a bit of contemplation
Okay, I'm gonna talk about something serious for once. My mom has a relative who is only expected to live a few more days. I don't really know her, and I'm not even sure how we're related, but the whole situation is really bothering me for a reason that I think makes for a good discussion. The relative has pretty much given up at this point, and is refusing to eat or take medication, because she's ready to get to the "other side" and see her husband. Now, I don't believe in an other side, and I also haven't lived for 70-some years or whatever, so I'm altogether unable to accept this. At any rate, this isn't the actual point of my little rant here, but it did start me thinking. I heard a lot of the "he's in a better place now" stuff when my grandfather died a few years ago, and to tell you the truth it really pissed me off. These people sure weren't comforting me, and I don't think they were really all that concerned about the emotional state of my grandfather's spirit-they were trying to make themselves feel better. Is living with pain or loss of mental and phsyical abilities worse for the afflicted, or those who have to watch it? Which party is death more merciful for? My grandfather had some very bad days toward the end, but I think he had some good ones too. There were days when he knew who we were, and days when he was completely confused and thought he was fishing on a riverbank somewhere, which happened to be his favorite thing in the world, so is that really so bad? It was painful to watch, but in his mind, was he happy? Who are we to judge the quality of a single minute of someone else's life? When I was younger, and I would start wishing sometime in October that it would hurry up and be Christmas, my grandfather would tell me not to wish away days of my life. Maybe it's just naivete, but I have trouble believing that same man would believe it was all for the best if we just let him go quietly. Of course, I'm not rude enough to say any of this to the droves of people telling me it's all for the best, but now you all know what I'm really thinking.
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