Cynus

"It… freaked me out. I poured so much of myself when I was a freshman, that it was a trippy and crazy experience to see how much of myself was in the protagonist. And it begged the question: How much do I want this story to be based on my life experiences? And quite frankly, I didn’t know how to answer. Hell, I still don’t know. :(" I relate to this 100%, Spawnling. I started writing a novel earlier this year which I put more of myself into than any other I've ever written, and it started to get a little too thick emotionally for me to continue. Could I really be so vulnerable to the world? I still don't have the answer, either, and so the story is currently shelved, perhaps to never be touched again. I don't know what the answer is, but I do understand how this question can weigh on your mind. I can also say that if/when you do return to the story, I'm definitely excited to read it. I really enjoyed the first chapter as is, and I'm sure I'd enjoy it edited, too. Peace and love, Spawnling. Your Devilsire, Cynus

Thank you, everyone, for the birthday wishes!

That's a nice cake, too.

If I hadn't become a recluse, I'd probably still dress up and go to one of the numerous costume parties I'm invited to every year. But I have become a recluse, so I don't. I love Jack'O'Lanterns, and if my apartment complex allowed them, I'd absolutely still carve a pumpkin every year and place it on my balcony. There's something magically nostalgic about seeing the flames flickering behind those carved faces. Last year, while writing "Mask of the Hunter", I delved into the spiritual traditions behind Samhain, one of several holidays which has contributed many of the traditions of Halloween which we celebrate today. I fell in love with many of the spiritual aspects, such as the spirit of renewal that advances with the death of the world in fall, and it's incubation during winter, and this year I plan to hold my own, private, Samhain celebration as well as I can manage. Even took the time off work.

Comsie, I don't know you. To my knowledge we've never spoken, despite inhabiting the same space for some time now. I haven't read any of your work yet, either, and hope you'll forgive me for that. I didn't know you and many of our fellow authors existed until I joined the LGBT writing community, and my reading has slowed to a tiny trickle since then. I'm not reading anyone right now, even though I often feel like I should be doing it more. You've been on my radar for a long time despite my lack of reading. It feels like I run into a new person every week who tells me how much he loves your work. I don't know if those people are communicating those things to you, but I can verify for certain that your work is not only read often, but it's cherished by a large number of people. I sometimes envy your following (I try not to, but sometimes I can't help it) because from my outside perspective it always felt like you had so many people dedicated to your art. I'm so sorry to hear that you've had so much negativity thrown your way along with that. I relate to everything you said in this post, as well as I can with my fewer years of experience, anyway. In the three years since I began writing online, I've already lost count of the number of times I've felt this way. The lack of reader participation, the emails of people who think they know better than you how to tell your stories . . . It's so awful when that's the bulk of what you're getting, and I completely understand. From one artist to another, I really hope you don't stop, though. I really hope you don't let them win. Again, I've come across a large number of people who adore your work, and it's important work even if you don't get a chance to collect the accolades. You've helped a lot of people with what you've written, I'm sure of it. I'll have to make a greater effort to read something of yours soon. Maybe once I get past this recent batch of deadlines. *sigh* Please, don't let the control freaks win. The community is stronger because of you. And maybe, if I'm lucky, at some point I'll get to know you, and this conversation won't be one between strangers. I look forward to learning from you. Hope you'll be here when I get the chance. Peace.

I love the cake, Spawnling. I love the poem, buddy.

Weirdness is a great word for it. Mr. Thompson is a prick, but what's really going on? Excellent question. Maybe I should answer it? I strive for realism in my characters, rather than perfection. I've missed the mark a few times, for sure, but I like to think I do pretty well overall. Zane and Clint both have their faults, and are both far from being superhuman. But Clint is definitely unpredictable, that much is 100% true. The date is now here. Will it be everything you expected? Or will it go smoothly for once . . . Thank you for the review!

You don't want to see how Clint would build the GSA? I'm sure it'll go just as well as his coming out did. He has his work cut out for him just in being Zane's boyfriend. I mean, he has to serve as the counter-weight to Zane's father, and that's a pretty tall order. But the pressure is mounting, that's for sure. What'll happen when it becomes too much? Brilliant observation, and thank you for sharing. And thank you for the review!

I'd say that if Clint has that disability, Mr. Fjeldsted definitely isn't aware of it yet. If he were, he definitely wouldn't be so hard on his son for his grades, at least not with his math grades. It might be interesting to explore, though, so I'll keep it in mind. The story isn't finished yet, after all, though I wish I were done . . . it's starting to get hard to keep up. I think it's great that you're analyzing that, though, and I hope you'll continue to offer up those sorts of observations. It's fascinating to learn about such things, and even if I don't use it with Clint, it opens up ideas for future characters, so thank you. Zane's father . . . well . . . you'll find out more soon. Thank you for the review!

I think Clint on the council would've been fun, though he'd drive absolutely everyone nuts. He'd certainly make interesting choices for activities, and those activities would probably get everyone in trouble. Rebecca's a strong girl, and she'll be able to put up with it, probably better than the males can. Thanks for the review!

There are reasons. I can't say they're good ones, or bad ones, only that they exist. When you learn the answer, you'll have to be the judge on that one. Clint is absolutely the perfect counterbalance to Zane's father. No one could be more opposite in personality, at least as far as I've ever written. Thank you for wondering about Zane's parents' relationship, and asking questions. I'm glad you're curious, and hope I'll be able to give you an adequate answer when the time arrives. Thank you for the review!

I was a little caught up in how to answer your review last time, and then I was pulled away and forgot I still had reviews waiting for me. Now that I'm here again, I'm still not 100% sure how to answer, haha! I think Clint and Zane are both good for each other as a learning experience at least, though will they be great as a couple? I guess we'll find out on that one. It's good to see your analysis of their relationship, and to see you questioning it, wondering if Zane will end up more like his Dad or end up overcoming that side of himself. I'm grateful you've taken the time to contemplate it and let your imagination and reasoning play out different scenarios. As for Zane's mom . . . Keep reading. It took me awhile to work it all out, but I do think you'll find the resolution adequate. I suppose I won't know for sure until we get there, though. Sorry it took so long to get to your review! Hope the reply was appropriate. Thanks again!

Learning about Zane's relationship with his father will be a constant in this story, right up until the end, whenever that happens to be. As for Nikola, Luca, and Dante, each have a role in my story "From The Cup of The Worthless". This is actually a cameo for them. You can read it here if you're interested: http://www.gayauthors.org/story/cynus/fromthecupoftheworthless Thank you for the review!

Mr. Fjeldsted took us to my house first, where I was instructed to quickly drop off my things. Clint followed me inside with an extra bag his father had stashed in the back seat, and left it in my room. I asked him what was going on and he told me it was just his overnight bag because he'd be spending the night. Without any further details about his plans for us that evening, he grinned at me and left to rejoin his father in the driveway. I stopped to use the restroom, and when I came o

Hey everyone! My story "Mask of the Hunter" is currently on sale on Amazon(Kindle) for $0.99 through Halloween! It's also available for free here at GayAuthors.org, but if you'd like to support my efforts in becoming noticed at Amazon, this would be a great way to do it. Every little bit helps my stats, and the stats help me sell my books to others who haven't yet had a chance to read it. If you can't afford it or otherwise have something preventing you from purchasing it, but still want to help, please feel free to read the story here at GA and then review it on Amazon. I'd also love it if those who've read "From The Cup of The Worthless" would also take the time to review it on Amazon. Thanks! You'll find the link to that story here: http://www.gayauthors.org/forums/blog/622/entry-16126-from-the-cup-of-the-worthless-now-available-on-kindle/ If you'd like a refresher as to what the story is about, here's a brief description: Halloween is a night of mystery and magic, and for Samuel Cleese it is no exception. When attending a masquerade goes awry, he's drawn into the most magical night of his life. Who is the mysterious man whose face is hidden by a dark mask, and what does the future hold for Samuel? Thank you for your time and your support! Have a great Halloween season!

My school week passed mostly without incident until Friday morning. I was ready on time most of the days, meaning Greg didn't have to come into the shower room to fetch me. On Friday, however, he arrived uncharacteristically early, and he was there to help me out of the pool at the end of my swim. I swam to the edge and rested my arms on the side, staring up at him. "What are you doing here?" I asked, glancing at the wall clock. "I still have plenty of time." "Yes, but," Greg s

Hello everyone, Sorry the reviews have been a bit slow in coming, and sorry to anyone who is still waiting on a response from me. There have been a few developments in my life recently which have impacted these things, and I'm going to lay them out as quickly as possible (because writing hurts). Health Issues: My years of typing and playing video games have caught up to me at last. I have developed carpal tunnel in both wrists, though it is worse in my right hand. Although I acquired Dragon Speech Recognition software this week, I haven't yet managed to train myself on how to use it in a web browser, although this is simply because I haven't made it a priority to learn that facet of the program, not because it can't be done. Life Issues: I'm currently recovering from a bout of depression which threatened me for the better part of this year. I've recently identified the source (after several quite nasty sessions of introspection) and I'm now feeling incredibly good mentally. Probably the best I've felt in years. Hopefully that continues. Work has been in upheaval all year, with a number of key people leaving our staff and a lot of responsibilities shifting around. Although acquiring some of those responsibilities gave me a pay raise and benefits, it also required a lifestyle change and a great deal of anxiety. Even though we're about to enter our busy season, things are starting to settle down for my position, and it looks like I'm going to have rather smooth sailing for a little while. Hopefully this continues, too. Thank you, everyone, for understanding, and I hope you'll continue to bear with me as I get caught up. Peace and love, Samuel

There's so much I love in this review, so thank you for it. I really enjoy your analysis about Zane and his father, and appreciate your understanding of the situation. This is exactly what I was going for with the writing, and that anyone picked up on it makes me happy. Zane is trying so much to earn his father's approval that he's slowly becoming him, and it's definitely going to clash with our rebellious and energetic Clint. As for Clint's understanding of the situation, we'll see some of that, soon, though I won't spoil which way that falls. Chapter 5 was rough to write but it delivers a lot of information, albeit subtly. Hope you enjoy it when it posts in a couple of days.

Thank you, Parker. Also, since DQ brought it up in his review, I'll post a link to "The Drawbacks of Being a Monster" in your review, too. http://www.gayauthors.org/story/cynus/thedrawbacksofbeingamonster Thank you for referencing specific points you liked about the plotting in this chapter. It helps to know what I did right with what I chose to include. I'm glad you enjoyed learning about Zane's reserve and unhappiness, and it's helpful to know that you found the detail appropriate regarding Zane's familial connections. Great review, thanks!

I'm glad you gave me a month. Thankfully, I managed to finish it ahead of schedule. This is actually the first short story I ever posted online, and it's what got me started at AwesomeDude back in 2013. http://www.gayauthors.org/story/cynus/thedrawbacksofbeingamonster Zane's dad is . . . complicated. Trust me, there will be answers in time, although I can't guarantee there will be good or defensible ones. We have the rest of the story to resolve that conflict, though, so hold on for the ride. Thank you for the review!

Storms are made for dancing, so get ready for a tango. It's going to be a close one. I don't know what that sentence means, really, but it was fun to write! It's an unfortunate reality, however, that some people think they're doing us a favor by preventing us from getting proper representation. It's like they think they're erasing the target from our backs by erasing us altogether . . . I don't get it, but that doesn't mean they don't exist. Thank you for the review! (Also, thank you for the observation about Clint's energy. I appreciate critiques which directly reference the way I write)

Many things in store regarding the Clint and Zane's dad interactions. Hopefully once the other shoe drops you won't be too put off from the rest of the story. As for things going well, you'll just have to keep reading to find out! Drama is what drives a story like this, though, so . . . Thank you for the review!

It's a good thing the principal has Ms. Singh to look out for him, isn't it? At least they have one ally who will fight for them, and knows there's problems in the school which can be addressed by giving the students some self-empowerment and representation. Drama is definitely on it's way. Thanks for sticking around and for the reviews!

Thankfully, because of Zane's already extensive circle of friends/contacts mixed with Clint's small group of friends, finding members won't be too much of a problem, but the resistance from the administration could certainly still be a problem. At least they have an ally though, right? Though that worry of the club continuing after its founders move on . . . that is a little troubling. Thank you for the review!

Tutoring began slowly but went better than expected. I'd thought Clint would resist my attempts to get him to study, but it didn't take much to get him into his books. This surprised me, but every once in a while, I'd glance up from explaining something and catch him looking at me instead of the book we had open. He'd blush and ask a question about what we were studying, and I'd answer as well as I could before pausing to consider what his glances meant. And then we started working on