Clueless Camping - 12. Confrontation and control

When Chris, Evan and I got to the airport, Mom and Kristin’s flight had landed ten minutes earlier, but there were still five minutes until baggage arrival started. We took up positions in the same place where Jacob and I had waited for Evan and Chris, and this time my twin was the jittery one. I saw Chris put a calming hand on the back of Evan’s neck, which lessened the fierce grip he had on my hand. As the minutes went by I noticed Chris developing a tense cast to his shoulders and face.

Pulling Evan with me, so that he ended up in Chris’ arms, I sidled around to my future brother-in-law’s other side and tapped his shoulder. He tilted his head towards me even as he gave Evan a fierce hug.

“Mom’s gonna love you, Chris.” I couldn’t believe I was reassuring this older, more confident, clever guy, but he seemed to appreciate it.

“Yeah?” He smiled at me, and some of the tension left his shoulders.

“Oh, definitely. She’ll take one look at the way you protect Evan, and approve. Then she’ll watch how you tolerate and handle my excitable, hot-headed, talkative, overeager twin, and she’ll love you forever.”

“Thanks, Russell.” Chris smirked at Evan who did his adorable pout at the both of us.

“I’m NOT hot-headed! I keep my temper under control even in the face of extreme provocation.”

“You’ll notice he doesn’t deny the other three epithets,” I observed, and Chris chuckled.

Before Evan could come up with a suitable retort, I saw Kristin and our mother exit the doors from the arrival hall.

“Mom, Mom!” I took off with a shout, but managed to contain myself until they had gotten past the milling crowd of passengers and people waiting. As soon as she let go of her suitcase and handbag I was in her arms, hugging her fiercely. I felt Mom’s tears on the side of my neck as she clutched me just as hard.

“Oh my sweet boy, I’m so glad you’re well. Let me look at you.” She pulled back and used one hand to wipe her wet cheeks, while staring at my face. I couldn’t help noticing Mom looked older, tired and less calm than she normally did, and somehow I didn’t think it was simply due to jetlag and no make-up. A small voice of guilt whispered that it was all my fault, but I managed to ignore it. Mom’s happy smile helped.

“Oh Russell, you’re looking wonderfully fit and cheerful. Being in Denmark has transformed you once more. I can’t wait to see Jacob and thank him for everything he’s done for you. And I’m proud of you for dealing so well with everything that’s happened.”

I blushed and wanted to sink into the ground, but my mom saved me by switching her gaze to Evan and Chris. She instinctively knew how much I hated being the focus of praise and attention.

“And I’m just as eager to meet the man who tamed my wild son. He must be made of stern stuff.”

“Aaaaw Mom,” Evan wailed indignantly, while Chris and my sister burst out laughing. Kristin had obviously become introduced to our future brother-in-law while Mom and I greeted each other. I moved to her side and Kristin immediately hugged me.

“Russell, you bad boy. Taking off and disappearing for weeks and coming back with a hunky boyfriend. But I guess twins do have a tendency to run parallel lives.” She rumpled my hair the way she always did to us, and kissed my cheek.

“Seriously, Russ. I’m glad you and Evan are back on the twin track, and that you’ve both found great guys to be with.” I wondered how she knew Evan and I were aligned once more, but decided to change the subject.

“What about you, Sis? Any guys in your life?” When she shook her head, I grinned. “Christian will be delighted to hear that.”

“Christian?” She looked puzzled, but then it dawned on her. “Oh no, not Jacob’s best friend! Please tell me he’s not going to be around.”

“Sorry Sis, but he’s not only going to be at the engagement party, we’re also meeting him tomorrow night. Jacob says he’s really anxious to see you again.”

“I’m gonna kill him!” I wasn’t sure whether she meant Jacob or Christian, but I turned all my attention to Mom talking with Evan and Chris. She’d been hugging my twin who babbled excitedly in her ear, until she finally cut him off.

“Yes, yes, Evan, I agree. Now will you please introduce me to your man?”

“Oh, right, ummm… Mom, please meet Chris Aldercroft. Chris, this is my mother, Isabella.”

“Pleased to meet you Mrs.—” Chris began, but Mom waved her hand in protest.

“No, no, you must call me Isabella, please, or Isa the way my other future son-in-law does.”

“Thank you, Isa. I’m delighted to finally meet the ladies of the family. I hope Evan and I will have the pleasure of your company frequently from now on.” Chris took a step forward and bent his head to kiss Mom’s cheek, and I wasn’t surprised to see her hug him. He was clearly prepared for this too and gently embraced her. I looked at the clock at the other end of the terminal and realized Jens would be at the parking lot in less than fifteen minutes.

“We should go outside soon, so we’re ready to be picked up. Mom, Kristin, you’re going with Jacob’s dad, and we’ll follow in a taxi. Ehm Chris, you may have to pay, because I don’t have a credit card.”

“Yes, you do, Russell, let me get it out, and you can sign it. I’ve got the code here too.” Mom picked up her handbag and started rummaging in it.

“No problem, Isa, let me deal with the cab fare. You can sort matters out later on.” Chris grabbed the handle of Mom’s suitcase and gave Evan a stern glance. My twin immediately took hold of Kristin’s roller bag and said ‘Lead the way’ to me.

Jens pulled in ten minutes after we arrived at the pick-up parking, and we bundled Kristin, Mom and their suitcases into his car. He gave me a piece of paper with their address, saving me the trouble of trying to pronounce it to the cab driver. We said ‘So long’, crossed to the other side of the terminal and got into a taxi. Chris took the front passenger seat and Evan and I jumped in the back. I’d given Chris the note with the address and he showed it to the cabbie, who nodded but didn’t look too pleased.

To my surprise it he took a coastal route along the east side of the airport and we had a great view of the blue waters of Øresund and the arriving airplanes as we drove. There was almost no traffic and I’m not sure he stayed below the speed limit. We actually managed to arrive before Jens in spite of leaving a bit later. Chris paid and tipped the driver, which made him grin and exclaim “Tusind tak, hr.” I suppose the driver's initial disappointment at a short fare jaunt explained his surliness, but Chris' generosity had made it all better.

As we turned to walk into the front garden, I saw Jens’ car turn the corner from the opposite direction. Evan grinned and waved cheekily. I heard a car door slam behind me, but didn’t think anything of it until a familiar disapproving voice reached my ears.

“I assume you’re the devil leading my eldest son astray.” Shit!

Evan and I turned and there was Father standing next to a car with tinted windows. I hadn’t noticed it in the driveway belonging to Jens and Benedicte’s neighbor. He was staring at Chris, who simply stared back, his profile nothing but a calm mask.

I grabbed Evan’s hand and dragged him backwards, one step at a time. I could feel him beginning to shake, but whether it was from rage or fear, I wasn’t sure. A mixture, perhaps? Suddenly Jens’ car pulled up next to us; my mom and Kristin got out, already exclaiming about how we’d gotten there before them. They couldn’t see Father, since he was behind the hedge, but Kristin quickly noticed something was wrong and hurried towards us. At the same time, I heard Benedicte’s voice.

“Welcome, all of you…” she stopped at the end of the garden path right next to me, and I instinctively reached out and grabbed her hand. One look at my ashen face was more than enough for her to shift from smiling to frowning, but at the same time Father moved out on the sidewalk and became visible to everyone.

“Hello, Henry,” Benedicte said. Her voice was full of arctic ice. “Have you come to apologize to your family?”

“Dad,” Kristin was almost pleading with Father, “please don’t spoil everything by making a scene.” I almost laughed at the idea; Father would never do that in public, he cared way too much about his image. Although I guess this quiet suburban road had few eyes and ears to watch and hear.

He ignored both of them and spoke to Mom. “Isabella, my dear, it’s good to see you again. How are you?”

“I’m fine, thank you, Henry.” Her voice was polite, but nothing more. Fuck, they really were not on good terms, I’d never seen them greet each other without a kiss. Father might not exhibit much affection towards his children, but he never hesitated to show his love for Mom.

“I’d like to ask you to go for a walk down to the beach, so we can talk in private. Would you do this for me, please?”

It was strange how I immediately recognized his strategy; maybe I had learned more than I thought from all those evening meals where Father would hold forth on his successful dealings with business associates and colleagues. He was trying to catch Mom at a time when she was tired, and separate her from her support base. Divide and conquer – or was it divide and rule? And he did not demand, but asked gently, lovingly, almost pleadingly. Because this was so different from his usual demeanor, it was all the more effective. I held my breath waiting for Mom to answer. I think everyone else did too.

“Henry, all I want to hear you say is that you’ve come to your senses, and you’re ready to accept your sons for the men they are, as well as their partners. Whatever you have to say, it should be said in front of Evan and Russell and their future husbands.”

Father morphed back to the disapproving and haughty stance I knew all too well. “And are you aware that this man you hugged and kissed in the airport has for several years been a prominent member of Chicago’s sadomasochist scene? Do you really approve of such a person as the lover of your barely legal son?”

Fuck, how did…oh…his PA must have been at the terminal, and as soon as Jens picked up Mom and Kristin, he had alerted Father who was lurking in this neighborhood. Why hadn’t I kept an eye out for the guy? I was the only one who knew what he looked like…Not that I could recall him distinctly. And he could have been disguised…I dismissed the matter and focused on the scene in front of me.

Mom had winced a tiny bit at the mention of S&M, enough for Father’s tone to get slightly triumphant at his second question. Knowing your sons were having sex might be OK, but I guess few moms wanted to be privy to any of the kinky stuff.

“If you know that, you also know I didn’t renew my club membership after I started to date Evan.” Chris might have been speaking to Father, but his eyes were on Evan, and they clearly begged him to stay quiet. I reinforced this entreaty by squeezing my twin’s hand.

“Well, you didn’t need it, did you?” our father sneered. “You had your own submissive all handy and eager at home.” He turned back to Mom.

“Isabella, I did not oppose Evan’s notions of being attracted to men, as you seem to think. No, I wanted to get him out of the clutches of this ‘Dom’. A professional Dominator who's ten year older than your boy, and gets turned on by possessing and spanking our son. This control freak has made Evan reject his family and all notions of proper decent behavior.”

I could feel Evan shaking with rage or disgust – or some other emotion, which would surely have erupted into a fit of shouting or worse – but Mom spoke up.

“All I care about as a mother, as a parent…” the rebuke was razor sharp, “…is for my children to be happy and loved. Our sons have found this with Chris and Jacob, and nothing else matters.”

Father looked like he was going to reply, but Mom plowed on. “For years I have watched my boys, particularly Russell, wilt under the cruel expectations and the demands you’ve made, or rather from the lack of love and approval. I’m ashamed it took me so long to figure out what the problem was. But seeing Russell looking happy and healthy after three months away from your oppressive control gave me the final clue. You are the problem, Henry, you and your need to have everyone around you bend to your pretenses and wishes.”

She walked over and stood in front of Evan and me, and we took her hands. “I’m proud of Evan for breaking away, for being strong and courageous, and for finding a man who cares for him, protects him, loves him and needs him, the way spouses should.” Mom wasn’t looking at Father; she was staring right at Chris and finished her speech with a smile in his direction.

“Thank you, Isa. You’re quite right. I need Evan and I love him with all my heart and want to him happy. Forever.” Ignoring Father, Chris walked right up to Evan and kissed him, and it wasn’t a small peck either. No, it was a huge smooch, one of those calculated to make your knees weak and something else hard. Afterwards, he kept Evan encircled with his left arm and held his right hand out to Benedicte.

“Hello, I’m Chris. Nice to meet you. I can see the resemblance to Jacob, so you must be his mom.”

“Welcome Chris, I’m glad to meet you, please come inside. The coffee is ready and I’ve baked chocolate cake. Jens, please organize the luggage. Kristin, you’re looking better than ever, but you and Isa must be exhausted after your long flight.”

Somehow Benedicte managed to herd us all into the garden in the most casual way while ignoring my fuming father as if he were of absolutely no importance. I feared my mom would stay and talk to him, but she linked her arm in mine and made me stroll with her after everyone else.

“I’m proud of you too, Russell, I hope you know that?”

“I understand, Mom. You focused on Evan, in order to make Chris feel better.”

“That’s my clever, considerate boy.”

A few months earlier I would probably have denied being clever, but Jacob’s warnings about not being allowed to put myself down as well as my promise on the matter weren’t forgotten. In addition something else was looming behind me, but Mom forestalled me with an intense whisper, preventing me from looking over my shoulder.

“Ignore him, he is not worth our while right now. He needs to come to his senses and if he doesn’t, well…”

I kept expecting Father to shout or come after us, perhaps grip my arm, but he was much too controlled to make a mistake like that. We heard the car door slam and moments later he drove down the road at a measured pace. I saw the car disappear out of the corner of my eye and sighed in relief. But of course now we would have to deal with the aftermath of the confrontation.

As soon as we entered the house, I heard Evan ranting. “How dare he? He must have had someone investigate you, snooping into… I never want to see that utter bastard again, as long as I live! I’m gonna take out a restraining order against him when we get home, and if he comes within 30 yards of me or Russ, he’ll regret it. Why can’t he leave us alone? I hate him. I…”

Evan’s rage dissolved into sobbing, and we heard Chris soothe him. I let go of Mom to rush into the living room where my twin was clinging to his boyfriend. No one else was present, so I stopped and tried to back out.

“Evan, Russell is here; come on, honey, calm down.” Chris beckoned me with his fingers and eyes, and I joined them. Stroking Evan’s back, I did my best to help.

“Forget about Father. Don’t hate him feel sorry for him. He’s losing his family and he’s desperate. He wants you to react, but Mom is right. Ignoring him is much better. Don’t let him fuck with your mind and your emotions. Let it go, please, En. Think about the wonderful man who loves you; he’s worried about you. I bet Chris doesn’t give a shit about anything Father says or does. All he cares about is making you happy, and you should focus on making your future husband happy too.”

Gradually, Evan calmed down; Chris kept holding him, kissing the top of his head, murmuring words of support to him, backing up what I said. Finally, my twin looked up at his partner.

“Oh Chris, I’m sorry.”

“Never mind, Evan. It’s OK, babe.” Chris gently wiped Evan’s face and kissed him. I stepped away and looked around. Hearing voices from the garden, I walked over to the French doors. Benedicte and Jens were showing Mom and Kristin the flowerbeds and the view, and I saw the table on the terrace was decked out with cakes and other treats. Obviously we were going to be outside, since the weather was nice. Mom must have gone out there via the kitchen.

I walked across the lawn to where Benedicte and Mom were standing, talking. As I approached, Jacob’s mom said, “Do you think Henry will give up now, Isa?”

Mom sighed. “Probably not until the boys are married, but I don’t want them to rush…” My shadow fell between them and she stopped talking. They both turned and smiled at me.

“Russell, how is Evan doing?” Benedicte didn’t beat around the bush.

“Ehm, he’s OK now. I think they’ll be out soon.”

“Good, then let’s go get some coffee and cake. Isa, I’ve baked your favorite – orange chocolate cake.”

“Sounds wonderful; I’ve tried to make it at home, but it’s not the same, somehow.”

We made our way back to the table, collecting Jens and Kristin on the way, and Chris and Evan joined us. Benedicte had made buns and Danish butter cookies as well as two kinds of cake, and soon we were all groaning in the reclining chairs in the garden.

“That was absolutely delicious, Benedicte, but I’ll have to run twice the distance tomorrow to work off all those calories,” Chris told her. He and Evan were holding hands; I think my twin was sort of sugar-doped and mellow from the experience. Comfort-eating had done me good too, but I wished Jacob were here. So far the conversation had neatly avoided the topic of the ambush out front. I’d told everyone about the camping, mainly the tourist stuff of where did we go and what did we see.

“What are the plans for this week anyway?” Kristin asked.

“Jacob will join us for dinner tonight. I know he wants the young people to go out for a meal on Tuesday to celebrate a hopefully successful exam; his best friend Christian will join them. And there’s the party on Saturday of course, but otherwise no plans so far.” Benedicte listed the official itinerary and Kristin rolled her eyes at the mention of Christian.

“Tomorrow I’m going to buy an engagement ring for Chris,” Evan announced proudly. The love in the look he gave Chris burned so fiercely, it made tears appear in Mom’s eyes. In mine too, actually.

“Maybe you’d like to join us for lunch afterwards,” Chris said to Kristin and Mom, and they both nodded.

“Benedicte, you’ll come too, won’t you?” I knew she was off most of this week, even though Jens had to work.

“Of course, Russell.” Her blue eyes reminded me of Jacob when she smiled, happy, caring and proud of me. My future mother-in-law was awesome.

Chris tried to apologize for not including her at first, but she laughed and engaged him and Mom in a discussion of where to go. Chris wanted to try smørrebrød, and they finally settled on Ida Davidsen, even if Benedicte said it was too touristy to be cool. Expensive too, but Chris trumped that criticism.

“I’m taking my future husband and in-laws out for lunch, and you’re expecting me to care about the cost?”

Mom had been studying him with a thoughtful expression. “Chris, are you by any chance related to Vincent Aldercroft?”

“Yes, he’s my grandfather, do you know him?”

“I met him years ago during one of the bank’s annual dinners for major shareholders and business associates. I knew you reminded me of someone, but at first I couldn’t think who. And it only clicked because I’ve seen his name and a picture of him in the paper recently. Something about retiring from several Board of Directors positions at age of seventy.”

“Yes, he celebrated his birthday last autumn.”

“You look very much like him, or at least the younger version I met.”

Chris laughed, “You’re not the first person to say this. In fact when you look at photos of him from fifty years ago, it could be me, apart from the out-of-date fashions.”

Mom hesitated, but Chris gave her a nod as if he knew what she wanted to ask. “I assume you’re out to your family?” He nodded again. “And they’ve met Evan?”

“My parents and sisters have, and they like him. They have no problems with me being gay, if that’s what you want to know. I’ve been out to them since I was eighteen.”

“And your grandparents?”

“They have a harder time accepting it, particularly Grandpa Aldercroft. Which is why I haven’t seen him since the family celebration at his birthday, and I haven’t introduced Evan to him.”

“Oh.” Mom’s sigh of disappointment was obvious.

“However, I have the feeling his disapproval might diminish the moment Evan and I put a ring on each other’s fingers. It’s one of the reasons I’m not opposing my mom’s desire for a big wedding. I’m the oldest grandchild on both sides and will probably be the first to get married, and my grandmothers would not be pleased if their husbands didn’t escort them. To them that would be a bad breach of etiquette, and they'd sooner be seen at a same-sex marriage ceremony than at any wedding without their spouses in tow.”

“Interesting, I shall have to tell Henry this. He expressed his respect and admiration for your grandfather when we saw the article.”

“Mom, I don’t want Father at our wedding if he’s only doing it to preserve his fucking image.”

“Evan—” Mom began, but he stood up and shouted “NO.” I winced, but I knew my twin had to express his fury.

“I don’t care whether he accepts me or not, but he has insulted Chris, and I’ll never forgive him for that.” Evan took a deep breath. “And another thing: he spied on me, and he investigated Chris – and he did it before I came out to him!”

“You don’t know—”

“Yes I do! Suddenly it’s all clear. That’s why he insisted on talking to me that night. I couldn’t understand why he kept going on about needing to find myself a proper girl, and the importance of leading an impeccable life if I wanted a successful career in law. He even tried to persuade me to transfer to a local law school.”

“What?” Mom was obviously surprised at the last revelation.

“Yeah, he told me Russell needed me, and I should stop being so selfish and come back home. ‘Your twin is not doing well, Evan. You should give duty to your family higher priority than your own egocentric wants.’ Fucking bastard. He just wanted to get me away from Chris.” Evan had Father’s pompous and admonishing tone down flat, and Mom’s lips went tight in a way which didn’t bode well for him. Our father that is, although I knew she disapproved strongly of the F-word too.

“Mom, I’m sure Evan is right,” my sister said. “I think Dad also had a PI check up on me after I moved to New York. But since I didn’t have any secrets and didn’t date anyone ‘inappropriate,’ it never caused a problem. Well, other than I’ve lost a lot of respect for him.” Kristin’s calm statement upset our mom even more, and Benedicte moved her chair closer so she could put her arm around Mom.

“Isa, Henry obviously has major problems with letting his children take control of their own lives. This is not your fault, and none of us ever realized before now. I’m sure his siblings and his colleagues would be quite surprised too. He’s hidden the extent of his obsession well, or perhaps he suppressed it better in the past.”

“That’s kind of you, Dicte, but I think Henry was always this bad; we simply never challenged his control of the family before Evan came out. Oh, I suppose you did a bit, Kristin, when you left home, but like you said, you did what he expected and wanted.”

Jens suddenly spoke up. “Perhaps another reason is that Henry doesn’t see women as an equal challenge to his authority. He’s more protective and caring to the females in his life, rather than confrontational.”

“Det svage køn, mener du?” Benedicte snorted and translated her Danish phrase. “The weaker sex – or is that gender? Anyway, I think Jens might be right. But let’s not waste any more time on psychoanalyzing Henry, he needs a shrink to help him with his issues.”

“Evan and I could probably benefit from professional help too.” The words plopped out of my mouth before I had time to reconsider. A stunned silence followed and I wanted to sink into the ground.

“Why…Why do you think you need that, Russell?” Mom asked after a long awkward pause. I snuck a glance at Evan who seemed more worried than pissed, but that might change. Oh well, I had to reply.

“Jacob and I met this girl on Læsø, a student of psychology. I talked to her about hating Father for hurting us. She said the worst thing was the damage we might suffer if we can’t deal with our feelings.” I looked straight at Evan as I said this and he flinched. “She told me forgiving might take a lot of therapy, and ‘if the other party shows no remorse, maybe all you can forgive and stop hating is yourself.’ I think she’s right. It’s better to feel sorry for him than to hate him, even if we never see him again.”

The stubborn set of Evan’s mouth showed me he wasn’t convinced. But Chris was nodding.

“Listen to Russell, babe. Your twin has a good point. Anger is fine, but prolonged hate can be a nasty thing to deal with. What’s the use? He’s lost and you have won.”

He gestured at me, Kristin and Mom, “They all chose you over him. You’re not the one to break the family apart. In fact, when all the dust settles, you’ll either have a better balance with your dad or he’ll be the one without a family.” Mom’s emphatic nod put the seal of approval on Chris’ words, and I saw some of the tension leave Evan. I hadn’t realized he felt responsible for the way things had developed after he had stormed out, and I think Mom was surprised too.

“Darling Evan, you cannot change the past and none of it is your fault. I made the choice to send Russell to Denmark, and I’m glad to say it has turned out to be an even better idea than I hoped. I’m very sorry this separation has been so hard on you; I should have contacted you and explained. Can you forgive me?”

She held out her arms to us and we nearly tumbled over each other to hug her. It was strange to feel protective of my twin, but it is a good feeling too. Evan needs me, I’m his anchor and without me he’s all-adrift. In return he pulls me out of myself, out of sadness and depression and self-hate. Our bond is equal, balanced, and mutually supportive. I never saw it like this before, but I do now. I finally feel I deserve Evan’s love and caring, and that I give as much in return. I’m even starting to feel worthy of Jacob’s love.

Jacob… I missed him so intensely it was like a physical ache in my guts. How could it get so bad after only a few hours’ separation? Oh wait, the emotional upheaval might account for my need to feel Jacob’s arms around me. But now that I thought about it, I realized that even if Jacob weren’t here physically, his positive influence stayed with me. In fact, he was the one to plant the seed of understanding and nurture it for weeks, listening to me talking about Evan and often pointing out how Evan asked my opinion or wanted me to stay close. Like the time he reminded me of going to Tivoli and Bakken…

***

“Do you remember when we went to Bakken?” We had been talking in the tent for an hour or more after Jacob’s breakdown over me getting TBE. He was trying to help me recall some of the good parts of my previous visit five years ago.

“Vaguely.”

“Your mum wanted to take you to Tivoli as the most traditional Danish fun fair park, but I recommended Bakken as better for teenagers.”

Vague memories drifted up from the murky depths. “We ended up going to both places, didn’t we?”

“Yes. Evan wanted to try the wilder rides at Bakken, so my mother suggested he go with me and Kristin and you could go with your mum and her to Tivoli.”

“But that’s not what happened.” I distinctly recalled clutching Evan on the mountain rollercoaster at Tivoli as well as on the traditional one at Bakken, and both of us yelling in a mixture of fright and delight.

“No, Evan insisted on going to Tivoli with you.” Jacob grinned at me in the soft beam from the flashlight, and I smiled back and felt my heart warm at the thought of Evan refusing to abandon me.

“He always did things like that for me; he knew I wouldn’t enjoy myself without him.”

“Maybe, but he enjoyed Tivoli too, and he kept telling you he was glad you made that choice. He liked the history and traditions, and some of the rides were plenty wild for him. You went together on every single one, except the Golden Tower. You refused to go up there, and Evan did that one with me, but he wasn’t happy about it. ”

“And then he probably persuaded me to go to Bakken.”

“Actually, you suggested it and persuaded your mum.”

“I did?” I had no recollection of this.

“Yes, she said to my mum it was one of the few times during the whole holiday you expressed a strong desire for doing a particular thing. You pointed out that it was only fair for Evan to get his wish fulfilled too, and for you to go with him. Since I had offered to take all my cousins to Bakken, and Kristin wanted to go too, we spent a whole day there before leaving for Bornholm.”

“Yeah, and it was so much fun, and I felt silly for insisting on Tivoli.”

“Evan thought it was clever of you.”

“Huh?”

“He said he thought it was on purpose. He knew your mum would defer to your wishes, and she was pleased with him for insisting on going with you to Tivoli. If he had asked to go to Bakken as well, she might have said no, but she was delighted you finally begged for a treat and wanted to try something on your own. Evan said that way you got to try both places, and going to Tivoli first and Bakken afterwards was the best choice. He admired you for making it happen.”

“Oh…” I’d never thought about it like that.

“Later he told me, he wouldn’t have dared half the rides on his own, but you seemed to assume he was fearless and wanted to go on all of them. You clearly expected him to protect you and make you enjoy the rides, so that’s what he did. Luckily, he found out he liked most of them, and he was proud of you for going with him again and again, even after one of them almost made you puke. I thought you had a lot of guts too.”

“But I was petrified most of the time. I only did it for Evan.”

“Russell, doing things when you’re scared, takes a lot more courage.”

***

At the time, I had shrugged and changed the subject, but now I realized those kinds of stories and discussions had gradually made me see Evan and myself in a new light. I love Jacob for many reasons, but opening my eyes and giving me the chance to re-forge my twin bond in a stronger and better way than ever is one of the most important things he’s done for me. I have the feeling Evan will agree.

I can't wait to show Jacob how appreciative I truly am.

I realize this is a shorter chapter than normal. I apologize, but I got persuaded to spend some time on my prompt story.   Thanks to AC and Kitt for their help.
I’d like to dedicate this chapter to Kitt (and all the other caring and protective Moms on GA).