The Root Beer Boys, Part Two - 13. Chapter 13

Tommy's Diary

March 2000

Whoever wrote that song "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" must have lead a sheltered life, 'coz life is definitely NOT a dream.

Don't get me wrong, life is good. REAL good, but it ain't no dream. And I'm glad it isn't, too! 'Coz I'm having too much fun with Matthew, and I wouldn't want all of that to be just a dream. But I do get confused easily. I mean, one day I'm with Matthew and thinkin' I might be gay, and a couple days later I'm with Nancy and thinkin' I'm straight. Matthew is so great about it, too. That must be why I love him so much. We talk about my feelings and my confusion a lot, and he's always so understanding and so helpful. He doesn't push me to be gay. He just keeps saying that at our age he's happy to have me for as long as he can. And he loves me, diary. I can tell he really does, and that is sooooo kewl!

Matthew and Nancy and I have started to hang out together at lunch time at school. Matt and I are in a lot of the same classes, and Nancy has the same lunch period because of band. Matt knows how I feel about Nancy, but she doesn't know about my feelings for Matthew. I see him eyeing me once in a while when I'm talking to Nanc, but when I look at him, he just smiles and winks at me. It's great how he accepts me along with my confusion and even likes having Nancy around.

It isn't like any of us are doing sex stuff. That might confuse things even further. I date both of them and we cuddle on the couch at home, whether it's Nancy's house or Matthew's, but Nancy and I are more private with our cuddles. If her folks are present, we just hold hands. At Matthew's house we can sit closer and even sort of lay on each other and it doesn't seem to bother him or his folks. It bothered me for a while, but I've wanted it for so long I worked hard at getting over my nervousness.

Actually, I think there's something going on there. When my mom and dad are both home, they sit close in the TV room, and I see them kissing each other all the time. But Matt's mom and dad don't do that. And the way they look at us is different, somehow, especially his dad. Whenever he looks at us cuddled together, there's always this little smile on his face but his eyes are kind of sad. I think he likes what he sees more than I would expect him to. Someday I might ask Matthew about it.

April 2000

Nancy and Matt and I went to a movie last night. I got to sit between the two of them which was neat because I got to hold hands with each of them. Sometimes I'd put my arm around Nancy's shoulders and hold Matt's hand in his lap with the other hand. I know he knew what was going on, but Nancy never saw anything but the movie. I guess that's for the best, but sometimes I wish I could tell her how I feel.

Sometimes I feel like I'm cheating on her when none of us are even doing sex yet. I wonder when it will happen and who I'll be with when it does. I bet it's Matthew. Sex with Nancy kinda scares me. I mean, what if I got her pregnant? Geez, I couldn't handle that, and my folks would go absolutely ballistic. At least Matt and I don't have to worry about that, but we both seem to be happy with hugging and kissing for now. I did get a boner during the movie though. It was weird not being able to tell who caused it, Matthew or Nancy. Damn, I wish life were easier. Where's that damn rowboat going, anyway?

May 2000, Sunday afternoon

Oh wow. Friday night was special. And Saturday morning. Wanna guess why? Guess who I was with? Naw, you can't guess. You're just a book of paper I'm writing in. But you know I'm going to tell you anyway, don't you.

I was with Matthew. His folks were out at a symphony concert and didn't get home until after midnight. His mom had cooked spaghetti sauce, so all we had to do was boil the spaghetti and butter the bread. Gosh she makes good sauce. Better than mom's.

Anyway, his folks left as we were getting the water ready. After we finished dinner, we cleaned up the dishes and went into the living room to watch TV. There was a good movie on that we had looked forward to watching. Just as I was getting settled on the couch, Matt asked if it would bother me if he changed his clothes. I looked at him as if to say, "why would changing your clothes bother me?" But all I said was "no problem, Matthew." His face lights up every time I call him Matthew.

When he came back from his bedroom, I found out what he meant. He hadn't really changed clothes. He'd just stripped down to his jockey briefs. Gosh, did he look good. I love his hairless little body. Maybe because it's so much like mine. Whatever. He wasn't hard, but I could still see the bumps in his underwear. I love briefs, just for that reason. You can't see as much in boxers unless a guy's got a boner. Anyway, as soon as he sat down, I excused myself and went to the bathroom. When I got back to the living room, I was dressed the same way he was. But I was getting a bit of a boner just thinking about being almost naked with him.

I think if I didn't love Matthew for who he is and what he is, I'd love him for his body. He isn't buff with all sorts of muscles, but he is darn cute. He's thin, like me, but not so skinny he looks funny or bad. To me he looks great. Sometimes I wonder if I will get as excited looking at Nancy's tits as I do looking at Matthew's chest. Will Nancy's tummy be as attractive as Matthew's?

Anyway, when I got back, Matthew was stretched out on the couch, ready to watch the movie. I laid down between him and the back of the couch, my head on a little pillow next to his. I began to get harder as I felt my crotch nestle against his thigh. I'm happy to say that Matthew must have noticed, because I saw the bump in his briefs start getting bigger. Gosh, is that hot, or what, watching Matthew get hard in his shorts. I think he must have enjoyed knowing I was watching, because he sure didn't do anything to try to hide it, and once in a while he moved his thigh against my own hardon.

I started rubbing my hand over his chest and tummy and up and down the side of his rib cage. That lasted until about the third commercial, us laying there like that, me rubbing him and him kissing me once in a while. Finally, I think we both lost interest in the movie. I was rubbing his tummy, sliding my little finger under the waistband of his briefs, watching his penis throb and wanting to go further. Finally I asked him.

"Matthew?" I said.

"Yeah?" he said.

"Can I touch you there?" I asked in a whisper.

"Yeah." he answered almost without breathing.

I had often fantasized about this moment. In my fantasies I'd move my hand down past his crotch to his thigh, teasing him for a while. But when the time came to really do it, I couldn't. I just moved my hand from his tummy right down onto his hard penis, throbbing in his underwear. I thought he was going to choke, he gasped so hard. I guess it must have felt good to him too. I know his penis felt a lot different to me than Wayne's had the night Wayne and I fooled around. I remember thinking to myself, "Is this what love is all about?"

I'm sure we both forgot about the movie on television. I know I did. I couldn't get over how playing with Matthew's cloth covered penis made me feel. I was sort of sad and glad all at the same time. Warm and sappy. Relaxed. Comfortable. I just laid there with my head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat and softly rubbing his penis, still in his briefs. It had been a while since that time we watched each other take a bath, and I wanted to see it, but I didn't want to see it. I ached to push his shorts down and gaze on it, but I wanted to wait, put it off, let the anticipation build up. I wanted to make love to him with just my hand. I wanted to tell him how special he was without having to use words. And I think he was enjoying it, too, because his breathing got really heavy and rapid. Every once in a while, he'd push his penis into my hand real hard and stop breathing for a few seconds. Then he'd collapse back onto the couch. I even forgot about my own hardon for a while, although I know it was still there, pressing against Matthew's thigh.

When I'd raise my head to look at his face, I'd see his eyes closed, but then he'd open them and just smile at me with this most beautiful smile. Along the way somewhere, he dropped his hand down from behind his head and started rubbing my back, real slow and gentle-like. And he'd moan once in a while, too, softly, almost like just a heavy breath or sigh.

Eventually I couldn't put it off any longer. I had to see him and feel him, that part of him that Dad Dan called our "itty-bitty parts." Of course, I knew by then that his wasn't "itty-bitty", but it wasn't huge either. I started by rubbing the smooth skin of his tummy along the waistband of his briefs. Then I slipped my fingers under the band and inched my way slowly down towards his penis. It was lying flat on his stomach, held down by his undershorts, and I felt it on the back of my fingers as I played with the little bush of hair he had at the base. Then I slid my hand down to cup his balls. Wow! Did they feel good in my hand. Warm and soft. Hairless and wonderful. Each one about the size of a pecan.

After a few minutes of massaging his balls, I slowly inched my hand up along his sack and onto his rock-hard penis. I could hardly believe how wonderful it felt, so much different from my own. It was fun feeling him and forming a picture in my mind of what he would look like when I finally uncovered him. And it was hot, too! And throbbing. I was really happy to find out his bush was small and sparse, just like mine.

For the longest time, I just held his penis in my hand, squeezing it softly about once minute. Then I started pushing his underwear down. I know he was eager for me to see him, because he started helping. He raised his butt off the couch and pushed on the left side of his briefs as I pushed on the right. Soon, his penis was out in the open, the hole in the end almost blinking with the throbbing of his heartbeat, like a fish out of water.

Then his ballsac appeared. Gosh! I couldn't believe how beautiful it was. I know I stopped breathing for a while. It seemed like minutes, but I know it was only seconds. When we had his shorts down far enough, he raised his legs and used his feet to push them the rest of the way off. Finally!

Matthew was completely naked! And he was so beautiful. His skin was so smooth, and his groin was beyond words. I know "pretty" isn't a word used with boys, but that's the only word for it. His penis was the prettiest thing I had ever seen. The head was sort of pointed, and the shaft was just a little thicker than my dad's thumb, maybe 3/4 of an inch thick, maybe less. I almost choked on my own spit as I thought about how much I wanted to feel him in my mouth. I wanted to suck on his penis and make him cum. I wanted to feel his juice shooting across my tongue and taste it.

I wanted it to happen. I ached to make it happen, to make him feel so good, to tell him in that special way how much he meant to me.

As I lay there playing with his naked penis, reveling in the feel of it in my hand and marveling at the beauty of it and its companions, I wondered if I dared just suck him without asking. On the one hand, I wasn't sure he was ready for that. On the other, I didn't want to spoil the moment by having to speak. In the end, I decided not to. I wanted our sexual experiences to come slowly. After all, his penis was just a few inches in front of my face, and it felt so wonderful in my hand. Why rush into something more? Why not enjoy playing with him and feeling his beautiful penis in my hand? There would be plenty of time to taste him later.

Besides, I wanted to see him cum. I always got a kick out of seeing my own penis spew forth, surely Matthew's would be just as exciting if not more so.

So I just continued stroking him softly, sometimes gripping him tightly and sliding his skin up and down on the hard shaft, but mostly just letting my hand slide loosely over the skin, up over his head and down around his balls. His balls, so perfect. Small, hairless, beautiful. I ached to suck them, take them into my mouth and pretend they were candy. But I forced myself not to. I had decided to wait.

All the time I played with his penis, he was stroking my back lightly and moaning softly. Once in a while he'd lift his head just a bit and kiss the top of my head. I still didn't know if I was gay, but I didn't care. Gay, bi or straight, I loved Matthew, and I loved looking at and playing with his penis.

Eventually I could tell that Matthew needed to cum. He started to hump his hips into the air and moan almost constantly, and I could feel him exercise the muscles that made his penis swell in my hand. I tightened my grip just enough to make the skin move on the shaft within and sped up my strokes. As he got closer, his breathing became faster and louder, and he started moaning my name.

"Oh, God, Tommy. I'm getting close. Oh, Oh, Oh, Tommy, I'm gonna cum. God, I can't believe how wonderful this feels, so much better than doing it myself. Tommy, here it cums!"

I slid my head back a few inches so I could see better and watched the cum slit in the head of his penis closely. Then all of a sudden he was shooting. Man it was so awesome! The first shot hit me in the face, right on my upper lip, a big glob. The rest of it, about three shots, landed on his tummy right in front of my face. I grabbed the opportunity to taste his special juices and licked his cum from where his first shot had landed on my lips. I knew from my own experiences with masturbation that his penis would be getting sensitive, so I slowed down my strokes and eventually just squeezed his beautiful penis gently. It made me feel more special than I can describe, just knowing that I was the only one Matthew would allow to do this to, with and for him.

We fell asleep like that, my head on his chest, his penis in my hand, his hand on my back. I said a short prayer just before I dozed off. "Thank you, God, for Matthew."

I woke up to find some vegamatic-type program was on. At first, I couldn't identify what had awakened me. Then in a flash of panic, I realized it was the garage door going up. I slapped Matthew on the tummy and yelled at him to wake up. We scrambled to get his underwear back on and had just settled back on the couch and turned the TV to CNN when his mom and dad walked into the TV room from the kitchen.

They didn't seem to mind us sitting there in just our underwear. His mom said hi and went on into her bedroom. His dad asked us how our evening had gone and then ushered us off to bed as he turned off the TV and turned out the lights. We were both so tired we just slipped out of our briefs and crawled into bed. In minutes I was asleep, wrapped in Matthew's arms.