Nowhere Man - 14. Chapter 14: Need A Light

When you meet someone for the first time, you realize that each person has their own voice, their own language. Even though we both spoke English, there was something about the way Detective Davis Fordham spoke that highlighted those differences.

Having been with Tyler long enough for him to rub off on me, I realized I was giving the officer the same vague, one word answers that annoyed me so much about the nowhere man.

“So he torched the trailer park in Easton?”

“Yes.”

“The one that caused half the town to go down, 7 deaths and almost 40 injuries?”

“That was him.”

“And where were you when this was going down?”

“Watching.”

“From where?”

“The truck.”

“You were in the getaway truck?”

“Yes.”

“And where is this Tyler now?”

“Home.”

His glare was amplified by the square rimmed glasses that he peered over, boring a hole through me, exposing my soul in a way that terrified me.

“Let’s go,” he stood. He grabbed his coat, and made quickly for the exit. Detective Davis was in his early forties. He was about my height with a solid build. I knew, by the way he filled the athletic cut sports coat, with a hard chest and broad shoulders, that he took care of his body. His face was distinguished, framed beautifully by a five o’clock shadow. Handsome.

I followed him to his navy blue squad car. I hesitated about which seat to take, but followed his lead and went to the front passenger’s side. I wasn’t under arrest.

“So you didn’t actually kill anyone?” he asked me as we pulled away from the station and the American flag faded in the rearview.

“No,” I lied. “It was all him.”

“And who exactly is on his death list?”

“I already told you.”

“Humor me, kiddo, and tell me again.”

I don’t know what I expected; sirens, maybe a faster drive towards the park. I expected to be in handcuffs by then. Detective Davis’ demeanor was nonchalant at best. How many people came in to report vicious crimes to him?

“His ex-wife-”

“Whose name you don’t know.”

“-and her lover. And a rodeo clown named Wade.”

“Killed him twice, evidently.”

“Half of Easton Park.”

“Seven people.”

One of which was most likely my brother.

“Yes sir.”

“No sir. Just Davis.”

“Okay, Davis.”

I could tell that the whole story sounded incredulous to him. It was why he wasn’t running around with handcuffs and handguns. He wanted to make sure I wasn’t crazy before he took action that could potentially embarrass him. What if I was just a headline chaser trying to take credit for a town fire a couple hundred miles away? I knew I wasn’t, but Davis didn’t.

We arrived at the park, and it looked just as I left it with the exception of the sun beating from the other side of the sky. Davis asked if Tyler was armed.

“I don’t think so, but I can’t be sure” I replied. He instructed me to wait in the car. He drew his gun as he stalked into the trailer, checking every corner as he proceeded. I ignored the eyes of nosey neighbors, peering through drawn blinds and screen doors.

What would Tyler say to me ending this whole thing? It was the ultimate betrayal. Not only was I leaving him, but I was turning him in. What else could I possibly do? For the rest of my life, I had no intention of looking behind me, afraid of my own shadow, not only of the law but also of a man who had proved time and time again to have more secrets than answers. I couldn’t handle it anymore.

And then there was the question of Wade. What did he mean to Tyler? I had no clue, but it was clear from Tyler’s response earlier that it was something close and personal. I wouldn’t give every piece of my loyalty to a guy that could only give me a piece of his.

Davis reappeared in the doorway, his gun back in its holster, and motioned for me to join him inside. I hesitated as I slid out of the car and inched towards the trailer.

The minute I stepped inside, I knew something was different. The home that Tyler had stocked just for me was now completely empty. I looked around as if seeing the place for the first time. Every light was off and everything was gone. Only the furniture that came with the trailer was still there.

I crossed to the kitchen and opened the fridge. Everything was gone. I sprinted to the bedroom, flipped the light switched and gasped. An empty bed barely filled the room. The television that only a few hours before had lay smashed in the corner was nowhere to be found. Wades body was gone. The room was as empty as a Monday morning church.

But what I realized was missing the most was Tyler. He had disappeared.

“It looks like something isn’t adding up,” Detective Davis said, standing in the doorway. I picked my jaw up off the floor and sat down on the bed. I brought my hands up to my face, completely consumed, and fought back tears.

Detective Davis was clearly uncomfortable at the site of a grown man crying. He inched towards me, sat on the bed and tentatively put his arm around my trembling shoulder.

“This is all real, isn’t it?” he asked. I nodded. “Where do you think he is then?”

“I have no clue,” I said, my voice less than steady. “I have no fucking clue.”

“Well, I should-“

“I’m abandoned,” I said.

“You aren’t abandoned,” Davis replied, relaxing next to me. “Look, there’s nothing I can do legally unless there’s a body. As you can see, there is no body.”

“He took it with him,” I replied.

“And we can’t report it missing for another 48 hours.”

“So what do I do now?” I asked, more to myself than to Davis. What do I do now? What have I already done?

“In my opinion,” he said, reassuringly. “You stay here and see if this Tyler character returns.”

“You don’t believe me.”

“I believe you, buddy, I do. But there is nothing I can do right now. If he comes back, you call me and we deal with it.”

“If he comes back, he’ll kill me.”

It was definitive, as sure as day. There was no mistaking what Tyler would do if he came back. He’d know I’d gone to the police. He probably already knew. He would do with me what he did with everyone else in his life. Violence was the only language that Tyler spoke, and just like Wade said, I was disposable.

It killed me that I had been so stupid. A man who can kill his wife, her lover, his own lover and half an entire town didn’t have a sense of loyalty. I thought he’d fallen in love with me. But if he loved me, where was he now?

Abandoned.

“Look, if you want,” Davis hesitated. He spoke slowly, unsure of what he was about to suggest. “If you want, you can stay at my place tonight. We’ll deal with this in the morning when your mind is clear.”

I glared at him, assessing how serious he was by that request. There was no way I was getting any sleep tonight in this trailer. If I were to help Davis with this investigation, I would need a clear head.

“Yeah,” I said, breathing normally again. “I would really like that.”

It was a no brainer. Home with a gorgeous guy. Protected. Away from anywhere Tyler could get me.

Davis was more than gracious about letting me stay over. He cooked us corned beef hash and greens, the first actual meal I’d eaten since Ashley’s cooking a week ago. He insisted I take his bed while he slept on the couch. I didn’t feel right putting him out like that.

“Listen, it isn’t a big deal. I spent three years in the Corps, sleeping on the floor. The couch isn’t a big deal,” he replied when I insisted. He’d softened considerably in the past eight hours. He was sitting around in just a pair of sweat pants and a wife beater, drinking wine out of a glass. I had declined a glass of my own, opting instead for a beer in a bottle.

“Okay,” I said, still uncomfortable taking advantage of him. “Let me at least offer to share it with you.”

He looked at me for a second. I hadn’t minced words when I gave him my confession. I laid everything out there, including the fact that Tyler and I were sleeping together.

“We’ll see,” he said, bringing his glass up to his face. Without the glasses and the suit, one might have mistaken Davis for a friendly face. I could use all the friendly.

After another beer for me and a glass of wine for him, we opted to call it a night. He took the couch and I tossed and turned all night in his bed.

I barely managed a wink of sleep, thinking about Tyler every second I lay in bed. Where was he? What was he doing? Was it that easy for him to move on without me? Would he be back? At one point, I fell asleep and dreamed that he was standing in front of me, clicking a lighter on and off.

Need a light?

I screamed, woke with a start, and wondered where the fuck I was. Davis rushed in the room, standing before me naked and glowing in the dimness of the night.

“Everything okay?” he asked, rubbing his eye with the back of his hand. I was sweating.

“Yeah,” I lied. “Everything is fine. It’s fine.”

“Are you sure?” he inched towards me. There was a light dusting of hair on his chest and just above his dick and nowhere else. Even his legs were surprisingly smooth. “You were having a nightmare.”

He slid in the bed behind me.

“Jesus, the bed is soaked.”

“Sorry,” I said. “I was sweating and I—I’ll wash your sheets for you, I promise.”

“No, no worries,” he said. He yawned and lay down next to me. We both stared up at the ceiling. He had no clue how good it felt to have someone there next to me. Someone who didn’t scare the living daylights out of me.

“This Tyler guy really did a number on you, didn’t he?” he asked, for the first time sounding like he believed me.

“Yeah,” I replied, speaking his language for the first time. “He really did.”

“Why’d you stay with him?”

It was the million dollar question that I was never able to answer.

Protect love at all cost. You’ll die before you’re dead without it.

“I was in love with him,” I replied without hesitation. “And now I’m dead.”

Davis grabbed my hand and held it in his. It was an action I didn’t expect from him in the slightest. It meant more to me than anything I’d ever felt before.

“Look, I can only do so much to protect you and help you get to the bottom of this. There’s a demon in there that you have to work out, and I’m not sure I understand what it is.”

I knew what it was. It was the reason I had followed Tyler to start. It was the same reason Wade intrigued me so much. It was the reason why I could lie in bed with a man I barely knew and trust him.

I needed a light.

Davis looked at me with more sympathy than a devil like me deserved.

I slept through the rest of the night and well into the next day. I woke up to the familiar smell of pancake batter and warm maple syrup. I walked groggily into the kitchen where Davis was sipping coffee and flipping through a Dallas newspaper.

“Have a seat,” he said cheerfully. “I made breakfast.”

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“Nonsense,” he replied, waving me off. “It was good to have someone else to cook for for once.”

And Davis was a good cook. Between his dinner and his breakfast, I could have gotten used to food like that.

“So your details of what happened in Easton were correct,” Davis said after I’d sat down with a full short stack.

“Can we talk about something different while I eat?” I said with a full mouth. I wanted a few minutes of peace before I had to go back to the reality of my life.

“Sure, yeah,” he stammered. “Of course we can.”

“Tell me about yourself.”

“What do you wanna know?”

“What’s your story?” I asked, realizing I was using the exact same words Tyler had used on me.

“My story? Let’s see. My story; well I’m 42 years old. Been a cop for 20 years, love it.” He sipped his coffee.

“Married?”

“Never married,” he said with a sigh. “No kids either.”

I nodded .

“I know what you’re thinking,” he smiled at me. “Everyone in Wellmington thinks it, it’s no big deal.”

“Are you?” I asked after a long pause. He smiled at me with a hint of a wink in his eyes.

“Look, we need to decide where we go from here,” he said abruptly. “You can’t run from this forever, not to mention that I’ve broken protocol a thousand times over this already.

“With no evidence of a crime, no body, and no suspect, there’s nothing I can do to help you. Now if you knew where we could find Lafferty, we could bring him in for questioning and try to link him to the Easton Park matter. In 24 hours, we issue a missing persons report on Wade and see if we can link him to that as well.”

Davis made it sound so easy and breezy. Just pick him up, bring him in, link him to all the wrong he’d done, somehow leave me out of it, and all in the world would be fine.

“What happens to me?” I asked, too nervous to eat anything.

“Assuming everything you told me is true, you testify against him, and you restart your life.”

The thought of that scared me in its own right. How long had it taken me to find Tyler? Twenty-two glory hole filled years. There wasn’t a way to reset and start fresh, I thought. The heart doesn’t work that way. Part of me knew I’d made the right decision, but part of me wished I could take it back and go back to how things were.

I thought for a second about what to tell Davis. Forget the whole thing, I made it up, was my first instinct. Protect me, please, was instinct number two.

“I know where we can find him,” I said slowly, raising my head and making narrow-eyed contact. I needed to trust Davis more than ever, and so I let myself go and trusted him.

If I knew anything about Tyler, I knew where he would be right then.

And I knew that he would be waiting for me, clicking a lighter on and off, and waiting to ask me the question.

Need a light?