Looking for: Beta Reader for 180k++ novel. Romantic/Comedy/Slice of Life

[LJCC]

Working Title: The Longest Third Date

Genre: Contemporary Romance |Comedy | Slice of Life |

Classification:  Novel 

Setting: USA | Costa Rica

Length: Currently at 176k +++ (expected to end at 200k+)

Story Blurb: When high school Chemistry teacher Klebber Toledo and the big, hunky billionaire Dennis Ellison met on a dating app, they had no idea COVID-19 would turn their spur-of-the-moment trip to Costa Rica into a months-long adventure.

Plot: March 2020: 27-year-old Klebber Toledo and 32-year-old Dennis Ellison have gone on two good, if uneventful, dates after matching on Tinge. Looking to shake things up for the third time, they spontaneously agreed to fly to Costa Rica—with COVID lockdowns looming. What's the worst that could happen? Stranded together in a tropical paradise with no idea how they'll get home, the two unwittingly become players in a social experiment that will put their compatibility to the ultimate test. Did Klebber and Dennis decide to YOLO at the worst time possible? Or will their extended time together be just what they need to finally take a chance on love?

 

Story Excerpt, taken from Scene 1, Chapter 8: Relationships? Advice—Anyone?

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As twilight settled in, the running lights danced along the inlet, their glow seeping through the large, clear window. A glass of wine sat untouched on the table, with the other glass sipped clean and bonedry. Klebber was at the corner table. Seated across was Sargeant Morone. They were outside the terrace, their gazes fixed on the docks and the Brooklyn Bridge. The ambient light underlined Klebber's hair and his lashes, framing his right eye. He had worn a winter's topcoat for the night, with an open vest revealing his collarbone and chest—a seductive way to end things.

Why did he wear such an outfit if his intention was to break someone's heart?

Hearing the words that wavered out of Klebber's lips, Sergeant Morone struggled with his own thoughts that gnawed in his chest. But he knew he had to say it. There was no other way.

With a mournful smile, the officer left a couple of ten-dollar bills on the table, his eyes locked on his beauteous date. "If you ever have a change of heart, you know where to find me," he whispered. Getting up from his chair, he planted a tender kiss on Klebber's cheeks, and in the blink of an eye, he hauled a cab and vanished into the city's nocturne—likely to seek the company of libations at a local gay bar to drown out his sorrows.

Klebber held his mouth. Moist welled up in his eyes, threatening to overflow. He hurriedly left the restaurant, seeking to abate feelings of loneliness on the familiar bench just across the restaurant overlooking the East River.

Klebber's always been like this—locked up tight, never letting anyone get too close. He'd always share the story of his late husband with his dates, thinking it would make them understand why he had chosen to be alone. But deep down, his heart has been shattered three times. First, by his twin brother. Next, by his father. And then by Adam. Subjecting himself to another heartbreak would be asking for it. So he'd rather protect himself from getting hurt again than risk falling in love and having it all ripped away.

Meters ahead, parked near the restaurant, a 2020 white Lexus LX sat idly, its hazard lights blinking. Inside the car, Dennis put down the binoculars and turned to Marissa, seated at the back, a quizzical expression on his face, and asked, "What's up with your uncle? It seemed like he ended things with that guy, but why does he look so down? Don't tell me he's catching feelings for that loser!"

With a chicken nugget in hand, Marissa dipped it into the barbecue sauce and said between bites, "Auntie Tamara said that Uncle Klebber has a big problem with getting attached to anyone. She said he still loves Uncle Adam."

EXPECTATION:

So if you are interested in my style of writing, do PM me if you want to beta-read the story. Currently writing Scene 3, as I'm about to finish up and I might add a Scene 4 to close off all loose plots. 

I initially intended this as a 2 part novel, but it just doesn't make sense to cut the plot in half.

If you plan on beta-reading, what I do expect is:

• Provide feedback regarding the plot, characters, setting, or any anomalies or inconsistencies in the story.
• I will greatly listen to changes as long as it makes sense. 
• If you think this is better to do it this way or that way, then I'm here to listen. I will also ask you if this is better to do it this way or that way. So an exchange of opinions is greatly preferred.

That's it. That pretty much is the responsibility of a beta reader.

Tell me if you want me to send you the entirety of Scene 1 and 2 or would rather you read them separately. It's good either way.

MOVING FORWARD:

I'm planning to finish this story before the end of the year since Scene 3 requires more introspection and is more emotionally succinct in terms of writing it, so there are days or weeks I'm in a writing slump just thinking which direction I want a certain scene to take place. I already know the ending. It's the minor plots that get me slowing down to think.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited August 12, 2024 by LJCC

[stefan7891]

i come back for months and this story's still not done. i want to beta read this but i want to read the final work. this is looking very very good btw.

[LJCC]

2 minutes ago, stefan7891 said:

i come back for months and this story's still not done.

I'll try to finish it for the sake of the world.

If my cats die because I forgot to feed them, I'm blaming you.

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i want to beta read this but i want to read the final work.

I suggest you read it once I start posting this. 

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this is looking very very good btw.

THANKS! This is taking me nearly a year to finish, so it has to be good.
Or it's shite, and you start bombarding me with complaint emails. 😂