sojourn

Jeff, Thanks for taking your time to review/comment again. I didn't want the Sheriff to be a complete stereotype, so I made him handsome and an itty bitty, teeny weeny, just a bit arrogant. And as we all know, arrogant assholes bare watching. Hope you continue to let me know what you think about it as it unfolds. Jim

Well, not as good as your first suggestion that I intend to use... but worth incorporating. Thanks, Jim

Where there is great passion there is great potential. (hmmm... wonder if that is an original expression?) Yes, I haven't started chapter 13 yet, but right now I can't think of a way for Raymond to even begin to get close to Danny. Still I have hope. thanks for taking your time to post. Jim

Yeah, Raymond has some heavy duty groveling to do... IF he is to get Danny back. We'll see. Thanks some much for taking the time to post your thoughts and opinions. They brighten my day. Jim

Thank you for taking the time to review/comment about my story. After posting each chapter I wonder if this is the one everybody hates. It feels good when someone takes the time to let me know they like my work. i hope you continue to enjoy the story as it unfolds. Jim

Raymond really did screw up. I remember as a Naval Lieutenant I had to tell an enlisted Master Chief, who was ROAD (retired on active duty)"You may not respect me, but I will not allow you to disrespect this uniform. Too many good men have fought and died wearing it, to let that happen." It got his attention and achieved some very positive results. If that memory had come to me while I was writing that scene, I am sure I would have lent some similar verbiage to Danny. I just felt that he was too wrapped up in his painful teenage memory to consider Raymond's words an affront to his profession. thanks again for taking your time to post your reviews/comments. Jim p/s, has my use of quotation marks improved?

WOW! Thanks for thinking that passage bore repeating. And of course thanks for taking your time to post your reviews/comments. Jim

Thanks, I thought it might be nice to close this chapter with a calming note. it occurred to me, at one point, that Danny and Raymond could have been a story of their own.... hmmmm maybe someday. thanks again for taking time to post your reviews/comments. jim

Thanks for posting your comment. I figure, as with most technology, by the time I get used to it it will be outdated. The first computer I ever worked with used binary or octal and a punched paper tape for troubleshooting. The computer controlled the guidance and flight control systems on a nuclear missile.

Thanks for posting your comment. I figure, as with most technology, by the time I get used to it it will be outdated. The first computer I ever worked with used binary or octal and a punched paper tape for troubleshooting. The computer controlled the guidance and flight control systems on a nuclear missile.

By the time Joe and Raymond arrived, someone had laid a tarp over the body. The first thing Joe did was to pull Paul and Jeff into a massive bear hug. When he stepped back, Raymond greeted Jeff warmly then placed a firm grip on Paul's shoulders and searched his eyes. “I know you weren't shot, but I have been in a similar situation. If you get to where what happened here today is all you can think about, I want you to know you can call me anytime. I am not only your attorney, but you and Maria ar

What a throughly sastisfying story. A wonderful ending... but, of course, as in all truly good stories, I wanted more. thanks for sharing, Jim

What a throughly sastisfying story. A wonderful ending... but, of course, as in all truly good stories, I wanted more. thanks for sharing, Jim

This is my first review on the new system. First off I enjoyed your story tremendously. I read it straight through. I love good Science Fiction. Heinlein, Asimov and Bradbury are some of my heroes. I would also say I am an avid fan of Mark Arbour. So it's not just Sci Fy I enjoy. A story has to interest me early on, by the first chapter at least. Your's grabbed me right away. There were things I would have done differently, maybe change a subplot or explore it further. But, that would have NOT made the story better. Just different. Now for the not so good parts: I sometimes have difficulty sorting out the dialogue when two people speak in the same paragraph. (Don't hesitate to use the return key.) I found some transitions were a little rough, going from one setting to another and advancing time. Now, IMHO: Some lead characters could have been fleshed out better. "Coincidentally meeting" old lovers cousin, old lover, Officer he assaulted, his Admiral being his sons, girlfriends father. I had had the feeling you grew tired near the end. Bottom line is I enjoyed it and may check back again in hopes that you will have explored these characters and settings further. Thanks for sharing, jim

Sorry, I am using an iPad Air with Safari as a web browser. When I selected "edit", on a reader's comment block, I had to search for the enter text block. I got used to finding it at the bottom of the page. Along with the entire text of the original comment. When I submitted my text, sometimes my text would appear with the original comments, similar to the old way. Other times the original comments would appear as though I had not responded to the comment at all. Yet there at the bottom of the page I would find a repeat of the original comment along with my response. It seemed all very confusing. Sorry if this is not very clear. I am not very savvy when it comes interfacing with new technology. Page 2 I noticed at the bottom of the comments section there was, to the left of the screen were the page numbers 1 and 2. I took that to mean there were more comments on another page. No matter what I tried it would not show page 2. I selected the number 2. I selected the "next" option. I also entered the number 2 in the box where you can type in the desired page number. All to no avail. Hope this makes sense to you. Jim Ford

I see I have page two of comments, but I can access page one. i have watched Myr's video on responding to comments but I am confused as some comments I "quoted",which apparently is the only way to respond to comments, seem to be unanswered and others appear to have my response attached. please help if you can. Jim Ford

I am having serious issues with responding to "comments ". I gave up for a while but I am trying again. seems the general consensus is to call the law. Wish them luck. thanks so much for your reviews/comments. Jim

The more I read these comments the more embarrassed I become. There really was a question as to what to do here. These guys are all about integrity. It certainly won't be easy. thanks as always for posting your comments. Jim

Mike, Thanks for adding your comments. Framing the Sheriff is beyond my reach? almost. I have faith that he will see this investigation as a pivotal point in his career. Thanks again, Jim

The darker aspect would be if they cover up what happened, it would establish a level of behavior that says they can use Ilya's small army to deal with problems without using the legal system. you are right I don't think Paul would tolerate not involving the police. He would feel guilty every time he faced Maria and she is the main reason he feels no more conflict than he does about having killed a man. thanks as always for your insightful comments. Jim

That line says it very succinctly. If I had thought a little harder, I would have handled Ilya's proposal differently. thanks for posting your comments. Jim

I know my gut told me there were two ways to go. Now, it tells me there never was a real choice except to do the right thing. Call the Sheriff. thanks, you always give me something to think about. Jim

I am cutting and pasting a response I just posted. At the time I finished the chapter, I thought there was a moral dilemma presented by Ilya. After sleeping on it and some deliberation I decided there should have been no discussion, this could have been resolved by a look and a nod between Jeff and Paul. By that time I had already posted the chapter, so I decided to just let it stand. The wrong decision here would have quite possibly been a deal breaker for Paul. thanks for adding your comments. Jim

I think the Sheriff will play a pivotal role, not only in the investigation but in how the town perceives our guys. Thanks for posting your comments, Jim