Stonegate Stables - 20. Chapter 20

He had the doors open by then and instead of answering me, he put his hand on the boney rump of a horse as it backed out of the trailer. At least it used to be a horse before someone starved it near to death. This one was a mare, chestnut, I think; I couldn't quite tell under the caked mud and filth, and God knows what breed she was. As thin as Barney had been, this mare was worse, almost skeletal. She was shaky on her feet and I was surprised she had made the trailer ride upright. Jesus, it just made me sick to see an animal in that condition.

Matt had just spent the past two days taking care of the pampered aristocrats of the horse world, so even he could tell how bad off this one was. His face tightened up as his eyes traveled over her thin neck, boney back and prominent hip bones, and I thought he was going to burst into tears. TJ handed him the lead while he and I walked on either side of her, our hands steadying each swaying step. Gabriel had just put Barney away, so I had him fix up the stall next door real quick and we led her in.

She stood there with her head hanging while Matt held a bucket in front of her nose. She finally took a drink and I looked at TJ with a 'well?' expression on my face. He looked back at me a little defiantly, and then glanced at Gabriel who was still standing nearby. Their eyes met for a moment, then TJ looked back at me.

"She was in a filthy pen at Thompson's place, that little shithole out east by the water tower. They signed her over to me; I’ve got the papers in the truck."

"Papers, huh? You wander around the county with all the right forms now, do you, just looking for down-on-their-luck horses?"

He had the grace to look embarrassed, but stuck up for himself. "Sam set me up with whatever I might need. Look, Sean, I'll pay her board.”

“You can’t afford her board, not at this stable.”

"I'll help." TJ and I both turned to look at Gabriel. "I'll take care of her before I clock in and after work."

"Thanks." TJ turned back to me. "Sean, I couldn't leave her there."

I stared at him for a moment, then smiled. "I know. I wouldn't expect you to. Am I going to end up with a barn full of useless horses?"

"She's not useless!"

"Well, they didn't let her get like that for nothing, did they? She's probably navicular or colicky or something." I blew out a breath. "Go holler at Sam to come have a look at her. I'll put it on your bill," I added as he turned away.

Matt had been talking to the mare the whole time, patting her scrawny neck and waving wisps of hay in front of her face. He was gentle with her and the expression on his face was tender and sad. She wouldn't eat, though, and I was afraid that this one was too far gone. Sam came in, her face freezing into a professional mask as she looked at the wreck of a horse in front of her.

"Jesus H. Christ." She turned to TJ. "Are you a magnet for these wretched creatures?" He just shrugged and she began to examine the mare, shaking her head as she did a visual first.

I left Matt with the mare and took TJ to my office. On the way, he glanced at me.

"Who's the kid?"

"Long story. We'll tell everyone at Wade's tomorrow."

When we got into the office, I closed the door and turned to him. "Are you going to make a career of this? Cause if you are, I'll need to build another barn."

"Uh, actually, I wanted to talk to you about that. I’m thinking about going to work for the state as an inspector, but I need to go to vet school."

"Really . . ."

"Yeah, really." He turned away and walked restlessly around the office, coming back to stand in front of me. "Would you help me? I'll pay you back every nickel. I could work it off during school and after I graduate.” I looked at him closely. His handsome face was flushed, his blue eyes alive, and I could see this was important to him.

"Yeah, I'll help you. On one condition." He raised his eyebrows at me. "Start looking for abuse cases. Ask around, sniff them out. I'll take them all, even if we just have to put them down. At least they won't starve to death." His eyes were wide open in surprise.

"I've been thinking about it for a while. We have lots of open pasture. I'm going to start a rescue, rehabilitation, and retirement foundation. Amanda already put up $500,000 to get things going, and Teresa is processing all the paperwork. The William T. Shepard Memorial Foundation for Unwanted Horses. Want a job?"

We talked about it a bit more and TJ decided working for the foundation sounded great, especially when I offered to put him through vet school, and give him the position of head inspector at more than the state paid. He was going to keep working for Danny until they could find a replacement, looking for abuse cases as he made his rounds, and then start vet school in April. Once he was in school full time, he would spend his spare time with Sam to start getting some practical experience. I agreed to pick up all his expenses, plus room and board, figuring I could put him in William’s empty house for practically nothing and he’d be close enough to help Sam at a moment’s notice.

After we had settled the details, he came to me, hugging me close, and the feel of him brought back pleasant memories of his lean body, his appealing innocence when we'd first been together. He hadn't been over in a while and I wondered if he had found someone we didn't know about yet.

When we went to check on Matt and the mare, he was sitting in the shavings by her head, feeding her handfuls of grain, still talking away to her. She didn't look quite so hopeless now, but I’d still be amazed if she turned out to be useable for anything but hay recycling. Ah, well, what was money for, if not to help those less fortunate than ourselves?

"I want to call her Ginger," Matt said shyly, meeting my eyes as I came into the stall. "After Black Beauty's girlfriend. Remember?" Of course I remembered. At one point in my young life, I'd had that book practically memorized. I was worried about this mare, but more so about Matt’s emotions.

I walked behind him and squatted down so that my knees were on either side of him, his back against my chest as I hugged him. “Matt, you’re a good man, but don't get too attached. We can’t save them all. I’m in the business and even though I’m objective about things like this, it really hurts when you can’t do anything more to help them. We’ll do all we can, but sometimes it just isn’t enough.”

He turned to look at me, his brow furrowed in concern as he kept rubbing the mare’s lower jaw. “Do you think we can save this one?”

“Too soon to tell. Let’s take it day by day.” I kissed his cheek and left him there, figuring both he and the mare could use the company.

TJ headed for his truck and I saw Gabriel angling from the big barn to intercept him, so I stopped to watch. They met up and walked along together, heads bent, talking. I had given zero thought as to whether Gabriel was gay or not when I hired him, being more concerned with his ex-convict status and his employee potential. Straight or gay, he was working out well and I was glad I'd hired him. But something about watching him with TJ made me wonder.

When I went for Matt at five, he was grooming Ginger. All the crud was gone from her coat, and although she was in dreadful shape, she looked a hell of a lot better. She had four white stockings and a star on her forehead, lots of 'chrome,' and would be a flashy horse when she fattened up. I had looked at her papers; she was a Quarter horse, ten years old; and - surprise, surprise - her registered name was Peppy's Ginger Girl and her breeding was excellent, with Peppy San Badger on both sides. TJ had himself a darn good horse here, IF she turned out to be healthy enough to breed.

We dashed home and got cleaned up, arriving at Corleone's about 6:30. I could tell Matt was excited as we pulled into the lot, fidgeting as we valet parked and went in. Vincent had changed into his tux, which got a long up and down look from Matt and me (he looked great!), and seated us himself in one of the private alcoves. The table was laid for three, and after Vincent consulted with the kitchen, he joined us, putting a long thin package on Matt's plate. Matt looked down at it, then up at us, and the expression on his face tugged at my heart. God knows how long it had been since anyone had made a fuss of any kind over him. Nine years, at least; almost half his life.

"Go ahead. Open it."

He tore the paper off and flipped the lid on a watch, a Wenger Field Force alarm model, stainless with a black face. Vincent had told me that Matt had sold his watch last year for food and missed it terribly. Matt's mouth dropped open and he lifted the watch out of the box, holding it across his palm as he examined it. After a moment, I reached out and turned it over. 'And many more . . . Sean & Vincent' was engraved on the back. Matt's head dropped lower and I figured he was battling tears, but he was saved by the waiter arriving with our salads and a big basket of warm bread. He put the watch on, running his fingers over the back of it before he did, then dug into dinner.

After we’d gone through salads, two baskets of bread, a big appetizer platter, and a few family bowls of different pastas, even Matt was slowing down. We sat chatting for a bit, Matt entertaining Vincent with stories of his first three days on the job, when we heard a procession headed our way. Matt got a wary look on his face, and by the time every waiter and busboy in the place had converged on our table, he was red as a beet but grinning from ear to ear.

Tony set a huge piece of chocolate cake down in front of him, topped with 18 flaming candles, and all twenty-something of us sang 'Happy Birthday' to him. He ducked his head at first, but by the time we were finished, he was looking around the circle of smiling faces as if he was trying to memorize them. Maybe he was. We ate cake, drank coffees and milk, and went home, fatter and happier (and older!) than when we'd arrived.

At home we changed, Vincent and I doing our usual boxers, something we hadn't done since Matt's arrival. When he came down in jeans and saw us, he trotted back upstairs, appearing a few minutes later in similar attire. It was the first good look I'd gotten at his body. His shoulders were fairly wide, his hips narrow, with long slender muscles along his back and down his legs. Despite his broad shoulders, the overall impression was one of delicacy, without being feminine, perhaps because he was so thin. He moved that way also, graceful with his hands and his walk. He put me in mind of a well-trained dancer, his movements light and fluid.

Tufts of light brown hair peeked from his armpits but his chest was naturally smooth, and his arms and legs were very lightly haired. Although his shorts sat low on his hips, his belly was as smooth as his chest. His skin was pale, and the deep pink nipples I'd seen the other night were small hard nubs that I had to force myself to look away from. I’m generally attracted to more masculine men like Vincent and Wade, but Matt definitely appealed to me sexually, something I wasn't particularly comfortable with, at least yet. Christ, he'd just turned 18.

We sat around for a bit but we were all stuffed and tired, and it wasn't long before we gave up trying to stay awake and went off to bed. Outside his room, Matt turned to us. "Thank you. I love the watch, and dinner was great." He paused for a moment. "No one's ever done anything that nice for me."

He gave Vincent a hug and a kiss on the cheek, then turned to me, smiling.

“Sean . . . today at the barn, you said I was a good man . . . that felt great. They always called me a boy, and I hated that.” As I held him, he shifted his feet slightly and through our shorts I felt the soft sway of his cock brush against mine. He let go of me a moment later and went into his room, leaving me with an unsettled mind and the first stage of a hard-on.

It was another quiet night for Matt. I checked on him a couple times but he was curled up peacefully, one hand tucked beneath his cheek, as I smoothed his hair back off his face. I began to hope that the bad dreams were behind him and that Vincent was right - that exposure to our solid, loving relationship was a settling influence on him.

The next day was Thanksgiving, but people and horses still need to eat so we all went off to work as usual, planning on going to Cody and Wade's for dinner later in the afternoon. Matt wore his watch, looking at it way more often than necessary to keep track of the time, and I was pleased to see that he was really happy with it.

All the employees had the day off so Matt got to help Tommy, Alejandro, Teresa and Sam do the feeding, and he got a real kick out of all those eager faces peering out of their stalls, nickering for breakfast. We did a quick cleaning, then spent some time with Ginger. She looked a lot happier today, munching on the orchard grass that Sam had prescribed for her. When Matt went into her stall, she swung her big head around to nuzzle him, wiping green hay slobber across the front of his shirt. His face was glowing when he turned to me.

"Do you think she knows me?" The hope in his voice made me glad that I could answer him truthfully with what he needed to hear.

"Not a doubt. Horses are good at that and you have a knack with her. I noticed it yesterday." I left him there whispering sweet nothings into her hairy ear while she ate, and had to practically drag him out when it was time to go. The kid was going to be horse crazy after all, it seemed, or at least crazy about that particular horse.

We got cleaned up for dinner and made it to Cody and Wade's a few minutes after three. Matt was nervous, sticking close to Vincent as we walked up the front steps. Wade flung the door open just as we stepped onto the porch, stopping in amazement when he saw Vincent's shaved head, beard, and black eye, which was actually sort of greenish now.

"Jesus Christ, what the hell happened to you?" Wade asked as he hugged Vincent hard, then held him at arm's length to look him over.

"A lot. We'll tell everybody later." Vincent moved into the house and I was engulfed in Wade's big arms, smiling like I always did whenever he got hold of me.

Matt hung back, keeping me between himself and Wade, who just clapped him on the shoulder as we went in. Cody came out from the kitchen and was less restrained in his greeting, as usual. He grabbed Vincent first, after staring at him for a moment, and then me, into big hugs and planted wet smacks that tasted of spiked eggnog on our mouths before letting us go.

Before I could stop him, he did the same thing to Matt, who stiffened and jerked back slightly, but by then Cody was done with him. I smiled as astonishment, then pleasure, passed across Matt's face, leaving him with a goofy smile. When Cody turned away, Matt ran his tongue over his lower lip, and he kept his eyes on Cody as he walked back into the kitchen.

TJ, Dylan, and Adam arrived a few minutes later and we went through the whole process again, Matt getting hugs from everyone. He returned them a little more each time, and by the time Adam got a hold of him, he hugged him back enthusiastically. Adam held onto him for just another moment, looking him over closely, and I saw Matt return the gaze. Didn't get him to the clinic a minute too soon, I thought to myself.

Dinner was great (Cody’s almost as good a cook as Vincent) and we all ate too much, ending up lying around the great room lethargically, letting it all settle before we tackled pie and ice cream. Adam and Matt sat on a small sofa near the fireplace, turned toward each other, talking and smiling the whole time, although I noticed that Matt checked for Vincent and me now and then, making sure we were still nearby. Watching him with Adam made me wonder if Matt ever had the opportunity to be with someone just because he wanted to, because he liked the person, not because it was a business transaction. Matt had been hustling since he was 15, so maybe not. He seemed comfortable with all of us, and I was glad to see that he was able to relax with so many unfamiliar men around.

We had discussed our close circle of friends with Matt, and the fact that we needed to tell them at least the bare minimum of what was going on. Matt was hesitant at first, fearing they'd judge him, and I could tell he was ashamed of the life he'd been living. I had tipped his chin up so that he met my eyes, and smiled at him gently.

"Matty, what Ray did to you was wrong; that’s why he’s in jail. It wasn't your fault and no one blames you."

He had swallowed hard. "I should have . . . "

"Should have what? You were just a kid, honey. You stayed alive, and now you're here with us and all that other stuff is history. It's all over."

He was silent for a long minute, then fell into me and cried a little. I held him close and rubbed his back while Vincent watched us sadly. Life is just a fucking bitch sometimes and this was one of them. I wanted so badly to roll back Matt's life to the day before his parents were killed, or at least erase his memory of the past several years, but I settled for vowing to myself that he would never go another day without knowing that someone loved him and cared about what happened to him.

Anyway, after that discussion, Matt was okay with us telling our friends about him, trusting Vincent and me to do the right thing by him. Today was a good day since we were all together, so I cleared my throat as we finished our pie. Matt looked at Adam one last time, then came over to sit by me on the floor. I put my arm around him as Vincent gave a brief version of his three weeks in Houston, ending with the fact that Matt was living with us for the foreseeable future.

There was silence as everyone absorbed what Vincent had said. Then Adam got up and came over to Matt, dropping to a knee in front of him. He reached out a hand to Matt's cheek, then kissed him on the other. "I'm glad you're here, Matt. These two guys’ll take good care of you."

Matt hadn't drawn away from Adam's kiss and now he nodded at Adam, too worked up to speak, I think. As we took our plates into the kitchen and got more coffee, I saw TJ go over to Matt and talk to him softly for a minute. I couldn't hear what he said but Matt smiled up at him, then chuckled a little, and I blessed TJ for being the just plain nice guy that he was. Cody spoke to him also, and Matt shook his head, laying his hand on Cody's arm and smiling at whatever Cody said.

Everyone wanted to know what was going to happen to Ray, and the general consensus was that hanging was too good. Since we knew it wouldn't come to that, we figured we'd have to settle for life in prison, which at least got him off the streets. They all liked Vincent's new look and asked me if it was like having a new boyfriend. Vincent gave me a slow look and I started to laugh, remembering that morning in the shower when I'd shaved his head and the *hot* hour in bed that had followed.

Wade’s firm sponsored a variety of local non-profits, one of which was a network of retired teachers who did tutoring in one of Wade’s spare offices, so we arranged for Matt to go with Wade two days a week to work on his GED. When we left, I noticed that Adam hugged Matt a little more thoroughly than he did the rest of us. I wondered a bit about that, if Dylan and Adam were on the outs at the moment, but I didn't have the chance to ask Adam about it.

No one noticed my ring and I didn’t bring it up, preferring to wait until we had some details of the event before making an announcement. It would require a party and I had enough to do right now.

The following Monday the clinic called with the good news that although Matt was 25 pounds under average weight, he was otherwise as healthy as could be. They recommended vitamins, which we were already doing, and they wanted to see him in three months. He was becoming very comfortable with us, recovering quickly from his life on the street with the incredible resiliency of the young. He climbed in between Vincent and me on the couch, no longer caring which of us he snuggled up to, and always wanted a goodnight hug. He wore nothing but boxers around the house, and the constant sight of his smooth, pale body had me perpetually wound up.

Vincent had a dinner to cater that Wednesday night, so it was just Matt and me. When we went to the den after dinner, I lay back against one arm of the couch, a la Vincent, and Matt, to my surprise, crawled up between my legs and flopped down, squashing my nuts with his boney ribs.

I had to shove my hand under him to move things around and he gave me a quick smile. "Sorry."

I pulled him back against me and we lay there until bedtime, watching Clive Owen in 'King Arthur' on cable. I absent mindedly rubbed Matt's chest, not realizing until too late that the feel of his smooth, warm skin had given me a major hard-on. Then it was my turn to say 'sorry' as I tugged my stiff dick out from under him and tried to find some place for it that wasn't so obvious. After a moment, he sat up and looked at me, his blue-green eyes serious.

"Would you kiss me?” he asked softly. “Really kiss me, like you kiss Vincent? I've hardly ever been kissed. Mostly they just wanted me to suck them off."

I looked at his boyishly appealing face, so young but with those old eyes which reminded me that he was hardly innocent. Then I remembered that he was barely 18. Jesus. As I leaned forward to press my mouth to his, he watched me coming, slowly dropping his eyes shut just before our lips met. He opened his mouth slightly and caught his breath when I slid my tongue slowly across his lower lip.

After a moment I pulled back to look at him, and what I saw was raw hunger; he was breathing heavily and his eyes had gone dark. He braced his hands high on my thighs and leaned into me open-mouthed in a kiss that was hot enough to make me moan, and my cock lurched, thumping up against his belly. He broke the kiss and we stared at each other for a long moment, and then, thank God, he got up and left the room. I fell back onto the sofa with a confused, "Fuck!" squeezing my cock hard in frustration.

I was still there when Vincent got home and he knew from the look on my face that something had happened. I told him, leaving nothing out, including the fact that I was attracted to Matt. He watched me carefully as I spoke, then he sighed.

"Me, too. At first, I felt kinda weird about it, but then remembered what I was up to at that age. I’d fuck anything that walked upright and stood still long enough. I wasn't screwing guys our age yet, but only because they hadn't ask me." He paused and looked at me hard. "If he comes to us, all on his own, I'm not gonna turn him away."

I stared back at him, then nodded, wondering when, or if, that day would come. Then I felt the weight of something else I needed to talk to him about.

"While you were gone, Adam and I…" I couldn't finish it, but I didn't have to.

"I figured. Jesse and I did too." When my shocked eyes met his, he stared me down. "It was the night before I was going into Ray's place. I was scared and missing you terribly. Jesse had never been away from Ben that long. It was just our hands and it took about 90 seconds. I didn't kiss him."

I wasn't sure what to think. I had kissed the hell out of Adam - that's what got me into trouble in the first place - but we knew Adam well, had slept with him countless times over the years. Jesse was an unknown, and thus a potential threat to our relationship, but the fact that Vincent hadn't kissed him somehow made the difference for me, especially when I remembered how desperate I had been for comfort that night with Adam. Vincent had to have been ten times more miserable. I searched his face, seeing regret in his eyes, but no apology.

"It's okay," I told him. "I love you and it's okay." He leaned toward me, dropping his forehead onto my shoulder, and we sat like that for a while, just holding each other; then he tugged my shorts to my knees, yanked his own pants down, and dropped onto me. After a sweaty five minutes, during which I suspect we both thought more than a little about Matt, we wiped up and went to bed.