You Make Me...Angry - 2. Chapter 2

2. Bravely Face Disappointments

Jae read the script that Junghee gave him. It was a love story about two lovers who had to fight the odds of tradition in order to keep their relationship. The male lead role was a man born in a small town, from a poor family. He’d worked his way to college, and worked as a lowly accountant. He falls in love with the company’s heir, the daughter of the company’s founder.

The role was a challenge but it fit Junghee to perfection. He would understand what the constraints of corporate life having grown up in such a setting.

Jae closed the script and looked up to find Junghee and Andre watching him expectantly.

“Well,” Junghee asked.

“It’s perfect,” he said with a reassuring smile. “I think you’ll do well.”

“Do you mean that?” Junghee demanded studying him with a narrowed gaze. “You’re not just saying it to appease me, are you?”

“I really mean it, Jung. The script suits you.”

Junghee took the script with a sigh. “I love your confidence. You do realize that I’ll be working with a new team. I haven’t done that since our debut days.”

“We’ll visit you during the shoot and bring food,” Andre promised.

Jae nodded in agreement.

“It’s a good change for you,” he said. “Besides, Dan’s explanation was sound. It’s good to have one of us in the spotlight while we work in studio.”

Junghee nodded his eyes bright with excitement.

Jae turned to Andre. “How’s your brother?”

“Happy, hard at work on his latest book,” Andre said then leaned forward. “Guys, what do you think of owning a golf resort?”

“Sounds interesting,” Junghee said with a nod. They both glanced at Jae and laughed when they saw his wince.

Jae scowled. “Why are you talking about golf resorts, Andre?”

Andre shook his head. “I’m not asking you to own it, or play golf for that matter. My brother and I came across this old golf resort. We thought if we bought it, and put money into it, it might turn out very well.”

Shoving his insecurities with golf away, Jae narrowed his gaze. “I can have my business manager, Tae Jang give it a look. If he thinks it’s a good purchase, you can start making plans.”

“Would he?” Andre smiled. “That would be great.”

“I’m meeting him later today. We’re going to see new property for a new Kim’s Café.”

“Kim’s Café in Seoul,” Junghee said excited. “Finally, I was hoping you’d cave in and get one here.”

Jae laughed. “I haven’t made a decision yet. Dan wants to see the business proposal before—

“Excuse me…”

They looked up to find Rin Lee standing a few feet away. Rin was a tall skinny man. He wore a dark cap over his short hair. Dressed in black t-shirt and jeans, he looked like one of the crew instead of the head of this production.

Jae got up and bowed to him. “Mr. Lee,” he started.

“Good gods, please call me Rin.”

Rin stepped closer and held out his hand. “I’m so happy to meet you at last. I’ve wanted to work with you since you dropped your first album. Rough Terrain was epic.”

Jae shook his hand, moving to give Andre and Junghee space to greet their new director.

“This is an honor, guys,” Rin said when he stepped back. “I can’t even explain. I’m excited.”

Jae grinned because a year ago no one had thought it an honor to work with Rebellion, the lack of broadcasting ability turned everyone away. It was a miracle they had Rin Lee saying it was an honor to work with them. He met Junghee’s gaze and smiled when his best friend winked at him.

“Alright, how about you guys go off and change. The stylist was hard at work setting everything up. Then we’ll meet back here and get started?” Rin asked.

“Sounds like a plan,” Andre said with a small clap. “Where to…”

****

He watched Jaehan change into the clothes the music video stylist had set out. Jaehan’s back was flawless, sculpted. He held his breath when he saw a tattoo on Jae’s left shoulder blade. They were words; he’d seen them before in previous magazine photos. Jaehan didn’t let too many people get a clear picture of them.

He focused his lens on the tattoo and took several frames. He’d share this one. He’d gotten to see Jaehan this way. Jaehan tugged a white sleeveless shirt on. He couldn’t help the gasp when Jaehan reached up and removed the rubber band holding back his hair. Silky dark locks fell around those elegant shoulders.

He snapped several pictures and froze when Jaehan turned, his gaze on the slightly open door. Jaehan’s frown appeared and he stalked toward the door.

****

Jae opened the door wide and stood staring at the empty corridor. He could have sworn he’d heard a gasp. Gods he hated new places. He wished they could have done the shoot at Jade Entertainment, but there was no space there. Shoving his fingers through his hair, he walked back to the dressing table. He took his wallet and phone to give to Ken for safekeeping. He left the dressing room eager to get started on the music video. Bravely was a song he’d written for them as a band.

He’d thought it perfect for their daunting task of getting into a music industry that didn’t want them or value them. He’d written the lyrics thinking of that fragile balance needed right before facing a daunting task. That fragile moment between fear, excitement and doubt…it was easy to say, be brave, do this…but it definitely took a strong balance of fear, excitement and shoving doubt away. He’d wanted to capture that moment in the song. Rin’s music video concept had captured his thoughts. He couldn’t wait to get it done.

If they could manage to finish the initial work today, he’d be grateful for that too. He wanted more time with Dan. Now that they were back, he’d promised himself to concentrate on their relationship. There was no tour to keep them apart, no pressing obligations. He smiled. Just everyday schedules, nine to five, he mused.

He’d spoil Dan with dinner every evening if possible. They could go out discretely.

“Mr. Kim.”

He glanced up to find one of the crew walking toward him on the corridor. “Are you ready, we’ll get you started on stage make-up?”

Jae nodded his smile widening. “Yes, I’m ready. What’s your name?”

****

That was close.

He pressed against the wall taking in deep breaths. He wasn’t ready for Jaehan to see him. Not like this, he sighed.

He peeped into the corridor, envious of the stylist’s assistant talking to Jaehan.

He’d give everything to get Jaehan to smile at him that way.

****

“Who else knows?” Dan asked. His heart filled with dread at the sight of the photographs on his desk.

Jae’s private moments. He was doing simple things. Taking the garbage out, watering a flower garden he’d insisted on growing in spring. Playing with the neighbor’s dog after it had found its way into the compound through the fence. Simple moments, yet so dangerous, someone had violated Jae’s complete privacy.

He wanted to rip this person’s head off.

“Junghee found out when he came to get the script.”

Harry sat back in the chair across his desk. “He hasn’t told Jae. He left it to you and me.”

Dan sighed.

“Increase security on them and reduce the number of people who know their daily schedule. Now that Junghee is going to join a new team, find two men to stay with him. Work his security into that team. Jae and Andre will work in the studio here. This way I’m sure no is watching Jae at home. Gods, have you sent a security team to the house? We need to sweep it for hidden cameras.”

“I already did that, but we can send them again.” Harry reached for his cell phone. “Are you going to tell Jae?”

Dan picked up a photograph of Jaehan laughing as he held the neighbor’s dog. Jae’s eye were bright with amusement, his head turned slightly as the dog licked his jaw. The picture was good, taken with a lot of love. He could have taken it himself. It scared him.

“I’ll tell him,” Dan said, his tone low as he placed the photograph on the desk. “Just not now, he’s really happy right now.”

“Keeping problems from him again,” Harry scoffed. “He’s no child you know. I don’t understand why you protect him this way.”

“I’m not starting this argument with you, Harry.”

“Maybe we should have it,” Harry said, his dark brown eyes hard. “He doesn’t know about your past, does he? You haven’t told him about Justine. If he doesn’t know, what does he know about you?”

“That I love him, and we’re happy,” Dan stated sitting down in his seat. He frowned at Harry. “Why are you bringing up Justine?”

“The anniversary is tomorrow,” Harry said. “You’d told me to make a big occasion for it. They’re expecting you.”

Dan sighed because he wasn’t going to make it. It hurt him to put off yet another occasion. He’d worked to make sure that he kept his obligations all his life. Last year he hadn’t managed because of getting Jade Entertainment on its feet. Tomorrow he wasn’t going to make it. He needed to go to Tokyo this afternoon for the Rand Agency case.

“Harry,” he started.

“I know, you can’t avoid the case in Tokyo.” Harry stood up. “At some point, you’re going to get exhausted carrying all the problems alone. When that day reaches, you’ll walk away from him. What happens to Jaehan then?”

“Whose side are you on?”

“Both of you,” Harry said severely. “Be open with him. You know every sordid detail of his past. Why can’t you tell him about yours? And if it’s because he can’t take it, then he doesn’t deserve you, Dan.”

Dan scowled when Harry turned and left his office without another word. What was wrong with Harry lately? He sighed and dropped his gaze to the pictures on his desk.

He smiled at one showing Jae running in the back lawn. Jae’s t-shirt was wet with sweat, his hair tied in a top knot. Jae loved running, what gorgeous form.

Frowning, he picked up the pictures and shoved them into the envelope they’d come in. Had the stalker felt the same when he’d taken these pictures? Gods, what a sick twisted type of love, taking the envelope, he put it into the top drawer of his desk and locked it.

He let a sigh escape when he glanced at the next folder on his desk. It read, Jade Entertainment vs. the Rand Agency. In the folder there were summons from the court to appear in person. Their reasons were that the court was to discuss matters that would affect the case. The problems did seem endless. So what if he wanted to protect Jaehan? Harry didn’t know what love was about.

****

Jae stood still in the middle of the empty commercial building. It had once housed a fashion store. Outside, people going about their daily lives filled the hip busy garosu-gil street.

Potential customers, he thought.

His gaze returned to the walls as they had so many times since he’d walked into the building. He couldn’t figure out what the original color was. Someone had scrapped of pink paint from the walls, leaving them a strange puce color. They’d stopped halfway as though it was too much work to clean up. The property was prime, but the clean up work…he shuddered.

“What do you think?” Tae Jang asked behind him, excitement coloring his voice.

Jae turned to look at his business manager. Tae Jang was smart. Streets smart. He’d grown up in the lowest streets possible. They’d met when he’d been struggling on his way up back in his N-sang Entertainment days. He’d liked Tae Jang’s knack for making money. The man was never wrong. They hadn’t gone wrong in all their business ventures in the past few years. Tae Jang had grown into his smarts, even going to school to supplement his business knowledge. The man loved suits, and had them tailored. Today he was in a grey suit, with a pale blue shirt. Tae Jang stood holding a thick folder with the business plan he’d anticipated Jae would ask for.

Jae hid the smile and kicked a forgotten wrapper on the scratched tile floor.

“Why did the fashion store leave?” Jae asked.

He walked to the east wall. The pink paint was calling him. It was so sickish, old and dirty, it reminded him of puke. He grimaced.

“They moved to a larger building in Apgujeong.”

Of course, for the more upscale market as well. He stepped away from the awful wall and looked around the large first floor. If he purchased the building, he’d gain two more floors above and a ground floor. Kim’s café would take up both this floor and the top floor. The ground floor he’d rent out to other businesses. The top floor, he’d reserve for a more high-end clientele. They could have a separate entrance. Hmm….it wasn’t a bad thought at all. He could see it happening.

“Tae Jang, we’re going to need an architect. Might as well do an overhaul of the entire building,” Jae said thoughtfully.

Tae Jang beamed.

“What about Mr. Suk?”

“We’ll go through the business plan tonight. Either way, I want the building,” Jae said looking around the place. “It’s perfect.”

“Great,” Tae Jang said pleased. “I was worried you’d say no. The other properties were okay, but this one is the best. I’d hoped.”

“Despite the pukish walls,” Jae said with a laugh. “What the hell were they doing?”

“I’ve tried to ignore them,” Tae Jang confessed, relaxed now that they’d reached an agreement. “I’ll get started on finding an architect.”

Jae nodded, glancing at the time on his phone. He wanted to go shopping for groceries. He still hadn’t decided what he wanted to cook for Dan.

“I think we should be heading out. I have another appointment,” he started.

“Of course, Jae,” Tae Jang started to lead the way out of the building. “I have a few architects in mind.”

Jae followed careful to step over plastic bags filled with trash. Clean up was going to cost them he frowned. Metal broke and crashed against glass. He froze, his gaze flying to the windows on the west of the building.

“What was that?” Tae Jang stopped reaching for him.

Maybe he shouldn’t have left Ken downstairs.

“Are you sure we don’t have stray animals living here?” Jae asked looking at Tae Jang.

He bit back a laugh because Tae Jang looked ready to pee himself.

“I’ll call animal control,” Tae Jang said reaching for his phone. “We can’t have stray animals in a café, that’s just—

“Relax, Tae Jang. I’m sure we’ll get it all sorted out soon.”

Jae gave the west windows one last glance before he started for the stairs. “Let’s go. I really need to get going.”

Outside, Ken led him to his black van. He waved at Tae Jang as the van pulled out of the back parking lot of the building. He smiled looking at the four-story building. It was nothing but a shell, but he saw promise.

“Where are going?” Ken asked. “Are we headed home?”

Jae glanced at the dashboard clock. It was almost four o’clock. “Supermarket, we need to get some groceries.”

Ken groaned.

Jae laughed and reached behind him to grab a black cap and dark glasses from the backseat. “No one will notice, Ken. I promise.”

An hour later found him busy tasting the chicken he had cooking on the stove. Satisfied with the amount of spices, he set the fire lower and covered the pot to simmer. Wiping his hands on the cloth tucked into his apron, he hurried to the fridge to get a bowl of gimchi from his mother. He’d yet to visit her this month.

Opening the lid, he sighed when he saw the gimchi was ending. He’d have to go see her now. Dan loved her gimchi and—

“Hey babe,” Dan said into the kitchen.

He glanced up to find Dan leaning on the doorjamb. His smile was involuntary. It came just at the sight of Dan looking so handsome.

He walked around the island table still holding the gimchi bowl. Stopping before Dan, he leaned up and pressed a kiss on inviting lips. Dan moaned and shifted to cup his face and deepen the kiss.

Jae closed his eyes, sinking into the indescribable pleasure of kissing Dan.

“How was your day?” Dan asked against his lips. Jae half opened his eyes to meet Dan’s warm dark brown eyes. Dan sipped his lips and he sighed.

“Good,” he murmured. “It just turned great by the way. I missed you all day.”

Dan pulled off the band holding his hair back. He sighed and pressed closer to Dan, the gimchi container between them. Dan ran fingers through his hair and he closed his eyes at the simple touch and laid his head on Dan’s shoulder.

“What are you making?” Dan asked holding him.

“Chicken, I was hoping we’d have a quiet dinner tonight.”

When Dan didn’t comment, he lifted his head. He met dark brown eyes and frowned. “What is it?”

Dan sighed. “I can’t stay. I have to leave.”

Jae stepped back.

“Cancel it,” he said placing the gimchi container on the counter next to him, “whatever it is you’re going to do, cancel it.”

“Jae,” Dan sighed and reached to touch his arm. Jae shook his head and stepped back.

“Why do you do this when we come back here? You come in here, tell me you’re heading to a meeting…” he frowned. “Are you going with Harry?”

“No.” Dan dropped his hand away. “I’m going to Tokyo. I’m needed there in the morning.”

Jae sighed and turned away before he started losing his mind. He’d just spent the past hour slaving over a chicken dish. It was five o’clock, and Dan was going away. Who was going to eat the darned chicken?

“Jae—

“It’s fine.” He removed the apron and threw it on the counter. “I should have called you first.”

“I can eat the chicken if you like.” Dan entered the kitchen and went to the simmering pot. He opened the cover and took in an appreciative sniff. “It smells really good.”

Jae watched Dan get a spoon from a drawer. The crashing disappointment inside him threatened to suffocate him. He’d wanted tonight with Dan. Wanted to spend time like they had in Chamonix, lazing around as though nothing outside the door mattered. Was he being naïve to expect this from Dan? The man was C.E.O now to a company that demanded his time.

“This is really good.” Dan said after taking a bite of diced chicken. “It has just the right amount of spices. Jae, you’ve gotten good at cooking.”

“What time is your flight?”

Dan covered the pot and placed the spoon in the sink. “In one hour.”

Jae nodded. Dan had to go. It would take him at least that long to get to the plane, then check in—

“Are you packed?”

“Harry handled that earlier.”

Jae scoffed.

“Of course,” he said unable to hide his annoyance with Harry.

Dan shut off the stove and crossed to him. “Is everything okay, Jae?”

He took in a deep breath and pasted on a smile.

“Yeah, everything is fine.” He pulled Dan into a tight hug. “When are you coming back?”

“Day after tomorrow,” Dan said pressing a kiss into his hair. “Please don’t give Ken a hard time. I’ve asked Harry to handle anything you need.”

Jae closed his eyes. “Why didn’t you call me earlier about this?”

“I wanted to but you were busy with the shoot. I’ll come back on Wednesday. We can have the whole day together if you want. Hmm…and please, stop going to the grocery store. You’re going to make Ken get grey hair.”

“Dan.” Jae pulled back only to have Dan tug him into a fierce kiss.

His worries shortly flew away as Dan kissed him, a fierce, needy kiss that left him with no doubt of Dan’s love. He tasted Dan’s love, his affection. The way Dan held him, so tight; heat flooded every inch of his body. He didn’t want the kiss to end.

Then Dan pulled back, touching his hair gently, before he let go of him.

“I have to go. I’ll call you when I land, okay. I love you.”

Jae stood in the kitchen even after Dan left, his own words of ‘I love you’ still ringing in the kitchen. He was alone in the house.

Junghee was busy with the drama. Andre was off playing soccer with his longtime friends. What was he to do? His old friends were tightly tied to his ex-boyfriend, Jaesun. When they’d split, he’d lost them too. Dan was his, but—

“Jae?” Ken called behind him.

Afraid Ken might see how pathetic he was; Jae stepped out of the kitchen to meet Ken in the corridor.

“I’m going out,” he said.

“Where are you going?” Ken asked.

“I don’t care where. Let me change, I’ll meet you outside. Don’t take the van.”

He hurried off in the direction of the bedroom he shared with Dan.

****

Ken stared after Jae with a sigh. He’d known the moment he’d seen Dan leave that Jae would react this way. Both Harry and Dan weren’t paying attention to Jae. Jae was alone, very lonely, especially when he wasn’t with Junghee and Andre. No one else seemed to notice this.

He went to the kitchen and stopped when he saw the food on the stove. He picked up the gimchi bowl still on the counter.

“Oh Jae,” he murmured.

****

Jae insisted on picking up So Jin, his older sister, from work. She was so excited to see him she almost gave him away. In the black Mercedes, So Jin held on to his hand tight.

“I haven’t seen you in forever. How is Dan? He’s always so busy now.”

Jae felt a stab at the thought of how busy Dan was.

“Dan is well,” he said quietly. “Have you seen mom?”

That question he asked with a tinge of guilt.

So Jin pinched his ear gently. “She misses you. She’s always asking when you’ll visit.”

He sighed and sat back in his seat, removing his dark glasses and the cap. “I’m sorry I’ve been so busy.”

So Jin shifted in her seat to study him. “What’s wrong?”

“Huh? Nothing is wrong.”

“You came to look for me.” So Jin frowned at him. “You could have just called.”

He flashed a grin. “I wanted to see your annoying face.”

“I’ll scratch your eyes out, my dear little brother.”

Spitfire So Jin, gods he’d missed her.

“Want to go out with me?” he asked.

She beamed. “Out on the town, out, or to some hidden place in the mountains?”

He laughed at her references to his imposed way of life. There weren’t that many places he could go without being recognized. The quiet places in the mountains were exclusive, places to keep his name out of the papers. Dan had forbidden him from indulging. He hadn’t stepped into a club in ages.

Dan, he scoffed with his rules and regulations.

What were they for if they didn’t seem to have time for each other anymore?

“Out on the town,” he said to So Jin.

“Sir?” Ken said from the front.

He met concerned eyes and shrugged.

I’m with my sister. It should be fine, Ken. So Jin, where do you want to go? Don’t hold back. It’s on me.”

So Jin clapped and leaned to press a kiss on his jaw. “We’re going to have fun.”

***

The club So Jin chose was loud and packed with people. Drinks on their table flowed. Jae sat back on the comfortable green couch, So Jin beside him. They’d attracted a crowd. Women he didn’t know, maybe So Jin’s friends, she seemed excited talking to them. There were guys too. One of them might have introduced himself as the manager of the club. He took the glass of whisky So Jin handed him and tossed it back. It went straight to his head. Burning down his stomach, he closed his eyes and welcomed the warmth that spread through him.

“Jae, want to dance?” So Jin asked.

He placed his glass on the table. He let So Jin pull him up. They headed to the dance floor with So Jin leading the way. He smiled at her when she twirled and gave himself up to the beat when she started dancing.

****

The harsh cry escaped him as he stared at the picture in the morning entertainment paper. Jaehan and a woman, he grabbed the bread knife on the table and stabbed it into the smiling girl’s face. He screamed in disgust.

Jaehan was his. No one else could touch him. No one!

He stabbed into the paper five more times before he stood up and walked to the wall of pictures.

She was dead! He grabbed the picture he’d taken yesterday of Jaehan hugging her so tight. A red haze blurred his vision at the sight. No one could touch Jaehan this way. She’d ruined it. She had to go.

****