lost him after he disappeared into a small patch of trees. Knowing he could see me still in the open field, I slowed my pace trying to listen. As I got to the tree line I glanced over my shoulder, my heart hammering in my chest. It was already a muggy day, and I glanced up to see clouds covering the stars. It meant a couple more minutes of darkness before the sun rose enough before it didn’t matter.

Stepping into the woods where I thought he went in, I heard a stream in the distance. There I saw him sitting with his back to me on a rock, his toes dipped into the water. It wasn’t much of a stream, but it was a quiet and secluded place that I would probably have sought out before starting a long day of work. Work that, even though I didn’t mind doing, still weighed on my shoulders from time to time. It was more difficult to get some days started than others.

Easing my way closer, I stepped behind a tree, preparing to watch him for a moment or two. I hissed when my foot landed on a small blackberry bush. I jumped back shaking my foot looking towards the stream. He was no longer sitting, and he had turned to see me.

“Why did you follow me?” he asked, walking up to me.

“You woke me up when you left,” I answered, shrugging.

“I didn’t think I did,” he countered, crossing his arms over his chest. He was standing close enough to me for me to see that his eyes were a dark blue. I blinked a few times before I looked away, my face flushing. I really didn’t have a good reason to follow him other than the fact that, for some reason, I thought he was about to confess something to me last night and didn’t.

Something he wouldn’t dare say out loud to anyone. Definitely not to a stranger like me. I also couldn’t help thinking that it was a secret he couldn’t tell family, either. I didn’t understand much about him, but I did understand how a secret like that could weigh on a person. Test a person far beyond their limits. Make them feel alone, surrounded by those people that didn’t share the same secret you kept because you’re just too different. Too different for them to understand you, and all you want from them is to know you enough, just enough for you to be comfortable that you made some sort of a connection with them. Even if it isn’t the connection you wanted but could live with.

“What were you going to say last night?” I asked, and he took a step back, half turning back towards the stream.

“What are you talking about?” he asked, but I could tell he remembered. That he probably guessed why I went out of my way to follow him. Maybe it was why he came here in the first place, to think about it in the safety of being alone.

“I think you know,” I said, crossing my arms to keep from reaching out to stop him from bolting. I would let him if he did. He didn’t have to tell me. I knew I was being a shit for asking.

Before I could react, he reached out and pushed me against the tree that I had attempted to hide behind. My foot landed back into the blackberry bush, but his weight kept me from bouncing away from it like I had before. Pain shot through me as the thorns punctured the bottom of my foot. His hands were on my chest, and I thought I was about to get my ass kicked, or at least he was about to try. We were about the same height, about half-an-inch difference; doing mostly the same work, we both were built similarly. My access to the gym during baseball season meant that I was a bit more toned, but he felt just as strong as I was. I was unable to shove him off me, though, and part of me wanted to find out why I was backed up against the tree.

“I can’t,” he said, not looking at me. “I can’t.”

“You don’t have to answer; it’s none of my business. I’m sorry,” I said, pain shooting through my shoulders and collarbone where his hands were still firmly pinning me against the tree. The bark was digging into my back.

When his grip softened, I thought he was going to back away and leave me standing. Instead they quickly fell to my sides, and his chest was now pinning me against the tree. William only hesitated momentarily before he leaned forward and slammed his lips against mine. I could feel his scruffy beard grate against mine. At first I was too shocked, too inexperienced myself to kiss him back, until it felt like he was going to pull away. Reaching up I grabbed hold of his arms, to hold him in place as I started moving my lips.

I heard him moan against me before he abruptly broke the kiss and took a couple of steps back.

“I can’t,” he said, kicking up leaves as he kicked the ground. He turned his back to me, pacing a few steps before turning back around. His hand went to the back of his head, and he began rubbing his neck, looking at me. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that; it’s wrong.”

“Don’t tell me what we just did is wrong,” I said, limping as I walked out of the blackberry bush. “I’m finally just starting to think that it isn’t.”

“I can’t ever think that it’s not,” he countered, crossing his arms over his chest like he was fighting against a chilly morning even though we were both sweating from the humidity in the air.

I didn’t know how to respond. When I went to reach out for him, he backed away and bolted from the woods. I watched him disappear through the tall grass. He didn’t stop running until he was at the barn where we slept.

After picking all of the thorns out of my foot, I walked back to the barn to grab my shoes, cursing myself for not taking the time to put them on earlier. A lot of the soreness had worked out of my body, though, and what was left I knew wouldn’t get better until a couple days had passed.

When I stepped back outside, I saw Nikki and Tess walking up the gravel road, leaning on one another and looking around. Most everyone was rushing around doing their morning chores. Both girls were at least dressed in a lot more clothes. When Tessa saw me, she elbowed Nikki, and they gingerly quickened their pace.

“There you are,” Tessa said as we huddled by the barn hoping to keep out of the way. I looked past her for any sign of William, but I hadn’t seen him.

“Took us forever to figure out the lock,” Nikki said, “I thought they had locked us in.”

“Shh,” Tessa hissed, looking around. “When do you think the rental car will show up?”

“Probably not until later this afternoon,” I said, shrugging my shoulders, wincing when that hurt.

“Where did you sleep?” Tessa asked, examining me closer. Now that it was daylight and I could see them better, I frowned, seeing the bruises. Nikki’s bottom lip was swollen and scabbed over. It also looked like she’d got a black eye, and both of them were covered in cuts and bruises.

“Up there in the loft,” I said, pointing up towards the window we were standing under.

“That must have sucked,” Nikki said, and I looked past them to see Ruth carrying a small basket towards us. I cleared my throat, and Nikki and Tessa turned around as she approached. She didn’t smile at first, but then only managed a tight half smile when she did. She wasn’t as used to dealing with outsiders as her husband or William seemed to be.

“Here are some biscuits,” she said, holding out her basket. “Mary is bringing some milk, and William will bring your things down from the loft. It would be better for you three to wait for your car down by the shop.”

“Thank you,” I said, holding out my hand to accept the basket. After I had it in my grasp, she turned and walked back towards the house, not looking back at us to see if we listened to her.

In the basket there was enough for us to have two biscuits each, and I shrugged and led the girls back down the gravel road to the shop. Looking up, I saw that it said, “Roofing Materials and Installation,” in black block letters across the front of it. Out front, William’s father had unlocked the doors and put a block in front of it to hold it open to let a breeze in. He also switched the sign hanging on it from ‘closed’ to ‘open.’

“I see that you three survived the night,” he said when he noticed us. “I apologize for not introducing myself last night, my name is Samuel.

“Do you need any help with the barn?” I asked, “I promised your son that I would help until the rental car came.”

“No,” he answered, “I’d rather you just stay out of the way so we can all get back to normal around here.”

“Okay,” I said, sighing as he smiled and excused himself to get back to work.

“Let’s go sit in the shade,” I said, pointing out a large tree at the edge of the gravel parking lot.

“They actually seemed nicer last night,” Tessa whispered as we made our way to the tree.

After settling under it, we ate the biscuits. At first Nikki looked like she was going to ignore them, but not having anything to eat for a long time, she finally broke down and tried one. They made me miss home, Mom could make the best homemade biscuits, and these reminded me of them.

We watched as children packed our things out of the shop and stacked them under the tree, all of them too bashful to speak or look at us for any length of time. I felt bad not offering to help, but I thought if I did it would just scare them.

“This sucks ass,” Nikki said, leaning against my shoulder. I wanted to shrug her off me, but didn’t feel like arguing with her. I had been waiting for William to bring down my bags. He hadn’t yet, and I wondered if he would make someone else do it.

“Are you okay, Wes?” Tessa asked from the other side of me. She was leaning against the tree with her eyes closed. “You’re not talking much.”

“Sore,” I lied, nudging her with my elbow. “Worried about what Mom is gonna say when we get home.”

“I bet she didn’t sleep last night at all,” Tessa said, and I heard the tears in her voice. I looked over to see her wiping them away with her hands.

“It will be okay, Tess,” I said, reaching over and pulling her against my side. She buried her head into my shoulder, still crying.

“My poor car,” Nikki said, and I felt her begin to sob, so I put my arm around her, leaning my head back against the tree.

“It won’t do either of you any good to be crying now,” I said. “Please try not to cry.”

“I can’t help it,” Tessa said, “I’ve not had any sleep, I feel so awful, and we’ve done so much to these people, and then there’s Mom and Dad.”

“And my car,” Nikki added, and I sighed looking straight ahead, towards the gravel road. My stomach tensed when I saw William carrying all three of my bags towards us. He was dressed in a clean pair of overalls and a white button shirt. He walked as quickly as he could, his face pointed towards the ground, not really looking at anyone as they rushed around him doing their chores. Mary must have forgotten about the milk or was told to forget about us and get to work.

“Here come my bags,” I said, wanting to talk to him, but knowing it wouldn’t be a good time or place to do so under the shade tree.

When he stepped under the shade of the large tree, he gently lined up my three bags where the younger children had put the girls’ things. Both Tessa and Nikki were still quietly sobbing against me, and when he noticed them, he cocked an eyebrow and hesitated before leaving.

“What’s the matter with them?” he asked, half turned to leave.

“I think the shock finally wore off enough for them to cry about it,” I answered, not following his eyes to look at them.

“Oh, alright,” he said, and I shrugged my shoulders, gently pushing them both away so I could stand.

“You two cry with one another,” I said, and Tessa scooted closer to Nikki, their sobs turning more into quiet snuffling.

“I have to get to work; the tow truck should be here,” he said, stepping back out into the overcast sky.

“Wait a minute,” I said, following him. When we were away from the girls and far enough away from the shop for people to hear us, he led me to a small alley between the shop and the warehouse where all of the roofing supplies were housed. There were people in there sorting through the materials, making too much noise to overhear anything going on outside the block walls.

“What do you want?” he asked, crossing his arms.

“I’m sorry about earlier,” I said, “I shouldn’t have…”

“What?” he asked, his voice getting lower. “Kissed me back, I think I’m the one that did something wrong, sinful, dangerous.”

“Don’t beat yourself up,” I said, shaking my head. “It won’t do you any good to.”

“I need to,” he said, “it’s the only way I can keep myself from thinking about it. I was just lonely, and when I figured you out, I couldn’t stand it. It can’t happen again.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, and he glared at me.

“Stop apologizing; you’ve been doing it for two days now,” he said, reaching up and scratching the back of his head. “I’m not going to be here long, I can’t stand it here, I’ll go crazy now that I know what it feels like.”

“Can’t you see what it is like out there and then come back?” I asked, and he shook his head.

“No, not me,” he countered, “I’ll help rebuild the barn, then I’ll get a ride with a friend that left a couple years ago.”

“Where will you go?” I asked, and then I heard both girls squeal, and I darted around the building to see a familiar car pulling into the gravel driveway.

“I was thinking Iowa isn’t so different,” he said, offering me a crooked smile. “Might ease me into life outside of all this.”

“Might,” I said, and I looked past him to see Tessa looking around for me as Nikki’s dad got out of the driver’s side. Then the passenger door opened, and our dad stepped out of it, looking around for me as well.

“Better go,” he said, nodding towards the minivan.

“If you make it to Iowa, how will I know?” I asked, and he smiled.

“I don’t think I will ever get out of here, not really,” he answered, and I saw the sadness in his blue eyes, and I hated that I now knew him well enough to see it.

“Just look up Robert and Lucy Brantley in the phonebook in a little town called Shelton,” I said. “Promise?”

“Promise,” he said, and I turned and walked towards the minivan, hoping to see him again someday.