Drew Payne

Oh spoilers, spoilers. I'm writing the next chapter now, and it's set at the end of the same day that the first chapter starts on. I want to bring it full circle. I want to show how poor Liam's life has become after his release.

What a horrible case and I'm afraid not uncommon. A friend of mine worked in Child Protection for some years. The cases she dealt with scared me. I really admired her for doing so but I also knew that I could never do that work. You are right, people like Donna only get fired if they are involved in a very public event. Of course, they could find themselves fictionalised (only slightly) in an online serialised story. Shame the "inspiration" for Donna will probably never read this.

Donna isn't treating Liam worse than anyone else she doesn't like/approve of. She treats everyone she considers beneath her, and these are many people, in the same way - the worst way possible. The nurses know all about her but there is nothing they can do about her. The nurses are employed by the hospital and Donna is employed by the local probation service. The nurses can complain about her but that's all. And, from my own experience, it is very difficult to get rid of an employee like Donna. The best thing to do is make their life uncomfortable and hope they go and find a new job. Its a horrible attitude but it can be a nightmare trying to dismiss someone who knows how to play the system. But I am so happy people dislike Donna so much; it does me a lot of good.

Unfortunately, we don't have Homeowners Associations here in Britain; the Donnas have to find other professionals to hate everyone else in. At first, many years ago, I wondered why this sort of person gravitated to healthcare here in Britain. Over the years, I realised that they like feeling important and needed. They also like looking down on their colleagues for being "taken in" by the patients/clients, when really they're just being judgemental. I hated them. I'm so glad people hate Donna so much, it means I caught her personality. Don't be sorry for hating her, she is a horrible person, she just thinks she's better than the rest of us.

Wow, thank you, you have nailed Donna's personality. She is a complete See-You-Next-Thursday, who thinks no one is as good or intelligent as her. As I said, I have worked with many Donna's (both male and female), and I could have happily poisoned all of them. They are toxic and you end up doing half of their work too because they are so incompetent. If you look back on the first chapter of this story, Liam is alone and is failing in his new life. I need to show the readers how he got there and Donna is one of the steps down to that place. I'm also pleased that people have taken against Donna, it means I've got her character right. It's easier to write characters people like.

I don't like Donna either, but she is all too common in health/social care. I based her on several people I have worked with over the years, but especially on someone I worked with back in the mid-1990s. She had that same bumper sticker on her car. Unfortunately, people like Donna are all too real in our world. Liam has had a very protected life, at Nurton Cross, but Donna is a confrontation with the world outside.

Liam looked down at his bags lined up on his bed. His clothes were packed away in four dark grey, thick plastic bags that Pearl had given him. His old essays and the other things he’d saved from his studies, plus the five books he wanted to take with him, were packed away in a duffel bag he found in a second-hand shop months ago. His personal paperwork, the money he had been given as his “tide-over” benefits and the book he was reading were inside his leather satchel, another second-hand shop fi

Are you in London? Are you free on Saturday 26th September? Do you want to come to a free event? Would you like to hear some new and different writing? My writers group, Newham Writers Workshop, is celebrating its 40th Anniversary, which is a milestone for any writing group, and we’re organising a spoken word afternoon to celebrate it. It’ll be on Saturday 26th September, 3.00 pm to 5.00 pm, at the Stratford Library (3 The Grove, London E15 1EL). There’ll be lots of writers reading from their work, including me, cake and drinks, the launch of our book Showtime: 40th Anniversary Edition and a bookstall selling books associated with Newham Writers Workshop, including mine. Showtime: 40th Anniversary Edition includes my short story Three Stops on the Journey. It would be great to see you there. You can book a place here.

Thanks for the feedback. I want to assure you that I haven’t forgotten this story’s first chapter and where Liam was. This story is coming to an end and I know what that route will be. I’m glad that you liked what Pearl said to Liam. When she talks about not calling people monsters, because you negate the role their society and upbringing played in their crimes, is what I feel. I hate it when the media calls someone a “monster”, they are ignoring the things that drive that person to their crimes. A criminal is made by the world around them. (Yes, I’ve studied sociology) Pearl is based on a woman I worked with. She had a strong Christian faith and yet didn’t have a prejudiced bone in her body. She and my husband got on so well. In my teens and twenties, I tried to be a Christian, but I got involved in Evangelical Christianity. In the heart of the bible is the story of Jonathan and David, and it struck me so hard that this was a gay love story. When they met, there was a strong bond between them; they made a vow to each other and they wore each other’s clothes. That certainly sounds like lovers to me. When Jonathan was killed in battle, David was broken by this. This story, right there in the bible, gave me a sharp of hope as I faced so much Christian homophobia. Over thirty years ago, I heard an elderly woman call a gay couple “Jonathan and David”, and the name stuck with me. While writing this story, there have been a great many changes in my life; I’m not in the same place as when I started it, which has impacted the pace at which I write it. But I need to finish it, move the characters on and start something new. Unfortunately, other things keep getting in the way of me doing that.

He's leaving home, and that is always hard for anyone, but with Liam's history... I wouldn't like to be doing what he is at nineteen.

Nurton Cross has been his best home, which is a terrible indictment on his life, but he can't stay there forever. We know how his day began, back in Chapter One, but that day still hasn't ended. Wait for the last chapter.

@CincyKrisYes, Liam is scared. He's leaving the best home he has known (which is a terrible thing to say because he's been living in a high-security hospital for seven years), and he doesn't want to go, but he can't stay. Everything goes wrong in his first month outside of there. I've dropped references, in the present-day chapters, about what has gone wrong, but all of your points will be explained, and what Liam's future too.

Liam sat on the bench, in the hospital’s garden. The weather was warm and comfortable he could sit out there in only his jeans and a shirt. It was Thursday afternoon and he was due to leave here on Monday, there was no going back now, but there was also nothing for him to do. Donna had cancelled her meeting with him on Tuesday by sending a message that she didn’t need to see him again. All his paperwork was signed. Her message had arrived late. Liam lent back on the bench. This was the benc

Thank you so much for leaving this comment. I saw Bedrooms and Hallways at the cinema and have the video of it. It is a film I really enjoyed, it was about a world I recognised all too much, and it wasn't about another teenager coming out (which seemed to be most of the other gay films at the time). It also had a great cast. Plus, it has a great, quotable line in "I was just getting moist!" I will look out for your next book, and I'll check out your Substack.

I understand why people are frustrated that Liam doesn't stand up to Donna, but if Liam did that it would be so out of character. He's only 19, and for seven years he has led a very sheltered life. He is still a passive soul and defers to authority figures. Yes, he gave a very good description, during his Parole Broad hearing, of how he would deal with a bully in a workplace, but that was all head knowledge; he'd studied psychology. Look at how nervous and awkward he was during his Parole Broad hearing. I can't make Liam suddenly change his personality for no reason; that does not ring true. Him standing to Donna or causing problems around Donna's behaviour is still out of character for him, even at 19. It takes a lot to stand up to bullies, especially if you've been bullied in the past. Liam hasn't had enough experience to give him that confidence, that will come later in his life but not here. Also, this story starts in a very specific way, to change things now would change that opening, how is that being fair on readers? I need to show how Liam ended up in that mess. Donna's prejudice is part of how he ended up there, it's referenced at the beginning of this story. I know where this story is going to end. I promised a satisfying ending and that's what I'm going to deliver, but I don't want to say anymore.