I got called pitiful yesterday. It was in jest but I dunno, anything for the demons to latch on to ya know? The perpetrator is a regular customer. He buys lottery and a few weeks ago we were doing that 'what would you do?' shtick. I may have mentioned that I really have no need for massive sums of money, Just enough to be comfortable and stable and Ill be just fine. He was saying that he is going to buy a Ferrari.

Don't get me wrong, I love Ferrari and would love to drive one. I just can't justify spending $350,000 on one. No matter how much money I won playing the lottery. Rent one for the weekend? Sure I'd rent one for the week and have a grand time with it, but thats as far as it would go.

He insists that the Ferrari is key. matter of fact he has changed his mind, instead of winning the lottery himself he now wants me to win the lottery so he can "manage" me. He i9s convinced the Ferrari is key because it will get me laid. Yes the $350,000 car is for nothing more that attracting pussy and thus enabling me to "f**k till I DIE".

I dunno while the thought sounds appealing, I dunno I'd rather have people attracted to me for me, not for what I can do for them. He however swears that, that is beside the point. Its all about getting laid. then he asked how many times Ive been laid in the last year. How many girlfriends I had. If I just have one steady girlfriend.

I didn't correct him. Am I a closet case? perhaps. But, who I sleep with honestly isn't up for public debate, and peoples first impression of me shouldnt be clouded by the fact I like guys more than girls. Its stupid I guess and the wrong way to approach the subject.

I dunno maybe I should have told him yeah not gonna happen cause I prefer the cock.

Bleh it just sucks, I know he was joking. yet he said what I have been feeling and its kinda shitty in a way.

Steve