the sacred act...

[Tiger]

Well, If you really want to know the opinion of old folks on this subject, here some points, but I'm not sure the young idealists, with a lot a milk behind theirs ears (it's a French expression, that means young, very young), will appreciate it !

 

First, some researches in my Dictionary about the meaning of the expression "sacred act" :

"In religions sex is considered a sacred act of worship"

"Cooking is a Sacred Act among Middle-Eastern Jewish Women"

"Gardening is a sacred act, fulfilling our spiritual needs"

"The Sacred Act of Composting,a light-hearted yet spiritual look at my experience in composting"

If you are implying that the term sacred act was misused, I happen to agree. Sacred usually has religious implication. As for sex being a sacred act of worship, it is certainly worthy of such a distinction.

[cellArdore]

Well for me sex is 100% reserved for committed relationships only. Anything else (other than kissing) is, i guess, 80% theoretically in the same category too.

 

 

O no!! Bitter and jaded already? Sex isn't overrated and love certainly isn't. In fact love is probably underrated. ( I sound sappy)

 

 

I agree, but to me even kissing is something I don't want to experience outside a relationship.

 

There may be such a thing as a difference between "sex" and "love making" and it may be a way to differenciate between ONS or whatever and a loving relationship and to justify the first one.

But I'm only capable of "love making", so this distinction is of no interest to me.

 

- and for that matter there's no need of preservatives for me, since:

 

a ) neither me nor my partner (that is there to come) can get pregnant

 

b ) neither he nor me will have outside-relationship intercourses

 

oh, and in my opinion love is definitly underrated (just as a discussion like this one shows).

Where has all that romance, all that ~waiting 'til it's worth~ gone?

[Tiger]

I agree, but to me even kissing is something I don't want to experience outside a relationship.

 

There may be such a thing as a difference between "sex" and "love making" and it may be a way to differenciate between ONS or whatever and a loving relationship and to justify the first one.

But I'm only capable of "love making", so this distinction is of no interest to me.

 

- and for that matter there's no need of preservatives for me, since:

 

a ) neither me nor my partner (that is there to come) can get pregnant

 

b ) neither he nor me will have outside-relationship intercourses

 

oh, and in my opinion love is definitly underrated (just as a discussion like this one shows).

Where has all that romance, all that ~waiting 'til it's worth~ gone?

Sadly, some people only care about themselves. They think of sex as being all about them. They could care less about love and romance.

 

Personally, I don't take it quite the same level as you. I am just fine having sex with friends when I am not in a relationship. However, relationships are definitely preferred.

[FrenchCanadian]

Sadly, some people only care about themselves. They think of sex as being all about them. They could care less about love and romance.

 

Personally, I don't take it quite the same level as you. I am just fine having sex with friends when I am not in a relationship. However, relationships are definitely preferred.

 

CellArdore has a good point of view,, and I'm totally fine with those that will think the same way. Relationship has this special thing, the romance in it.

 

Tho I'll be more on Tiger's opinion,, sex with friends is perfectly fine when you're not in a relationship. Tho, I would never have one night stand,, when I have sex, I need to know the other guy, I need to know that I'll see him again or that at least we'll still keep in touch.

[cellArdore]

CellArdore has a good point of view,, and I'm totally fine with those that will think the same way. Relationship has this special thing, the romance in it.

 

Tho I'll be more on Tiger's opinion,, sex with friends is perfectly fine when you're not in a relationship. Tho, I would never have one night stand,, when I have sex, I need to know the other guy, I need to know that I'll see him again or that at least we'll still keep in touch.

 

Sadly, some people only care about themselves. They think of sex as being all about them. They could care less about love and romance.

 

Personally, I don't take it quite the same level as you. I am just fine having sex with friends when I am not in a relationship. However, relationships are definitely preferred.

 

wow thanks, that's actually the first time, I don't get mocked for thinking this way!

[Hylas]

old bob! woot!

 

LOL. Ye olde goat. Ok I found my own answer.

 

I'm still young, with all the hormones and stuff. While still a virgin, I'm definitely not a prude, and I do not aim to be a slut. Life's too short to waste on meaningless ideas of what's sacred and what's not. It's like dating, if you set too high a standard, you'll gather cobwebs before you know it. I think I'll just live life, enjoy what I can, be happy, make other people happy, find what little happiness there is and magnify it a thousandfold.

 

And of course, find love, even just once in my life. It will be enough.

 

Now someone slap me, I'm dreaming again. LOL

[Graeme]

wow thanks, that's actually the first time, I don't get mocked for thinking this way!

Why should you get mocked? You're not alone with those views

 

However, I remember reading a story about a woman who was still single at forty. She made the comment that the view of "waiting until you're married" has the collorary that if you don't find the right one, expect to die a virgin.... That was the point where she was having reservations about the idea of waiting until she was married before she had sex.

 

This is not a simply area and to expect there to be one answer that fits everyone is unrealistic. cellArdore has a legitimate and admirable approach to the situation. I wish him all the luck and I don't think I'm being unreasonable in that I expect him to find someone who fits his criteria. The sort of person he's looking for is the sort of person who'll be looking for him in return

[FrenchCanadian]

wow thanks, that's actually the first time, I don't get mocked for thinking this way!

 

It's not that I don't follow the same mentality as you that I would mock someone that think that way, someone that still give importance on the act just like you do.

 

Like I said, I may be more open,, but I do have a limit, I need to feel some kind of minimum relationship (i.e. at least friend) to have sex...

[AFriendlyFace]

Personally, I don't take it quite the same level as you. I am just fine having sex with friends when I am not in a relationship.

 

Tho I'll be more on Tiger's opinion,, sex with friends is perfectly fine when you're not in a relationship.

 

Like I said, I may be more open,, but I do have a limit, I need to feel some kind of minimum relationship (i.e. at least friend) to have sex...

 

Sex with friends? Really?

 

I would never have sex with my friends! They mean way too much to me to risk complicating the relationship with something like sex. Plus I just don't really think about them in that way (even the really cute ones ).

 

I could imagine becoming friends with someone I was having sex with, but if that did happen I would expect that either the sex would eventually stop or we'd move into an actual relationship.

 

I'm just not into the whole "friendcest" thing.

 

old bob! woot!

 

LOL. Ye olde goat. Ok I found my own answer.

 

I'm still young, with all the hormones and stuff. While still a virgin, I'm definitely not a prude, and I do not aim to be a slut. Life's too short to waste on meaningless ideas of what's sacred and what's not. It's like dating, if you set too high a standard, you'll gather cobwebs before you know it. I think I'll just live life, enjoy what I can, be happy, make other people happy, find what little happiness there is and magnify it a thousandfold.

 

And of course, find love, even just once in my life. It will be enough.

 

Now someone slap me, I'm dreaming again. LOL

That's an excellent position to take, Hylas

 

I agree, but to me even kissing is something I don't want to experience outside a relationship.

 

There may be such a thing as a difference between "sex" and "love making" and it may be a way to differenciate between ONS or whatever and a loving relationship and to justify the first one.

But I'm only capable of "love making", so this distinction is of no interest to me.

 

- and for that matter there's no need of preservatives for me, since:

 

a ) neither me nor my partner (that is there to come) can get pregnant

 

b ) neither he nor me will have outside-relationship intercourses

 

oh, and in my opinion love is definitly underrated (just as a discussion like this one shows).

Where has all that romance, all that ~waiting 'til it's worth~ gone?

 

Well that's very romantic and I really really hope it works out for you

 

I will say this though your indication that condoms won't be necessary because you'll both be faithful is...troubling. Romantic no doubt, but first off you never know what he'll be bringing into the relationship when you guys first get together, and second regardless of how much you trust him or how faithful you are, it doesn't mean he won't "slip up" and bring home something bad.

 

It's easy to say that won't ever happen, but that's what most people in a committed relationship that get cheated on think. So I would urge more caution.

 

 

Good luck though

 

-Kevin

[FrenchCanadian]

 

Sex with friends? Really?

 

I would never have sex with my friends! They mean way too much to me to risk complicating the relationship with something like sex. Plus I just don't really think about them in that way (even the really cute ones ).

 

I could imagine becoming friends with someone I was having sex with, but if that did happen I would expect that either the sex would eventually stop or we'd move into an actual relationship.

 

I'm just not into the whole "friendcest" thing.

 

-Kevin

 

Well, yes, it can complicate the relationship, that's for sure, and there's lots to risk on that.

 

But what I meant here, is that I don't have sex with people that wouldn't be my friend at least. I don't like and don't want one night stands... I want to know that I'll still able to talk to the guy, after even if I don't have sex with the guy ever again.. I like to know that we'll still be friendly and talk about stuff.

 

I'll take an example with a friend of mine, who's in a relationship since last summer (it so happen that they were best friends growing up). we know that we,ll have sex and still be friend after...

 

maybe for me it gets closer to a "f**kbuddy" than sex with friend

[Tiger]

Well, sleeping with one's best friend is definitely a bad idea. As I said before, I would rather be in a relationship, but since I am busy with my writing and school, I haven't much time for that right now.

[corvus]

oh, and in my opinion love is definitly underrated (just as a discussion like this one shows).

Where has all that romance, all that ~waiting 'til it's worth~ gone?

 

It went into this "True Love Revolution" that is "sweeping" my campus. I think it's just an excuse those certain students have made up to cover for the fact that they can't get any. Just kidding.

 

A few years ago, I overheard a pretty interesting conversation between these two jockish guys in a computer lab. Guy A, who was married, was telling his friend to save sex for marriage because "it was worth it." Technically, he doesn't know that. I found that rather amusing.