An Old Debt - 1. Chapter 1

The satellite radio went blank again, claiming it was ‘acquiring signal.’

“Remind me to cancel this stupid service when I get back home.” He told himself as the music returned just in time for the guitar solo. Smacking the wheel of his Jeep in time with the beat, Jason continued to search for the break in the field that indicated his turn. This was taking longer than he remembered. If he didn’t reach the farm soon, he might have to pull over to put the top up to escape what promised to be a blistering noon day sun.

Two songs later a sign alerted him his turn was in two miles. Panic gripped his stomach as he neared his destination. What if Bryan took offense at his offer? Hell what if he didn’t even remember who he was?

“Too late to turn back,” he said out loud. It really wasn’t too late, but it if he didn’t go through with it he wasted six hours, not to mention giving up a Friday night to get up at 4:00 a.m. to make it here in time to drive home. He was not going to stay at some crappy motel in this part of the state if it could be avoided.

A gas station with ridiculously old pumps and a run down ‘general store’ marked the corner where he should turn. McGruder’s Filling Station hadn’t changed in fifty years, let alone the last twenty. Turning right, he drove past the parking lot filled with pick up trucks and the odd sedan.

Four miles then turn left, or so his directions said. After twenty years he needed to rely on the GPS to get him home. Given how rural it was out here, he was not at all certain his directions were correct. If all else failed, there was still McGruder’s.

Making the left turn onto a street lacking a name, he could see a home off in the distance to his right. Dust rose from the middle of the field indicating an unseen vehicle was moving toward the house.

Swallowing hard, he put the Jeep into 5th gear and gave it some gas. Not another car in sight as he finished the last leg of his journey. When he turned right, an older green pick up was just coming out of the field onto the pavement. It stopped in mid turn and he could see the driver staring his way.

“Definitely too late now.” He thought as he brought his car to a halt twenty feet from the other vehicle. Bryan was visible in the window squinting as if trying to get a better look.

Opening the door, he looked down at his shoes, wondering if low cut hiking boots, a pair of khaki shorts and grey tee shirt was the right thing to wear to a farm. How gay am I worrying about my ‘outfit’ at a time like this, he thought.

By now Bryan had stepped out of the cab, a pair of work gloves in his left hand. Jeans and tee shirt still filled out nicely just as Jason remembered him in high school.

“Jason?” Tilting his head slightly to the right, Bryan stared intently at him.

Jason smiled despite himself. “That would be me. How are you, Bryan?”

“Stunned to see you pulling into my drive way.”

“Yeah, was something of a spur of the moment decision.” That was a lie. This trip took almost two weeks to plan out, given what he brought along.

“What brings you here?” Bryan took a few steps toward his guest. “It is not like I am on the way to anything.”

“Repaying an old debt you could say.”

This induced another puzzled look. “Really? To who?”

Jason resisted the urge to say, ‘to whom.’ Instead he pointed his finger at his host and said, “You.”

“Me?” Bryan arched his eyes then wiped his hands on his pants. “What debt do you owe me?”

Jason stretched his back and pulled the damp shirt off the skin of his back. He reached into the back seat and retrieved a black back pack. “For something you probably didn’t know you gave me.”

“That’s rather cryptic.” Bryan made his way to the front of Jason’s car.

“Can we go in the shade or something, it is getting a bit warm outside for my liking?”

“Yet you drove with the top down.” Bryan chuckled before he motioned toward the house.

“Seemed like a good idea at 5 am. And when you are moving, it isn’t quite so hot.”

Bryan led them into the old frame house. Jason had only been here once, it was during high school and was for a party he hadn’t been invited to. His friend Sara invited him as her ‘date’ even though the entire school knew he was the ‘gay one.’

Bryan bent into the fridge and said, “Beer?”

Staring at the butt framed by the dull white appliance, he almost forgot to answer. “No thanks, just a glass of water if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t have bottled water.”

Was that a hint of sarcasm? “Not a problem, I don’t buy them either; bad for the environment. Just tap water is fine.”

“Ice?” Bryan was already in the cabinet getting a glass.

“If you don’t mind.”

Bryan quickly filled the glass, picked up his beer and walked over to the large, worn oak kitchen table. He motioned for his guest to take a seat.

“Damn it’s been twenty years since I saw you. Have you been back home since high school?” Bryan took a long drink of beer.

The question, while expected, dredged up bad memories. “No. My parents made it clear I was not welcome. What else would I come back for?”

“Wow, sorry.” Bryan took another drink. “I had no idea things were that rough for you at home.”

“Once I turned eighteen, I was told I could finish high school, then I had to leave.” Twenty years later it was still painful. “Mom called here and there and before she died she came to see me, but there was never a reconciliation.”

“What about your sister and brother? Do you speak to them?” Bryan quickly lifted his bottle and nearly finished his beer.

Seeing how nervous Bryan was around him made Jason question whether he was too blunt announcing he was gay. No, it was probably just awkward seeing each other like this after twenty years.

He took a deep breath and said, “Christina and I speak often. I am her daughter’s god father, if you can believe it. The parents were upset, but she married a guy from L.A. Having a gay brother in law was no big thing. Josh and I still talk, we’re good. He and I were close as kids and he found a way past mom and dad’s prejudices.”

“How come you never came back to see him?”

“Being tossed out of your house at eighteen with just the cloths on your back and a couple hundred dollars does not leave you with a warm and fuzzy for the place.” He laughed before he teared up. “I was thinking of calling Josh before I go home, but I’m not sure I want to go there.”

“Wow.” He said again. “I never knew. Sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up.”

“No, it’s okay, you couldn’t know.” Not exactly how he envisioned this meeting, he thought. Putting the glass to his lips, he found he his mouth was suddenly very dry. The glass was nearly empty when he put it down.

“So,” Bryan said to break the awkward silence. “What is this debt I am owed?”

Jason fidgeted with his backpack and pulled out a thick yellow envelope. “I’m not sure how to say it so instead, let me give you this.”

He passed the packet across the table to his host. Bryan looked at the papers and then back to Jason. “What is this?”

“Open it. I think it will be self explanatory.”

Slowly, Bryan ripped the sealed envelope. His thick fingers carefully removed the papers as Jason watched his face for a reaction. After reading the first two pages, he looked up. “What’s this about? This is the deed to my farm.”

“I know, I bought it from the bank.”

“What?!?” Bryan’s chair nearly fell over when he jumped to his feet.

“Hold on let me explain.” Not the reaction Jason expected. “I heard from Josh you might lose the farm. So I did some checking. When I called the bank, they told me the foreclosure was complete and they were about to put it up for auction.”

“So you’re the out of town buyer.” Bryan’s body went rigid and his eyes narrowed. “You have a lot of nerve coming to my house like this. Did you want to tell me in person to get out?”

“No.” He was shocked Bryan would think that. “I bought it so I could give it back to you.”

Bryan looked from Jason to the papers in his hand then back. “What’s going on here?”

“As I said, I’m repaying an old debt.” Jason smiled now that Bryan calmed down.

“You never borrowed money from me. Hell I never had any to lend.”

“Ha!” Jason laughed. “Isn’t that truth. I never had any either. But this is a different kind of debt.”

“Come Jason, stop being beating around the bush, what’s this about?” Bryan sat down again, putting the papers in front of him.

“When we were in high school, around the time everyone else was calling me ‘fag’ or ‘queer boy’ you were one of the only kids who was ever nice to me. You even stopped John McKeiron from kicking the shit out of me out when he thought I was staring at his package.”

Bryan laughed. “Is that what that was about?”

“That and I told him if I had been looking, I wouldn’t have found it since I heard it was so small.” He laughed nervously, unsure how his host would take that comment.

“So what does that have to do with this?” He tapped the papers on the table.

“When I left this place, you were one of the few people I didn’t hate.” He twirled the ice in the near empty glass to distract himself. “In fact, you gave me hope that I could find decent people if I just went far enough away.”

“I did that?”

“There were only a few options available to me when I was told to move out. I really couldn’t stay in town, I’m not sure anyone would have rented to the village queer, let alone find someone to give me a job. The thought of going somewhere was terrifying. We barely went to town, much less to a big city.”

Jason shifted his gaze to the scars on the old table. “I seriously considered killing myself the night of your party. Seemed like a better alternative to a slow death on the street somewhere.”

He looked up to find Bryan staring at him. Shrugging he continued, “Sara had no idea what I was planning, she just thought I was scared thinking about moving away. She brought me as her ‘date’ to try to cheer me up. I guess she didn’t realize how much most of the guys hated me.”

“I don’t think they hated you, they were just being teenagers.” Bryan’s defense of his friends lacked conviction.

“No, it was hate. Until you experience their venom, you can’t understand how bad it was.” Jason stopped when he saw the expression on Bryan’s face. “Anyway, I would rather not dwell on them. During the party is when McKeiron threaten to beat the crap out of me. You stopped him. You had always been decent to me and it meant something.”

“Why? I was no one special, still ain’t. I live in my parent’s old home, I can’t manage the farm, I never went to college.”

Jason smiled. “At the time you were to me. You were the cute jock who was popular. Everything I wasn’t, but wanted to be. And no this isn’t a come on, I’m just telling you what I was thinking back then.

“Sara found the note I meant to leave and she pointed to you as an example that everyone wasn’t an asshole. She convinced me to go away and try to make a go of it first. I decided to give moving away a chance figuring if it got too bad, I could always kill myself later.”

Bryan eyes went wide. “Yikes, that was some plan.”

“I never said I was completely stable back then.” Jason kept his eyes on the table, refusing to look up.

“You look like you are doing okay now.”

With a small shrug, he looked up. “Things went well for me. I got a scholarship to the University of Minnesota, found new friends, gay and straight. Did a few things here and there, made a bit of money and invested it right before the market went crazy. I got lucky and sold out before things went bust. I won’t say it was anything brilliant on my part, I wanted to start a business and needed the money. Turned out to be a good decision. I had a business partner and we sold it last year for, well lets say it was a fair bit more than we invested.”

Bryan picked up the thick sheaf of papers in front of him. “How does all that lead to you buying my farm?”

“Josh told me you might lose the farm. That brought back memories of the night when I nearly killed myself. I realized if it hadn’t been for you I probably would have gone through with it. Call it stupid, but it seemed to me to be karma calling.”

“You’re into that mystic eastern stuff?” Bryan made a face that caused Jason to laugh.

“Who knows, but it was a chance to repay a debt.”

“A debt you don’t owe me.” He put the papers on top of the envelope and slid it back. “I can’t accept this, I didn’t earn it.”

“The value of a gift is in the eye of the receiver.” Jason ignored the papers.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You say you didn’t earn it, but to me my life is worth more than the price of this farm.” He tapped the papers. “Oh, I also purchased the notes on your equipment.”

The other man shook his head. “This is crazy. Twenty years ago I’m nice to you once and you pay a couple million dollars and just give it to me?”

“Well, not exactly give it to you.” Jason gave him a sheepish look. “Sara said if I give you the farm and equipment, you would owe hundreds of thousands of dollars in taxes.”

“Huh? How does that work?”

“Gift tax.” Jason waved his hands to let his host know he didn’t really understand it all himself. “Sara said if I buy the property and give it to you, that creates a gift from me to you. That means you have to pay tax on the full value of what I paid less eleven thousand dollars blah blah blah, yada yada yada. She ran the numbers and said it was going to be over $500,000.”

“So you kept in touch with Sara?”

Was that all he took from what Jason just said? Maybe he didn’t understand it either. “Definitely, she ended up at the U of M too. After school we stayed in touch. She was working as a slave at some big accounting firm. When I started my business, I needed an accountant, she needed a new job. Sara leveraged my accounting business into a partnership at a small accounting firm.

“All that is a long way of saying, if I give you the deed, you’ll be worse off than you are now.”

“So how are you giving it to me then?” Bryan sounded skeptical now.

“A hundred dollars a month rent, payable at the end of the year,” Jason shifted through the papers and found the one he was looking for. “You agree to maintain the house and grounds and pay the taxes. The loan for the equipment and other items, can be paid off over the life of the original loan at whatever the prime rate is on the day we sign the documents.”

Bryan shook his head in disbelief. “Jason, twelve hundred dollars a year? This place would rent for well over ten K a month.”

“So?” He flipped the document around and slid it toward Bryan. “I don’t know how to farm, nor do I need to learn. Maintenance on this place is worth quite a bit so I’m factoring the cost to hire you to maintain my house in deciding on the rent. I, however, will pay for materials and contractors as needed.”

Bryan was silent as he read the document. “You don’t sound like a very good business man to me. This deal will lose you a bundle.”

“No it won’t.” He finished his water and stood up. “I paid cash for everything. The contract is for as long as you want it to last. There is also a buyout clause where you can pay me or my estate the difference between what I paid and the cumulative total of rent you pay me over the years.”

“So I get a twelve hundred dollar reduction in the purchase price every year?” Bryan sounded dubious.

“Listen, I don’t want the place. I’m not a farmer.” The face he made caused Bryan to laugh.

“Farming ain’t so bad you know,” Bryan said. “So long as you don’t mind hard work and getting dirty.”

“Think about this, where would I go for fun?” He arched one eyebrow to make his point. “Can you really see me going down to the local bar on a Saturday night? Either I will send the straight boys a runnin or I’ll get the snot kicked out of me. No thank you. Kept green acres to yourself.”

They both laughed at the image this evoked.

“Come on, it isn’t so backward here,” Bryan said when he stopped laughing. “We have cable. We see how things are in the big city.”

They both laughed at this statement.

“The idea is that free from the mortgage, you can really save your money and buy it back if you want it. If you don’t I’ll just sell it and move on. I might give it to my brother’s kids, but that decision is for another day.”

“You ain’t kidding.” Bryan nodded vigorously. “If all I have to pay is $1200, maintenance, taxes and the equipment payment, I’ll be debt free in no time.”

“Read the paperwork and think it over.” Jason zipped up his backpack. “Just give me a call in the next few days. I left my contact information in the envelope.”

“What if I don’t want to stay?” Bryan asked.

Jason closed one eye and stared at his friend. “What happened to ‘farming ain’t so bad?’ Didn’t you just try to sell me on taking a try at it?”

They both laughed again. “Okay, you got me there. But what if I decide to try something else?”

Jason shrugged. “If you decide you don’t want to stay, don’t. I’ll figure something out. Maybe rent it for a time then leave it to my niece or nephews if they want to take up farming.”

Bryan shook his head. “You have that much money that you can lose your investment and not care?”

“Not really, but this land has value, quite a bit actually. Sure I will lose some money on the deal, but that was a risk I took buying the farm without asking you first. Josh and his wife will help me figure out what to do with it if you don’t want to stay.”

Bryan stared at him for a long time without speaking. Finally, Jason asked, “What?”

“I don’t get it, you really don’t want anything from me? Nothing?”

“Nope, nothing,” Jason said. “There is no way for you to truly understand what it was like for me when I lived here. Even the smallest ray of hope was more than I had at times. You may never believe this, but the simple gesture of stopping me from getting my ass kicked was enough to keep me going.”

Jason started playing with the little black fob on the end of the zipper to his backpack. An awkward silence developed where neither said anything. Finally Jason said, “I should be going. It is a six hour ride back to Minneapolis.”

He looked up and held out his hand toward Bryan.

Bryan didn’t accept the hand that was offered. “Hey, Jason, I, . . . um . . . you . . . I mean, you don’t need to go. You own the place after all.”

“Ha, no Bryan, this is and will always be your house for as long as you want. I just bought a little piece of paper from a bank.” Jason tried to laugh it off, but it was still too awkward. “Look, over time I have gotten better at telling people what I think so let me try now. I was never your friend, even if I thought of you as mine. I know that, hell you barely knew me. I can’t explain why I had to do this, its not pity or charity or anything like. Believe it or not, I did this for me. You don’t owe me, you don’t need to be my friend, you don’t even have to like me,” he held up his hand to stop Bryan from saying anything. “Please let me finish. Money is an amazing thing, you can do so much with it; good things, bad things, selfish, selfless, and more.

“When Brad, my business partner, and I struck it big, I wanted to ride back to town in the biggest Bentley I could buy. I was going to track down McKieron, find out where he worked, buy his company and fire him. My goal was to use my money to ruin everyone who made my life hell.”

“What stopped you?” Bryan asked when Jason took a breath.

“Sara. She froze my accounts for a month.”

First Bryan smirked then he laughed out loud. “Smart lady.”

“Better friend.” Jason’s face lost any trace of humor. “She pointed out how terrible things have a tendency to come back on you. If I went down that path it would destroy me, turn me into something I wouldn’t recognize.

“Just her telling me that made me wonder who and what I had become. I knew she was right. It took me a long time to purge the hate I kept inside. Instead of finding ways to pay back those who did me wrong, I set out to reward those who did right by me.”

“So you are into that mystic eastern voodoo,” Bryan joked.

“Voodoo is not from the east.” Jason rolled his eyes and snorted. “No, I attribute it to catholic guilt.”

“You’re catholic?”

“Recovering.” Jason smiled. “Even if I don’t consider myself catholic any more, it still is a good way to live. You helped me when I couldn't help myself, now it’s my turn.”

“Wow, that is deep,” Bryan said. “Honestly, I barely remember anything from High School much less helping you from being gay bashed. You really don’t owe me, least of all you don’t need to do this.”

“Too late.” He tapped the papers. “The money already cleared.”

Bryan’s eyes followed Jason’s hand to the papers. “This is going to be really rude, but I am dying to ask; how much money did you walk away with?”

“We split 1.2 billion dollars after we paid the investment banks, taxes, expenses and gave a share to our employees.”

“And you drive a jeep wrangler?” Bryan looked toward the driveway. “What happened to the Bentley?”

They both laughed and together said, “Sara.”

“I really need to go Bryan.” Jason said. “I probably ought to go see my brother, he doesn’t live far from here.”

“Doesn’t he live in your old house?”

“Yup.” Jason screwed his face up and nodded. “Bought it from my mom after my dad died.”

“Jason, all I can say is thank you.” Bryan held out his hand. They shook and Jason grabbed his backpack.

“I know I sound like a broken record, but thank you, Bryan.” Jason smiled at him again. “If you decide to stay, Sara’s office information is in the packet. She will take care of the paperwork.”

Jason pushed the screen door open and pulled his iPhone from his pocket. It was until Bryan walked up next to him that he realized he stopped walking.

“I speak to Josh all the time, and now I can’t seem to call him.”

“Confronting your demon is harder than meeting your angels after all.”

Jason turned and smiled. “Well said. Take care Bryan, whatever you decide.”

Tapping his contacts, he found his brother’s name. As he started the engine he heard the phone ring.

“Hey Jason.” He heard his brother say. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your call?”

“Hey brother,” his face broke into a big grin. Taking a deep breath he continued. “I was thinking of coming to visit.”

“Really? Are you serious?” To his surprise, his brother sounded excited by the news.

“Really.”

“Fantastic,” Josh replied. “We would love to have you. When were you thinking of coming?”

“Well,” his smile was so big he could barely speak. “I’m about ten miles away from the house. If tonight is okay, I’ll explain when I get there.”

“Fantastic!” Josh repeated. “See you soon.”

As he backed out of Bryan’s driveway, he realized he never put the top up. Somehow the sun didn’t seem quite so hot anymore.