One thing I was thinking of yesterday. When your gay, you can fit a wide range of being "gay normal". If your gay, but masculine and fit the traditional qualities of a man, then everyone is like, "oh, he's just a normal gay dude". If your effeminate and fit more the stereotype of a gay guy, then people are like "oh, he's a typical gay guy", which they consider normal for a gay man to be. Where as if you are straight, you are expected to fit the narrow view of what it is to be a man.