A Wizard's War - 37. The Tutelage of Master Toufle

The obstacle course was devious and dangerous, including unexpected traps and requiring precise timing while jumping and running over the massive stone arches. Simon had yet to complete the course even once without almost dying or being knocked forcefully to the ground. Fortunately, wounds in Meridiah could be healed quickly with a little time and focused breathing. But it still hurt a lot.

Simon saw the end in sight and realized he might succeed this time. A smile was even beginning to cross his face as he neared the final flag Master Toufle had placed for him. As if conjured by his thoughts the giant rabbit appeared in Simon’s frame of view, leaping in from the left side. Pan Toufle flipped expertly and kicked Simon squarely in the chest mere inches from the finish line.

“You fail again!” The rex rabbit wagged a brown paw at Simon before straightening his green waistcoat.

“That’s not fair!” Simon was on his feet in fury, “I completed the whole course and was going to cross the finish line!”

“But you did not cross the finish line,” Pan waved dismissively and glared back with his dark eyes, “Therefore, you fail. Start again.”

“I’ve started over a hundred times!” Simon whined petulantly.

“Then this will be one hundred one,” Pan produced a cane from thin air and then wacked Simon across the head.

“Ow!” Simon grimaced, “What was that for?”

“You are a kit,” Pan continued as he wacked Simon again, “Sometimes when they won’t leave the nest, the mother has to push them out.”

“Stop hitting me,” Simon growled as Pan began to strike him again. Simon raised his hand to block the incoming attack and should have felt the sting of the cane against his arm, but somehow it wavered in the air and still struck his head from the other direction.

“You block me with your arm?” Pan tutted, “Do you run this course with your feet?”

“How did you do that?” Simon looked puzzled.

“I’m trying to teach you,” Pan shrugged.

“You haven’t taught me anything!” Simon threw up his hands in frustration, “I try to bring up the symbols I’ve learned and the spell forms and you always say ‘not yet’! Then every day you make me train and run on this accursed obstacle course!”

“I showed you the simulacrum,” Pan considered Simon’s words and scratched under his chin.

“Probably, only because Vale instructed you to do so.”

“And how is your simulacrum coming along?” Pan asked pointedly. Simon remained silent, knowing that his new master was baiting a trap in which he could fall.

“I asked a question?” Master Toufle crossed his rabbit arms and waited.

“It is quite a likeness to me,” Simon finally responded defiantly.

“Let’s see it.”

Simon produced a small heptagonal prism of yellow crystal and placed it on the ground. He connected with the power inside the crystal as he’d been instructed and suddenly the crystal began to split and sprout new crystals. Soon a crystalline version of Simon was standing before them and as it began to alter the light reflecting from within it matched the colors and hues of Simon’s skin and clothes. Simon had been working on and perfecting the simulacrum since their training began.

“It is quite the likeness,” Pan considered as he walked critically around the crystal replica, “And yet…”

Without warning, Pan took his cane and smashed it into the side of the simulacrum. Hairline fractures appeared across the structure interfering with the lighting that was meant to mimic Simon from within. The structure flickered from its pale yellow to the false Simon it represented.

“Why did you do that?” Simon cried incredulously, “I worked so long on getting it right!”

“Do you know what the simulacrum will do?” Pan asked.

“It will act as my vessel,” Simon answered.

“When you leave this realm behind, your soul will be inside of this thing,” Pan took his cane and obliterated the entire construct with another swift strike, “And now, your soul is lost in the land of the living.”

“You told me that crystal was the only material we could use to make the simulacrum,” Simon frowned in confusion.

“That is true,” Pan nodded, “At least you were listening to something.”

“I’ve been listening, this whole time!”

“Then why…” Pan began to smack Simon again with his cane, “are you still…”

Wack, wack, wack.

Any attempts Simon made to block or move away from the strike failed as the cane magically delivered another blow.

“Trying…” wack, “to block…” wack, “with your body!”

It suddenly clicked, and as the cane whizzed through the air for a final blow Simon caught it in his hand and pulled it from his master’s grip.

“Finally!” Master Toufle chuckled, “I was getting exhausted.”

“That really hurt,” Simon rubbed his head but couldn’t help but smile a little.

“You’ve improved on the obstacle course not just from repetition,” Pan continued, “But also by trusting your instincts. You see the traps and the dangers not with your body and your eyes alone. Our souls are pure magic, and we can see more with magic than what is right in front of us.”

“So, what do we do now?” Simon asked.

“You run the damn course again!”

__________

The days were strange in Meridiah and it never seemed to get dark and they never needed true sleep. Simon could rest or close his eyes, but he was always aware of everything. Inside Master Toufle’s hovel though, it was quite dark, and the space was lit by the soft light of glowing mushrooms. Several fae liked to visit and play songs or games with Pan, but the most frequent visitor was Saggy Molly, the giant leaf-shaped katydid.

“Why is she called Saggy Molly?” Simon had asked once out of curiosity.

“Because that is her name,” Master Toufle had responded as if that was obvious, and Simon shouldn’t ask dumb questions.

Simon closed his eyes listening to Molly as she rubbed her wings together to produce sounds. It was not pleasant the first time Simon heard it, too high pitched for human ears and it set his teeth on edge, but Pan had instructed him not to listen with his ears. You had to feel the vibrations that were created in the stridulation. You had to listen with your magical senses and Simon could feel Saggy Molly telling a story. A tear fell from his cheek as he was moved by her sorrowful tales.

“Have you really felt such loss in your life?” Simon asked her when she had finished playing.

“The life of a katydid is short,” Saggy Molly explained, “I lived long enough to see many of my friends die first. My mate and my children, I had thousands of them. Some grew, some never made it past an egg. Most, you never know what happened. I think not knowing is the hardest.”

“Your music makes me miss my parents,” Simon nodded, “Friends I’ve had to leave along the way.”

“Are you sure you want to return there?” Molly asked.

“Molly,” Pan warned from the corner.

“You know you don’t have to go back,” Molly pressed, “Here in Meridiah I have become more. I am a member of a community and I get to share my music with a new world.

“Molly, that is not our place.”

“Shouldn’t he know all the options?” Molly shuffled her wings in annoyance.

“Thank you,” Simon answered, “But if I don’t return, I’ve seen Belothemid’s influence here and in my world. That damage will not stop and your home and mine could both be lost. I don’t think I can hide from my fate.”

“The gods will find another way to clean up their mess.”

“We all know there isn’t time for that,” Master Toufle commented, “I think you should go for the day, Molly.”

“As you wish,” she left with a sad look toward Simon, then she extended an antenna in his direction, “Bless you, child.”

Pan Toufle waited until she was gone and then hopped up from his perch in the corner. He pulled some carrot cake from the mantle and stuffed it into his mouth. He chewed noisily and then paced around the room.

“You seem agitated,” Simon asked curiously.

“There isn’t enough time,” Pan answered, his full mouth dropping crumbs of cake.

“I feel it too,” Simon answered, “The longer I’m away from my body. It is getting harder and harder.”

“I’m glad you agree. Then let’s run the course again.”

“Isn’t there more to magic than this?”

“This is the foundation of everything,” Pan chortled, “You have to understand on a fundamental level that you are magic, down to your very core you are magic.”

“But Breakwhite’s symbols and…”

“Pointless!” Pan waved the cake in the air, “That is the efforts of humans trying to understand something they can’t understand. That is the will of fools trying to apply order to something that has no order.”

“So, I can just do magic.”

“If you are open to it and you allow it to happen,” Pan lectured, “You can channel the magic to suit your needs. You are a conduit for power, but using too much can be dangerous to your mind and spirit. Well… in the mortal realm.”

“Let me face the course again,” Simon nodded as he stood.

“That’s the spriit!” Pan clapped, “But I need wine first, this bread is dry as a desert.”

“Didn’t I make that bread?” Simon pondered aloud.

“Not one of your strengths.”

A short while later, they were outside, and Simon was confronting the massive obstacle course that he’d come to loathe. The beginning was straightforward, and he’d come to know it by heart through simple repetition. He ran lightly across a series of escalating stones that led up to a ledge on a great stone arch that jutted out of a verdant hill. The ledge wound around to the far side of the arch, and he was able to scale the other side.

The next part was trickier as it required him to shimmy along the highest reaches of the arch and grip the stone tightly, since there were no handholds in the slick stone. The wind had decided to pick up at a most inopportune moment and Simon felt himself unable to crawl any further without risking a sudden and painful fall.

“I can just do magic.” Simon considered his question from earlier. He knew that many basic forms of magic involved the manipulation of the elements and the forces of nature. He focused on the wind as he stilled his breathing. The wind began to subside over time, and he found himself able to proceed.

Once over the first arch, Simon had to cross a large pond filled with some very angry, not to mention poisonous, viperfish. He’d always crossed on early attempts by swimming, which was a mistake, and then later by floating a log or makeshift raft. Now he studied the water and sensed the fluid nature, but a realization occurred to him that water is not always fluid.

“That’s it!” He heard Pan call from far off, “Don’t think about what is there, instead think about what is possible!”

Simon stepped out onto the water, and it became ice beneath his foot, then the next step was met with a solid surface and then the next. It was almost too simple which alarmed him. By the time he reached the center of the pond, nervousness was rising in his throat, and he was stranded on a shrinking disc of ice in the center of circling viperfish. He’d felt so confident in the beginning, but the question of how had begun to nag at him. He’d thought magic had rules, but in Meridiah and under Pan’s teaching all the rules were being thrown out the window.

“Keep going, you absolute imbecile!” Pan cried supportively from somewhere. Simon never knew how the giant rabbit observed his training, but the rabbit missed nothing.

Of course… just keep going; easier said than done.

Simon tried to clear his mind and focus once more on creating a solid walking surface across the water. Step by step, he kept his eyes on the far bank and not on his feet. At last, he set foot on the solid ground and sighed with relief. Hands on his knees, panting for breath, Simon almost missed the razor disc flying in his direction.

Simon bit his tongue as he dropped hard onto the ground as the disc went by singing. He looked around wide-eyed since there were never razor discs in this part of the course before. There had only been the giant boulder… which was now hurtling down the slope as Simon lay prone on the ground.

“Esther’s tits!” He cursed.

Simon tried to get up and sensed two more razor discs propelled from the left and right simultaneously in response to his movement. He rolled out of the way just in time, but felt his arm get sliced deeply by another razor disc he hadn’t even noticed from behind. Blood soaked his shirt and began to pour down his hand. He looked in terror at the boulder mere seconds from flattening him.

Simon held out his uninjured arm in front of him almost in a knee-jerk reaction to stop the boulder, like using your arms to stop a fall. An action born of pure instinct. To his surprise the boulder stopped its movement and came to rest just as it touched his outstretched palm. Simon was ready to celebrate or cry with relief, but he ducked instead as another razor disc came from behind him. It clipped a bit of his hair before crashing into the boulder. The disc was so sharp it embedded itself in the solid stone.

“Are you trying to kill me!” Simon yelled in frustration as he observed his bleeding arm. He tore the sleeve and then wrapped it around the wound to slow the blood loss. Overhead, he heard Pan chuckle as he passed by unseen.

“Psychotic rabbit,” Simon muttered under his breath.

Simon decided to wash some of the slick blood from his hand before moving on, since there was more climbing ahead. He didn’t waste much time rinsing in the pool as his blood quickly drew the hungry viperfish. Once around the boulder he had a clear view of the next stone arch he’d need to cross. At this point, as in many of his previous attempts, citizens of the nearby fae village were gathering beneath the next arch to observe.

“Go, Simon!” a particularly adorable young gnome called from the crowd. He was perched on his father’s shoulders, which still made them half Simon’s own height. Simon recognized the boy as Daedalus. He had quickly become Simon’s biggest fan and rarely missed a run through the course.

In many ways, Simon felt guilty when Daedalus looked at him with such wonder and awe. Simon didn’t feel particularly brave despite what he’d experienced, and he didn’t always find his decisions to be the most appropriate or rational. He’d definitely accepted a demon into his own body far too easily. Or maybe the emotion Daedalus evoked was sadness because it was not that long ago that Simon felt equally innocent and now that was gone.

Despite his mixed feelings and reservations, Daedalus always cheered Simon up and made him want to perform better. He gestured toward the little gnome, pumping a fist in the air in triumph and Daedalus returned the pose.

Simon was nearly at the base of the next arch when he sensed a sudden shift in the atmosphere around him. Hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. Then the hairs on his arms and his scalp tingled too. Simon danced out of the way as a ferocious bolt of lightning struck the ground where he had been standing. The intense blast and concussive boom blasted Simon backward and he tumbled several times before collapsing in a heap.

Daedalus let out a surprised yelp and called out to see if Simon was harmed.

“I almost had you,” Pan laughed from somewhere.

“You are psychotic,” Simon spit out grass from his mouth as he got up slowly.

“I also have good hearing. Maybe you’d like another?”

Simon could sense his skin and hair prickle again even as Pan was speaking, and he darted forward with incredible speed. He found himself well out of the blast as the second lightning bolt struck.

“You’re changing everything!” Simon panted in exasperation.

“You think the world will be predictable?” Pan questioned, “You think it will wait for you to learn the pattern?”

“Just feels like cheating,” Simon muttered.

“That…” Pan considered, “Is exactly what magic is. It’s like cheating.”

“So,” Simon shrugged, “I could just cross the finish line and skip all this madness.”

“And how would you do that?”

“I can jump over all of this and land at the finish or fly or something.”

“Flying,” Pan mocked, “There is a feat! How far can you suspend the reality you’ve come to know? You think you can achieve such a thing? What if you get way up and find yourself in doubt, like the ice on the pond?”

“It doesn’t feel that simple,” Simon nodded distrustfully, “Like I still have limits and rules that I don’t fully understand.”

“You will, in the mortal world,” Pan agreed, “But your connection to Meridiah will be far stronger than any who ever existed. You will find it easier to ‘cheat’ after your time here. Why don’t you ask Daedalus how he gets here so fast from his house?”

Simon turned to the little gnome who was eagerly awaiting the next dangerous climb.

“How do you get around so fast, little buddy?”

“I just blink,” Daedalus responded and then disappeared and reappeared on the ground in front of Simon. Simon picked up the little guy and placed him on his own shoulders.

“So tall” Daedalus marveled.

“What do you think about when you blink?” Simon asked.

“I think about where I want to go, I focus on it, and then blink.”

Suddenly, Daedalus was back on his father’s shoulders.

“That simple,” Simon chuckled.

“It is natural for the fae,” Pan lectured, “They grew up in this world of magic. It does not feel natural to you, and you complicate it by trying to understand it. You have a rather brilliant and well-learned mind but that works to your detriment.”

“How do I overcome?”

“Climb to the top of this arch, I’m waiting at the top.”

Simon looked up and then sighed. He used the route he’d found to be most safe and surefooted on previous treks. Step by step and ledge by ledge he reached the top of the arch, panting heavily and sweating. He heard Daedalus cheering below and smiled.

“Took you long enough,” Pan huffed as he observed a pocket watch and then stuffed it back into his waistcoat.

“Is time even a thing here?”

“I’m not above using props for comedic effect,” Pan retorted haughtily, “Plus, it’s well-crafted and looks sophisticated.”

Simon laughed and Pan’s scowl softened to the faintest of amused smiles at the corners of his rabbit’s mouth. His large front teeth exposed themselves as he guffawed loudly. Pan’s smile vanished as quickly as it came.

“Now, back to business,” Pan smacked Simon with his cane.

“Ow! What was that for?”

“Just curious if you were paying attention. You failed!”

Simon considered arguing, but Pan was moving on with his lesson before Simon could speak.

“There in the distance is the finish line,” Pan pointed out, “You could blink there, just like young master Daedalus. You can see it, you can focus on it, you can do it.”

“But what is holding me back?” Simon asked.

“You are!”

“It feels unsafe, it feels… wrong.”

“Do you think you are worthy to be the Seeded One, Simon?”

“I guess, not really.”

“And why do you think that is?”

“Because I was just a simple farm kid with his nose stuck in a book most the time.”

“Why can’t you be that and still be more than that? Daedalus is just a child, but he can do amazing things because he believes he can.”

Simon looked toward the finish line, unconvinced.

“I know the Mirror of Souls shows different things to people; a final safeguard to protect the world of the living. I bet you saw something that triggered all your guilt and fear. I can sense all your boring emotions all the time. Uncertainty. Shame. It’s so dull.”

“You don’t have to…” Simon didn’t get to finish his angry response as he caught Pan’s cane whizzing at his head. Simon wrenched the cane free of the rabbit’s grasp.

“Ah, there he is,” Pan nodded knowingly, “Anger is such a more interesting emotion. As are lust and greed. These are the real currency of the Seeded One.”

“But, that’s not who I want to be!” Simon angrily threw the cane over the side, “Why is everyone always pushing me to indulge in the desires of which I’m most ashamed?”

“You can’t help what your strengths are,” Pan shook his head sadly, “And resisting who you are will only move you farther from your goals. There is nothing wrong with getting angry, a bit of righteous anger is what the world in peril needs. There is nothing wrong with lusting for the power to do what you must and there is nothing wrong with keeping it all to yourself. You were chosen to do this, no one can claim the same. No one can do what you can do. Now blink to the finish line!”

“I can’t,” Simon cried angrily on the verge of tears. He knew Pan was right, but he didn’t want to accept it.

“You have to a count of five to blink, or I’ll toss you over the side to retrieve my cane from the acid bog.”

“I won’t.”

“Five.”

“Four.”

“I’ll fail…”

“Three.”

“I don’t want to be like this.”

“Two.”

Simon looked across the distance, focusing on the finish line.

“One.”

Pan leapt into the air, aiming a hard kick with his powerful rabbit legs directly at Simon’s chest. The impact would be enough to send Simon flying off the side and into the acid bog below. Simon closed his eyes calmly and disappeared.