Holding Back - 16. Chapter 16

Peter wakes up in Wade’s arms and smiles to himself. The last time Wade slept over he was gone before Peter woke up, but now the ex-merc has his chest and stomach pressed up against Peter’s back, his slow breathing tickling the back of Peter’s neck. Peter glances at the alarm clock on the night stand. It’s only six thirty, and his first lecture doesn’t start until ten today. He is at first surprised that he’s even awake, but then he realises that they actually went to bed fairly early last night, exhausted from their . . . activity.

Since it’s so early, Peter wants most of all to just go back to sleep, but he does kind of need to pee. He shifts, trying to remove himself from Wade’s embrace without waking him, but upon his movement, Wade pulls him tighter to his chest and Peter discovers morning wood pressing quite insistently against his asscheek.

‘Mm,’ Wade protests sleepily. ‘Warm . . . Stay here.’

Peter chuckles softly and caresses Wade’s arm with his fingertips. ‘I kind of need a piss, though.’

‘So do I, but it’s not like I’m gonna be able to with this hard-on anyway.’ Wade slips his hand slowly down Peter’s stomach. ‘In the spirit of solidarity, I think it’s only fair that you help me out, here. It’s basically your fault that I’m like this, anyway. Wiggling your ass against me all night.’ He finds what he’s looking for and gives Peter’s half hard cock a few languid strokes. Peter hisses.

‘That’s just cruel,’ he mumbles.

‘No it’s not,’ Wade replies. ‘Besides, coming when you need to pee can be pretty intense.’

Peter rolls his eyes and then rolls over onto his back. He looks up into Wade’s soft brown eyes, and Wade bends his neck to kiss him lazily and sloppily. Morning breath and all, the kiss makes Peter feel warm in all the right places. Then Wade rolls on top of him and grabs both of their dicks in one large hand. Peter throws his head back and moans.

It doesn’t take long. The point isn’t to make it last, after all. Wade comes first with a gasp and a moan, and Peter follows seconds later with a shudder. Wade rests his forehead on Peter’s, and they just lie there for a few moments, coming down. When Wade finally flops over onto his back with a satisfied sigh, Peter starts getting up.

‘I said it first, so you’ll have to wait.’

‘We could go together. We could cross the streams!’ Wade suggests, grinning widely.

Peter laughs and shakes his head. ‘Sounds potentially messy. I think I’ll take a rain check on that.’

‘Suit yourself,’ says Wade, crossing his arms behind his head. ‘I can hold it.’

Peter goes to do his business, and when he gets out of the bathroom again he finds Wade standing stark naked in his kitchen, peering into his fridge.

‘You want pancakes, baby boy?’ he asks. ‘Man, I haven’t made breakfast in ages. My kitchen is not safe to cook in . . . It’s seriously roach city.’

Peter smiles. ‘Sure.’

Wade makes excellent pancakes, as it turns out. It’s nice to sit down and eat breakfast for a change. Most mornings Peter falls out of bed five minutes before he has to leave home, so he doesn’t get to have breakfast very often. He tells Wade this.

‘Aww! I’ll come make you pancakes every morning so you don’t have to go to school hungry, snookums! I’ll even get some top grade Canadian maple syrup for next time.’ Wade grins. Peter smiles around a bite of pancake.

‘Well,’ says Wade when they’ve finished eating and are clearing away the dishes, ‘I guess I should fuck off soon, so you can get ready for school, huh?’

Peter finishes drying a plate and puts it in the cupboard, shrugging one shoulder. ‘Well, I mean, you can hang out here if you want, I don’t mind.’

Wade giggles. Actually giggles, like a twelve-year-old girl. ‘You mean I could be like your little wifey and clean your apartment and have dinner on the table when you get home?’

Peter feels himself blush. ‘I didn’t really mean—’

‘That would be so awesome, Petey-pie!’ Wade throws him a huge grin. ‘I should really head home, though. I mean, I’ve got shit that needs doing. Gun maintenance, suit repair, online stalking of one Mr. Ryan Reynolds . . .’

Peter shakes his head and smiles, turning his back on Wade to put away the last plate. Arms encircle him from behind and pull him into a tight embrace, skin against skin. Peter's in pyjama pants. Wade's wearing his jeans and not much else yet.

‘See you tonight?’ Wade murmurs in his ear. ‘For patrol and then maybe a little R&R after?’

Peter turns around and kisses him on the lips. ‘Definitely.’ He strokes Wade’s upper arms, feeling the play of muscles under his palms as Wade tightens his fists in Peter’s shirt. ‘You know, I was really nervous about last night.’

‘Really? You didn’t seem like it, not even a little.’

‘Well, once we got started it didn’t seem like there was much point being nervous anymore. I mean, you seemed to like it.’

Wade chuckles and brushes his lips against Peter’s neck. ‘You bet your sweet little ass I did.’

‘I guess mostly I was worried that you’d find me boring.’

Wade pulls back a bit and searches his face. ‘Why would I find you boring?’

Peter laughs softly. ‘Because I’m almost painfully vanilla? And you somehow strike me as, well, not.’

Wade seems to consider this for a moment. He smooths back Peter’s hair absentmindedly and chews his lip. ‘It’s true that I’ve got a kink list a mile long,’ he admits at last. ‘And yeah, there’s a lot of that stuff that I’d like to try out with you some time, if you’re up for it. But Petey,’ and here he looks straight into Peter’s eyes, ‘that shit, it’s just icing, you know? Actually, scratch that, it’s not even icing, it’s just decoration. Not even the spun sugar kind, I’m talking little plastic cake decorations that you can’t even eat. And you’re the cake. Right now, when we’re in bed together, you’re my main kink.’

A brief silence follows, during which Peter realises that this may be the closest Wade has ever come to a declaration of love when there’s any chance at all that his feelings may be returned. He does the only thing he can think of, and captures Wade’s mouth in a deep and lasting kiss.

‘Likewise,’ he murmurs when they finally break apart. With great regret he releases Wade and takes a step back towards the kitchen counter. There is nothing he’d rather do than skip all his classes today and take Wade straight back to bed, but these lectures are important. ‘I should go get ready.’

Wade nods. ‘Yeah. I’ll get out of your hair. See you tonight, baby boy!’

* * *

It’s been a long time, a really long time, since anyone has looked at Wade, at his bare skin, without showing disgust. The scars and sores and scabs usually outright scare people away. His appearance has been insulted, laughed at, and has even caused a couple of people to vomit. Nobody has looked at Wade, really looked at him, and seen just another human being since . . . Well, since before Weapon X. Before the cancer.

That’s what makes Peter so remarkable. That he looks at Wade and sees just Wade. He doesn’t seem to mind or care about the way he looks. He doesn’t draw away. Doesn’t recoil in disgust. He touches Wade’s skin, on purpose, and can still get it up. That alone is incredible.

Hey, remember that poor rent boy in Vegas? He was so freaked out when we took off our pants he couldn’t go through with it.

Yeah, but we paid him anyway. Wasn’t his fault. Natural reaction, really.

It’s why it’s so hard to believe Peter sometimes. Because how can it be true? How can anyone look at Wade and not care how ugly he is? Wade has no illusions about how he looks. The world won’t let him. He knows he’s hideous. He’s not ashamed of it, exactly. It is what it is. But he doesn’t like it when people stare too much, and he doesn’t like scaring them.

That’s a lie. We love scaring people! Just not necessarily all the time.

We should be dating Daredevil instead. That would make this whole thing not an issue as he can’t see anyway. It would be great!

Wade sighs and unlocks the door to his building.

‘Good morning, Mr. Wilson!’ a cheery voice greets him. It’s Mrs. Rodriguez from two doors down. She smiles brightly at him. She’s got her son in tow, a tiny little thing no more than three.

Wade pulls his hood forward, making sure his face is in shadow and returns the smile. He doesn’t want to scare the kid. He’s shy.

‘Morning, Mrs. Rodriguez. Morning, Max!’

Max looks up at him with large brown eyes, and then he grins widely. ‘We’re going to the park!’ So, less shy today, then.

‘That’s awesome. Do they have swings there? I love the swings! When I was a kid I used to compete with my friend over who could get the swing to go higher. I always won, cause he chickened out.’ Wade has no idea if this is a real memory or not, but he’s not sure it matters.

‘Max likes the slide, don’t you, Max?’ Mrs. Rodriguez smiles fondly at her little boy and ruffles his hair.

‘Matteo does too!’ Max squeaks happily.

‘Matteo’s his friend he plays with at the park,’ Mrs. Rodriguez explains.

It’s weird calling her Mrs. She’s like ten years younger than us.

She’s someone’s mom. That makes her Mrs. Besides, she calls us Mr. Wilson.

‘What about you? Been out for a morning stroll?’ she asks.

Wade shrugs. ‘Spent the night at a friend’s place.’

‘A friend, huh?’ She smiles even more brightly. ‘Good for you! Well, we should get going before too many big kids occupy the slide.’

‘Have fun!’ Wade waves them off and heads off up the stairs.

It’s weird having neighbours who recognise him and talk to him. He did background checks on everyone in the building when he moved in, so he knows who they all are. Mrs. Rodriguez is a nurse, while her husband’s a dock worker. Usually they manage to make the shifts work out so someone can be at home with Max at all times, though sometimes he has to stay with a neighbour for a couple of hours, or Mrs. Rodriguez has to bring him to work, as they can’t afford daycare. They asked Wade once, but he had to explain that his apartment isn’t exactly child friendly. He was touched that they asked, though.

See? It's not just Peter. The Rodriguezes don't care what we look like either.

Yeah, but they don't know the extent of it. They've never seen us without our hood up.

Wade enters his apartment and sits down with his laptop in his blanket fort. It boots up slowly. He may need a new one soon, but he likes this one too much to replace it until he absolutely has to.

Domino has replied to his e-mail.

Wade,

We’ve been able to dig up pretty much exactly what you did on Trever Tate. Whoever he is, he’s kept his nose clean. He’s definitely a member of the AMDL, but it seems he’s neither a shock trooper nor the brains of the operation. He attends protests but has never thrown a brick, and his opinions are radical but not original. He’s a mouthpiece for the cause and not much else.

We’re keeping tabs on him, though, just in case he turns out to be trouble. I’ll keep you posted. We’re also trying to figure out where he got the photo for his opinion piece in the Bugle from. You’ll be the first to know when we do. Until then, you and Spider-Man should pay attention a little extra and make sure no one follows you home. Especially Spidey.

Logan sends his love. And by love I mean he asks me to remind you that he’ll kick your ass into next Tuesday if you fuck this up and get your boy killed. Or yourself for that matter, at least in the way you don’t come back from.

Watch your back.

Domino