Will Hawkins

When I was young, really a number of years ago, I lived in Arizona, in Tucson, not Pheonix however, That meant it was hot, but because Tucson is at a higher elevation than is Pheonix, not quite so hot. I remember the desert fondly -- it teems with life and energy. Oh, sure the life hides during the day, but it is there, possibly just hiding under the surface or beneath a rock, but there nonetheless. Even the greens of the desert are hidden, but it takes only a touch of rain and the entire landscape leaps into life. It is a fascinating place to live. To see the desert after a rainstorm is to truly realize the meaning of resurrection.

The word magic just entered into the equation, interesting. We will have to see where this leads!

It seems that there is going to be a period of adjustment, but that Worthington will turn out to be a good guy in the end... We will see.

The premises for this story are not difficult to accept. the writing as far as I can see is perfect grammatically, I will be following you daily in my reading. A superior start to a different type of tale from the usual "coming out trauma' that is almost standard for GA.

Check your sources, the expression you are looking for is "barking up the wrong tree," It comes from hunting raccoons with doga.

to stack up on - do you mean to 'stock up on'. This is not actually an error, I just feel 'stock' is a better word to express your meaning here.

just lied there - Let's try 'just lay there', this is what is known as a homophone, a word that sounds like another but is not the correct spelling\meaning, 'lied' is a past tense of lie, to tell an untruth we should be using 'lay', to place oneself down on a surface, It is an error that a 'spell-check' program will not detect, so it creeps into an author's work by sneaking around the corners. Hey, there are only between four and five hundred of these little f===ers in the English language.

Well, the last name thing worked out very well for Kat, didn't it. Let's see how nausea can be helped. Pardon my male ignorance, I know that nausea is a symptom of hormone imbalance in a pregnant woman, but are there no medications to control it? It seems almost medieval to have to endure that for up to full term.

An amnesiac character in a story is also a good way to give your reader a great deal of information without it's becoming overwhelming, blah, blah, blah, as well.

As soon as I figure out what the f=== is going on I may comment.

Ignorance is not always blissful. Sometimes it is dangerous. I believe Daniel needs to solve the mysteries that surround the work of his friend and the strange person who has usurped his place in Charles life. I can only hope that he is able to rescue Charles before it is too late.

a single human being would have been able to oppose -- a single human being would have been able to exert The estrangement which now exists between Charles and Daniel is more than a coldness that has developed between them from three years of separation. Charles is being influenced negatively by Henry who is apparently a replacement. This implies more than a gay relationship that has gone sour from neglect. We will have to read on to get a clear answer to the problems that now exist.

I am glad to see the closeness between the two men growing, I feel at this point each needs the support of the other. But still, the mystery deepens with each new chapter. I am increasingly interested in how you work this out, "They sounded odd, not like something a person would make, I don’t think." This statement contains a serious grammatical error -- one that a newspaper reporter would be unlikely to make. the sentence needs to be recast, perhaps as, "They sounded odd, I think, unlike the statement a person would make." to remove the double negative.

The next day efforts were redoubled, This statement is not an error, but perhaps a better choice of words would be "The next day efforts were resumed." For the efforts to be redoubled implies that previously they were sadly lacking, which in this case seems to be a harsh judgment when all the staff is participating in the search for the missing woman. "Squirrels are merely rats with good PR." a wonderful statement, they are both merely rodents with different tails. I would toss chipmunks into the mix as well, especially noisy one named Alvin!

Yes, Charles is suffering from depression, but in that era, no one knew enough about the human psyche to even give the illness a name. The building relationship between the two men can be a lifesaver if it is recognized and jointly developed. People of extreme intelligence, it seems, are also subject to extremes in mental anguish. Albert, if I may address you in that fashion, I feel you are laying the groundwork for a disaster; leaving a trail of crumbs as it were. Let us hope that Charles is able to find his way out of the depths of the despair into which he is falling.

Indeed, Doctor Watson, there is something strange afoot. Will you call it the mystery of the fur-lined crater?

In addition to the explosion of an object from space killing a large number of people at a party, we have a detached human hand, a meteorite of unknown chemical composition the corpse of a curious reporter and disappearing hikers, I believe it is time to call Mr. Holmes, Oh, that is a different series of stories, isn't it. Well, it is the correct era!

The mystery does indeed deepen, but at this time there is no apparent connection between the 'natural' phenomena of the crashing cometary debris and the attacks on the hikers, so we are left with one natural catastrophe and one mystery. It is an exercise in creativity fo the author to work this out, Alright, on to subsequent details...

Your writing conveys a deep sense of fear of the cosmos that surrounds us as if it were a malevolent ogre. I am fortunate not to have this great fear but a corresponding interest and excitement. Space, to me, can be a playground for mankind as his abilities grow. Each new fact that we learn about this vast mysterious void that surrounds us, only adds to my curiosity. I am of an age that means I will not live to see a man walk upon even the other nearby planets beyond his dusty footprints on our sister planet the moon, but even that 'small step' made in my lifetime has fueled the imagination of a generation. Excellent writing, I well hurry and download the next chapter.

An intriguing beginning for your tale and the nineteenth century feel to the writing gives it the proper atmosphere. it must be much like attempting to write in a foreign language to preserve that atmosphere. It certainly is to the author's credit that he is able to do so.

I have recommended Grammarly to authors frequently, but I didn't know they had a version that would accept British spelling. I am glad to see it is getting around. I normally don't bother with stories with only a few chapters, but I have read some of your longer tales and enjoy your writing skills as well as learning more and more about my second favorite country, next to my own that is, but then I am losing love for the USA considering our present political situation.

I have changed my mind to a certain extent -- I will continue to read this story, but I will not be making comments. If an author does not desire criticism then they should not have it. I will honor the author's wishes.

Elsewhere on this and other sites in the GA spectrum, I have commented on the Second Amendment to the Constitution and the restrictions I believe are reasonable to place on gun ownership in the US, which has a record of four or five times the deaths by handguns of any nation in the world, so maybe this is my opportunity to express my opinion on First Amendment rights to freedom of speech. Firstly, I believe that the First Amendment should grant to a citizen the unfettered right to say anything about any subject without fear of contradiction by someone who holds a differing opinion. The example of shouting "fire" in a crowded theater is a hackneyed but true example of a reasonable restriction. Secondly, every citizen is aware of the practice of the almost universal extent of puffery used in political campaigning. Anything said by any candidate for office is almost expected to be exaggerated to the extent of falsehood and should not be a part of his communication after he is sworn into office. However, once a candidate is elected his constituents should expect honesty from him. If for the sake of security, an official cannot speak the truth to his constituents he should say nothing about that sensitive a subject or else tell them he cannot speak to it because a statement might endanger the security of the country. He should say nothing rather than lie. I use as an example of a politician who is unaware of this restriction an important elected official of this country who has been tested and failed repeatedly in this sense. At last count, over7,500 times since he was sworn in.

I have stated my opinion on the issue of gun control in the US elsewhere. I believe that the bearing of arms as stated in the Constitution of this country should be interpreted as a privilege, not a right. It is a privilege that should be earned, not given as a toy is given to a child. I realize I am probably in a distinct minority with this opinion, nonetheless, I feel I have to express it. Firstly, my opinion applies to handguns only. Hunting rifles are a different category and there must be different rules set up for them. However, automatic or semi-automatic weapons, even single shot rifles with 'bump stocks' or the ability to add that mechanism post-sale, should be forbidden, those are weapons of war not of self-protection. There are certain classes of people in this country who should be able to own weapons. I place in this category Peace Officers and trained military personnel, but even in those categories, I feel that the privilege should be heavily restricted. Gun owners must be thoroughly vetted to weed out those with psychological problems, no matter how restrictive that may be, and adequate and continuing training must be a requirement for continuing membership in this privileged class. The restriction against gun ownership by felons is another class that should be studied quite closely -- not all crimes classified as felonies imply a tendency toward violence on the part of a perpetrator who has served his time. Yes, this implies a continuing training and vetting program and will cost money to support, but, to my mind, it is an absolute necessity. If you want the privilege of owning a handgun, you must pay for it. The practice of gun fairs where weapons are available for any nutcase that has the money to buy can acquire a weapon, must stop and weapons that are no longer desired should be either destroyed or sold back to registered dealers, who must then initiate the vetting process again to sell on the secondary market. No weapon should be liable to acquisition by devise or gift to an ineligible person.

Statement of fact: 100% of pregnancies, wanted or not wanted, are caused by men. Even in the cases where: 'the rubber broke, tore. or came off', the pregnancy that resulted was caused by sperm inseminated by a male. Male sperm, to the best of my knowledge, is not available in a bottle on a drugstore shelf for purchase by a woman to allow self insemination. Yet the decision about to abort or not to abort falls to the victim, not the perpetrator. Any restriction on abortion is manifestly unfair. It is the woman who will suffer nine months of discomfort, the dangers of the birth process and its concomitant pain, not the inseminator. Now admittedly, some women want to become pregnant, but of those who do not wish to bear a child, no restriction of law, cost or social onus should be placed upon her. As a male, I will never be faced with a decision such as this, but I am well known for having an opinion on any subject.