Nemesis: Loud Like Love - 21. Chapter Twenty-One: Loud Like Love

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Loud Like Love

The Jekyll & Hyde was as packed as it ever got when Nick arrived that night. The median age was about twenty-five, as the over thirties tended to go to one of the pubs. It was very loud. Looking around, he discovered that Matt had managed to snag a table all the way in the back, and was sitting there with Alan, Chas, and Ellie. He popped up when Nick approached and hugged him.

‘You made it! Here, you can leave your coat. Go get a drink!’

Nick did as he was asked and made his way over to the bar. It was, he realised, his first night out since he had turned eighteen. Except for the concert in Sapswell, but that didn’t really count, and he had only had one drink, anyway. There was a bit of a queue.

Before he had time to order, Stuart appeared at his side and gave him a one-armed hug. ‘Hey! Let me buy you a drink! What would you like?’

Nick shrugged. ‘Never say no to free booze. Just a beer will do, please.’

‘No such thing as just a beer! I’ll get you an ale!’ Stuart looked happy, and for a moment Nick wondered if he was drunk, but he appeared perfectly sober.

‘You’re in a good mood.’ Nick smiled.

‘I’m out with my best friend! How could I not be in a good mood?’ The bartender turned to them, and Stuart ordered for them. ‘Believe it or not, I don’t get out much. Mostly feels like a waste of time, but not if I get to hang out with you.’ They got their beers and started to make their way to the table through the crowd. ‘Is Dave coming?’

‘Far as I know.’

‘Anything new happening, there?’

Nick couldn’t help but smile, and looked down at the frothy head of his beer. ‘Maybe. I mean, yes. Just don’t know what yet.’

Stuart smiled wryly. ‘You say that, but I think you do. Oh, he’s over there!’ he said as the table came into view. ‘Mel, too. That’s great!’

‘Nick!’ Mel waved at him, smiling, and gave him a hug when he got close enough. ‘Feels like forever, even if it’s just been a few weeks, right?’

‘Yeah!’ Nick hugged her back and turned to Dave. He had Mandi with him, and two people Nick didn’t recognise. One of them looked vaguely familiar. Nick hugged Dave, who smelled like Dave, snd turned to Mandira, whom he hadn’t seen or spoken to in a year. He was pleased to find that she hugged him, too.

‘It’s good to see you, Nick,’ she said, and looked like she meant it.

‘Yeah, you too. Your parents let you out of the house, then?’

She laughed. ‘Mum was upset. Dad said I’m eighteen now and should be allowed to spend time with my friends if I want to. He’s picking me up at ten, though.’

Nick smiled and turned to the strangers. ‘Who are your friends?’

Dave looked a bit awkward. ‘Oh, erm . . . This is Patrick. And his boyfriend, Ali.’

Nick felt his smile turn slightly mechanical, but Patrick’s was genuine when he reached out to shake Nick’s hand. ‘It’s nice to finally meet you,’ he said. ‘Properly, I mean.’

‘Er . . . likewise,’ said Nick, and shook Ali’s hand as well. He wasn’t sure what to make of this.

Dave turned to Mel and Mandira. ‘What are you guys drinking?’

‘Glass of wine?’ Mel sat down at the table, with Stuart.

‘Just a cola for me,’ said Mandi, and joined Mel at the table.

‘Coming right up. I’ll be back in a minute.’

Ali asked Patrick the same question, and then disappeared in the direction of the bar as well, leaving Nick standing alone with Patrick. Nick felt like he should say something. ‘So, er . . . You were the one who . . .’ He trailed off.

‘You have zero reason to be jealous,’ said Patrick, still smiling. ‘I’m over him, and I know for a fact that he’s over me.’ Nick looked away, wondering how Patrick could be so sure about that. ‘You do realise,’ Patrick continued, ‘that the reason we broke up is that Dave’s so in love with you that I didn’t even stand a chance, right?’

Nick looked up sharply, meeting Patrick’s gaze, and swallowed. ‘No. I . . . I didn’t realise that.’

‘It was after that gig of yours, back in November. I knew all along that it wouldn’t last, though. Knew he wasn’t over you. Even told him as much when we started it. It was sad, but . . .’ Patrick shrugged. ‘Now I have Ali. Couldn’t be happier.’ He put his hands in his pockets. ‘If I’m honest, I think Dave invited me out tonight so I could say that to you. He might not be aware of it, but he thinks he has to prove it to you. Does he?’

Nick blushed and looked away again. ‘He doesn’t have to prove anything to me.’

‘Didn’t think so. So what are you gonna do now?’

And in that moment, Nick knew exactly what he was going to do. He sipped his ale and remained standing, waiting in silence. Patrick sat down in the meantime, chatting with Alan. Nick felt suddenly nervous, his heart racing, and when Dave reappeared carrying a cider for himself, a coke for Mandi, and a glass of wine for Mel, Nick’s heart nearly stopped. He swallowed, and as soon as Dave had put down his glass, Nick grabbed hold of his arm.

‘I’m done thinking,’ he said, and Dave met his gaze.

‘What?’

‘I said, I’m done thinking!’ Nick repeated, a bit louder over the din.

Dave gave a half smile. ‘Yeah. Me too.’

‘Shall we talk, then?’

‘Yeah. Let’s go outside.’

They left their drinks on the table and walked towards the door. Neither of them brought their coats, but it wasn’t especially cold in the late March evening. They walked a bit away from the entrance, away from the smokers.

‘So,’ said Nick, sounding braver than he felt, leaning back against the wall. ‘What did you come up with?’

‘You first?’ Dave tried.

‘I asked you first.’

‘You told me you were done thinking first,’ Dave retorted, and Nick looked down at the ground, smiling. Then he met Dave’s gaze.

‘I love you,’ he said simply. ‘That’s what I came up with. I’ve never loved anyone else, not like that. You’re the only one.’

Dave drew in a sharp breath of air, and let it out again, slowly. ‘Yeah,’ he said softly. ‘I love you too. I couldn’t stop.’

‘So, what do we do about that?’ asked Nick.

Dave didn’t answer. Instead, he leaned into Nick’s space and placed a chaste kiss on his lips. Nick grabbed hold of his hips, pulling him closer, and deepened the kiss, letting himself get lost in it. When they pulled apart, he sighed, gazing into Dave’s blue, blue eyes. ‘I’m sorry. About everything.’

‘I’m sorry, too,’ said Dave. ‘I held you to a standard that—’

Nick shook his head. ‘I bollocksed it up. It was my fault. Not cheating on the guy you love is the lowest possible standard you can hold someone to.’

‘Yeah, but I forgave you for that ages ago.’ Dave took Nick’s hand, lacing their fingers together, and brought it to his lips to kiss his knuckles, one by one. ‘I was scared.’

‘Me too.’

‘I’m not scared anymore.’

‘Me neither.’

Then they were kissing again, and it was the best kiss Nick had ever experienced, because it tasted like promise. It tasted like love. Dave stroked Nick’s neck with his thumb, ran his fingers through his hair. ‘I want to take you home,’ he murmured.

‘Yeah. Me too. We should probably finish our drinks first, though. At least say goodbye.’ Nick laughed. ‘I think this has been the shortest night out ever.’

Dave laughed as well. ‘Matt will be disappointed.’

‘Nah. He’ll be pleased.’

They walked back into the bar, hand in hand, and as soon as they reached the table, a cheer rose up from their assembled friends.

‘See? I told you,’ said Mel to Alan, stretching out her hand, palm up. ‘Pay up, mate.’

Alan shrugged. ‘I admit defeat. Well played.’

Matt smiled from one to the other of them. ‘Took you long enough, didn’t it?’

‘Always knew it would work out sooner or later,’ said Chas with a shrug.

Stuart grinned up at them. ‘Good for you,’ he said. ‘And about time, too.’

Nick shook his head in disbelief. ‘Did you all know what was going on?’

‘Know is a strong word,’ said Matt. ‘More like speculated. So what are you still doing here? Go home and shag already!’ The table broke out into raucous laughter. Dave and Nick shared a look, and they both shrugged.

‘See you later, then, I guess,’ said Dave. ‘Someone finish my drink, okay? You all right getting back on your own later, Mel?’

She nodded. ‘Don’t worry about me. Go be a couple.’ She tossed Dave his jacket. ‘Bugger off.’

Nick took his coat, and then they turned around, still hand in hand. ‘My place?’ asked Dave. ‘It’s a bit closer. And you haven’t seen it yet, I can show you around.’

‘You can show me around in the morning,’ said Nick, and they left The Jekyll & Hyde, and their friends, behind.

* * *

Dave took a moment to look in on his mother when he got home. She was in the front room watching the news, and smiled when she saw them. ‘Hello. You’re back early.’

‘Er, yeah . . . Mum, you’ve met Nick.’

She nodded. ‘Afraid I made a terrible first impression.’ She stood up, approached Nick, and hugged him. ‘So, you’re giving it another go, then?’ she said, stepping back.

‘Yeah.’ Dave smiled, glancing at Nick. ‘Yeah, that’s what we’re doing. Er . . . We’re gonna go talk, in my room.’

His mother looked amused. ‘Right. Talk. Well, I’ll be down here if you need anything.’

‘Your mum is really different,’ said Nick as they ascended the stairs. ‘Like, a completely different person.’

‘Tell me about it,’ said Dave. ‘I like this version of her much better. Mum 2.0.’

He opened the door to his bedroom. It was quite a bit smaller than his old one had been, and without the en suite bathroom he had been so fond of. The walls were painted green, by his own choice. He was still living out of boxes to a certain degree, but the most important thing was that he had the bed from his old room. He also had his stereo set up.

Dave put on some music. Then he turned to Nick, and kissed him again. Nick parted his lips, allowing Dave’s tongue entry into his mouth. He tasted faintly of malt and hops, but most importantly, he tasted of Nick. Nick melted against him, moaned softly as Dave pulled him closer. He undressed Nick almost reverently. Though it had only been a couple of weeks since they had last done this, it felt somehow new, now. Maybe because then, he hadn’t known what would happen, where they would be going next. Now he knew.

He left a trail of kisses down Nick’s neck, and laid him down on the bed. There was so much he wanted to do, but they had time now, so he simply removed his own clothes while he continued to kiss Nick, and lay down with him, taking him into his arms.

‘I’ve missed you so much,’ Dave murmured.

Nick nuzzled his cheek. ‘I’ve missed you, too.’ He found Dave’s lips and kissed him, hands roaming over Dave’s skin, and Dave did the same. They mapped out each other’s bodies with hands and lips and tongues, until they were both hard and desperate for each other.

‘Are you really mine?’ Dave whispered against Nick’s skin. ‘I’m not just imagining this, am I?’

He felt more than heard Nick’s soft chuckle. ‘You’re not imagining anything. I’m here. I’m yours. And you’re mine.’ As if to prove it, he bit into Dave’s shoulder, and Dave gave a soft whimper, digging his fingers into Nick’s back, causing Nick to arch it. His body was warm, his mouth hot.

‘I want to be inside you,’ Dave breathed, and Nick moaned. ‘You have no idea how much I need you.’

‘No,’ said Nick, breath catching in his throat. ‘I think I do.’

They made love, slowly and gently, taking their time. They had all the time in the world, after all. They filled one another with want, and need, and love, conveying it via lips, touch, and soft sounds of pleasure. This, all of it, was love.

‘You know,’ said Dave afterwards, as they lay in each other’s arms, ‘as much as I wanted to, I couldn’t stop loving you. I couldn’t let go of you, even though I was hurt and angry. Patrick said something, the day we broke up. He said that I didn’t leave you because I didn’t love you. I left you because I did.’

‘Yeah, I know.’ Nick sighed contentedly. ‘You know, I like Patrick. He told me the reason you broke up was that you loved me so much he didn’t stand a chance.’

‘It’s true. And he was so nice about it, I felt like the world’s biggest arsehole. He’s a very kind person. Reminds me of you in that respect.’

Nick shook his head. ‘I’m selfish,’ he said. ‘The way I hurt you . . .’ He sounded almost as if he were about to cry, and Dave held him tighter.

‘It’s okay,’ he murmured. ‘It’s fine now. All of that is behind us. In case it’s not already sufficiently implied, I forgive you. For all of it. All right?’

He felt Nick nod against his chest. ‘I did so many stupid things, though.’

‘I know. And I want you to tell me about each and every one of them, when you feel ready for it. I want to know about Brian. I want to know about the drinking, and all the other stuff. I want to know everything I missed.’

‘Okay. I want to know everything, too. About you. It’s like, in a way we’re different people now. So, I want to get to know you again.’

Dave cupped Nick’s chin and turned his face towards him, so he could look into those grey eyes he loved so much, and kiss him.

He felt like an idiot now, for having waited so long, for wasting so much time when he could have been doing this every day. Though of course he knew that waiting, thinking, figuring things out had been the right thing to do. The mature thing to do. And now, they had each other. They had earned each other.

Dave was more certain than he had ever been that he never wanted to be apart from Nick again. And he knew Nick felt the same way. That was enough.

They had each other again, and that was all that mattered.