The Unfortunate Occurence at Shenandoah High 2020 - 3. Chapter 3

So, it’s week three of senior year and if I’m to be honest I’m very underwhelmed. Back when my older brother Everett attended Shenandoah, he was always out and about, going to parties, coming home at dawn – maybe that’s why dad’s hair is almost gray. I mean, I don’t plan on drinking until my twenty-first birthday and if I stay out past midnight, I’m going to have dark circles under my eyes. I wouldn’t mind attending the occasional party and Keisha and I are out and about plenty on the weekends, hitting up sales at the outlet mall.

Speaking of Keisha, I’m over at her place tonight. On Fridays, she stays over at my house and on Saturdays I stay over at her place. Both our dads are okay with us staying over at each others’ house. Her dad once said I’m cheaper than birth control which … I’m still not sure how I feel about that.

Saturdays are for catching up How to Get Away With Murder which is in it’s final season. We just finished the latest episode and my heart is still pounding in my chest. Viola Davis needs another Emmy. She needs all the Emmys.

Keisha’s painting her toenails for the fifth time on her bed while I’m sitting cross-legged on the floor scrolling through Instagram. Billy Eilish’s album is playing in the background. Keisha’s still on the fence about her but I’ve been a fan since day one.

“You know Colin?” Keisha asks pressing pause on the CD.

“Farmer or King?” I ask, exiting out of Instagram.

“Farmer,” she says. “He’s on the football team.”

“Wasn’t Kane and Adam and Jeremiah all on the football team, too?”

“Your point?” she asks reaching for the magenta polish again.

I shrug my shoulders and tap on Facebook. “I think you have a type is all.”

She rolls her eyes. “At least I have a type. You’ve been pining over the same guy since Freshman year. Finn Montgomery’s been with Emily …”

“Ugh,” I groan. “Can we please not say her name? We just ate.”

She sighs. “Finn’s been with that bitch since like the eighth grade. I think maybe it’s time to give up and find someone else, babe. They’re practically engaged. They’ll go to college, she’ll join a sorority, he’ll join a frat and then they’ll graduate, get married and have a whole lot of kids.”

“And those kids will be half hottie, half dog. What a waste of genetics. What about Colin?”

“He’s in my Psychology class and he keeps asking me to go to the movies with him.”

“Keish – you and I both know, going to the movies is code for, we’ll sit on the back row and you’ll spend the next two hours with your head in my lap.”

“Just because that happened twice doesn’t mean it’ll happen again,” Keisha said blowing on her right hand.

“Yeah – sure. Twice is a coincidence. Three times you receive a nickname. Something like Head Doctor or Mrs. Hoover or Deepthroat or …”

“I get your point. It was your idea to wait until we find someone special before we give up our goodies but a girl’s got needs.”

“I know what you mean,” I say. “I’ve been feeling the itch as of late. I’m going to have to find someone soon. Otherwise I’m gonna end up cruising in the woods behind the park or trolling the Missed Connections section of Craigslist.”

“Well – let’s pray it doesn’t come to that,” Keisha said sitting the bottle of nail polish down on her night table.

I look down on my phone and see that I have a few friend requests. Since joining Theater, I’ve been getting friend requests almost every other day.

“Oh my god,” I said as I see a familiar face listed under my friend requests.

“What?”

“Oh my god, oh my god.”

“Seriously what?”

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.”

“Babe, I’m going to slap you if you don’t spit it out.”

“Finn sent me a friend request,” I whisper.

“Well just accept it and then can we finish Dead to Me. We’re so behind.”

I look down at the photo of Finn. It’s obviously a photo of he and what’s her face but she’s cropped out. Finn is wearing his green and white letterman jacket. His hair is slicked back and his smile makes me want to sink into the floor. It’s one thing to be in class with Finn. To be his Facebook friend is like a … gamechanger.

“You okay?” Keisha asks switching to her Netflix account.

“Yeah,” I say, eyes still glued to my phone screen.

“Please don’t make a big deal of this, Babe – he’s in a long-term relationship. He’s not going to dump her and run into your arms … trust me, I learned the hard way.”

“Well – no offense, he’s in a relationship. Your dad’s coworker was married, Keish. With three kids. And a dog.”

“You didn’t see the way he looked at me at the company picnic,” Keisha said.

“I know Finn is straight but can’t a guy dream?” I ask. “I think crushing on a straight guy is like a right of passage. Once I get this out of my system, then I can date a whole bunch of Mr. Wrongs and then find my first husband by the time I get to grad school.”

“Well – as long as you don’t go all Single Gay Male on me then, dream on. Now can we watch Dead to Me. We have one more episode and then we can finally start The Politician.”

“Do you think we watch too much TV?” I ask.

“What else are we supposed to be doing?” Keisha asks.

“I dunno – I was thinking. I’d like to go to a few parties before we graduate.”

“My dad barely lets me date. He’s not about to let me go traipsing off to some party. I’m afraid some things will have to wait until undergrad.”

“Maybe you’re right,” I say sitting my phone down on the floor next to my glass of sweet tea.

“Well – I think that’s enough talk about boys for the night,” Keisha said.

I watch as she presses play on the next to last episode of Dead to Me. It’s not my fave but Keisha really likes it. I reach for my phone and click on Finn’s profile. Each picture I look at makes me sadder and sadder. Maybe Keisha’s right. Maybe it’s time to stop crushing on the hot straight guy and find something more realistic.

I flip to a picture of Finn standing next to a pool, maybe his pool. He’s tan and shirtless and covered in suntan lotion. His hair is damp and he’s squinting because of the sun. It’s the first picture of him without the Gila monster in it. Man is he fine.

Oh and he has brothers. Lots of brothers and they all look like him. Five Greek gods all standing by the pool.

Maybe I’ll stop crushing on the hot straight guy … next semester.