Paper Walls - 14. Chapter 14

Jeremy took Callen home after dinner. I would have went, but Jeremy was going to go hang out with Garret and Shawn. I didn’t want to be around anyone. I felt like crap. I really wanted to like Callen and our first kiss was amazing, but it might have been because it was my first kiss with a boy. I don’t care if it’s barely 9pm on a Saturday - I strip down to my boxers and crawl into my bed under the covers.

“Rye! Rye! RYDER!” someone shakes me and wakes me up.

“What!” I ask, sitting up, confused.

“Dude, Shawn needs to crash in your room for tonight,” Jeremy says.

“What, why?” I ask, wiping the sleep from my eyes.

“He’s drunk. I am kind of drunk as well,” Jeremy giggles.

“Coach is going to kill both of y’all!” I say.

“I know, which is why I need to get him to your bed!” Jeremy hisses.

I get up and see Shawn leaning against the door. “Fine,” I say.

“You got this, I am gonna hit the bed,” Jeremy says, walking out and closing the door behind him.

“I’m not sleeping on the floor, so we can share my bed, or you can sleep on the floor,” I tell Shawn.

He laughs, “Not like you are big. I don’t mind sharing.”

“Okay, um…yeah.”

I watch as he takes off his shirt and fumbles with his belt buckle, and shucks off his jeans. He stretches and rubs his stomach, and I can see his six pack, and butterflies erupt in my stomach. “I’m not sleeping against the wall, so you’re on the inside,” he says.

I move to the inside of the bed, and face the wall. It’s a better idea not to watch him, ‘cause if I do, I will for sure get hard. I feel the bed dip as he gets in and slips under the covers. I move towards the wall a little more. I feel him slip an arm around my bare waist and pull me towards him. I instantly feel the warmth of his chest on my back, and he slips a leg over mine. “I like to cuddle,” he whispers next to my ear.

I relax into him. “I like to be cuddled.”

“You smell good, Ryder, really good.”

I giggle. “What happened, why are you so drunk?”

“Just home life, man, you wouldn’t understand.”

“I’m sorry.”

He tightens his arm around me, and I feel his lips press against my neck. I let out a slight moan, and he kisses up my neck and my cheek. I flip around, and he kisses me on the lips. I can taste the alcohol on his breath. He grabs my face and kisses me harder, and looks at me with a lazy grin. I look back at him, confused.

“Shawn…,” I whisper. “Shawn!”

I hear him lightly snore, and I let out the breath I have been holding… I turn back around and feel him move closer into me. I don’t know how to feel. I don’t know what the fuck just happened……he just kissed me twice! What does this mean and is he feeling an attraction to me? I can’t take this I try to see if he is awake one more time, but he doesn’t even budge. After a few minutes, I start to doze off to the rhythm of his breathing.

I wake up, and sure enough, Shawn is still pressed against me. I feel something pressing into me, and I reach around and grab his rock hard dick. I wouldn’t have been so in shock if it hadn’t slipped out of the hole in his boxers., He feels huge, and it’s warm. I let go and untangle myself from him.

I am rock hard now, and I don’t want him waking up to see me, so I slip on some shorts and grab a pair of socks. “Hey, where are you goin’?” I hear a husky voice ask.

“I was gonna go for a run.”

I see Shawn’s phone light up. “It’s three in the morning. Get back to bed, dude,” he says.

I slip the shorts back off and get back in bed. He pulls me close to him. I try not to budge as much as before, but he’s a lot stronger than me. “What’s wrong?”

“Shawn, what are you doing?” I ask.

“What do you mean?” he says.

“This… you!” I say, turning around and facing him, and he has the stupid grin on his face.

“You’re still drunk….”

“It’s possible.”

“Go to sleep!” I tell him, and take his arm off of me.

I can’t remember when I wake back up, but Shawn isn’t in my bed, which I am more than okay with. I get up and go relieve myself in the bathroom, and slip some shorts on. Down in the kitchen, I see Jeremy and Shawn sitting at the counter with my mom. “Hey sweetie.”

“Hey, Mom,” I say, making my way to the fridge to grab some milk.

“You boys sure are quiet,” Mom says to the other two.

“Just tired, Mrs. K,” Jeremy says.

“What time did you get in? We must have been sleeping already.”

“It was around eleven,” Jeremy says.

“Where’s Dad?” I ask.

“He went up to the field house,” Mom says.

I go sit outside. I don’t want to be in the same room with Shawn right now. I hear the glass door slide shut. “Can we talk?”

“About what, Shawn?”

“Last night.”

“What about it?”

“Can we go to your room and talk about this?” he pleads.

“Fine,” I say, moving past him.

He follows me into my room, and shuts the door, “Look, I know what you’re gonna sa….”

“Look, I don’t know really what I was thinking last night,” he tells me.

“You kissed me!”

“I know I did,” he says.

“Why?”

“I don’t really know,” he says.

“You’re not gay!”

“You’re right, I’m not, but I don’t know. I figured it was what you wanted.”

“What does this even mean?” I ask.

“I don’t know.” He sits on my bed.

“Shawn…you know how much I like you….”

“Let’s talk about this later. Jeremy is going to take me to work. Please, can we talk later?”

“Yeah…”

I watch him walk out the door. I lock the door behind him and lay on my bed. I see my phone light up, but I ignore it. I don’t even know what the fuck is going on. I hear the vibrating of my phone. “Dang it!” I say, and move to get my phone.

“Hey,” says the voice.

“Hey yourself.”

“It’s me - Callen….”

“I know who it is.”

“Look, can we talk?”

“We are talking,” I tell him.

“Ryder, look, I know I wasn’t the best after yesterday. I… I felt rejected, okay? Look, I wanted to go for a run. Are you down? Maybe after, we can talk some more?”

“That sounds good. I didn’t get to go for a run this morning, and yeah, we do need to talk.”

He texts me where to meet him and I run down the stairs.

“Hey Mom, I am going for a run,” I tell her.

“Okay, sweetie, be careful,” she says, looking up from her book.

I meet up with Callen up the road. I look at him, dressed in white basketball shorts and black Nike shoes, with a blue tank top. I can’t help but look him up and down. He looks really good. I see he is doing the same, and I just smile. “Hey,” I say.

“Hey. Come on,” he says.

We don’t talk much. He keeps pace with me, which is surprising, considering I’m not going slow. I set a nice pace. I can’t help but get turned on by him running next to me. His muscles moving so easily and the sweat dripping off of him, I can hear his breath. I try to concentrate on my breathing and my steps so I don’t pop a boner, but it’s not working.

I thought it would be weird, since we kind of left things super awkward yesterday. It isn’t. It is comfortable running together. He pulls ahead and takes the lead, and I follow. We are in a wooded type area. There is a trail and we take it. I increase my pace to match his, running side by side, and I can tell he is a little winded. His brown hair is sticking to his forehead, and his shirt is sticking to him, and I can’t help but get caught looking at him. He blushes. “Come on this way.”

I follow him down a hill and it opens to a lake, and he runs towards a little shack. I follow, and he runs up the steps to the door of the shack. “Where are we?”

“My grandparents own this land. I come here to get away from stuff,” he says, reaching for the key under the mat.

I follow him in, and to my surprise, it is already cold inside. “The air is on?”

“Yeah, my grandpa normally leaves it on for me. He knows I come out here on the weekends.”

The shack is pretty nice on the inside. It has a leather chair, and a small TV. There is a small fridge and a nice counter that holds a sink. Callen grabs two bottles of water from the fridge and tosses me one. He takes off his shirt and leans against the counter. “Shit, it’s so hot out.”

I rake my eyes over his body. He doesn’t have a six pack, but he has one forming. “You play football?”

“Yeah?” he says, giving me a weird look.

“Well, I mean, you just have a swimmer’s build, really,” I say, trying to shrug off the awkwardness I feel.

He blushes. “Yeah, I swim in the summer and at school.”

“You have a really nice body,” I say, looking at him. He is smooth, all the way.

“Dude, you’re making me hard. Stop!” he says, blushing.

“I was actually thinking about jacking off when you called,” I say, blushing that I even said that, and I turn around and look out of the small window.

“You want to?”

I turn back around, and he’s already pushing his shorts and boxers down, and his dick springs up. I stand there with my mouth open. He’s bigger than me, and he is smooth as well down there. His balls hang just perfect, complementing his thighs. He starts to stroke his dick, and I can’t help it. I shed my shirt and push my shorts and boxers down.

His mouth opens when he sees me naked. He walks over and runs a hand down my chest and onto my six pack. “Holy fuck, dude, you are beautiful.” I blush and start jerking my dick. I don’t know what it is, but him touching my stomach just makes me so much harder.

I don’t know what possesses me, but I reach out and touch his waist, He moves closer, and I let my hand slip and cup his bare bubble butt. I hear him moan. He leans forward and gives my nipple a flick with his tongue. He looks up and just grins at me, and I squeeze his butt.

Before I know what he is doing, he is on his knees, and bats my hand away from my dick. I feel the most amazing sensation as he takes my dick in his mouth. I let out a moan, and he runs a hand up my pelvis to my stomach, tracing the each part of my six pack and around to my butt, grabbing both cheeks. I feel the tip of his tongue tease the head of my cock, and I can’t even describe the amount of pleasure I feel it’s like electricity is jolting through me. I look at him and he meets my eyes, and I see he’s got a hand wrapped around his dick, jerking it.

He takes my whole dick into his mouth, and I have to lean against the wall because I feel lightheaded from the sensation. He has one hand rubbing the inside of my thigh, and he passes over my balls every few seconds and goes back exploring my body.. “Cal..!” I try to say but I can’t hold it any longer. I blow my load and he doesn’t come off my dick. He swallows and sucks harder, and I let out a a whimper. I lean fully back into the wall and hear him moan as he shoots his load on his stomach.

We don’t say anything. All I can hear is both of us panting, and I look at him and he looks at me, but I don’t know what the look is that he is giving me. I don’t know if it’s pleasure or sadness. “Wow…,” I finally say.

“Yeah… have you ever had a blow job?” he asks.

I shake my head. “No…have you ever done that?”

He shakes his head. “My first time….”

“You were really good… sorry I, umm… in your mouth.”

He laughs. “It’s okay, you tasted good,” he tells me, blushing.

I just grin. He grabs his shirt and wipes the cum off his stomach, and puts on his boxers. I pull mine on as well, and reach for my shirt and shorts. “Can you just stay in your boxers with me, please?”

“Yeah,” I say.

I sit next to him and feel awkward, so I pull my knees to my chest, and look at him. I don’t know, but I feel a bit scared. He puts a hand on my side. “Hey, relax please?”

I nod my head. “Sorry….”

“What happened yesterday?” he asks.

“What do you mean?”

“Ryder, please be honest. Did you really not feel anything? Please tell me….”

I look away. “I did… but I like someone else, as well.”

“Shawn?”

“He kissed me last night. He was drunk, but he kissed me.” I look at him, and I swear I see tears.

“You know he’s not gay, right?” he asks.

I nod my head. “But maybe….”

“Ryder, there are no buts… he isn’t gay… it’s Shawn. I have known him longer than you. He’s a great guy, but at the same time, he is starved for affection. His mom is a drug addict, and Dylan gets beat by whatever loser she brings home. I love him like a brother, but I know he’s not gay!” he says, raising his voice.

“You don’t know that for sure!” I tell him.

“Rye, he isn’t. You’re going to get hurt. You know that, right?” he says.

I nod my head. “It’s what I’m scared of.”

He moves in front of me. “Please give us a chance….I like you so much, Ryder, and not just because your insanely hot. I love the way you get frustrated in homeroom when you can’t figure out a problem to your homework, and run your hand through your hair, messing it up, or when you’re nervous, your hands fidget, causing you to put them in your pocket or hold them. When you’re thinking really hard, you bite your lip, and when you really talk about something you like, your eyes get bigger, and you get so excited you can’t sit still. I love your giggle, and when you blush like you are now… please, Ryder, give me that chance to make you happy. I know I’m not half as good looking as Shawn, I am damaged goods, I have mommy issues, but I will never hurt you or do you wrong.”

“Cal….” I say, holding back the emotions that are threatening to overcome me

“Please, Ryder,” he says, and the tears are falling from his beautiful brown eyes.

I just sit there for a few minuets and stare at him trying to process what he just confessed to me. He is so sweet and caring,…maybe we could be good together maybe he wont care about my weirdness.

I nod my head, and he looks at me in disbelief. “Really?”

“I have a lot of issues, though, a lot of stuff that you don’t know about,” I tell him.

“I don’t care, you are worth it. I will be there at your side to face whatever happens.”

“I hate the dark, and I have terrible nightmares from before I was adopted, and I hate thunderstorms,” I tell him.

“I will be there for every storm, and I will run to your house if you have a nightmare.”

“I have to see a therapist,” I tell him.

“I will be there if you want me to.”

“You really want to be with me?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“I have to talk to Shawn tonight. He wanted to.”

I hear my phone go off, and Callen tosses me my phone. I pick it up. “Hello?”

“Ryder.”

“Hey, Shawn.”

“Look I didn’t want to do this on the phone. It seems like a dick move, but look, I shouldn’t have kissed you, man. I’m not gay. You are a good kid, but I can’t lead you on, man. I know you wanted to talk tonight but I had to get it off my chest. I feel like a huge dick,” he says.

“It’s okay. It’s not like you were committed to me,” I tell him.

“Wait, so you aren’t pissed?”

“No man. Look, I got to go. I’ll see you at school tomorrow?”

“Yeah, for sure, man. I am sorry, man.”

“It’s okay.”

I hang up, and Callen looks at me and pulls me into a hug. “You stink,” he says, laughing.

“Shut up!”