Thorn Wilde

My chapters tend to average around 3000 words, but that's me. I don't really care whether chapters are long or short when I read other people's work, but when reading in this sort of online format, it does start to get tiring when you start pushing 10k+ words per chapter. In a physical book, I stick in a bookmark. Online, I feel like I need to finish.

Eskel and Geralt often got in trouble. They were a pain in Vesemir’s, and all the other older Witchers’ backsides. They had trained together from childhood, and by the time they were in their teens, they had become good friends as well as partners in crime. ‘Get in here!’ Geralt hissed, holding the door to one of the castle’s many empty rooms open. Eskel positively flew through the doorway, and Geralt silently closed it behind them. They looked at each other and burst into silent laughter.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Geralt of Rivia will plough anything with breasts. This is not entirely correct. As it happens, breasts are optional. Yours truly, Dandelion the bard, knows this both from first hand accounts, and from . . . personal experience. The following manuscript is, of course, for my own eyes only.

Amanda Palmer is my favourite artist. She just creates so much cool art. Primarily music, but she does interesting performance art as well. She's been a living statue (the Eight Foot Bride), she's acted in a short film written by her husband, Neil Gaiman, she's created tonnes of awesome music, music videos and so on, and was even a stripper for a while, which I think in itself is also art, or at least can be. She's written a book called The Art of Asking, which is amazing. She's released several art books in conjunction with her albums. She's worked with lots of other artists, like Jason Webley (their album/art project Evelyn Evelyn is wonderfully weird and cool and awesome), Ben Folds (and Damian Kulash from OK Go, and her husband, on the album 8in8), and, recently, Jasmine Power, on a song called Mr. Weinstein Will See You Now (should be self explanatory what that one's about). Her cover of Pink Floyd's Mother is amazing, and the video is even better (but it has uncensored nudity, so not gonna link to it; look it up, though, if you don't mind that). She's . . . fairly political. And bisexual, so there's that. This is my favourite of her music videos. Long intro, but it's hilarious. Features drag queens, hipsters, and Stoya (boobs are censored in this version, but fair warning, probably NSFW):

I love Florence + the Machine. I was lucky enough to see her live at a festival some three years ago. She has such wonderful stage presence, and sings just as well live as on her albums. I find Drumming Song and Rabbit Heart really sexy, too.

Devon's a sweetheart. In his world love is easy and open and free. He's willing to grant love to just about anyone who wants it, which is such a wonderful quality. I may have to write a short story about him one day.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN A Million Little Pieces Matt put his arm around Nick’s shoulder as they left Sapswell College after band practice. ‘So! You guys coming to my birthday party? Eighteen, motherfuckers!’ ‘What’s gonna change? You’ve done everything eighteen-year-olds can do for years already,’ said Stuart. ‘Except vote. Now I can vote! I can kick out the Tories!’ Matt grinned. ‘So, are you lot coming or what?’ Stuart shrugged. ‘Sure.’ ‘Of course I’ll come!’ Nick smiled,

Don't forget, Dave's dad is a star lawyer. And this is Europe. That property is extremely valuable. She'll get money.

Nothing wrong with country, @mollyhousemouse. Here's another one of mine:

I think Dave showed remarkable self restraint, yeah. He's punched his dad before, after all.

I know, right?

He isn't, it's true. I love Patrick, he's one of my favourite characters I've written, I think.

Brian thinks he's doing Nick a favour, somehow. He's not exactly sober himself...

Yeah, it's the worst possible thing for Nick to do at the moment. Brian and the drugs both.

You know, I like Brian, too. Parts of him, anyway. He means well, bless him. He's just not very good at gauging consequences. And it would have been so easy to make him totally awful and unlikable, but that would have been boring. People aren't like that, not really.

Yeah, Nick's self medicating. A lot. Thanks for reading!

Too soon!!!! 😢

CHAPTER FOURTEEN Spite and Malice ‘It’s been lovely to see you guys!’ Maria gave Nick and Zoë each a long hug, beaming at them, and air kissed Richard on both cheeks. ‘I’m so happy for you two. And you,’ she turned to Nick, ‘good luck in all your endeavours. Your band is going to be great, I just know it! Never give up, okay?’ She ruffled his hair and picked up her suitcase. ‘Hey, actually, let me walk you to the bus stop.’ Nick smiled. ‘Aww, thank you! You don’t have to.’

I'm glad you liked my little plot twist. I hinted vaguely at it back in book two, but honestly, back then even I didn't know the extent of it. It was fun when they finally let mr know. Thanks for reading and commenting! Chapter fourteen will be posted in, like, fifteen minutes or so.

He’s going to leave. He’s got what he came for, found the help he needed, and now he’s going to leave again. I’ve convinced myself that that’s okay. I always knew he’d leave. He’s not the kind to stick around. And I know he’s used us. It’s not his fault, not really. It’s his nature to use people for his own ends, to take advantage, and I’ve known him long enough not to feel surprised or hurt. And yet, to see him leave again so soon, when just yesterday I thought he was dead and that I would

Johnny Storm/Daken Akihiro. I can’t say how long I’ve wanted this, his lips on mine, his tongue in my mouth. And even as I’m thinking it, I can’t be sure if this is something I actually want or something he’s making me want. I try not to care, try to just ignore it, because he’s beautiful. He’s beautiful and terrible in the way of a massive thunderstorm, or a tidal wave, or another destructive force of nature. If I want him because he wants me to want him, I think I can live with that.

Thank you as ever for your comments! That's a beautiful poem. I have not read Still You Want Me. Who wrote it?

I'm binge watching White Collar right now. I started a few days ago, now coming up on the end of season 2. Didn't think I'd love it this much.

What are songs that you find inherently sexy or erotic? I don't mean songs about sex (though they can be), it can be a riff that makes you feel a certain way, a voice, anything really. Like this one: There's just something about it. Admittedly, it's probably about sex, but I found it sexy long before I listened properly to the lyrics. I love the riffs, and it features Maynard from Tool, whose voice is amazingly alluring to me. So! Show me yours! EDIT: I guess maybe this is a little too personal for most people to comment on...

I didn't really have any, I don't think... Not in my teens. I didn't listen to pop music, I watched anime and weird movies, read comic books... I had a few fictional crushes, it's true. When I was maybe eighteen, nineteen, I fell in love with David Tennant. Then it was Benedict Cumberbatch. And I was super attracted to the voice of Maynard James Keenan from Tool, also when I was eighteen or so. Oh, and I had crushes on Nathan Fillion, Morena Baccarin, and, well, actually the entire cast of Firefly. But none of these are teen idols, they're just celebrity crushes. I guess I was weird.