Jamie - The Journey Begins - 34. Chapter 34 Lights On - Giddy up!

Kate Spence was busy fussing about in the warm sunlight streaming in the high kitchen windows, crisscrossing the countertop and most of the floor, her hands busily and lovingly preparing a late afternoon lunch for her family. The kitchen was a scene that could easily frame a lifetime of childhood memories: bright summer’s sunshine streaming in the high windows along one side of the kitchen, covering the floor and countertop with beautiful long finger-like shadows cast by leaves from the row of rainbow eucalyptus happily growing outside, all the while, creating lovely family memories, coupled with the bonus sweet summery smells from Kate’s creations mixed with those from the garden outback, carried by a gentle warm breeze floating through the screen door … just a truly beautiful day.

A distant smile washed over her face, her mind still reliving the joy and high emotion of her recent road trip: taking her-their grandbabies to see her and Rob’s family over the last 10days. The kids hadn’t experienced the unreserved love of a grandparent with no parent to stop grammy-Spence, ha-ha - cuddles and a healthy dose of Grammy spoiling. They all loved it.

A sudden moment came over ,not unlike a dark cloud, causing a pang of loss and heartbreak; painful thoughts of just how Rob and she would have enjoyed these times: they were both so looking forward to Rob’s retirement, wanting to see the grandbabies, traveling domestically and abroad, even the mundane … getting on each other’s nerves in their own sweet way. Above everything, she missed her adviser, confidant, lover and her best friend/ her soulmate. The emptiness, the hole that was left behind with losing him. Her heart counted the time in days, not the more than four years that had passed.

Kate wasn’t alone with that pain: the Spence family and their widespread network of friends and associated families now connected through marriages also felt the loss. She especially saw it often in the quiet moments, etched on the face of her - their – youngest, Jamie.

Not a day went by when she didn’t feel that Rob was there with her in her heart, constantly being reminded of him by the little things she saw throughout her day surrounding her life, then her dreams at night.

A contented smile crossed her face: in her mind’s eye, she could see their youngest son, a young version of Rob, before her eyes - almost a facsimile of the man she fell in love back at Duke University all those years ago, those days of young love, moments of racing hearts just with the thought of the other, traveling abroad, starting a family - it brought a tear to her eye.

Over the past couple of years, their ‘little boy’ - their baby - had filled out and grown, both physically and emotionally, taking his full shape as a man, a husband, a dad. And what an amazing dad he was to their three kids, and husband to Ben.

She always knew that he would be: Rob often said, ‘Jamie was the one - the one that embodied the best of both of us.’ Even from when he was a little boy, there was just something in the way he moved amongst people, engaged people, but above all, loved those around him. Neither friend or eventual lovers were spared the close, engaging and genuine friendship Jamie showered freely. He had always been able to almost shine like a light of love-friendship on people, if that makes sense, Rob would say. And to think that they almost lost Jamie twice - twice too many times - and now he and Ben had given her and Rob three amazing grandbabies.

Robert Spence, the man she still loved today, was gone, but what they built together, their family and love, comforted her. Taking a deep breath, smiling, she remarked, “He is still here.” A single tear fell from her cheek. “Rob, I love you so. Your love sustains me,” Kate whispered.

In an instant those dark thoughts were swept away. A soft loving smile warmed her face, basking in the pleasure she’d been able to give Jamie and Ben with a short no-kids-mini-break, some alone time; while she got to spoil the kids unencumbered by parental constraints. Their dads got some time too.

Her moments of quite reflection were pleasantly broken by a sweet little voice. “Grammy, can I please go out back and play?” Stepping a little closer, her granddaughter spoke in a hushed, whispered, voice, “I’ve had enough nap now.” Nodding and looking way beyond her years, Kate struggled not to laugh at the total cuteness going on before her. “My brothers are still asleep. Promise I’ll be quiet…I promise, Grammy.” The little head was nodding still, as to reinforce the honesty of her answer.

"Sure, honey. Make sure you put on some sunblock and a hat, please," she said, leaning
down, kissing her granddaughter on the head. "I think your daddy is having a sleep on the garden lounge under the tree. He must be a little tired after putting the decorations up for July 4th BBQ. Maybe go wake him - it’s almost supper time.”

A few short skips across the kitchen and little Miss was busy putting her sunscreen and hat on. She paused for a moment after rubbing it all in, just like Grammy had shown her to do. “Look, Grammy,” she said proudly, turning and holding out her hands to show her Grammy that she’d complied with the request. “Love you, Grammy.”

Her little outstretched hand barely touched the screen door when she froze. The temptation was too much. There was time for more. Spinning around and skipping across the kitchen, she wrapped her arms around the legs of her grandmother. "Thank you, Grammy. I love it when you come to visit. Please don’t go back home too soon - please stay some more.”

“Oh, my sweetheart.” Pulling her close by peppering the top of her sunhat with kisses, she replied, “I love visiting with you. You know it's the best part of being a Grammy. I get to come stay with you and your brothers too.” Kate couldn’t resist, so she gave an extra squeeze plus a few more kisses on the head of her granddaughter for good measure.

“I love you too, Grammy!” With that, the little girl skipped across the kitchen to the back door. She paused slightly, turning her head back. “Grammy, when will papa be home?”

"Not long, sweetheart," a smiling Kate Spence replied. Looking at the sight of her sweet granddaughter rocking back and forth in the doorway, her face was full of smiles. “He’ll be home soon. His shift finished just about forty minutes ago.”

“Okay. I don’t know counting yet. Is that long?”

Kate shook her head at that - oh my how sweet. “No honey, not long at all,” she smiled as the screen door flew open with enough force to put man back on the moon. No matter, she bolted out the back door, her target in mind.

..o0o..

Only slowing a little as she reached the edge of the back porch, she still managed to half-run down the three steps to the grass. Still ever-so-carefully counting aloud, she announced, “3-5-6! Yay! I'm counting now."

Her journey to the back of the yard continued at full pace with time for a few cartwheels along the way. The mid-afternoon sunshine, coupled with a gentle warm breeze, filled the yard. The smells of summer and gentle sunlight peeked through the trees, washing over her.

She drew closer and closer to her intended target: surrounded by a day’s hard work of putting decorations up, the yard was awash of festoon lights crisscrossing, red-white-and-blue ribbons along the fences and also tied to a few of the tree trunks for good measure.

Slowing a little, just to correct her line of attack, then gathering pace, with a quick one, two, three steps across the small, decked area, Ava launched herself, landing a full-body throw-down on her unsuspecting victim who was taking a lazy afternoon nap in the warm sunshine. “Daddy!” She squealed.

Awakened by the crush of the four-year-old girl peppering her target with kisses and bouncing up and down on his stomach, suddenly there was movement: two strong arms wrapped around the little girl, sweeping her into a hug and peppering her with kisses over her face to howls and squeals of laughter.

Somewhat breathless after being used as a human trampoline, he said, “Hello sweetie. Don't you look beautiful in that sundress! Did Grammy pick that for you, hmmm?” Pulling her back in for another hug, he asked, “Where are your brothers - still asleep?”

The beaming little face nodded, as she snuggled down against her daddy’s chest. “I picked the dress, daddy. Grammy showed me this one and another to choose before I had my nap.” Running her hand down the dress trying to flatten a wrinkle that had just caught her eye, she cooed, “Love you, daddy,” with a look in her eyes that could melt the coldest of hearts. “I like it when it is just us, when I don't have to share you with anyone. Asher is too noisy- boys are so messy - and Alex cries some, little Ava frowned.

“Boys can be sometimes. I like it when it’s just you and me, too. It’s our special time, hey.”

Ava and her dad were enjoying their quiet moment together when a loud bang signalled their ‘just us time’ was about to come to an abrupt end. With laughter and squealing ringing out from the back of the house, they heard, "Stop it, Papa! You're tickling me … hahaha … hahaha. I’m gonna pee! Grammy, save me!! Ava, save me!” the young voice cried out, imploring help from someone, anyone.

“Your Grammy isn’t going to save you from the tickle monster, grr, nor is your sister.” The squealing increased tenfold to the amusement of the two sitting on the garden lounge who now sat up smiling and watching the antics of those coming toward them.

“Papa is so silly, but we love him, don’t we daddy?” Ava’s little face was filled deep with thought.

“Yes sweetheart, your papa and brother are both very silly, aren’t they?” Ava nodded as if no truer words had ever been spoken. “You think it’s because Papa talks funny? Maybe, but that’s why we love him, right? He’s kinda crazy weird, but in a good way.”

Her brow furrowed a little, she was trying to work out how to ask, “Umm daddy, how come Papa’s lip was all red yesterday, his hands had marks on them too?” she said with concern.

Oh crap! Nothing is going to escape this one ran through Ben’s mind. “Someone was bullying Papa and Ryan from his work, not being nice people.”

Ava didn’t reply for a moment, “I heard Uncle Aiden say to Grammy that Papa clocked the sons’ of b-.”

“Stop right there, missy," Ben held his hand up gently, calling time on the conversation.

Pulling his daughter close, gently kissing the side of her head, both reassuring that it was okay to ask, but also that she was loved and calm her. “Your Papa doesn’t like to fight.” Ben paused thinking on the best way to be honest and not break her innocence. “Well, sweetie, in this case, there wasn't much else he could do, which is very-very sad. I know Papa wants to talk to both you and Asher, so let’s wait for him, ok?” he replied while holding her in a gentle hug.

A few cries of delight and laughter snapped Ben out of his own mind. Both he and Ava were about to be joined on the garden lounge by the noisy wriggling Asher, trying his best to escape his papa’s hugs without any success, though both of them were laughing as they crashed down onto the sun lounge, joining the others.

"Hey, you! Looking better today.” Ben smiled.

“Hey you, back! Thanks. Feeling it, too,” Jamie winked, flashing his 1000w smile at his husband and little girl. “Hey sweetheart! How is my little lovebug, hmmm? Don't you look beautiful today?" Gently kissing his daughter on the cheek, he cooed. “Missed you.”

“I-e-www!! Kissing is gross!!!” a smiling Ava remarked, wiping off the toxic substance that had just been placed upon her. Both kids pulled faces at each other while their parents greeted each other. Then, without a word, both parents started peppering Ava and her brother with kisses, only stopping for a moment to swap children, with more kissing and hugs all around.

“So… gross, you reckon, Ava, hmm? Who talks funny, huh?” Jamie started blowing bubbles on her neck. “I'm a-gonna chow down on that pretty little ear and have it for supper.”

Squealing and wriggling at the same time, she cried out, “No papa! I need that one to hear what Asher is up to, and baby Alex, though he cries a bit. Still, I’m -hahaha- the oldest.”

“You’re a cheeky one, Ava. Love you to bits.” Pulling his little girl close for a hug and a quiet moment, Ava had come to a stop and was happily laying in Jamie’s arms, snuggled in against his chest.

She murmured, “I’ve been practising cartwheels like you showed me, papa. Can you do a front flip for me again? I wanna learn. It looks so cool?”

“Hmmm. Sure! I think we can do that, lovebug, I see you and daddy have been having some fun napping in the sunshine, hey,” he teased, smiling at Ben over her head, all the time poking his tongue out. With a wink of the eye, he returned his attention to tickling Ava. “Gimme that,” he continued, now holding Asher under his other arm, both kids wriggling like spring-coils. Ava finally squirmed her way free.

“I’m the oldest!” Ava asserted, standing in front of us, hands-on-hips convinced she was right. "Asher will always be younger than me.”

“Man,” Jamie remarked looking at Ben, “that look Ava was giving me, is my sister Stephanie all over when we were little! Haha, plus, Ava reminding us of that fact of which we must have forgotten, that she was the oldest just like Steph did.”

“That’s why I got a special name." remarked Miss Ava.

“Yes, Ava. It’s a very special name. It means so much to me and grammy Spence. That was my Grammy’s name, but Asher’s name is special too. Y’all are special to daddy and me.”

“Papa!” she pouted with a sense of disappointment in her voice. “You and daddy always say we're special. Aren't I MORE special because I’m older?”

“Sweet cheeks, Papa’s right – you’re ALL super special - that includes Alex.”

Ava was trying her best to think of another angle around this. But it was Asher’s turn now.

Still giggling from being tickled, now hanging upside down, half off the lounge, “Ava… as daddy and papa said, we’re all special. Besides, you’re only two-and-a-half minutes OLDER, so we’re the same special.”

With a little eyebrow raising going on there - like I’ve been known to do at times, hmmm, OMG - I had to try to stop laughing. So did Ben.

“Anyways, my name is just as special, too. It was grand-poppy’s middle name. Right, Papa?”

"Yes, Asher,” Inside I was smiling that he’d taken it so to heart about the origin of his name when Ben told them both only a few months ago. I only wish Dad was here to see them: he would have loved these two especially. They are so like Steph and me when we were kids.

“You're named after my daddy, Robert Asher Spence, and he would have loved to meet you both so very much. So, see, you both have special names. But more than that, you’re special because daddy and I love you so much.”

The two kids smiled with such innocence and love. “Love you too, papa-daddy.”

Off in the distance, the squeak of the backdoor spring signalled its opening, “Asher, Ava! Come get something to eat. Y’all should be hungry after all that commotion. Your little brother is awake and wants a cuddle.” Grammy Kate waved at the two kids.

“ME!” yelled Asher. “Us boys have to stick together.”

“Just a second, mom,” Jamie waved to Kate. “I wanted to talk to you both about yesterday.”

“Is that when you clocked the sons of-” Ava looked sideways at Ben, who was gently shaking his head in the negative.

“Ok you two - come sit here on my knee.” Both kids sat down and looked up at their Papa.

“Papa, you kinda have marks on your face and hands. Why?” asked Asher.

“Sometimes, and not all the time, ok, people do and say silly and rude things, or they bully someone for doing something that had nothing to do with them at all.”

Both kids looked confused, “But why, Papa?”

“I’m not sure, Ava. It just happens sometimes, and when it does, you have to stand up for what you believe in and what’s right. Even when you are scared or afraid, you have to.”

Both kids nodded.

“So, a few days back, some guys were saying really hateful stuff to Ryan from work outside the coffee shop.”

“Did Ryan say something to make them mad?” Ava asked her face full of concern.

“No, Sweetheart. He just kissed his partner-Dillon - on the cheek and handed him his coffee.”

Ava and Asher both looked a little confused. Ben nodded approvingly at Jamie mouthing, ‘Keep going - you’re doing okay.’

"So anyway, as I walked out of a store, one guy called Ryan’s partner Dillon a really rude name and Ryan told him to apologize. Next minute, the guys started to punch both Ryan and Dillon.”

“Is that when you clocked the-”

Ben tried not to laugh at Ava. “You’re lovin’ that word, Ava, hey?"

Keeping a straight face, Jamie continued, “Yes sweetheart, that’s when I clocked the sons of- well, you know what I mean. Anyways a police patrol came past - Uncle Aiden! - and took the other guys away.”

Both kids were staring at their papa with huge owl eyes.

"No one was seriously hurt, luckily. But it’s important to know that fighting is not the answer, and if you have to, make sure it’s the last thing you do, not the first, ok? Please promise me, both of you.”

Ava and Asher nodded.

“Now,” without warning he started to tickle them till they were a pair of wriggly, giggly kids. “Ok, go!” Jamie released his hold on the pair, watching them run to his mom who was in her element looking after two more of her now seven grandchildren.

“Love you, Mr. Rush-Spence,” Jamie leaned forward, gently kissing his husband's delicious lips – yeah, there was a slight sting from his still slightly swollen cut lip, but it was worth it.

“Hmm," Ben murmured in reply.

“Ben, I seriously had to wipe the smile off my face - although, it isn’t funny, but Ava was making it so. She was so serious, and the phrasing was perfect - she sounds just like me."

“Yeah. Let’s see how often that comes out now. If we get a call from Pre-K, they can talk to you,” raising his eyebrows, he replied. “Anyways, let me look at you. Your lip is coming down. Still tender?” Ben gently touched Jamie’s lips and face.

“I think I need you to kiss it better,” Jamie suggested, slowly pointing to his lips, cheek then his neck, and again just near his Adam’s apple.

“Oh, you do, hmm…” Leaning in, Ben gently kissed each corner of Jamie’s mouth, then slowly moved up to his scratched pink cheek.

Ben’s hands came up and gently held Jamie’s face as he worked his way down to his neck, gently flicking the top buttons of his work shirt open. His tongue made its way across to his collar bone and shoulder. “Oh my god, Ben - that is amazing…”

“Fuck Ben, if you keep going, we’re going to have our own Discovery Channel going on right here, in the yard for all to see.”

In between licking and nipping at Jamie’s chest, now heading toward his right nipple, Ben noted, “So, Skip…Hmm, you taste so good. “How…was …work? Save any kitty cats from trees today? Some street brawling yeah?” Jamie couldn’t answer, his mind was just mush, fully absorbed with Ben’s ministrations.

A quick tug on Jamie’s shirt and Ben was making his way across to the other nipple, giving the few bruises on his chest a small kiss. “No undershirt today, huh? I like it when there isn't anything in the way.”

Breathlessly, Jamie barely got out, “Oh god, Ben, you're so, damn good at this." Lifting his hand and running it through Ben’s sun-bleached hair, he continued, “I swear to God, I could do this all day. I might end up with blue balls, but anyways …”

“Hmmm might but…helped any old ladies cross the road, or did you guys go out street brawling again today?”

“Nope, no kitty cats or brawling today, but there is still time!” Jamie let out a little chuckle. “But I can help an EMT supervisor to bed, if he likes, after he gets a deserved spanking.”

“Promises,” lick-nip, “promises, Jamie.”

Slowly, I pulled Ben’s face back up to mine. There were little cries of protest. Looking directly into his eyes, I saw the same look between us was that we shared six years ago at the apartment complex in Austin when Lucas and I were recovering.

“Ben?” I murmured as I lightly kissed his lips, “have I…” now nipping up his neck “…told you how much I…” continuing along the lines of his muscles - I could feel his pulse through my tongue as I passed along his jugular - “...I love you today?” finishing at that spot just behind his jaw below his ear…that spot. The one that I could turn him into putty with.

Ben had been passive for long enough clearly. I felt the comfort of his arm as it snaked its way around my waist, gently, doing a remarkable job dodging most of the sore spots.

“Hey, you,” he murmured, dropping his head forward and down a little, laying a small lick at the base of my neck against my collar bone joint. “Hmmm,” he purred as he filled his nostrils, breathing me in.

“You had a shower after work. I can smell that wash you use. Yum.” He gently laid a few more kisses along the side of my neck, along the ridge of muscle leading to my shoulder. “You still owe me a good skull fucking, hey.”

Between Ben's hot kisses, his body pushing against mine, and yeah, he was hard there too, he undid me with the 'skull fuck comment.' My pulse was streaking ahead, that familiar dry feeling in my throat had returned as the adrenaline ripped through my body. Looking into Ben’s eyes, they were blown - he was riding the same magic carpet as I was. I swallowed a few times to get sufficient moisture to speak.

“We could duck into the bedroom before anyone notices,” I managed to croak out. Our lips gently touched then pulled away, coming back again for more, quickly deepening, my hand was resting on the nape of Ben’s neck, the other pressing the small of his back. I could feel the hardness of his abdominal muscles against mine, our cocks hardened by our make-out session grinding against each other.

“Let’s go,” I breathed out, sucking in air like a diver that had made it to the surface. His smile was enough of a reply. Quickly, I grabbed his hand which had found its way down to my cock, alternating between palming and squeezing me through my uniform. “Oh yeah.”

Mom giving us a few days with no kids had reawakened our passion. It had never faded, but with kids, you know, life gets in the way sometimes. We were like teenagers unable to keep our hands off each other for more than 10 minutes.

..o0o..

“Oh god, Jamie. We need to disappear while your mom is distracting Ava, Asher, and Alex.”

I didn’t need to be asked twice, pulling that sexy man of mine with me. "An offer too good to refuse, too good." Plus, I'd dumped the painkillers, so the foggy few days were behind me now. Strong Tylenol was enough to keep those pesky ribs quiet for the most part. If I twisted or flexed a little too much, they reminded me, but overall, I was good.

With Ben's hand in mine, we ran toward the back of the house, giggling like school kids sneaking off campus, making a line straight to the door leading into the mudroom.

Thankfully, from there, we had made the few silent steps along the hallway to our bedroom, like true ninjas, clicking the privacy lock on our door, just in case.

As I turned, our eyes met, exchanging excited looks as we started to strip off our clothes. The pictures in my mind were delicious. I was sure the look on my face matched the thoughts in my mind. Looking at Ben like a hungry predator eyeing its prey, I toed off my Chucks. Ben spotted me: clearly, I was wearing my emotions on my sleeve. His face lit up instantly as he picked up the pace getting his shoes off while fumbling to undo his belt.

We both had the same idea on our minds: “I’m gonna... As my outstretched grabbed him, pulling his naked body against mine, our mouths smashed together like fire and ice. My mind was hyper-focused on one thing and one thing only - finishing what we’d started earlier … that unfinished business. As Ben pulled his mouth from mine, he started to lick and bite his was down my body, stopping to put his hot, amazing tongue in my belly button.

‘CLICK.’ From inside our bedroom, I heard the side gate open with that low mechanical sound. Ben’s chin was resting on my hard leaking cock. I was speechless. I’m sure my eyes rolled back in my head in frustration. Slowly, Ben stood up, his hand stroking my cock, copying what I was doing to him. We both turned our heads toward the sounds emanating from the pathway.

We could see the shadows cast by Hailey and Lucas as they walked in the yard, their two kids running ahead to find their cousins. From the other side of the house came a loud bang - I’ve gotta fix that door closer before we lose the door! Asher and Ava had obviously spotted Lucas’ and Hailey’s truck parked out front as squeals of delight rang out followed by the thunder of feet. The back door slammed against the stopper for a second time in as many seconds, reaching its maximum open at speed as two little blurs ran out.

I walked over to the window and pulled the screen blind back a little, only to see fucking Lucas standing there looking straight at me like he was equipped with x-ray vision and had tracked me, lol. I heard a muffled, “You wanna put that away and get some clothes on so you can join us? Oh, and Hi Ben!” he smirked, smiling all the while.

I did what every 30-plus old would do: flipped him the bird, then did a quick helicopter with my now deflating cock. Lucas laughed just as Hailey appeared, obviously drawn to Lucas talking to me in that split second while my cock was spinning around, “Oh, hey Jamie! Lucas does the same thing with his too,” she delivered perfectly, not even missing a beat… I could feel the red burn up my neck in that instant.

Whirring behind Lucas and Hailey was Asher who was at full tilt, hotly followed by Ava. She was not going to be left out at any cost. Ben had used his time more efficiently, now dressed in a T and shorts. “Come on, Skip. Hurry up! I’ll go greet our company.” He smiled, heading out the bedroom door. Quickly, I grabbed my work pants and a T, scrambling out the door behind him but seconds later.

“Harper! Zoe! Yay!!” Ava squealed. The air was instantly filled with the wonderful sounds of four kids playfully colliding, As I walked out the back door, the four of them were rolling around on the lawn in a mess of squeals, laughter, arms and legs.

Mom appeared at the back kitchen door with her newest grandchild in her arms. Her face was alight with smiles and love. Ben and I had that whole ‘busted-hand in the cookie jar look’ going on. Plus, my shirt was all pulled out and belt half-undone. I’m pretty sure my face had the same flushed and ‘ready to fuck’ look that Ben was wearing.

I looked up at mom who was non-plussed, doing up my zipper and tucking my shirt in, while Ben repositioned himself behind me, out of her sight, trying to hide his still hard cock in the waistband of his shorts. Mom didn’t seem all that fussed - she was just taking in the moment. Smiling, she offered, “Asher handed him off before fleeing,” she laughed.

“I think not boys. Come on - time for a quick beer.” Lucas smiled fully knowing what we were about to do, grabbing Ben’s arm and pulling him into a hug. “Today guys! Hailey needs to sit down, but” he waved his hand at me “- go get my newest nephew, please.” Lucas stood there, with a commanding look to him. I saluted mockingly. The delight on his face was priceless: he’d busted us, busted us good, and I was sure he would use that against me later. Shit, I would on him if I had the chance...

Ok, so two days ago I called in to see them unannounced. When I pulled up, noticing that their house was all quiet, I came in around the back. Quietly opening the back door in case they all were having a mid-afternoon nap, I saw Lucas and Hails were heading off for some mommy-daddy time.

I could feel the smile wrap my face remembering the look on Lucas’ face when he spotted me standing in the doorway: he was butt naked except for his socks and hard like iron. His hand furiously swiping in my direction, mouthing ‘fuck-off-Jamie’. What did I do? Yep, I happily said, “Oh, hey guys! What’s up…? Lucas, sorry, that’s obvious, right.” He grimaced shaking his head. I knew he’d get us back. I’d do the same… and will again.

..o0o..

“Hi Lucas, Hailey - it’s so lovely to see you.” Mom gushed. “And look at you, Hailey - just oh my, so beautiful.” Mom was just in her element - she has always treated Lucas as a son and Hailey a daughter - pretty much what Uncle Raine and Aunt Ann Marie have done to me and Ben. She wandered over from the still open back door with baby Alex in her arms. “Here, you take your son, Jamie,” she instructed, as she prepared to sweep Hails in a loving mom hug.

Handing me our newest arrival, he was still asleep somehow! I guess the third child doesn't have much choice about quiet homes and stuff like the firstborn. I looked down at his beautiful face, just lying in my arms content. I could just kiss him for an hour and not grow tired of it. His face looked so much like Ben, my color hair and shaped ears, his little fingers were mini versions of my mine.

“I’ll take my nephew, thank you.” Lucas demanded, passing the platter to Ben while grabbing Alex from me.

“Wow! Nice work, Hailey. It looks absolutely delicious.” I Swiftly grabbed the platter from Ben. “Mom, do you want this inside”?

“Yes, please, Jamie. Thank you.”

At that, I nodded, heading into the kitchen.

“I’ll give you a hand.” Ben followed in hot pursuit.

“So how are you, honey? Jamie said he called in to see y’all the other day?"
I heard Hailey stutter for a moment. “Oh yes, ma’am, he did.”

So started the conversation between my mom and Hailey, with the usual kiss and twenty questions about the kids and work. “Come on, get off those feet sweetheart, else I think that baby’s coming sooner rather than later.” Mom was in her element, full fuss mode, with Lucas doting on Hailey and cooing to Alex at the same time. Such a softy, but I love him – them - both.

“Thanks, Aunt Kate. Two weeks to go. I think this baby should be kind to its momma and come early. You’ve been busy, or was it Ben or Jamie? The yard looks amazing.”

“Mostly Ben - I think Jamie a little. We, my lovely grandbabies and me, got back yesterday afternoon from visiting Rob’s family in New Hampshire, and Reid and Ann Marie. They loved little Alex. Some of my cousins from Georgia are coming on the 4th. Ann Marie is just so excited. I think seeing little Alex spurred her on, honey.”

..o0o..

I left Mom and Hailey chatting, my mind swirling around what Ben and I almost go up to before their, well-pleasant - but badly mistimed = visit, but a stop too.

Placing the platter of the countertop, I felt warm breath on my neck, expanding into, without warning, gently nipping along my neckline. “Ben?”

“Hmm, who else would be trying their best to seduce you in our kitchen, Skip? But I did come in to ask you, or rather, tell you something.”

Tilting my head back and groaning uncontrollably, I lamented, “Oh, I’m so fucked if it’s not my husband!” I tried to laugh but moaned instead. I don’t think I heard all that he said. “Because you clearly know my spots, for the love of God. Yes, please, don’t stop. Ben, please don’t ...”

“COME OUT HERE, YOU TWO!!. COME SIT WITH HAILS AND ME.”

I felt like someone had just let all my air out like a balloon, muttering under my breath, “Fuck you, Lucas! You knew what we were doing.” I cursed just above audible.

Ben’s face was pressed back against my neck, with one hand pressed against my chest, the other had now snaked its way, resting against my inner thigh, rubbing against my hard-on.

Lucas’ yelling didn’t even slow him down, still grinding into me, pinning me to the countertop with his body. “Does everyone,” a moan escaped him, “in your family,” still rubbing himself between the cleft of my cheeks, “yell out? Fuck – Lucas, too, huh?” he breathed out.

Biting my earlobe then moving on to nipping his way around my neck to the junction of my spine and shoulders, he is blowing my mind up right there, reducing the millennia of evolution to jelly and grunting.

My hands tried in vain to grasp something, but only found the hard surface of the countertop, unable to find anything to grip. I pressed them hard down, with the backs of my palms against the smooth surface, offering some small resistance.

“Oh sweet…” words escaped me. All I could manage was the odd deep, almost silent, moan. Even my head was lolling around loosely, rocking in time with my upper body, driven by his thrusting. I was close …“So close to cumming, Ben…” without even being touched. Through gritted teeth, I uttered somewhat incoherently, “Ben, for the love of God, you gotta stop, or fuck me, or me fuck you, one of them…” My words sounded laboured and exhausted.

The thoughts in the far distant reaches of my mind were ok. I’ma fuck’n sure my cousin knows what I'm up to telepathically, bastard!

"OK, coming!" I responded to both Ben and Lucas, someone.

Ben spun me around looking at me with THAT look, suddenly biting down on my right nipple through my shirt with almost enough force to leave a mark for sure. “Oh Fuck,” I yelped, okay a bit louder than intended, but… “Jesus that hurt Ben, really!”

"What?" He shrugged his shoulders, “you’re not gonna. I won’t have you waste that sweet juice. You’re gonna come on, in, somewhere, with me - not in our kitchen where your mom can walk in.”

I stood there panting. “Shit, Ben. I feel like I’ve just run a marathon,” I replied, gasping between words, looking down. “The bite certainly did the trick because my buddy had returned to station and was awaiting his next call out message.” Ben laughed wickedly, leaning in and dropping a chaste kiss on my lips.

We started to walk to the door when he stopped. I turned and he had a look on his face that was somewhere between serious and unsure. "What's up, Tex?”

“I feel bad, like I… shouldn’t have started all that because I have a confession to make and it’s going to seem so… inappropriate-wrong.” He took a breath, “Maybe we’ll do it later.”

“Hey,” I looked into his eyes. “You getting all hot and worked up on me? My husband, I’m happy that you …” I was stumbling for words now. My mind was back against the counter getting dry humped into oblivion. “You want to, you know, that I turn you on like that. I don’t care if you have something to tell me? Ask me? Then do it,” I lifted his chin up and looked deeply into his eyes, simply smiling. “Hey, tell me, and I’ll share something with you. How’s that for a deal? Later, when bloody Lucas isn’t chasing our asses down, hey,” I replied brightly.

Ben smiled, “Ok. Don’t hate me, ok?”

“Hate you? Are you serious?” I laughed, “I fucking love you beyond measure, Benjamin Rush Spence,” I said, while kissing his cute nose.

“Ok,” he stopped. I could see his mind thinking if it was a good idea, so I waved him on. “So, I kinda asked you something when you were zoned out on meds the other night. It was just a harmless conversation when you offered up something, I just thought it was a joke, calling your bluff.” Ben looking a little embarrassed. I slipped my arm around him and pulled him close.

“Hmmm ok go on.”

“It's just we haven’t had a moment to talk about it, and it’s kinda eating away at me, not what you said, more me asking or…”

“What’s up?” I pulled him a little closer.

“I asked you when … oh, now I feel bad.”

“Hey, hey!”

Ben looked confused.

“Tell me. After my last few days, you got nothing on me,” I chided, trying to lighten the moment.

Taking a deep breath, he continued. “Ok, so I asked you if there was anything else, any other secret that you had, you know, forgotten to share. It was a simple, genuine half-hearted question: I would never use your situation or the drugged state you were in to, you know, do the wrong thing.”

“Yeah.”

“And you said…”

He couldn't look me in the eye.

“I remember,” I answered brightly. “You asked and I said that Lucas and I jerked each other off when we were teenagers. It’s no biggie. Well, we are kinda big you know, haha." I smiled as I saw the dark look on Ben's face evaporate like a summer storm.

"Well, it's very much a biggie," he replied, tapping my cock with his hand. "I'm more than satisfied with it. You’re well into the above-average range you know, right? I love it and it loves me.”

“I love you, too. We both do.”

“Both?”

“Yeah, him,” I grabbed a handful of myself, “and me,” all wrapped up in a goofy smile. That did the trick, Ben started to laugh. "Come on, else he's gonna yell again. I can feel it building. Plus, if we stand here much longer I don’t think I can stop this time.”

..o0o..

Sure enough, as we walked out the back door, Lucas was taking a big breath, about to summon us again. "Oh, hey!" he stopped and smiled.

“Come sit down here.” Lucas patted the bench seat next to Hails.

"Do you want to go sit down the back? It's way more comfy Hails.”

“Ah no, Jamie, thanks. Sorry, boys. Y’all need to get me a motorized trolley. I’m not going to walk down that paddock you call a yard.” A very pregnant Hailey finally lowered herself down into the park bench near the house.

"So, how are my favourite boys going? Ben, how’s being the supervisor now going? Jamie, Lucas said you are being promoted to regional command?” Hailey gave the boys both a ‘spill the beans’ look. “Anyways, let me see that baby, Lucas. He’s so cute!” She reached across taking Alex into her arms.

“We’re all good here, Hailey. How about you? Looks like that baby is about to burst out of you any moment, lol.”

“Thanks, Jamie. Kinda obvious, right? Well, at least I'm in good hands with Benjamin here."

“Hey! I do ok with deliveries,” I whined, acting all offended. “I’m up to eleven now over my career, I’ll have you know.”

Ben looked at me surprised. “Eleven! When did you deliver another?”

“Today, while we were getting a kitty down, as you put it, haha.” The stunned look on Ben’s face was worth keeping it a surprise. “We were down getting coffee.” Everyone looked up a little surprised, “No - no street fighting, promise,” I said quickly, holding my hands up in surrender to the concerned looks surrounding me.

“Anyway, Aiden said those guys ended up with almost a dozen charges apiece. They’re becoming acquainted with their new prison husbands now."

That totally cracked them up. “Oh god, Jamie. Make me laugh like that, and I'm gonna have the baby here now.”

“Hmm.” I smiled at Hailey, raising my eyebrows. “Well anyways, this guy pulled up, screaming his wife was having a baby. And yes, she was. About two minutes later a little boy joined us. Just like you, my sweetheart,” I cooed, leaning over to kiss our baby boy on the forehead. Lucas wasn’t letting go of Alex anytime soon. He’d retaken him from Hailey. “He’s got my hair color, you reckon, Lucas?”

“Yeah,” I caught Lucas smiling out the corner of my eye. He was so in love with Alex at the moment, “and the same shaped fingers as us all too.” Alex’s little hand was wrapped around Lucas’ pinky finger.

“Damn, Lucas, so clucky. Hailey, you’d better worry - If he’s like this with two already here and one on the way…” I couldn’t help but smile, and nod tellingly.

“Anyways, the little guy in the car was a piece of cake. Sure, he squeaked and squawked his way into the world. Gotta say, it’s probably one of the best parts of the job, you know, other than saving kitty cats, haha.” I looked at Ben with an ‘eat shit’ grin.

Both Ben and Hailey were speechless for a few seconds. My deadpan delivery of the news stunned them into silence. "What…" I shrugged my shoulders.

“Um, nothing. Just, you’re so nonchalant, Jamie! Ben, I could understand, being an EMT, but wow!" Hailey slowly leaned across Ben and kissed me on the cheek. “Well done, you.”

"Thanks, Hails. Hey Lucas, beer please!”

"Yeah, yeah - I'm coming. Can I get you anything, Hailey? Other than getting that baby out of you, honey?"

Hailey waved her hand at Lucas. “The last two weeks are the worst. I just can’t get comfortable at all.”

“Here, let me rub your back and shoulders for a bit. You’ll feel so much better.”

“No-no! Get away from that, Lucas. That’s how this all started.” Hailey’s hands were flapping around like she was swatting bugs.

“Sorry to tell you, Hailey, but back rubs don’t get you pregnant… it’s when you-”

“JAMES! There are children around.”

“Jeez, Mom. I was gonna say when you share a coffee cup.” I said with a cheeky smirk to add to the delivery. “But anyways, I’d be worried. Lucas has the clucky ‘want a coffee’, wink-wink, look going on, holding Alex there.”

“Don’t bother. He’s already saying, ‘just one more, just one more, honey’,” she replied, with a sense of resignation to her face. “It’s gonna happen, I’m sure.”

“Buy a new flatscreen, Lucas. Go dirt bike riding with Jamie. Really, leave the girl alone,” Ben said. “Come on, honey. I’ll give you a back and neck massage. You guys have three now anyways, Lucas. Well, you will in about five minutes. Look at your wife: she’s got the whole ‘burst out of me’ thing going on.”

I couldn’t help myself, “Hey, Benny boy…”

Ben looked at me with that ‘oh, this is gonna be good look.’ “Yes Skip.”

If Lucas and Hailey have a fourth child, can we too, pleaaaase,” I offered with a look resembling Puss-in-boots, big eyes and all.

He laughed, but then shocked the pants off me almost. “I think five is a nice number.”

All of us turned and looked at Ben speechless. He just shrugged his shoulders. “Why not, hey?”

I could feel the smile wrap around my face like dawn breaking. “Fuck yeah!” I shouted with a little fist pump. “Love you, Benjamin.” We sat there for a few silent moments just looking into each other’s eyes. “Damn - what did I do right to deserve-land this guy.” I gently kissed my amazing husband.

“Ok, so…” Returning to the here and now, I leaned toward Lucas. “Hey,” I whispered in his ear. “Did you tell Hailey about when we were kids and gave each other a hand job?”

Lucas looked at me with a smile. “Why? You wanna go again? You know I’m bigger.”

"You are not.” I said, laughing a little. “They're the same." We both laughed.

“True-No I haven’t. Not for any reason… just didn't. Wait up. Hey, Hailey-honey."

She turned her head, breaking her conversation with Ben.

“Yeah?”

“Jamie and I gave each other hand jobs,” he offered without emotion, rather matter of factly.

“Today? When did you find the time?” she smiled.

I was surprised at her comeback, but this is Hailey. She’s got us worked out, totally... so had Ben to be honest.

“No, not today. When we were teenagers.” Lucas looked at me to confirm. I nodded.

“Why are you telling me? You were kids experimenting, although teenagers for you too could be, you know,” she continued, waving her hands, “last week.”

“Nah! Jamie told Ben. I didn’t want you to be left out, is all.”

"I'm surprised you two haven’t done more, really," she said with eyebrows raised. "But if you want to put on a little live-action porn show for Ben and me, I'm good for it. Ben, you were clearly hot for it before, with the helicopter show and all. " He just smiled an almost uncomfortable smile and shrugged his shoulders. My face felt like it was about to instantly ignite.

“Maybe for your birthday we can,” Lucas replied in that dirty voice he’s got going, and doing that sexy nodding thing he does… I’ll have to remember that one.

"Careful, might hold you to it." Blowing him/us a kiss, she turned back to Ben and started talking.

"Thanks, Ben. Sure you don't want to swap with me? I'm sure those two would be happy with each other." Hailey looked between Jamie and Lucas, smiling and shaking her head.

“Look at that - they’ve handed the baby to Grammy Kate, and now are showing the kids how to play wrestle each other on the lawn.”

Mom had returned and taken Alex. She'd only arrived back a couple of days ago from taking the kids to see family and all. Said she had months of loving to catch up on. I'll never forget the look on her face when I face-timed her, saying Alex had arrived.

“I know, but we love them, right,” she said, looking back at her husband and his crazy cousin.

"That porn show for your birthday might be fun to watch, Hails - get our very own lap dances!” At that we both laughed.

“Does that feel a bit better, Hailey?” Ben asked working his magic on her. You could see her visibly relax.

“Oh god, yes, Ben! Years of EMT work and physiotherapy study have given you talents that are just out of this world. Please don’t stop.”

..o0o..

“Hey, look at our adult children: the kids have spotted them wrestling on the lawn – obviously, too much of an opportunity to pass up.” Both men were now covered with a blanket of arms and legs, with enough squealing and laughter to wake the dead.

“So, Adam and Julie are going fantastically. Jamie said they’ve rented a fully decked out house in Waco for a couple of months while Adam signs off some development co-project up there. Jamie was saying he’s super excited to see them. Jules, Adam and the kids are due tomorrow, just in time for the 4th of July, plus our friends from Frankfurt, Germany, are flying in again. Haven’t seen them since Ava and Asher were born.”

"Oh, wow! How are Peter, Mia, Mitt and Lana? It’s amazing that you guys stayed friends from such a chance meeting, right?”

“Yeah, I know. They didn’t even know that Jamie and I broke up for a while back then, but it’s been so great to see them every few years since all great. Mitt and Lina have two little girls now. Peter and Mia are expecting their first in later November - around Thanksgiving.”

“Just have to say, Ben, best bit of matchmaking from your husband ever with Adam and Julie. I remember Lucas saying Adam had been Jamie’s friend since grade school or something?”

“Yeah, they go way back. Funny though - Jamie didn't originally set out to matchmake. He wanted Julie to have somewhere to stay after she and Mason separated. At the same time, he was buying a place from Adam, and the rest is …”

“A little family, hahaha."

“Yes. Oh, too funny, ma’am.”

“Hey - don’t ‘ma’am’ me! We're the same age. Anyways, you’re gonna be busy over the next few days, with July 4th here, right.”

"Yep. All of my family and Jamie's will be here - Adam, Julie and the kids - Stephanie, Todd, and Logan, also."

“Every time Jamie Facetimes with the family and friends in Australia, someone else has another baby on the way. Oh wait, did Lucas tell you?”

“No, what?”

“Jamie came in the other night saying he couldn’t believe it: Mason and his partner are expecting a baby too?”

“My god, Ben, no way! Lucas doesn’t know yet. He hasn’t told me.”

“Yep, just couldn’t believe it. Although my husband can be an airhead sometimes, he’s not going to forget that. I doubt that Jamie hasn’t told Lucas - those too have zero secrets. While we’re gossiping, Hails… Kate let it slip that Stephanie and Todd are expecting a surprise second.”

“What! The ‘surprise’ being the word. Isn’t Logan only seven months old?” Hailey’s face was full of surprise.

“Yeah. Apparently, he was only 16 weeks when it happened.” Ben smiled, “Maybe someone had a back rub too, haha.”

Hailey ignored Ben’s comment. “What the hell is in the water with this family? Kids are popping up everywhere”.

“You should have seen Jamie’s face - he was just over the moon when he heard. He begged his mom to let him call her and congratulate them, to which she was absolutely ‘no’! He looked like someone had hit his puppy, such sad eyes. Kate went on to reason that he wasn’t even supposed to know and promise her that he had to act like he didn’t know when he sees them. I seriously thought he was gonna throw down a full hissy fit, but I finally talked him down. They're coming over from Pearl as well. I think they’re going to make the big announcement, here on the 4th.” Hailey’s face changed - she was clearly thinking about something, a time or place maybe.

“Ben, was that Tuesday?” Hailey was intensely staring across the yard to her husband.

“Yeah, it was… Jamie couldn’t stop talking about it after his shift. Why?”

“Lucas got a call from Jamie, late,” she replied, stopping and tapping her finger against her chin. “Lucas ducked into the back room. There were a few ‘no ways’ and ‘my god’s’ going on. Then he walked in as if nothing happened. When I asked him, he said that ‘Jamie was something, something’ and quietly walked away, trying not to draw attention to himself. Didn’t work though, ha.”

Ben rolled his eyes, half laughing. “My god those two will never change, but they’re not fooling anyone, right, and they can’t see it, Hailey!”

“Would we want them to change? Nope! Ohhh… you are a god at rubbing my sore body. Thank you.”

..o0o..

“Okay guys, I’m gonna fight my way through this crowd of kids and find Ben and Hailey before they hatch some plan. Lucas, those two are just plain dangerous together alone for too long.”

Lucas nodded in agreement while trying to free himself from the pile of small kids that were hanging off him. “Yeah, hold up. Excuse me, Ava, sweetheart - I've got to go with your papa for a bit. You go attack Jet and Daisy. They're hiding inside, playing on the PlayStation." With that, all four ran off looking for their older cousins. ”My work is done,” said Lucas, fake dusting off his hands. “Come on, Jamie. Let’s go before all those kids come charging out, surrounding us, and it becomes impassable.”

“Yeah it will be nice to have loads of people here for the 4th. Dad always loved it and Australia Day.” I smiled, thinking about some of the huge parties we’d had over the years. It was good for us kids, too - opportunities a’plenty to sneak off with some booze, and we did.

Stopping for a moment, Lucas gently grabbed my arm. “Do you still miss him, Jamie?”

“Yep, every day.” I turned to face him. “I often find myself talking to him out loud. Weird, right? But I do.”

“Not weird at all. Shit, not weirder than other stuff we've done and still do, but I get it - I miss Uncle Rob, too.”

“Thanks, mate.” For a moment, we both weren’t goofing around. The sincere look on Lucas’ face was evident. We shared a hug.

“Hey, Uncle Rob always held a special place in my heart. He was the second dad. Dad-Reid misses him too, and mom. They worry about Aunt Kate, being lonely.”

“Mom misses dad. She talks about him every day, says it helps because if we remember him, he’s still here with us. So, we talk about him often. I’ve asked her if she’s gonna remarry or see anyone else. Even told her that she didn’t need it, my permission, right.” Downing a mouthful of beer, I continued, “but if she found someone else, that would be ok with me. She’s too young to spend the rest of her days alone or filling her time with the herd of grandkids.”

“What’d she say to that?” Lucas inquired.

“Kissed me, thanked me, said that she'll never find someone like dad. But who knows what the future holds? Maybe it could be a friend to share life with. For the moment, she’s happy.” I shrugged my shoulders.

Lucas grabbed me by the shoulder, pulling me close for a moment. “Can you imagine how he’d be with all this going on - being a grand-dad to this swarm, plus another two on the way?”

"Hey, he would have counted your three also, so nine plus two - he’d love it.”

..o0o..

Hey, do you guys wanna stay for dinner? We’ve got plenty - can do a quick BBQ. I’m sure we can replace anything that’s needed for the 4th, hey. I’m going on a last-minute food run tomorrow, according to Mom.

Hailey and Lucas nodded. “Thought we were staying for dinner,” Lucas smiled

“Yeah, of course you are.” I winked at them both.

I stood up and said, “Ok … going inside to tell mom of our plans. It will either be sweet as, or there will be yelling and I’ll come running out the back door, chased by a broom,” I laughed.

“Shit, that happened to us both a few times, hey,” Lucas started to laugh while still cooing at Alex, “Ohhh … who loves their uncle Luc, hey,” as he leaned down and kissed Alex’s little hand on his.

Smiling at my cousin, I headed inside. “Mom, Hailey, Lucas …“ I stopped mid-sentence. She’d already thought of that and had a platter for me to BBQ, with the food for the kids to the side, “Jamie, cook for the kids first so I can get them all fed, bathed and bedded down, honey, ok? Then cook for us. Tell Ben to come in and grab those salads and cookies I’ve made too, won’t you honey?” She came over to the counter and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

“Sure Mom, as long as it’s-” she held her hand up stopping me. “Thanks, mom,” I grabbed the food and headed out the door.

“Wow, that was fast,” Ben remarked. “Mom’s got it all sorted - fresh cookies, bread rolls and salad inside for you to go grab, Benny-boy. I’ve got my orders - kids’ food first, us after.” I smiled at them as I walked to the small gas /propane BBQ I had set up at the end of the hose deck.

“Oh, Hailey - before you ask, you need to just sit there and be beautiful. Lucas, you’re going to abduct my/our son, ok? I’ma gonna check your car before you leave, with a thermal scanner.”

They both laughed at me hamming it up a little.

After cooking the kids’ food, Hailey and I got ours going. Lucas was inside helping mom with Alex and their two kids, while Ben was doing the same.

It was cool just to have some time to chat to Hails. We’ve always gotten on well - she’s the other sister I have after Stephanie.

After stuffing ourselves stupid, we all spread around the outdoor lounge down the yard in various states of food coma. Mom had already taken the kids inside and it was all quiet - just the sound of ‘Moana’ playing in the theatre room, and yeah, I was gently singing along to some of it… Disney was our thing as kids.

..o0o..

I’d half-fallen asleep when I felt someone grab my arm. “Mom,” groggily, I looked up. Noticing that Lucas was asleep with Hailey’s head in his lap and every cushion known to man surrounding her, she was sleeping too. Ben’s head was tucked into my neck, his mouth must have been open for a bit as there was a little damp spot on my tee. Years back, that would have grossed me out, but nope, I loved this guy and there is nothing he can do that would freak me out.

"Mason just messaged,. He can't make it for the 4th - said he'll catch up with everyone in a few days if he can." She didn’t seem surprised, a little disappointed, but not heartbroken or anything.

“Yeah, ok,” I was trying my best to be neutral in my answer. “Thanks, Mom.”

She leaned down and kissed my forehead. “I’m going to turn in for the night. Lucas-Hailey…”, she gently rubbed their shoulders, waking them slowly. They both looked up at her half-asleep, “your two little ones are asleep. They can stay over.”

“Oh damn! Really, Aunt Kate – they’re asleep? Sorry I/we didn’t realise the time,” Lucas looked all flustered, while Hailey just smirked at him as she sat up.

“Thanks, Grammy Spence.” To that, mom smiled. “I’m sure Zoe, Harper, Asher and Ada would love that. We’ll drop over at breakfast, help you cook and take them off your hands.” Mom smiled at Hailey, kissing her, then Lucas and Ben, then headed to the house.

“So, who’s up for a drink?” Lucas asked, stretching while seated. We all stuck up our hands. Nodding, he walked over to the cooler, but not before doing a fantastic dad impersonation of a loud groan getting his ass out of the deck chair.

“Comfy, hey Luc,” I smiled. he shot me back a ‘shit yeah’ look.

“Ben, did you hear mom? Mason’s not coming,” I offered.

He just shrugged his shoulders, nodding.

“No surprises there,” Hailey offered at just a whisper, but enough for me to hear, just.

The two of them exchanged looks as Lucas appeared with drinks for all. “Here ya go,” he said, handing them around. “So,” he looked between his wife, my husband, me, then back, “did I miss something?” He inquired looking a little lost.

I frowned a little. “You knew, right?” Looking straight at Ben, who had sat up now.

“What did you mean, Hails, no surprise there? Something go down I don’t know about?” My voice stayed calm and level, almost like I’d just asked about an episode of ‘911 Lone Star.’

“Yes,” A stern look appeared all over his face. “Jamie,” taking my hand, I had a feeling this was gonna get a whole load of serious in 3 2 1…

“Jamie, ok.” Ben railed. I turned to toward him lifting my leg in a half up position on the outdoor lounge we were sharing. “Umm, yeah, I called Mason and we had a little talk.
He hasn’t apologized for the shit he did to you as a kid, right? So, I suggested that he do that, or we are going to have a problem." Ben offered matter-of-fact-like.

“Oh, right. Seems Mason just made it onto my husband's shit list… bad place that, bad place.” My thoughts had jumped past my mouth filter and were out for all to hear. Hailey and Lucas looked at each other. I think Lucas must have filled her in on some of the shit that went down years back.

I could feel my eyes grow wide at that, “Um, firstly, where did you get his number from,” I , trying, not to get all pissy, but I was a bit. The last thing I wanted was my husband to have to deal with him.

“I gave it to him!” Hailey quietly replied.

Lucas and, I looked at her at the same time, Lucas mouthing ‘What-the-fuck?’ “Hailey, why do you have fuckhead-Mason’s number?” She didn’t appreciate the cussing, but…

Hailey shifted a little. “I asked Aunt Kate for it.” She answered matter of factly.

“And she just gave it to you?” The surprise in Lucas’ voice was clearly evident.

She looked at him like he’d just asked the obvious. “Well, yeah - that’s what people do when you ask for a number they have, you want.”

I looked at Ben, Lucas, Hailey, then back to Ben, confused as fuck. “Ok, I’m gonna leave that for a whole other time. So, what the fuck went down? I could tell from Mom’s expression that she was holding something back before, but …” I asked, trying not to freak out, but I was.

“Ok-ok,” Ben answered. “I asked what all this stuff about you two was, when y’all were kids. He said “you are, not-WAS! but-ARE! A spoilt, get-it-all-brat, needing to be taught a few lessons still.”

Ben’s face lit up, red and flushed, in an instant. I could feel mine doing similar.

“Son of a bitch,” Lucas breathed out.

“My blood boiled in an instant, Jamie,” he said, turning square on to me, his eyes wild with fury at the revisiting of their conversation. I saw Ben’s jaw and fists clench at the same time. “It was like your brother-what a joke really.” That last bit was through gritted teeth. “His words ignited liquid fire in my veins. Through the shaking and pure anger, I calmed enough to rebut his disgusting claim.”

“Yeah we’ve all done a bit of that over the years,” Lucas snarled.

“You’re not helping, Lucas!” Hailey chided him.

“And you are Hailey? Giving Ben his number!” Lucas jumped to his feet, running his hands through his hair and pacing about. “Like fuck. Hailey! Really!”

I was totally taken aback with Lucas’ outburst. I’ve never seen him or Hailey have a bad word between them., “Hey, guys - chill please! I don’t want anyone to fight or get angry over him. He’s not worth it, ok. Please.”

I stood up and grabbed Lucas, hugging him close for a moment. “Hey, thank you Luc. Love you too, ok, but it’s ok-really its ok. don’t be mad with Hail’s, ok? I love you guys too much to see y’all fighting over that dick.”

I looked over his shoulder at Hailey. She was sitting there, touched by Lucas’ outburst and my reaction. She’s such an awesome girl. Yeah, she was pissed at Lucas’ outburst - he was going to do some kiss-ass after, but Hailey wasn’t the type to be pissed at him - or anyone really - for more than needed.

Hugging me back, his voice muffled, he said, “Sorry… I just can’t help it. He’s the only person on the planet that sets me off – like instantly - crazy sets me off.” He sounded so flat and upset.

“Come on. Come sit next to your amazing wife, hey.” I turned him and slowly sat him down next to Hailey. “Now Lucas, you kiss Hailey and say ‘Sorry, Hailey - I was an ass. I shouldn’t have raised my voice at you,” I said in the same voice that his mom used on us a few times - plus I was smiling at the end of it.

Lucas, to his credit, looked her in the eyes. “Sorry, Hails. I was a dick and shouldn’t have said that to you, or like, you know, in that, tone.” He kissed her cheek ever so gently. It was really cute to watch.

The dam broke between them. Hailey kissed him back. “Sorry, Luc, honey. Thought I was helping. Ben made it clear he wanted to speak to Mason no matter what.”

My mind was racing: Shit! how far did this go? The thought, repeating over and over in my head, was, ‘Oh Mason- you dickhead, you son of a bitch!’

Ben took a breath for a moment, swallowing down a load of anger. My outstretched hand rested on his shoulder, trying to calm him - convey without words my feelings.

Ben wasn’t mad at me: he was pissed at Mason. Short of saying there was something up with one of the kids, I could clearly see that Ben wasn’t in the mood or place to hear me, or listen to what I wanted to say to diffuse the situation, I don’t think.

It was time for me to remain quiet, supportive and stay quiet, yeah twice.

“I told him, how y’all have worked hard for everything you have achieved academically, personally and professionally.” Ben’s voice was quiet, calm and even… very much danger signs, kinda like the calm before the cyclone - no wait - y’all say ‘tornado’ – oops, my Aussie bad, haha.

The intensity on Ben’s face grew, if possible, “He’s jealous! As crazy as it sounds, Jamie, your broth- Mason - is pure and simply jealous of you! I couldn’t help it. I’m sorry.” Ben reached over and took hold of my hand, gently tilting his head and laying a soft kiss upon my hand as the anger in him passed like a summer’s thunderstorm.

“The words poured out - Oh, bless your heart. Y’all feel bad because you can’t put yourself out there like Jamie does? Like the rest of the family does?”

My mind was saying ‘zing, burn, zing’ at Ben’s comments.

“Maybe, instead of pitching a fit like some toddler, y’all could have tried to make friends with everybody like ‘your stupid ass brother did,’ hmm. You were too caught up in your pity party for one?” Ben paused, “I honestly thought my head was about to explode, my tone and volume had been increasing to a point where I could notice it now, but I wasn’t done.”

I looked at my husband, poor Jamie, he was sitting there like a deer in the headlights, trying his best, I could see, to remain calm to try and keep me calm, this is the side of him that people don’t often see - the considerate, kind, break-your-heart caring side of him, that he gives to those who he loves without question without offer of reward.

“Hey, you ok?” Ben asked me.

He’d stopped talking and was looking at me, like he was looking into me, inside me. I nodded, unconvincingly, but nodded all the same.

Back to my car loving days, Ben was like a turbo-charged sportscar fully boosted up now and heading down the quarter mile track under 6 seconds. “I pointed out to Mason, that instead of taking advantage of your ability to socialize, learn the easy way you-Jamie, you know his brother-,”

The look on Ben’s face was priceless, each time when he said my brother’s name, it was like he’d just smelled my dirty socks or something, I had to try my best not to smile or laugh, or I’d be on that list also quick smart, right, if I did.

“-makes friends, and you know try make some yourself? Play the advantage, but you were, ARE jealous of it, of him.” A look of despair washed through him.

I couldn’t watch anymore. I was starting, too. I had already started to get angry, like kick my brother’s ass angry.

“You’d think he’d learn grow up some, but no.” Ben shook his head.

I could tell how pissed Ben was in the language he used-was using. Normally the y’all’s and stuff, floods the conversation if he’s either excited or really pissed about something. Clearly, he was pissed.

“Ben, it’s ok. He’s just a dick. Don’t let it get to you. I’m sorry you had to deal with that, all of his bullshit.” I pulled him in and hugged his ridged body against mine. He was physically angry still – damn, I could almost taste it in the air. I needed to calm him down.

“Dick!” Came from behind me, “that’s not the half of it, Ben, Hailey! Wondered why he’s never been back here to the states for a holiday since we were like in Junior High? No! I’ll tell you,” Lucas’ voice was rising with every word, the anger and hurt was still white hot within him. “Because he knows we’re all waiting to get a chance to settle some old scores.” I knew that look on his face - I was looking back at myself when I was pissed, like super pissed.

“Jamie,” Ben’s tone was cold and level, without emotion. “Mason just laughed, albeit one with a serve of bitterness attached, son of a bitch.”

Listening in silence, I could feel Ben’s heart racing through his words - weird I know, but I could. His voice, body trembled with emotion. I pulled him in, held him close, trying through osmosis to leach some calmness back into him. I subconsciously sucked in a short sharp breath. I reviewed what Ben had told me, how upset he was, not for himself, but me, my eyes fixed on some far distant spot with laser like focus, Ben’s last words, his cold tone playing over.

I needed him, Ben, to let this go. It wasn’t - dickwad wasn’t - worth it, all this upset. I was over him and his childish games, being happily married with three kids, a great job, home. but moreover, Ben in my life, every day is the dream I wanted, the destination I looked for on my life’s journey.

“Sorry Ben - you shouldn’t have to deal with this shit. It shouldn’t even be a problem, you know.” He just hugged me a little harder, conveying his emotions to me. He let out a deep sigh, relaxing into me finally.

Ben’s voice was a little muffled at first with his mouth resting on my collar bone, almost looking over my shoulder. “Yeah, well, now he’s poked the bear, right! I don’t get it how your brother can still hold such hatred or, I don’t know, jealousy, I think? Yeah, he’s jealous of you, Jamie. That’s pretty clear.”

I felt Ben gently jolt almost, like he was reacting to stimulation or thought. “It’s sad, really. On one hand, he went on about how, in his words ‘you went running into the arms of that dud, Sean, so yeah, I beat Jamie’s ass a few times. Probably wouldn’t hurt him to get another serving from me still, I reckon.’

“That’s almost, no it is, homophobic! I know I shouldn’t have let him get to me, but it was killing me to hear him say those things – those awful, awful things, so I bit back, saying I heard Sean beat his ass a few times, too… so maybe not such a dud, Mason went all silent.”

Ben pulled back a little and looking at my face, reading my expressions, I guess. It was only a flash, a nanosecond of hurt, that shocked through me - my husband telling me, pointing out to my brother, how my first love kicked his ass a few times because of the dick behaviour he had going on.

“I know, Ben. Didn’t mean it to hurt me.” It just felt out of body weird, kinda painful, but more numb maybe. I can’t really describe it. He picked up on it, though, lifting his hand to my face, cupping my cheek.

“I’m sorry, Skip. I shouldn’t have repeated that bit - I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just got all swept up in it all.”

“Look, ok, let’s all calm down. Mom, Dad and I settled this a few years ago. They know how much of a dick he was and still is. That’s why they didn’t push it when we were having gatherings. I can see it now from their side too - how hard it must be to have a child that is the opposite of everything you taught your kids - but he’s their flesh and blood made from the same stuff I’m made of, but I’m not a… well, not him. They struggled having a child that doesn’t believe in what they stood for. God, it would kill me if one of our kids turned out like that. They’d realised how gullible they’d been with his lies, and Katie’s covering up, too when we were young. Getting all upset is just giving him the oxygen he needs. I say starve him.”

Silently nodding, I took his hand and gently kissed his soft palm. Out of nowhere, I half laughed. “Yeah, one day after Mason, you know…” I looked down at the ground for a moment, rubbing, toeing my chucks against each other.

“Well ok, full disclosure, you know, so you get it, understand it, hey.” I pulled him into me a little. There was space between us, but we were in one another’s space, you know. “The last time Mason and Sean…”

“Are you sure, Jamie?” Lucas’ voice full of concern and compassion. Looking over at them both, I saw Hailey ask, “What?” Lucas shook his head, ‘no.’

I took a deep steadying breath. “Sean and I were in the garage talking and playing eight ball. Dad had converted the garage into an indoor-outdoor space for us kids to hang out, you know - away from the parents. It was very cool, we all thought. Our friends came over to hang, too.”

Ben nodded.

I was feeling so nervous. “Yeah, so, Todd and Steph were having one of their make-out sessions over on the old leather sofa in the corner.” I laughed at the memory. Ben’s face went all quizzical. “It was like a day or two after Todd found out that Lucas and I had, you know…”

“Horsie,” Lucas quipped. Ben frowned for a moment.

“That’s the name you’ve got Todd stored as - ‘Todd Horsie. I thought it was his middle name, no?”

“Leg,” Lucas replied.

I couldn’t help but smile for a second at our nickname for Todd back then. Feeling my neck redden instantly, even though Ben knew about it, it was still weird.

“He’s still pissed that he missed out on the fun,” I laughed at the memory. “The following day, Todd was still all pissy that he missed out, so Lucas, Sean and I all dropped our pants and hung our junk out at him to shut him the fuck up. Lucas told him-Todd, to put his money where his mouth was and get it out. He did.”

Ben’s eyes went all wide. “So, what happened?”

“Yeah, well, Todd jumped up and dropped his jeans, fishing out his horse cock, yup horse cock. Stephanie was telling him to stop, but you know Todd, when he makes his mind up…” I couldn’t help but laugh at the memory.

“Yep, Horsie-Todd,” Lucas said matter-of-fact like.

I held out my hands like fisherman do when saying how big the fish was. right. “It was this big, haha.” I couldn’t help but laugh again. “I’m sure that if I ask him, he’ll get it out again, you know, so you can even up the score. Todd loves getting his cock out.”

With a grin still firmly plastered to my face, I continued. “Anyway, Sean said, ‘Ok, you win horse dick,’ and we all pulled up our pants. Stephanie was a little pissed when she found out, more that we gave ‘into his bitching like a little girl’ – her words - my sister is such a bitch, in a good way - love the way she’s always kept Todd in line with gentle ribbing and joking about.”

Ben laughed. “I’ve heard her call him that, little bitch. Love that sister of your’s - the irony, right, of calling him a little bitch because he’s hung?”

Ben was finally getting to understand our, or my family’s Australian ironic humour at times, like calling someone smiley when they seem so grumpy … you get it right…

“So, Jamie, that’s why you have him saved as Todd Horsie? Would never have guessed that.” Ben reacted, a look of surprise, maybe some confusion too … poor Benny.

“Yeah, so yeah. Stephanie’s always been there for me. What she’s done, your sister Amber has done also, for us both right. We’re blessed to have them in our lives. But anyways, Steph doesn’t take too much, too seriously, between her hubby, us, and her husband’s horse dick. I guess a career in the military with all those Alpha personalities was just the right fit for her. She gives crap back as good as she gets, with interest at times, haha.”

“I think he’s a shower, not a grower - else he’d pass out,” Lucas replied. “We should ask Steph.” Lucas’ face wasn’t convinced, although he’d just asked and answered his own question.

“So, Lucas was there too?” Ben asked.

“Yeah, not at the exact moment that day, but he got to see it. See, Uncle Reid, all of the family were overspending our summer, here. Reid, Lucas and Aiden were out with him at the local mall – Shopping Centre - buying my mom and Dad a gift for hosting them for the last month.”

“And so…” Ben waved me on.

Well, that attempt of diversion didn’t work, fuck! “Ok, anyways, eight ball. Sean won the game. I lost without potting a single ball,” I said quickly. Ben looked on as if he was waiting for something, I tilted my head at him – fuck, he’s not going to let me off.

“Oh, sorry! Our rule was if you lost without potting a single ball you had to strip off your shirt and drop your pants and do a lap of the table with your cock and ass out.”

I knew we were about to cross that line. Lucas and I exchanged quick glances, the one where there’s no going back, It was about to get all too real again.

Didn’t want to do this, but I had to. Reluctantly, I continued. My mouth went a dry. I could sense a strong smell of something, I couldn’t make it out. My breath felt all ragged. I felt my whole body soften, weaken, like hunch forward somewhat. I was resigned.

“I didn’t want to take off my shirt, I knew what was gonna happen if I did.” I looked up at Lucas. He tapped his heart with his hand and smiled reassuringly. “I asked Sean… not to make me, almost pleading. Todd was in the background chanting ‘take it off – take it off!’ while still playing with his cock out – well, helicoptering that fucking thing around, like -Jesus - totally thought he was going to take someone’s eye out with it, haha.” I stopped, hoping the side story was enough to distract Ben… nope, not at all. Ben just stared at me waiting for me to continue.

“Sean saw the look in my eyes, waving for Todd to stop, he did. The room went quiet. Sean walked over slowly as though he was trying to get close to me without spooking me like some frightened animal. I heard Todd get up off the sofa, cock away now.”

The memory of the sound made me jump even now. Looking up at the ceiling for a moment, forcing the tears of anger and regret back down, I continued. “I told Sean that I just fell hard in hockey practice,” those words still came out as a rushed jumble. “He didn’t believe me, not even close, like you Ben - you guys can see through my defences. I didn’t have a hope… He suspected something was up.”

I heard Hailey let out a muffled sob.

Ben reached up with is finger, gently placing it on my mouth. “Hey, it’s ok. Don’t. Jamie. Don’t go there unless you really want to. Please, I can see how upset this is making you.” His eyes searched my face, reassuring me that he was there for me. I could see the pain I was feeling reflecting back at me. He leaned in, holding the side of my face while kissing the other cheek over and over. “I love you - we all love you! You are an amazing son, brother, friend, papa, husband, all of it.” He punctuated each statement with a kiss.

Ben took my fingers into his hand, gently kissing them while looking up at me. He stopped, placing a featherlight kiss on my lips, so softly if I hadn’t been watching I might not have even known. The look on his face, the love energized me.

Taking a deep breath, I continued. “Gently he - Sean - lifted my shirt.” I paused. “I let my arms slacken beside me, as he lifted it up he saw the red marks and bruises forming along my left side, just below my ribs and above my kidney, with a few knuckle marks.”

I transported back to that teenager. The smell before was the garage at Mom and Dad’s. I still remember pulling my arms up, protecting my stomach, chest and face. “Those feelings of regret - letting someone bully me when I knew I could make them stop if I wanted to - I was just too scared, Ben, that he’d hurt me worse or I’d hurt him.”

I was desperately trying to hold back the flood of tears. Wordlessly, his face, his eyes were a wash of mixed emotions - anger, sadness, love. Ben took my hand silently, pulling me into his lap, my back against his chest, he held me tight. It was warm, reassuring, safe.

“Todd saw them, too. He fucking freaked out! I mean totally lost it! Bursting out of the garage, screaming out his name – Mason - calling him out, standing at the back deck screaming like-like a madman. Mason walked out the back all cocky.

Todd ran at him, stopping, shirt-fronting him, slamming him into the wall of the house, screaming in his face that I was his brother, his younger brother. HE was supposed to LOOK AFTER me, not FUCKING BULLY ME, NOT BEAT ME UP, FUCKING HIT ME! Todd suddenly took a step back. “You’re not worth it, Mason! Not here, not with witnesses anyway.”

Mason, after almost crapping his pants started yelling, telling Todd to ‘fuck off… this was his home and this wasn’t his place to yell, and what was up his ass.’

I paused, steadying myself. “Sean heard all that. I’m sure half the block did - his gaze fixed on Mason, running straight out at him, bursting out of the garage like Todd moments before, just as Mason was walking up the driveway, giving Todd the bird.”

“You gotta understand,” Lucas started. “Sean wasn’t a fighter, not at all. He was one of the most chilled people I’ve ever known. It was so out of character at the time…” Pausing for a moment, he went on: “…until later when I understood it, the connection his feelings for Jamie.”

I nodded, acknowledging Lucas’ comments. “I heard Sean say to Todd, ‘Turn away - no witnesses, right!’ Yeah well next minute, I hear Sean yell ‘YOU FUCK’N BULLY, TRY THIS,’ and it was on. I raised my eyebrows. Mason didn’t say a word, Todd and Sean said they’d kick his ass twice over if he hit me, or told. I guess the bully got bullied.”

Ben was speechless for a full 30 seconds. “I swear to God, Jamie, if he was here, I would have beat him - and I don’t fight!” A wry smile crossed Ben’s face for a moment. “I did happily tell your brother that his little brother kicked the asses of two 195lb guys with little more than a few cuts, but by all means, he could come and try it on with you.”

I laughed at that. “Bet Mason crapped himself.”

“Anyways, the line went quiet for a while. Then he said, “he couldn’t get a flight and would text your mom offering an apology.”

“I replied in my most welcoming voice that he always welcome once he’d apologized for what he did to you as a kid and lose that shit attitude, else forget our address, because not him or anyone is going to hurt my husband again. And for someone that is going to have a child of their own, he really-really needs to lose the shit attitude and grow up.”

..o0o..

“Ok, so after all of THAT drama, how about we…” I reached down, with a smile wrapping my face, flashing a quick wink to Ben as I pulled out Cards Against Humanity. “Oh, hey Lucas, can y’all get us some drinks while I set up, hey.”

Ben laughed when he saw the pack. “When did you hide them out here?” I just smiled as he leaned in kissing my cheek. Ben stood, “I’ll get some snacks, Hailey. Anything in particular taking your fancy?”

“What do you feel like my little darl’n?” she asked while rubbing her belly. “Maybe some of those savoury cookies Aunt Kate makes, hey – they’re a staple around here, you’ll learn.” She looked up at Ben. “Thank you, honey.”

It was so sweet watching Hailey chatting away to my unborn niece or nephew.

Everyone nodded in agreement. I did my Homer Simpson line: “Hmmmm…. Savoury cookies…. Hmmm…. oohhh.”

Soon the anger, hurt and emotion of the last half hour was replaced with loads of laughter. Lucas was killing us all with his combinations, with Ben not far behind.

As the night wore on, the sounds of humanity - the odd car or motorbike - had ebbed away. Kind’a felt like we were the only ones still up - sounded like it too. After getting my ass beaten again and my face hurting from all the laughter, I excused myself to visit the bathroom. That ended up being the signal Lucas was waiting for to call it a night. He got up and began to clean up while I headed to the bathroom.

Although it had been a painful and deeply emotional night at times, I guess it needed to happen, kinda like exercising the demons from the closet, right. If it was possible, I think sharing it and the raw emotions have made our bonds stronger, if possible.

..o0o..

Heading quietly out the mudroom door, Hailey and Lucas were quietly talking to Ben, waiting to say their goodnights. After plenty of hugging and kisses from as all, we all stopped and looked around at each other. I opened my arms up, gently pulling Ben in from one side and Hailey from the other. Lucas did the same opposite me, a physical balm soothing away the hurt of old memories from earlier in the evening.

“I love you guys so much - would go through it all again and again just for this.”

Ben kicked it off, kissing Lucas on the cheek, then Hailey and me. It quickly became a blur of kissing and quiet laughter.

When we broke apart, Hailey and Lucas walked down the driveway holding hands. They exchanged looks, bumping shoulders, their subtle display of love for each other capped off the love I felt from my man standing beside me. “Love them both. Love you, Benny.” I smiled at him, his face reflecting mine. I slipped my hand into his. “Come on,” I tilted my head. “Mom and the kids are asleep.” The house was quiet except for some Disney tunes playing quietly in the background - mom always had music playing quietly in the house when we were kids. I’d continued the same with ours.

As we slipped into our bedroom, I quietly locked the door behind us. “Whoa, I’m feeling a little washed out after that.” I smiled running my hand down Ben’s face holding his chin gently between my thumb and finger. “God, I’m so lucky to have you.” I kissed his lips gently. His eyes looked back at me, filled with understanding … love? “I’m feeling a little exhausted after all that, you know, emotional rollercoaster,” I said while rolling my hand over his shoulder, sliding down his back and pulling him in a little closer. “Think I’m gonna take a quick shower - might make me feel better. You wanna join me?” I teased as I wiggled my eyebrows at him. I stepped back and pulled my shirt off with one hand, his eye watching my every move. Digging my thumbs under the band of my shorts, I slowly slipped them down, not breaking eye contact with him. “Oops … look at that,” I said, as my shorts landed around my feet. I was trying my best not to flex or turn too much - those pesky ribs were still a little sore.

“I like what I see, hmmm.” Ben’s eyes looked like he could swallow me up whole.

Think I was, no, I know I was-am being eye fucked by my husband. I didn’t wait, I couldn’t, not another moment. Kissing him, I slipped my hands under his shirt, only breaking contact for a second, throwing the discarded clothing off into the distance. My hands returned, sliding their way down his flanks, curving over his hips. The tips of my fingers slid under his waist band like a ninja’s, coming to rest and cupping his beautiful ass cheeks, kneading them, taking in their soft, firmness, while his hardness wedged between my own and my thigh. A small groan escaped Ben’s mouth. I quickly covered it again with my own as he kissed me back deeper, his hand coming to rest on the back of my neck as he pulled me in firmly.

We’d been kissing for who knows how long when I broke the kiss. His eyes were wide and blown, looking at me with some confusion. “Come on,” I murmured, taking hold of his hand and leading him into our master bathroom. As I pushed open the door the gently, the flickering of the candlelight of the room caught Ben’s eye.

While everyone was packing up, I’d grabbed every candle I could find, and trust me, that’s a few. Okay - I’m kinda into candles from time to time anyways. There wasn’t a flat surface that didn’t have one gently flickering away. I saw Ben’s face reflecting in the mirror above the vanity, stunned!

“Jamie,” he croaked out, “this is amazing! When did you find…” it dawned on him. “When you went to the bathroom, you did all this?” He looked somewhere between shocked, surprised, just blown away. I love it when I can do stuff to catch him out like this.

“I wanted the night to end with…” I was, all of a sudden, lost for words - yeah me! Pausing for a moment, I moved closer, facing him while looking into those beautiful blue eyes. It was like looking at a distant summer’s sky, pale blue with smaller specks of grey in them. I could just stare into them for hours and never become bored. “I wanted to show you how much you mean to me, that I’m so lucky to have you. Gav, Dave and the guys all say I’m punching above my weight with you, and I know it’s true.”

Ben shook his head in disagreement.

“I’m so grateful that the universe brought me to you, even through it all.” I paused and, gently kissing him. “All of it, I’d do all of it again tomorrow, every day, to be here with you.”

Ben didn’t answer. He gave a smile that brought tears to my eyes with the warmth, tenderness it conveyed. I felt like I’d been transported to a place, where only we and nothing else existed. I felt warm, safe, happy, loved.

“I never want you to go through anything like that again – ever!” Ben, gently kissed a line from my lips, along my jawline, and sucked my ear lobe into his mouth, switching between biting and sucking, I felt my body rock on my heels. “Sit down. I want you,” he spoke, as he guided me the edge of the bed. Grabbing a handful of my precum, he lubed himself up, turned, looking over his shoulder, as he pressed down on me, with a look of desire across his face. “Tell me if it starts to hurt, ok, skip?” he breathed out between fucking himself on me.

I was in heaven feeling his warmth and hearing the gentle moans as he rose up with just the tip of me in him, then sliding back down, slightly adjusting his position each time to extract every ounce of pleasure. When he got close to climax, his breathing would catch and he’d slow, then start up again. Thank God I was sitting down - I’d have cum ten minutes ago for sure.

“Whoa, I’m gonna cum, Jamie!” His hands were on my thighs supporting himself, “going to be a no handsy.” I felt his body stiffen and clamp down on me rolling with each release. “Jamie… I want you to fuck me, breed me deep.” He reached around, grabbing my hands and putting them across his chest, while still riding me, when he bottomed out again he pulled me upright, it didn’t even hurt my ribs, I couldn’t help but smile.

“I always wanted to try that. I can tell by that silly smile you’ve got it worked.”

“Yep.” My voice sounded deep and hoarse almost didn’t recognise it.

Ben tilted his head back, exposing his neck to my mouth – yeah, ok, he was not getting away without a couple of marks. My hand slipped down his abs, feeling every ridge and valley with the sensations of my fingertips guiding me along his treasure trail till I found his still hard cock. It felt so good holding him while I pistoned into him.

“Oh Jamie… fuck me… you are my nahhh….” he moaned, turning his face toward me and kissing me while I slammed into him harder and harder. The room was filled with the sounds of our bodies and the moaning. Yeah, my body was starting hurt somewhat, but it all fell away as I came. “Jesus, that was amazing!” Ben went all slack in my arms.

..o0o..