Sasha Distan

He's a horticulturist who doesn't actually like plants... it takes all sorts to make up this world. Huan-Yu is a good guy, quiet and soft, but a good guy nonetheless.

Husband comes home tomorrow. It's been a long time, and it seems like forever since I wrote to tell you all he was leaving. Home tomorrow, and it stills feels like forever away. I have to get through another long night with the bed cold and empty next to me until Dashi jumps up onto it and snugs so hard into my shoulder he practically pushes me out. Another morning walking with the Goblin strapped to my back, trying to convince the teething Goblin to eat breakfast. One more moment when I will get up, get out of the house, and pretend I'm totally fine. Because that's what I've been doing. "I'm fine." These are my default words, my automatic reply setting. I hate people asking me how I am, because I might tell them, and that's not the kind of person I am. I think my best moment over the past three weeks was finally getting the double height wall which goes up our stairs painted. It is bright lemon yellow, and the deep inside edge around the window is gold. It reflects the light beautifully, but I tonally matched the colours well enough that it's not glaring and crass. Worst moment? Oh, that's easy. I call it Tuesday morning. Goblin had a bad night, I didn't sleep. We'd had Young Sir's one year health check the previous day with a woman I hate, who I feel always judges me for my parenting style, which is somewhere between the way I treat the dog, and how I am generally. I'll snuggle and blow raspberries with my son, but when he tries to sit up under the table and bumps his head, I just shrug and go "Well, that's how he'll learn." The woman doing the check wanted to talk the whole time about Cris being away, and wanted to let me know there was help for me. I don't need her damn help. I have friends for that (and they've been amazing). So back to Tuesday: Got to work. Got asked 8 times if I was OK. Failed three times to print a damn picture I needed to give my students lesson 1 . Got asked by my boss if was OK, and snapped at him. got a shirty reply that he was just 'being polite'. Felt like a dick afterwards. Snapped in reprographics when said images failed to print AGAIN! Realised I had three product analysis lessons and had to products to analyse because I hadn't been out to get them, what with being super tired and having to take Goblin to childminders and Dashi to kennels. My head of House Nick came in to ask me something desperately unimportant about chickens while I was super busy dealing with my lessons and trying to rejig the scheme of work. He asked if there was anything he could do. My reply "Unless you can magic up some more hours where I can get some damn sleep and not be the only person worrying about my son, then no!" and then I cried. I cried in front of my Head of House. and he's a nice guy and all, but I do not want to be that person. I don't want anyone I work with to think I can't cope. I trade on being the one people go to because whatever else is going on, you know you can always throw Sasha five more tasks, and everything will always get done. and by this time, it was only 8.32am So yeah, I know when my worst moment was. Easily. People have told me for the last three weeks to make the most of Cris being away and do all the things I can't normally. I don't understand this, we don't have secret single behaviours. We've been together since we were 18, so everything we do we can do together, apart, separately and in the same room etc etc. what the one thing that's different? I can watch porn without headphones on. (No, we're not one of those couples who share porn, we like different things). I'm so ready for him to come home. Hurry home babe, your boys miss you.

thanks! and I quite like the idea of the binge-reading my work, makes me feel all snuggly inside. Perhaps Liam's parents wanted to make him a touch more cautious? After all, it's not like they're the most in-touch with their child parents on the planet unfortunately.

you can't surf on a beach. Surfing is for the waves! But hey, reading is better than partying, who knew?

I see what you did there... Control rarely makes people more dangerous, more useful maybe? I'm glad we're keeping you interested! thanks puppil

always extra questions! and hey, trade is supposed to be good for the economy, right? thanks for the review!

Every sensation was new. The texture of the wool cloak under his fingers was different from the material of the couch, the carpet on the floor under his feet. As he stood, the pressure of standing on his own two feet was entirely knew to him. Lahja wrapped the cloak around himself, and with careful movements, made his way across the floor. He had no actual destination in mind, which was a good thing, because he moved too slowly to get anywhere useful. Each step brought with it a host of new info

You know I love to make you squirm! Lots of good use of the emoticons, very nice. And I can't tell you anything, least we give away the plot. thank you thank you Tim. Poor Tim, and poor sweet tiger boy too.

ooh, big ideas! I'm saying nothing at all. nuh-uh. Thanks for the review hun!

no hands. or deformed hands. or losing my hands. nightmares generally with no hands. also very small dark underground spaces. you people who go potholing are 100% insane.

oh, just a little bit. Your poor hair! a) Emmett would never cheat on anyone. he's way too nice. b.) I'm not sure Emmett would dump anyone either. c) you you seriously think a tiger would share? d) no one dies in this story, except all the salmon. You'll just have to wait a whole another week. and thanks for the review.

So you say... on the other hand *massive cliffhanger* I'm glad we're keeping you entertained! thanks for the review.

Jian is a great guy, as you'll see. Emmett has his own, very special, point of view. I promise you'll be screaming a the computer screen soon enough. thanks Jeff!

I'm glad you liked it! Thanks jess

Emmett spent as much time as he could over the following weekend out of the house. Zeke had to work, which was both vastly inconvenient, because it meant that Emmett had to go home at night, but also useful because Zeke had been kind of pissed at him since he’d woken up to find that his boyfriend had come all over his sheets in his sleep. The morning after when he’d arrived home, he had been nervous and jumpy around Jian, full of the completely irrational fear that somehow the boy knew what Emme

Some of us are Like with anything, give it time. The mainstream will catch up eventually. Until then, there are plenty of stories and novels with complex gay characters (Alan Hollinghurst, John Spanbauer, Jamie O'Neill, Jesse Hajicek) for you to choose from. And of course, plenty of stuff here on GA. The only way any of it is going to get on television is by saturation. When there's too much good stuff to ignore, suddenly you'll start seeing what you want. And hey, Orange Is The New Black hardly featured rainbow-bubblegum characters.

Everything means something! I'm very big on names which have meanings to them. Jian will explain better in the fullness of time. And Chapter 7.

Happy Birthday Rustle!!! Have an awesome day sweetie xx

Happy Thanksgiving Canada-land! And spare a thought for my husband, stuck alone in his hotel in a region where everyone speaks French, and he has no real concept of what Thanksgiving even is. Busy week this week! Great prompts too.

Oh, his'll be just fine. You only lose them if you're a Prom' and you go missing for like 18 months. but thanks, and thanks Tim

thanks very much. I'm guessing James decided to embrace life - and Jordan!

Well, Tiger's are exotic and fancy, we'll see how they get on.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me?” I stared at the shield on my arm, the leather straps holding it tight enough I didn’t have to think about anything other than making a fist. The bronze metalwork decorating it showed the image of a burning tree on the background in tooled leather of a fireball. I stared at the space where the man had appeared to me as I’d lounged on the sofa, waiting for my boyfriend, the Indian takeaway, and the first episode of The Apprentice, in that order. No man stood

I think you have way more faith in Kiorl's ability to change than he does. But we'll see. Thanks for the review!

So what do we think? Is Emmett's brain trying to talk sense into him, or trick him? Is it even Emmett's brain doing the talking?