Primary Target - 3. Chapter 3

Both of us were eerily quiet on the way home. Conner took the most direct route – he didn’t want to chance getting in the crossfire with Bates and his fellows. If he wouldn’t have, I’d screamed at him to do it. I was too scared to be out of the house right now. I wanted the safety of our new house to shield me from this horrible feeling.

He pulled into the garage and I waited until the door closed before I exited the vehicle and even then, I sprinted from the car door to the door in the garage leading inside. I burst through and almost took out Dad.

“Hey, where’s the fire?” he lightly laughed. I latched onto him tightly and more tears started pouring out of me. “Alex, what’s wrong?” Dad pushed me away just enough and made me look at him. His eyes narrowed. “What happened to your neck?” I brought a hand to my throat, where the blade pressed very uncomfortably into my skin. Sure enough, a small scab formed and the surrounding area felt caked with some dried blood on my neck – the tip must have nicked the skin. I said nothing as I shook free from his interrogative stare and buried my face into his torso again. I heard the garage door to the house open again.

“Hey Dad,” Conner barely mumbled.

“What the hell happened at the mall?” Dad’s voice rose, bordering on anger. “I want answers, now.”

Conner gave a one sentence description. “Someone at the mall almost…k-killed him, Dad.” I heard my brother slump to his knees in defeat. “I-I couldn’t do a-anything to help either, Dad!”

“N-No, it was my f-fault, Conner,” I spoke. “I-I didn’t follow you like I w-was supposed to.” I let go of Dad and knelt next to my brother. “You did m-more than I did.”

“Doesn’t matter if I would’ve lost you too, Alex,” he somberly said.

“Alright, details now please. Either one of you, let’s go.” Conner and I took turns offering up our perspectives of how things went down, all the while Dad’s frown deepening with each word.

“God damn it!” he swore as he slammed his fists into the counter, his current location in the kitchen. He took a deep breath before he looked at me. “Did you admit to being gay to these kids or did they just assume?”

“I said nothing to them, I swear!” I nearly shouted, almost becoming defensive. “Conner and I were talking about dates – and that’s the exact word he used each time he talked to me about it!” Dad was starting to get on my nerves. It was like he started to make it like I begged to be gutted and filleted in that food court.

He sighed. “Alex…” I turned my back to him. He started to piss me off more somehow. “Son, you know what I meant, right? I wasn’t accusing you, I swear. I’m just trying to understand everything.”

“Whatever,” I said bitterly, feeling a bit hurt at the same time. “I’m going to my room.”

“My dad’s being a real jerk right now,” I spoke into the phone. “It’s like…I don’t know.” I sighed. “I felt like he was saying I jumped on the kid’s lap and started grinding into him. He made me feel like a slut or something.”

“Xan, you’re reading way too much into this, bro.”

“You’re probably right, Jared.” I pinched my nose directly between my eyes. “I really wish I could just come over like I used to and hang out. This whole distance thing sucks.”

“Yeah, bro. All of the guys ask about you a lot.”

“Tell them all I said hi next time you see them and that I miss all of them.”

I heard a pause on the phone before my best friend said, “I’m really sorry about what you told me. If we were all there, it never would’ve happened. I just… can’t believe some people, you know? You have the right to love someone too – even if it happens to be a boy. I… just don’t get hurt out there, Xan, okay? I don’t want to have to get that call from your father or brother. You might hate me for saying this, but maybe… you should go back into the closet for a little. Let people get to know you a little and then tell them.”

“But Jared,” I complained. “I can’t base any relationship, be it even friendship on hiding who I am now! I’d be lying to them and mostly, to myself. I… I can’t do that. I told my dad I wasn’t going to flaunt my sexuality, but if asked I’m going to tell them the truth. I shouldn’t be ashamed of who I am.”

I heard my friend sigh. “You’re both right and wrong here, Alex. Just… be careful. Please.” He paused again. “Look, I have to go. If I can, I’ll call you later. Keep your head up, dude.”

“Later Jared and, thanks for talking with me. I really do miss you.” I smirked half-heartedly, feeling almost broken-hearted as I thought of the next thing to say. “And…I love you.”

He laughed. “Of course you do. Later.” I hung up the phone and lay back down into my bed.

A knock on my door startled me as I realized I woke up from an unplanned nap. I sat up and saw Conner entering my room. “Oh, I didn’t realize you were taking a nap. I can come back…”

“Conner, you’re fine. I’m up already and it’ll bug me to know what you wanted. So what’s up?” My brother walked softly across the room and sat at the end of my bed. He looked at me with wistful eyes, almost like I was a ghost or something. “Conner… you’re creeping me out with that stare…”

“Sorry,” he said somewhat absentmindedly. He shook his head a few times and snapped himself out of his trance. His eyes were back to normal and not trying to bore a hole in me the size of the Grand Canyon. “So, I just wanted to see how you were doing and wanted to see if you were up for some games if you’re okay.”

“Conner, I’m still a bit shaken up about this – I wouldn’t be surprised if you are too. But the game sounds good… it’ll help us normalize a bit more hopefully. What’d you have in mind?”

“It’s a surprise, just c’mon.” He jumped up and clapped his hands once, making me flinch.

I frowned. “Surprises are not something I’m up for tonight – I’ve had my share at the mall, thank you very much.”

Worry flowed over his face. “Oh yeah, I didn’t think about it like that. Shit, sorry Alex.” Just as Conner spoke up about the game, his cell phone interrupted him by way of a beep for an incoming text message. He sheepishly looked at me as he looked at his phone. He read the text and I couldn’t read his eyes.

“What’s up Conner?” I asked, sitting up to get a better look at my brother.

“N-Nothing… just that… it was from that Evan guy.” I froze. What the hell does that guy want? I’m really happy he decided to step in and all to save me, but I still really got an uneasy feeling about hearing his name again. To be honest, I really wished it all would just go away. Conner tapped my leg, getting my attention. “He just wanted to see if you were doing okay is all. I told him you were fine.” Another message came across when something came to me.

“Wait, how’d he get your number? We just moved here and I don’t think he’s your type. Hell, he’s not my type.” I shuddered. Just then, the landline phone next to my bed started to ring. I snatched the receiver and picked it up. “Hello?”

“Hey, it’s Jar-head again. Dude, what happened to your cell? I just called it, but some weird guy answered. Somewhat nice, but weird still.” I felt my eyes grow large. “Xan, you still there?”

“Y-Yeah, still h-here.”

“What’s wrong? Don’t tell me that bastard that tried to cut you up has it?!”

Conner shoved his phone in my face, a text message displayed. It read, “You might want to bring your brother with you back to the mall parking lot – I have his phone. Come by nine if you can. Text back if that doesn’t work.” Fuck! Fuck me! I screamed in my head. I remembered then; I had my phone on the table while Conner and I ate our pizza. It dug into my sides while in my pocket so I pulled it out and set it there. Then Bates and his flunkies tried to kill me and in my hurry to get out of the mall, I totally forgot I didn’t have it. It also explains how Evan got Conner’s number.

“Shit, Jared, I think I need to go. I know who has my phone, but it’s not the guy that tried to cut me up – in fact, it’s the guy that stopped it all.”

“Really?” I heard Jared thinking across the line. “Well, I still think that guy’s creepy. Be careful as I assume you’re going to go get it?”

“I-I almost have to!” I blurted out. “I used that phone to store all the email addresses from all the guys and gals of our circle! I didn’t have time to plug them into my laptop yet. Damn it! And I was hoping I was done with this shit…” I grabbed at my hair in frustration.

“Dude, let go of your hair – you’re going to go bald by twenty-two if you keep it up.” I laughed as I let go, dropping my free hand to my side. I glanced at my desk clock – one of the few things I’ve unpacked so far. It read eight forty-two. Damn! If we left now, we could make it back to the mall by nine.

“Jared, I really have to go. Evan wants to meet to give me my phone back at nine and it’s about a fifteen minute drive to the mall. I’ll have Conner call you if things go south for me.” I laughed a bit, hoping Jared knew I was trying to make light of this whole ordeal.

“Maybe you can get lucky and this ‘Evan’ will let you go south of his border,” Jared said. I heard the smirk through the phone. The tone changed from joking to seriousness in a second, the smirk in his voice gone. “Again, Xan... be safe with this. Alright? I’ll talk to you soon. Later.”

“Later.”

Conner slid into the nearly empty parking lot of the mall. I immediately felt uneasy – I figured the mall would be a good neutral point for this sort of thing. I looked at my older sibling – he seemed tense. Conner pulled his phone out as we exited the SUV, texting Evan I assumed, letting him know we’re here.

He slid his phone into his shirt pocket. “Stay behind me, or at least near enough I can grab at you in case I see things going bad. Evan seems like he could be a nice enough fellow, but he gives me bad vibes.”

“I know,” I muttered.

A car pulled up two spaces away from us, a Honda decked out and pampered. It had a custom paint job, chrome spinners and sat lower to the ground than a normal Honda. The door opened and out strolled Evan. He was alone, and I sighed immensely. I really expected to see his friends with him, outnumbering us easily. At least now, we had an advantage – if I had the courage to help Conner out.

“Good, you two were right on time. Look familiar?” He reached into his pocket and fished out what appeared to be my phone. He approached us, my phone extended towards me. Shakily, I reached for it and lightly grasped it. I expected him to let go; he didn’t. I tugged a bit harder, but his steel grip held firm. “Relax, little one. Before I give this back to you, I want you to answer me one question, maybe some more if you’re willing. Is that fair?” He seemed very composed and I actually took a good look at him for the first time – earlier, I was scared shitless to even fully take him in.

He was big. Not big as in fat, big as in “I can bench-press a truck” big. Thick shoulders supported his tree-trunk sized arms, but his height made it all work for him – he didn’t look trollish. Evan had a nice tan and a friendly enough smile on his face, revealing his perfect teeth. A light breeze played with his medium-length light brown hair that seemed to want to curl, but didn’t really – just at the ends. He stared into my eyes, his eyes almost the color of graphite. They expressed a sincerity I swore I didn’t feel from the smile.

“Okay,” I said hesitantly. “But turnabout’s fair play – every question I answer of yours lets me ask one either now or later – I assume this won’t be the last time I bump into you. I’ll answer honestly and I expect you to do the same.”

“Alright,” he said as he released his grip on my phone. His hands slid into the pockets of his dark-washed designer jeans. “First question: are you gay?”

I smirked a bit, almost expecting this question at some point. “One hundred percent. Not the limp-wristed variety, but gay nonetheless. My question: why’d you want to know?”

“Bates seems to only get that agitated around folks like you if he spots the signals that qualify one as gay in his mind. Some of the ones I knows he judges by is size of the person, regardless of age and how easy they are to bully. So, I just wanted to see if he was actually right for once, the fucker. I’ve seen him use that routine he used on you today a few times before. I was surprised you managed to avoid the knife.” He paused. “Oh and here’s a free answer: no, I’m not gay. Totally straight.”

I mentally chuckled at the answer to my unasked question. “I saw it and alerted Conner to a bad deal going down under the table.”

Evan walked over and leaned against our Santa Fe. Conner paced around, staying on patrol, eyeing the situation between me and Evan carefully. Knowing he could hear him, Evan said, “I like your brother – very protective of you. He hasn’t relaxed since I left my car. Good instincts to have – even if the situation doesn’t call for it.”

“Well, almost losing his brother today tends to make one acutely aware of danger, especially in an empty mall parking lot.”

“I’ll give you that. I have another question: have you ever been in love?”

“What?” I asked, totally blindsided by this query. “What kind of question is that?”

Evan smiled again. “Just getting to know you. Hell, come to think of it, I don’t even think I was told your name earlier.”

I thought it over, pacing opposite Conner but at a slower pace than my brother. I mentally shrugged. I already told him I was gay – that’s usually the death card in these types of scenarios. I had something to stall with a bit. “I just realized you never really answered my first question – you seemed to skirt around a bit, like there’s more to it than what you let on. I’ll answer your recently posed question if you elaborate on the first one a bit more.” I paused. “Oh and free answer: my name’s Xander Jacobs.”

“Xander, huh? Interesting name, but I like it. Short for Alexander?” I nodded. “I like the creativity in going with the last half of it instead of the first.”

“Not too terribly creative, I think,” I chuckled. “It really stemmed from the fact I had another Alex in my class last year. So to avoid confusion I went with Xander or Xan to shorten it more.”

Evan pushed off our car and strolled around a bit. “The real reason I asked about your orientation really stems from the fact that my baby brother’s also gay. But he’s also dead.”

The way he said it with no emotion almost slapped me to the ground. He had a gay brother, but his was killed? I bet the reason behind the stony voice as he mentioned this fact was that he really cared for his brother but is still pained by it so he buries the pain under the weight of the stone.

“How?” Conner asked, speaking after nearly ten minutes of silence from him.

“Kyle was about Xander’s age. Bates somehow intrigued him and after a few things led to another, Kyle was outed at school. He saw the attraction Kyle had towards him and used it to his advantage. He seemed like a nice guy at the time – I didn’t really press too hard. But I should have. Kyle went over to his house and spiked his food – he made my brother French fries cooked in peanut oil. Kyle was deathly allergic to anything peanut related. He had no chance and Bates got off scot-free as my brother’s death was ruled an accident and it all went under the rug.” His eyes locked to the ground as he recounted this all but at the end, he brought them up and locked them with mine; I could see the stone crumbling. “I saw you today at the mall and you reminded me of my little brother for some reason; I nearly fainted. I pointed you out to the four friends with me and they saw it too. But one of them saw Bates and his crew eyeing you up and heading towards you when I dropped what I was doing to intervene.”

“I… I’m sorry to hear about your little brother, Kyle,” I said, unsure of what else to say. I noticed Conner’s vigilant pacing and hawk-like stare eased a bit. “How did you end up even meeting Bates? Sounds like he’s slime on the bottom of shit stuck to your shoe. And what was with that Rule Three shit?”

He laughed a little, a bit of spark coming back to his eyes. “That he is. I met him one day a few years back – someone sent him my way. You see, sometimes I slide certain people some legal Intel on some things and Bates wanted introduced to those people.”

“You mean a gang?” I really didn’t want to know what kind of intelligence he gathered for the local mob. The less I knew about that world, the better.

He tapped his nose. “In exchange for my information, they leave me and anyone I ask them to alone. Bates ended up on the crew in that happy little family that’s highly resentful of homosexuals. So much so, he wants to see them all die. Painfully if it can be managed. I found this out when my informant let it slip about how he did some fag in to complete his membership or something and Kyle had just recently been outed around the same time. I asked, almost demanded, protection of all known gay people and the leader said he would make it happen. Of course we argued for about an hour and I simply just threatened to take all I knew to the cops if my request wasn’t considered heavily. Before the new order could take effect, Bates slid in and offed Kyle. I almost quit being their intelligence officer, but I decided not to. I figured I could use my leverage and keep up the protection detail – at least from that small group. So since Bates is a part of that group, I can somewhat control him and I love every minute of it.”

“So… you wanted to know my orientation so you can protect me and that something bad will happen to Bates if something happens to me now since you know? Do I understand all this correctly?”

“You, little one, are very smart,” Evan smiled. “All that Third Rule stuff was things that I knew would get him to back down for now.”

I rubbed my temples. “Is there anything else? I want to go home and lie down some more. I swear, Vermont gives me a headache the size of Ohio.” Evan laughed.

“Okay, you can go. I put my number into your phone. If you see Bates anywhere, let me know. I’ll step in and if I have to, I’ll gladly break every bone in his body and consider it payback for what he did to my brother Kyle.” He walked past me and ruffled my hair as he climbed into his Civic and peeled out of the mall’s parking lot.