Will Hawkins

but I heard less the longer we stayed here. but I heard it less the longer we stayed here. surprises? Out there? Is there? surprises? Out there? Are there? He watched as I was apparently my nose was turning He watched as it was apparent my nose was turning maybe we can help make up the years of suffering they have. maybe we can help make up the years of suffering they had. Oh, DQ, where are you when I need you?

He was bitten by the same vampire I and Gabby was. He was bitten by the same vampire Gabby and I was. Gabriella and were bitten by the same vampire. Gabriella and I were bitten by the same vampire.

the torch lit way casted it’s eeriness over where we were the torch lit way cast its eeriness over where we were - correct tense of the verb and proper punctuation for the possessive pronoun It wouldn’t due to have - It wouldn’t do to have - homonym.

I said loud - I said loudly. Needs to be an adverb format. “You do?” - "You did?" tense agreement. not as bad a Nicolae. - not as bad as Nicolae.

Christian said loud - Christian said loudly

Whose backing you? - Who's backing you? contraction of who is.

As I interpret the discussion between the guys so far; there are two Vlads, the father, Vlad the Impaler who protected his city from the Turks by jamming enemy warriors on stakes, and his son, Vlad Dracule known as Dracula, who may be the inspiration for Bram Stoker's story. I did not realize Bram Stoker was Irish and never even visited Romania during his lifetime, or that there were so many different languages used in Romania, it is interesting what facts you can pick up by reading references in GA stories! And on a second reading, a few more facts, having nothing to do with the story. Bram Stoker, the author of the original Dracula book was a known homosexual and associated with others of his kind. He was closely associated with the theater (stage) in England and acted as a manager of, I believe, the Abby Theater contributing greatly to its success- He did marry and his wife bore him one son, but the marriage was considered to be loveless and primarily sexless.

Yes, Eric, you do have a great writing style and even from a grouchy old troll's viewpoint, the number of grammatical errors you are making is decreasing. Someday and soon I believe the troll brigade will be able to retire. Totally a good show friend, keep up the good work,

Which we knew that would probably happen! - Which we knew would probably happen! remove excess wording.

Details on that campaign is blurred - Details of that campaign are blurred

he still had stumble there - he still had stubble there She’s live half of her life down here. - She’s lived half of her life down here.” but that mean it’s not going to happen - but that doesn't mean it’s not going to happen - but that means it’s not going to happen Two possibilities here.

“The last one was sited about a hundred years ago.” s\b "The last one was sighted about a hundred years ago."

Yeah, and don't forget bugs like flies and mosquitoes. Oh, not to mention alligators and even out on the beach, Portuguese men-of-war with their lovely purple stinging hair. During certain times of the year those things would blow up onto the beach and die, but you could come along two or three days later and step into that purple mess by accident and get badly stung. Oh, I know all about those things, when I was just a kid I lived in Hollywood Beach, an oceanfront vacation community just north of Miami and spent hours every day out in the sunshine getting skin cancer.

I had visions of camel ridden caravans going across the sands. delete word. “Where is the natural father?” - Where is his natural father?

we called at a descent time - decent plagues - plaques

his hair was showing signs of losing its grip with his head on top. Some women wore the burkas and others didn’t. you or your government to search These people are trusted members of my family and dear friends

peaked - piqued: stimulated they always was with a vampire. were

“I see it’s payed off.” - paid Which has a lot written in hieroglyphics - have Translations already done you and me are in danger - you and I are in danger

to some of the bite off. - to take some of the bite off.

which Jeremy was a little smitten with Lilly, but she kept it light. remove which around his shoulder as squeezed him to me - and “All the new psychoses because of that,” it Stan’s intimacy with Buddy - intimate in case you need power more - in case you need more power I told them equally quiet - quietly

she had his dressed already - him “We’re not the firsts, you know?” first said to be there best at translating - their We can start weening you away… - weaning

Well, Snarky is here, but I am seeking help from my team-mate droughtquake. If you do your part, you can do punctuation and tenses and I'll do homophones, but by this time we should have together gotten the author straightened out and can relax and just enjoy. The postings of the comments are running about fourteen months behind so Eric probably isn't even reading them anymore. It is interesting to me that Grammarly does such a good job with some types of errors, but totally falls apart on homophones.

“Are going after the others?” This sentence needs a subject, put in a pronoun. “Are you going after the others?”

“He had a meeting the Minister of Defense." Let's put a 'with' in there, 'a meeting with the Minister...' "Went in to Lilly’s room." into as one word, please. I am in a small puzzlement - where are you writing from? I have seen times expressed as 9.00am which is British practice, but defense is spelled American style. Confusion reigns! "Your wife and Dennis raised a daughter, her is named Katie." The wrong tense for the pronoun, use 'she'. 'she is named Katie.'

Okay. I was wrong. That may not be unusual, but it upsets me a little. End of sob story. I am pleased to see Wayne getting the injection. But his condition is so much worse than the other subjects, I can only hope it works as well with him.