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You have the Power

Billy Martin


Life can sometimes seem like you are just barely holding on to a thin weak string. Having a hard enough time that you are just getting through life one day at a time, and can't see a reason why to plan your life any further than one day at a time. But the truth is, nothing lasts forever, including bad times.


I have had my share of things gone wrong. At 15, I realized I was more interested in guys and their bodies than girls. This lead me to getting caught sneaking a peek at a high school sports star taking a leak. Which lead to me becoming his personal sex slave over that summer. I had mixed emotions about the whole thing, but I was getting what I wanted from him, sex. But everything was totally for his pleasure, none for me. He used blackmail to keep me under his control, but in the end I think he was more afraid of me than I was of him. Nevertheless, that too passed. So the summer of blackmail was over and on to a new beginning with the new school year.


But, it wasn't a few weeks before I was informed that I had an aggressive form of leukemia A.L.L.. That in and of itself is unusual because mostly adults have the ALL form. Yet, my parents, doctors, and friends all expected me to beat it, and so far I have with a few relapses. But for whatever reason, I had side effects and tumors. It seems my body likes to grow them. I've lost my voice box, a kidney, and part of my liver. Yet, here I am.


I always try to look at things through other people's eyes. I know that I haven't had an easy life so far medically, but my life has been blessed. It's the starving children in Africa, the Middle East, the Far East, that have it a lot worse than I do. How can I, with a straight face, complain about my life when so many go to bed with hunger pains. How can I complain about all the doctors I've had to see over the last 12 years when some kids will never see a doctor. How can I complain about not getting another car yet when some kids today will never own a car or ride in one.


It has been said that this country is becoming a country of victims. I refuse to be a victim. Every day is a new beginning. Every day you walk out your door, you are choosing the path you walk. You alone have control over what you say and do with others. You should be the only one that has control over your emotions and thoughts. So it's only you that chooses to smile or not. A smile can go a long way in making a difference in not only your life, but others as well.


Because of my illness, I do tend to live life one day at a time, but I do have plans for my future. I intend to go to the University of Kentucky, against my Dad's wishes (He wants me to go to Virginia where he went), but he knows my love of Kentucky basketball and thinks I'll return home to Virginia for Law School. We'll see.


I hope each of you that read this get something good from it. Life is a wonderful experience even with the bad stuff that happens. We surely can over come the barriers placed in front of us, or be smart enough to learn a way around them. The bottom line is, life is what you make of it. If you choose to be a victim, that's what you'll be. But if you choose to live life as best you can, you can be a happy person with control over life. So smile, because you have the power.

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Those are wise words from someone so young, Billy. I admire your attitude and your outlook on life. I will be praying for you.

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Words non only wise, but also wonderfull . I admire the young man you are now, but I'm sure I will admire even more the mature man you will be in 20 years.

Good luck for your future


My wishes come from an old man who experienced the power you show in your blog

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Well, you may not have a voice box but you certainly have a voice. Good for you for refusing to be a victim. Take care of yourself and keep on fighting.

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